Tag: Basketball

Cavs Players Are Now Telling Jimmy Butler to Stay Away from the Dumpster Fire that is Cleveland

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Chicago Sun Times – No stranger to organizational dysfunction, Jimmy Butler was warned Tuesday night to stay away from the Cavaliers. According to a Cleveland source close to the situation, several of the Cavaliers who had been prodding Butler to push for a trade from the Bulls the last five days were now warning him to stay away from a suddenly volatile situation.

Jesus. Christ. Cleveland, this is why you can’t have nice things. A live look at the state of the Cavaliers right now:

What a goddamn disaster. You guys were literally JUST in the NBA Finals. Sure, you got smacked down by Golden State, but you are without a doubt the second best team in the NBA. Yet somehow, the Cavs are now in complete disarray. They shitcanned the GM the *same day* he was balls deep in trade talks with other teams. Now there are rumblings that LeBron may be bolting town for Los Angeles sooner than later. Bill Simmons, who knows a thing or two about the NBA, is convinced its going to happen.

With that shit storm spiraling around, Cavs players are apparently telling Jimmy Butler to stay the hell away. The GM is out, LeBron could be gone after next year, no one knows what the hell is going on. So Butler reportedly is saying ah nevermind I’ll stay in Chicago. Butler would rather stay on a 41-win team than go to the team that just played in the NBA Finals (and the last 3 years in a row) and has arguably the best player in the world on its roster. Yeesh.

“[Kyrie] Irving has been contacting some of his former Team USA mates, letting them know that he might be willing to push for a trade, especially with the latest drama unfolding in Cleveland..Through back channels, Irving let it be known that he’d be interested in coming to Chicago.”

Oh man it is gonna be FUN watching what happens throughout the NBA today.

LeBron Littlefinger James Continues to Pull the Strings and Gets Cavs GM Fired

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ESPN – The Cleveland Cavaliers have parted ways with general manager David Griffin, the team announced Monday. Griffin’s contract was up at the end of the month, and after extensive talks with owner Dan Gilbert, no agreement on an extension was reached..Cavs star LeBron James, who sources said was not consulted on the decision, tweeted out support of Griffin.

Jesus christ, ya drop 2 out of 3 NBA Finals and all of a sudden Cleveland is turning into a complete shitshow. Canning the GM days before the draft, while the guy is also balls deep into trade discussions just reeks of an impulse decision. Or who knows, maybe Griffin was sick of hearing shit from both ends, getting badgered by ownership and by LeBron, and just said FUCK THIS I’m out.

Either way, this is classic LeBron “I’m not the GM”  James through and through. Griffin built the second best team in the NBA and did just about everything LeBron wanted. He traded Andrew Wiggins for Kevin Love. The No. 1 overall pick and LeBron said send that teenager packing I need the white boy who can hit some 3’s and Griffin did it. He gave a max contract to Tristan fucking Thompson.

LeBron bitched the team didn’t have enough talent so Griffin traded for Andrew Bogut (who actually got hurt) and brought in guys like Kyle Korver and Derron Williams. Then the Cavs just happened to run into an all-time team in the Warriors and it wasn’t good enough. Instead of sitting down and figuring out, okay how the hell are we gonna beat these guys in Golden State, ya know, like a competitor would do – instead LeBron throws a bitch fit and gets the GM fired.

LeBron is basically the Littlefinger of the NBA. GM’s getting ousted, coaches getting fired, nonsensical trades and deals being made. The guy just loves the chaos.

LeBron’s little buddy Brian Windhorst can report all he wants how LeBron was “surprised” by the move:

But everyone knows whats up. Griffin was just LeBron’s latest fall guy. He’s the new Mike Brown. The new David Blatt. I’m not the coach, I’m not the GM, you guys built this shitty team not me so I’m gonna throw a temper tantrum and threaten to leave unless you axe this guy.

And that is why we don’t negotiate with terrorists. You pamper these guys and give them everything they want and then they turn around and throw everyone under the bus for making the exact moves you wanted them to make. Sorry LeBron, the Cavs are literally barren of assets to trade for a guy like Jimmy Butler or Paul George because of all these fucking moves you wanted the Cavs to make over the years.

Welp, godspeed to the next guy who’s got to take that job and get cucked by LeBron every day. Rumors are picking up steam now though that Chauncey Billups may actually take the job, which is probably the best thing for the Cavs despite Chauncey Billups having zero experience in the role. Billups can be the Ty Lue of the front office. Ty Lue, the guy who legit told LeBron to go fuck himself, was the best thing for LeBron. So there’s your blueprint Chauncey, godspeed.

