Tag: Xbox

2K Sports Just Announced PGA Tour 2K21 from the CLOUDS

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Last year I went on the hunt for a golf game actually made this century since as we all know Tiger Woods PGA Tour hasn’t been a thing in years. Luckily I stumbled on to The Golf Club 2019, which is a pretty solid game as well as a very realistic round of golf.

It can be a little too realistic at times though and just as frustrating as actual golf is sometimes. Think Lee Carvallo’s Putting Challenge.

So I would like something a little more casual as it pertains to the laws of physics. Hell I’d love a new Mario Golf platform game, which Nintendo has kept locked away in its IP vault since 2003 for some reason.

Well out of nowhere 2K sports just announced they are coming out with PGA Tour 2K21! Talk about some much needed good news during this never ending quarantine. This is huge because despite its solid gameplay, one of the biggest drawbacks to The Golf Club 2019 is that it doesn’t have the full PGA license so there are only a couple of real courses and zero real golfers in the game. Well PGA Tour 2K21 seems to have no such issues as the teaser shows off the gorgeous 17th green island at TPC Sawgrass.

PGA Tour 2K21 will actually be developed by HB studios too, which is the group that made The Golf Club 2019. 2K teased the fact that more info will be released next week. So help me God if this game isn’t coming out real soon because without actual golf or actual anything happening right now, I think we are all going a little stir crazy.

Take my $60 right now and let me and Brooks Koepka CRUSH the competition as we go for the Tiger Slam.

Grand Theft Auto 6 is Only in “Early Stages of Development.” You’ve Got to Be Kidding Me

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Kotaku – “Rockstarā€™s leaders have told employees that they hope to mitigate crunch on the next big project by improving their technology pipelines and planning out more of the gameā€™s beats in advance…One plan that management has laid out for the next game, a new entry in the Grand Theft Auto series, is to start out with a moderately sized release (which, by Rockstarā€™s standards, would still be a large game) that is then expanded with regular updates over time, which may help mitigate stress and crunch.

But thereā€™s a catch: Rockstarā€™s next big project is still early in development.“

As we all look for anything to distract us from the endless days and nights spent at home, a new Grand Theft Auto game wouldn’t hurt. Especially when you consider the last one came out in 2013 as the PS4 was just hitting shelves. The above Kotaku article is a great look into the dysfunction that was rampant at Rockstar including mental hours for everyone working on these games. So the company underwent a huge cultural change, including lightening up the workload for employees. Good for them, not so much for us man boys. Apparently the next Grand Theft Auto is only in the “early stages of development.” Even worse, Rockstar is allegedly considering first coming out with “a moderately sized release” for GTA VI and then adding to it over time. Well I hope they are selling the game for a “moderately sized price” too then. Theres nothing worse in video games than micro transactions and for better or worse Rockstar has written the goddamn book on them with GTA Online. So this doesn’t sound all that farfetched unfortunately.

I’ve read about the horror stories of crunch to get these massive games done and the burnout from developers, but Grand Theft Auto V *alone* has sold over 120 million copies, become the “most profitable entertainment product of all time,” and has generated over six BILLION dollars in revenue. So I don’t want to hear about the workload of the developers. Hire more employees you cheap fucks.

I’m sorry for snapping at you Rockstar, but we’re in the middle of a quarantine so this is not the type of news I needed to hear right now. It’s already been seven years since GTA V came out. Thats bananas. Granted these games have grown exponentially in size and scope, but that wait time is unheard of. There was 1 year between GTA 3 and Vice City, 2 years between Vice City and San Andreas, 4 years between San Andreas and GTA IV, and 5 years between GTA IV and GTA V. So obviously the wait times have increased as the games have become monstrous creations, but we’re already 2 years behind schedule and the game’s not even close to being done.

But if you’re really craving any type of GTA content to avoid working, here’s an hour long movie on the history of the franchise.

Madden is Losing It’s Exclusivity Deal With the NFL, Which Means NFL2K is Coming Back!

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Yahoo – For the first time in over 15 years, “Madden” is getting some competition in the world of football video games.

The NFL revealed on Tuesday morning that it’s ending its years-long exclusivity deal with Electronic Arts on football games. “Madden” will continue to be produced in partnership with the NFL, but the NFL is also working with 2K Sports ā€” the company behind the smash-hit “NBA 2K” franchise.

That new arrangement encompasses a “multi-year” deal that includes “multiple future video games” ā€” the first of which is expected to arrive next year, in 2021.

The worst thing that ever happened to Madden was the exclusivity deal EA signed with the NFL because it removed any real competition. Madden was always the best football game on the block, but only because it actually had to be. 2K closed the gap when I was in high school and a ton of people still argue that NFL 2K5 was the best, albeit 2K’s last, football game ever made.

Thats not just me looking back fondly on the PS2 days either. NFL 2K5 got a 9.2/10 on GameSpot, a 9.4/10 on IGN, and a 92% on Metacritic, which bested Madden reviews in two out of three as Madden 05 actually got a 9.5 from IGN. Still pretty damn good for a game that just ended up getting shelved a few months later.

