Hanley Ramirez is Store Brand Manny Ramirez

ESPN – [Hanley Ramirez] was told he’s 5-for-35 with eight strikeouts in 45 plate appearances against lefties, a far cry from his .346 mark last season or his .300 career average against southpaws. “You’re kidding me,” Ramirez said. “It took you long enough to tell me that. I didn’t know that, for real. So OK, after this conversation, let’s see what’s going to happen now. I’ll say it: Bring it, OK? I didn’t know. I swear. Interesting. Thank you.”

What a shitshow this guy is. I gotta tell you, I’m souring on Hanley Ramirez pretty quickly this season. Ever since David Ortiz retired, without the benefit of someone telling him to get his shit together, Hanley has increasingly become more and more like Manny Ramirez. Just doing Manny Being Manny shit.

Like laughing off how abysmal he’s hitting lefties this year. Or legitimately refusing to play First Base. Or sitting out with sore shoulders, while his much less heralded teammate Mitch Moreland is mashing home runs and playing First Base with a broken fucking foot.

Hanley Ramirez has become store brand Manny Ramirez. He acts like Manny, he gets babied like Manny, he is a general pain in the ass like Manny. Except he doesn’t hit the goddamn ball like Manny. If you wanna be treated like a superstar then you better be hitting moonshots onto Landsdowne. If you wanna sit out games and laugh about how shitty you’re playing, then the Manny treatment is over.

Even for one of the greatest righthanded hitters of my generation, eventually that act wore thin in Boston. And LA. And Tampa Bay. Imagine how much quicker that shit happens if you’re hitting .241/.341/.406 with 10 home runs, 29 RBIs and a WAR of 0.1. Let me repeat that, Hanley Ramirez has a WAR of 0.1, which means he is BARELY better than an average guy out there at first. Thats essentially what Mitch Moreland is and the Red Sox have fared far  better with him playing than Hanley.

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