LeBron Paved the Way for Super Teams and is Now Upset He’s Getting Beat by a Super Team

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Yahoo – In a sense, if Cleveland Cavaliers superstar LeBron James is frustrated by the 2017 NBA Finals, his search for how the Golden State Warriors became so darn indestructible should really begin within. Unable on his own to topple the late 2000s Boston Celtics — a contender forged by trades for Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen in the summer of 2007 — LeBron left the Cavs in 2010 to replicate a super-team blueprint alongside incumbent Dwyane Wade and fellow newcomer Chris Bosh on the Miami Heat…Though Durant says he did not consider James’ precedent, he readily admits, “He paved the way.”

LeBron must have thrown a fucking fit when he saw this quote from Kevin Durant. Recent quotes from LeBron have made it seem like he’s already resigned to his fate because the Warriors are just more talented. Oh you don’t like stacked teams beating up on you? Well you started the trend homie. Its actually pretty funny when you think about it. As much as I hate the trend of AAU buddies teaming up and building super teams, Durant’s right; LeBron set the precedent.

“You crossed the line first, sir. You squeezed them, you hammered them to the point of desperation. And in their desperation, they turned to a man they didn’t fully understand.”

After reading that story, this Alfred quote from the Dark Knight is the first thing that popped into my head. It’s dead on. Like when Batman took down most of the Gotham underworld he set a new precedent for criminals and they kicked it up another level by bringing in the bat shit crazy Joker. LeBron is basically Batman in this situation with the rest of the league being the Gotham mob bosses, which is a sentence I never thought I’d write.

“You spat in the faces of Gotham’s worse criminals. Didn’t you think there might be some casualties? Things were always going to get worse before they got better.”

The NBA is essentially a copy cat league. If you can’t beat em, join em.

Now Durant is basically saying, “Cry me a fucking river. It’s time for KD to get his shine.” I just really hope this doesn’t become a goddamn blueprint for future superstars. Get drafted, make your team title contenders every year without quite winning one, jump to the path of least resistance to win a ring or two, then come back to your original team to play the savior card. Because that, my friends, will get old reallll fast.

And, yes I realize I make far too many Batman references in my ramblings about sports. Deal with it. The Bat Man is the goat.

Wait, Not Every NBA Team Has Their Own D-League Team? How is That Possible?

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Bleacher Report – The Los Angeles Clippers announced Monday they’re establishing an expansion team in the NBA D-League. The Agua Caliente Clippers of Ontario will begin play at the start of the 2017-18 season in Ontario, Calif. “This is another exciting day for the NBA D-League as we add a record 26th team and continue to move closer to our 30-team vision,” league president Malcolm Turner said in a statement.

Maybe I’m just a moron, but I had no idea that not every NBA team has a D-League team? How is that even possible? Are the other NBA teams just drafting guys to either start Day 1 or stash overseas and if you don’t fit into one of those two plans? Well, right to hell with you. Its called the D-League for a reason. Its the Developmental League. Theres a reason it exists. To develop players. And apparently a bunch of teams are just punting on having a minor league team?

So NBA teams are just trusting other organizations with their draft picks like a loan system out of the Premiere League? I don’t even trust my coworkers to borrow a pen without fucking it up.

The Clippers had been one of the few teams without an official affiliate in the D-League. Upon being sent to the D-League, rookie forward Brice Johnson played for the Salt Lake City Stars, a Utah Jazz affiliate. Rookie center Diamond Stone split his time between the Stars and the Santa Cruz Warriors, who are under the Golden State Warriors’ umbrella.

This would be like the Red Sox wanting to groom a player, but not having a minor league team so just saying eh, fuck it go play for the Yankees Triple-A team in Scranton/Wilkes-Barre for a few months. Bananas.

Its not like the D League (apologies, the Gatorade League) is a place where players go to die like some sort of exile. There’s been some pretty legit NBA players that have come out of or been optioned to the D League in their first couple of years:

Avery Bradley

JJ Barea

Marcin Gortat

Jeremy Lin

Chris Birdman Anderson

It seems like more of the league is starting to figure out its probably not a bad idea to have a place to develop talent without having to throw guys into the fire in the NBA.

Right now the only teams without a D League squad are the Denver Nuggets, New Orleans Pelicans, Portland Trail Blazers, and Washington Wizards.

How many championships have teams that place zero interest on developing talent won? Well, that would be two titles. Between four teams. In the entire HISTORY of the NBA. Two. The last one coming in 1978 when the Wizards were the Bullets. So hey, don’t fix what ain’t broke boys.