So once 2K was no longer there to keep pushing Madden, things got a little stagnant. Madden was always introducing new features with every version of the game, some more beloved than others (I actually enjoyed the Vision Cone), but just look at this run of iconic additions.

  • Madden 99 – Franchise Mode introduced
  • Madden 03 – Online head to head play
  • Madden 04 – Vick God Mode/Playmaker Control/Owner Mode/Mini Camp
  • Madden 05 – Hit Stick
  • Madden 06 – QB Vision Cone/Superstar Mode
  • Madden 07 – Truck Stick

Madden was always trying things out because they had to keep the game fresh. Once any shred of competition was removed, Madden was able to just update the graphics and the rosters each year and sell you the same old shit for $59.99 every August. Madden 07 (released in 2006) was the last year any substantial feature was added to the game in my opinion and that was FOURTEEN YEARS AGO.

I would love for these two giants to go head to head like the good old days, but it seems like 2K may try and go in a slightly different direction.

Notably, 2K says the games it’s creating are “non-simulation football game experiences” described as “fun, approachable and social experiences.”…EA issued the following statement in response to Tuesday’s announcement: “EA Sports is the exclusive publisher of NFL simulation games, and our partnership with the NFL and NFLPA remains unchanged. Our agreements have always allowed for non-exclusive development of non-simulation games on various platforms.

Whatever the hell that means, your guess is as good as mine. It seems like, through 2021 at least, 2K won’t be able to create a true “simulation game” so we may not get a direct competitor to Madden right out of the gates. Perhaps something thats officially licensed by the NFL, but maybe a little…different? Something a little more…arcade style. Something like…

Now we’re talking!

But so help me god if 2K tries to pass off some card based garbage mobile game. Just give us something that will make the folks at EA a little nervous so we start getting legitimately innovative games once again.

Poor Sean Bean, the Video Game Hitman 2 Now Even Lets You Kill Ned Stark

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Engadget – Movie producers have seemingly gone out of their way to kill Sean Bean in whatever role he plays, so it only makes sense that you could off him in a game, right? IO Interactive certainly thinks so — it has revealed that the first Elusive Target in Hitman 2 is none other than the perpetually ill-fated actor. Bean plays Mark Faba, an ex-MI5 agent who has become a freelance assassin. He’s nicknamed “The Undying” due to his knack for faking his own death, but you’re clearly there to put an end to that streak.

This guy gets axed in *spoiler alert* EVERYTHING. Now he’s even going to get gatted in video game form thanks to Hitman 2. Count me in.

Sean Bean’s got 131 acting credits to his name on IMDB and I would guess he dies in no less than half of those. I’ll also never forget Papa Giorgio just straight up ruining Game of Thrones for me, despite himself, never having watched an episode. Back in 2014 I’m finally diving into Season 1 of Thrones and burning through it when he walks in and says “Oh he’s still alive?” Well the next 5 episodes were just me waiting for the inevitable Sean Bean death scene.

PS – Hitman was an absolute BANGER back in the day on my PS2 in high school, but after about 5 minutes of sneaking around every mission turned into this:

Hero Helps His Wife Prep for Her MLB Broadcasting Debut by Playing Video Games

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Yahoo – Jenny Cavnar didnā€™t have long to prep before providing Colorado Rockies play-by-play. She found out she would have to fill the role the day before the game, so she didnā€™t have a lot of options to get in some last-minute practice before her play-by-play debut. Thatā€™s when her husband hatched a plan, according to Joon Lee of Bleacher Report. He would play ā€œMLB: The Showā€ and she would call his game..They fired up the game, selected the San Diego Padres as the Rockiesā€™ opponent ā€” since that was the matchup Cavnar would call the next day ā€” and gave it a shot.

Shoutout to this guy for getting massive brownie points for helping his wife prep for the biggest day of her career while ALSO playing PS4 at the same time. His wife is getting called up to the big leagues, literally, to not only call a professional baseball game which is huge, but also be one of the first women to ever do it. Pressure cooker like you read about.

So what does my man do? Johnny on the spot here with the idea to have his wife simply call his game of The Show. He gets to do absolutely nothing while not even really having to talk to his wife while also appearing to be the most helpful husband in America.
This guy is bred for greatness. I feel like this should be a Miller Lite commercial or better yet Dave Chappelle should re-enact this scenario for an episode of Great Moments in Hookup History.

PS – I’ve bought two baseball games in the 13 years since the MVP Baseball franchise breathed its last breath in 2005 because every game since then is hot garbage. If I ever run for public office that will be my platform. #MakeMVPBaseballAgain

Madden Pro Going Nuts Reminds Me of The GOAT Madden Meltdown I Saw in College

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Look we’ve all been there. I’ve smashed more clickers than I care to admit and so have all of you. Glass houses guys.

But, this dude flipping the fuck out reminded me of the GOAT Madden meltdown I witnessed in college. I was playing my roommate and I was feeling myself so I picked a shittier team, knowing it would drive this kid up a wall if I took it to him with the 2008 Raiders.

