The Fast and Furious 9, or F9 if you want to be official, trailer is here and it. is. glorious. I’m what some may call a bit of a hipster Fast fan as I was an un-ironic diehard of the original. Seriously, I made the mecca to LA to visit Dom Toretto’s house.

2 Fast 2 Furious was fine, but then I also loved watching Tokyo Drift, especially drunk after the bar since Spike TV aired it at 2 am routinely.

A lot of people jumped on the bandwagon with the release of 4 and 5, but I cannot state how excited, albeit skeptical, I was when Vin Diesel revealed the plan to have TEN movies in the Fast-verse. Now No. 9 is up along with another nonsensical title which I have to believe is being done intentionally at this point. Seriously just look at this:

The Fast and the Furious
2 Fast 2 Furious
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift
Fast & Furious
Fast Five
Fast & Furious 6
Furious 7
The Fate of the Furious
F9

Now lets break down some of the highlights of this Oscar bait.

Dom apparently has a son now?

John Cena Toretto

Charlize Theron has my 6th grade haircut now so there’s that.

Potentially the most absurd stunt to date and thats saying a lot in this franchise.

A Pontiac Fiero with a rocket strapped to it that is apparently faster than a jet.

Also, it seems we are seeking Justice this time around so someone’s been killed, but I can’t imagine they killed off Paul Walker’s character? Then again his wife Jordana Brewster is prominently featured so maybe?

Not to mention the shocking reveal at the end of the trailer. I’ll admit, I gasped. I won’t spoil it for those who haven’t watched the trailer yet but it’s a trip.

This bad boy hits theaters on May 22nd and I will be there with bells on.