LaVar Ball’s AAU Team Gets Blown Out; LaVar Ball Does Not Give a Shit

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USA Today – Saturday’s AAU matchup between LaVar Ball’s Big Ballers and the Compton Magic could not have gone worse for the outspoken father of Lonzo, LiAngelo and LaMelo Ball. With James Harden in attendance, the Big Ballers, led by LaMelo, were blown out 109-57. According to USA TODAY Sports’ Josh Peter, it got to the point where Compton Magic players were talking trash to LaVar as they celebrated plays.

Welp, thats what happens you talk nonstop shit every day to anyone who will listen. The second you don’t back it up you are going to get absolutely clowned. To make it worse it was getting clowned to the tune of a 50 point blowout while teenagers laugh in your face.

Thats the problem with LaVar, he’s basically setting his kids up for this kind of shit. If you’re Lonzo and a top-3 NBA draft pick, then sure you don’t give a shit. But if you’re the 15 year old third brother, who’s throwing up bricks all goddamn game, maybe, just maybe the LaVar Big Baller Brand bullshit is in your head a little bit more than the NBA Lottery Pick brother.

But how about this fucking quote from LaVar legit during the game.

“A few minutes later, Ball opened his mouth again and told one of his players, “This ain’t nothing but entertainment. You want to know what I’m going to do when I get out of here? I’m going to get a burger, lay down and take a nap.’’

Thats probably the worse shit this guy’s said yet, especially if you want to pretend to be a coach on top of everything else. I know its AAU basketball and there is NOTHING worse than the generation of whiny, entitled AAU players that the NBA is filled with today, but holy shit lets not even pretend the game is a competition.

That is a TERRIBLE precedent to set.

LaVar Ball; tastemaker, billion dollar brand builder, AAU coach of the year.

Celtics Continue the Trend and Blowout Wizards. Now One Win Away from Eastern Conference Finals

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It really is insane how neither the Celtics nor the Wizards can win a game against each other unless they’re at home. For whatever reason these teams are both 9-0 against each other when at home and 0-9 when on the road this season. And its not even close.

  • Game 1 (Celtics at home)
    • Celtics 123 – Wizards 111
  • Game 2 (Celtics at home)
    • Celtics 129 -Wizards 119 (OT)
  • Game 3 (Wizards at home)
    • Celtics 89 -Wizards 116
  • Game 4 (Wizards at home)
    • Celtics 102 -Wizards 121
  • Game 5 (Celtics at home)
    • Celtics 123 -Wizards 101

The closest game there was decided by 10 points with the largest deficit being a 27 point blowout by the Wizards in Washington. This series is literally defining home court advantage. Home court/home field advantage is such an exaggerated thing in sports most of the time. Sure in baseball you get the right of last refusal in the bottom of the 9th, but most sports it typically doesn’t make a huge difference. But my god am I glad the Celtics will host a potential Game 7 in Boston. It seems destined to get there. I don’t know how teams can routinely trade blowouts, you just don’t ever see it. The Celtics ran the Wizards out of the goddamn gym last night though and I think I know why.

Can’t let down Mr. Kraft and the entire Patriots organization when they’re sitting front row.

Avery Bradley had 25 in the first half for christ sake. The guy was on a roll, hip pointers and all, legit throwing up HEAT CHECKS.

Even Brad Stevens was having a good time. He’ll deny it, but the crowd was chanting “Fuck You Oubre” booing the shit out of Oubre at the line and after he bricked one, what does Stevens do? Sends Olynyk into the game.

And most importantly the Celtics did all of this with Isaiah Thomas having a TERRIBLE game. Just kidding, the dude scored 18 points, but typically the C’s have relied on 30, 40 and 50 point games from THA LITTLE GUY to bail them out.

Now Game 6 is gonna be fun. A total mystery wrapped in an enigma. Celtics could grind one out or they could get blown out again. But come on boys, lets wrap it up and move onto the Eastern Conference Finals so we can get ready for this shit show.

PS – Lets all remember that the Celtics finished with the No. 1 seed and are on the brink of reaching the Eastern Conference Finals AND have the best odds at landing the No. 1 pick in the NBA Draft this summer.

Is Kelly Olynyk a Dirty Player? Lets Break It Down.

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Had to address this whole “Kelly Olynyk is a dirty player” storyline thats been gaining steam over the last few days. Look has Olynyk been involved in some scuffles the past couple of years? Sure, but most of them are pretty innocuous. It’s not like he’s going out there socking dudes. For Draymond Green of all people to call Olynyk dirty though is just absurd.

The guy who literally goes around kicking dudes in the DICK is calling our very own Maple Jordan a dirty player.

 

Pot meet kettle. Sit the fuck down Draymond. Even Isaiah said as much when asked about it.