You know the unbeatable 2008 Raiders that went 4-12 behind stud No. 1 overall pick, and my boy, JaMarcus Russell. If there ever was a guy built for a fucking video game it was this dude. Absolutely awful in real life, but in a video game he had an absolute cannon and he could run his balls off. Thats all I need boys.

So in case you forget just how truly shitty this team really was back in 08, here was the starting skill position players:

QB: JaMarcus Russell
RB: Darren “Run DMC” McFadden
WR: Javon Walker, Chaz Schilens, Ashley Lelie, Johnnie Lee Higgins, Ronald Curry
TE: Zach Miller

Not exactlyyy Murderers Row, but the Raiders did also have Nnamdi Asomugha before he fell off a cliff and DeAngelo Hall patrolling the secondary. (Thats called foreshadowing guys)

So anyways, I am scoring *at will* on QB scrambles out of the shotgun, HB screens, and 70 yard bombs in the air. If JaMarcus Russell saw how much better he was in Madden than in real life I think he might actually kill himself. But to top it all off the Oakland defense is smothering my roommate with interception after interception after interception. My roommate is fucking BOILING and I’m not a huge trash talker so I’m just waiting for the straw to break the camel’s back.

Well that would come in the form of my SEVENTH interception of the day, which also happened to be a pick-six that put me at 70+ points on the afternoon…in the 3rd quarter.

“FUCK THIS GAME!”

Roommate stands up and absolutely Gronk spikes the $50 PS2 clicker into the fucking floor. Let me tell you, I have never seen a piece of hardware fly into so many pieces as that Playstation clicker did. We had to have a closed casket funeral for that PS2 clicker.

And that my friends is why you don’t stream yourself playing a game of Madden because we are all one bullshit play away from rifling a clicker through the goddamn window.

NBA 2K esports League to Launch With 17 Teams and I Will Watch the Shit Out of It

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And we’re off. It was officiallyĀ announced that there will be 17 teams participatingĀ in theĀ inaugural season of the NBA 2K esports League in 2018. Good looks by 2K on the official sponsorship, my sources are telling me they narrowly edged out the NBA Jam franchise.

To be honest, I’m surprised the NBA got this many teams to participate, but I for one am all aboutĀ this. God forbid MLB tried this, it would take a decade of old guys debating how this would sullyĀ the history of the game. As a guy who plays far too many video games, breaking only to watch sports, this is a win-win.

I would watch the shit out a YouTube show documenting how the Celtics go about building their team, scouting, recruiting, training and competing.

Might have to call up Wyc and pitch that idea myself. Franchise that shit out as a vlog for every team…

We’ve all heard how big esports are becoming (hell even colleges are offering esports scholarships now), but it was mainly for games like League of Legends, which I’ve never even contemplated playing. But when you catch something a little more accessible like a Call of Duty tournament on G4, its just nuts how good the guys are.Ā In the same way its nuts watching professional sports. The NBA knows a cash cow when they see it coming down the road, like ya know god damn La Liga patches on jerseys.

So a lot of people will say this is for nerds and nerds alone, but in the same sense its hard to appreciate just how good LeBron James is if you’ve never played competitive basketball. I am 5’8″ and didn’t make it past youth basketball so watching what that manchild can do resonates with me. I have a frame of reference as an average white guy with just how absurd LeBronĀ is at basketball.

Here are the 17 teams that will be a part of the inaugural NBA eSports league.

  • Boston Celtics
  • Cleveland Cavaliers
  • Dallas Mavericks
  • Detroit Pistons
  • Golden State Warriors
  • Indiana Pacers
  • Memphis Grizzlies
  • Miami Heat
  • Milwaukee Bucks
  • New York Knicks
  • Orlando Magic
  • Philadelphia 76ers
  • Portland Trail Blazers
  • Sacramento Kings
  • Toronto Raptors
  • Utah Jazz
  • Washington Wizards

What I’m curious about is how the hell you can get 5 guys playing together on one NBA 2K team. Have you ever tried playing with a buddy on one team? Fucking impossible. You basically just end up playing iso ball and looking for running screens chucking upĀ 3’s falling out of bounds because its impossibleĀ to try and run any semblance of a real play.

So yes, I will watch the shit out of this. Will I pay to watch this? Probably not, but I’ve bought dumber things. So, probably, yes.

GameSpot Absolutely Roasts Xbox 360 With Subliminal Messaging

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gamespot_xbox

So apparently Tyler Durden works for GameSpot now. GameSpot put out a video yesterday to honor the Xbox 360 since they are officially halting production of the system. Then, like Brad Pitt splicing porn into family flicks in Fight Club, for a split second GameSpot absolutely roasts Microsoft with a shot of the one thing that pissed more people off than the Water Temple; The Red Ring of Death. Blink and you miss it. I had to rewind the video a couple of times just to get the screenshot it was so quick. Savage move, but 100% true. Halo, Gears of War, Mass Effect all incredible games. Doesn’t change the fact my 360 died more deaths than a cat and finally got sent to the great Xbox farm in the sky before I defected back to PlayStation. Sorry Bill Gates.

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