And then Draymond, being the dickhead that he is, clapped back on Isaiah.

Hopefully the C’s pull this Wizard series out and LeBron gets mono or something because I would LOVE to see this matchup in the Finals.

But, back to the point at hand. Is Olynyk a great player? No. Is he an awful player? No. Is he wildly frustrating at times? Yup. But do I think of him as a dirty player? Trying to be as objective as possible even as a Celtics fan, but I just don’t see it. Lets go through some of the more memorable incidents from the past couple of years.

The time Olynyk blew out Kevin Love’s shoulder in the playoffs:

I still think this is just a case of two gangly white guys getting tangled up and one of their noodle arms getting stuck. Love definitely didn’t see it that way though as he went on to rip Olynyk as a dirty player, thus starting the movement. My ruling? Not dirty. Drink more milk, Kevin.

Kelly Olynyk setting a pick on Kelly Oubre in Game 3

This play is literally a pick, probably more like one of the illegal moving screens that Kevin Garnett made famous, but a pick nonetheless. One that knocks Oubre on his ass. There’s nothing malicious or dirty here. Looks like a young guy in Oubre overreacting to a physical play before going up and tossing Olynyk, getting himself ejected. My ruling? Not dirty. Toughen up, Oubre.

I do have to give props to the Wizards owner Ted Leonsis though, definition of a ride or die boss.

 

Either way, here’s a FOUR MINUTE highlight video of Draymond Green dirty plays.

 

PS – Dirty or not dirty, this did make me laugh though.

Lonzo Ball’s First Big Baller Brand Shoe Sells Less Than 300 Pairs on Day 1

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The fact that less than 300 of the Big Baller Brand shoes were sold on day one is laugh out loud funny. After Nike, Adidas and Under Armour told Lavar Ball to go fuck himself he says fine I’ll do it myself. If you are comparing your son to Michael Jordan, Steph Curry and LeBron James you NEED to sell more than 300 pairs.

Now don’t get it twisted. Selling 300 of anything in a day by yourself is no small feat, I would be thrilled to sell 300 baseball cards in a day, but an NBA Draft Lottery Pick I am not. I mean if you do the math thats like $150K which is a pretty nice day at the office, but again Lonzo Ball is going to be throwing around $150K like they’re fun coupons in a couple of months.


But selling fucking sneakers for $500 takes some big balls, not to mention the $250 SANDALS.

Hell I still bide my time until some nice Nike’s come through Marshall’s so I can cop those things for like 60% off. So good luck selling any sneaker not called Yeezys for that kind of money Lavar, Lonzo or whoever the fuck is running that operation.

LeBron James Is Crying Because People Like Steph Curry More

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Business Insider – Though Stephen Curry has undergone a somewhat sudden rise to one of the NBA’s most popular players and the league’s first unanimous MVP, he apparently has work to do within the league. According to Marcus Thompson of Bay Area News Group, author of the newly released “Golden: The Miraculous Rise of Steph Curry,” Curry is not all that popular with some of the league’s biggest stars, including LeBron James.

This is some straight up Mean Girls shit. People rag on for LeBron for a lot of things. Some fair, some not so much. But, if this is true and LeBron and other guys around the league are pissy because Steph Curry is getting too much shine? Cry me a river dude. Steph basically reinvented the 3 pointer by draining shots from everywhere on the court. Consistently. Its not like the guy hasn’t ever won a title either. So its no wonder the guy gets a lot of hype.

Steph, you want LeBron and his flunkies to accept you? Well on Fridays they wear pink so shape up.

If you wanna clown on Steph Curry for something, make it the ugly ass shoes he puts out. Twitter engulfs in flames every time Steph drops a shoe now because people can’t wait to meme the latest Dad Bod 7’s.

The NBA is a meritocracy. Simple as that. If you suck then you won’t get the shine. If you are a transcendent player then you will “leapfrog” other guys. Especially aging stars. Pipe down Chris Paul. You’ve had about 85 State Farm commercials over the past few years. You’re not exactly getting put out to pasture.

Plus people like Steph because he’s relatable. He’s not an athletic freak, he’s not a 6’8″ man-child that can play all 5 positions on the court. He’s a pretty unassuming dude who dominates with incredible outside shooting and a great handle. People can relate to that. Everyone loves to watch LeBron, he’s one of the greatest players of all time. But he’s an absolute once in a generation athletic specimen who’s been that way since he was 15. People can’t relate to that.

Fucking Mugatu over here is bullshit because people like Steph more than him. I’VE BEEN TO SIX STRAIGHT FINALS. I INVENTED THE PIANO KEY NECKTIE!