If pitchers and catchers report to spring training, but no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

It’s one thing for fans to be down on a franchise coming off another last place finish, but after an offseason of inactivity, even the national media is smoking this team.

USA Today has the Red Sox sitting at No. 19 in their power rankings, which seems a bit high, but also denotes the ranking is tied to expected hopeful reinforcements being added to the squad. They also gave the Sox a D grade for their offseason so it any sense of optimism comes with a grain of salt.

Yahoo! Sports did not mince words in their prediction of the potential dumpster fire on Landsdowne:

Season prediction: The Red Sox are worse than bad; they are forgettable and irrelevant. Their unwillingness to spend predictably backfires, and the pivot from former head honcho Chaim Bloom to Breslow doesn’t change all that much. The lack of superstardom beyond Devers (and Casas) leads to dwindling interest in the team, and by August, the city of Boston is watching preseason football. Very few people watch the Netflix doc, which, given the circumstances of the season, paints the Red Sox as a disorganized jambalaya of chaos.

So yes the Red Sox are projected to finish last in the AL East by just about everyone, which would accomplish a rare feat for the Sox as that would make it four times in five years and six out of the last 10! If they were to finish in last place yet again, that would mean the Boston Red Sox, over the course of a DECADE, finished in last place 60 percent of the time.

That is absurd.

Compare that to the Orioles who are only going to get better as a team stocked with young talent that already won 101 games last year, the Yankees improved by trading for Juan Soto, the Rays are coming off a 99 win season and always seem to find a way to win 90+ games, and the Blue Jays snatched away one of Boston’s few good players, adding Justin Turner to a team that finished 11 games ahead of the Red Sox last season.

Meanwhile the Sox offseason consisted of whiffing on Shohei Ohtani, Yoshinobu Yamamoto, and second tier guys like Aaron Nola in free agency while not even kicking the tires on reigning Cy Young winner Blake Snell or World Series hero Jordan Montgomery, who as we all know has literally been hanging out in Boston all winter.

Are either one of Snell or Montgomery take it to the bank, guaranteed 30 starts and sub 3.50 ERA guys? No, but signing one of them would at least be signaling to the fan base that you’re going to at least try and be competitive and hopefully get some productive years out of players with legitimate track records.

Boston also traded its only representable defender in the outfield in Alex Verdugo to the Yankees, while letting productive veterans Turner and Adam Duvall walk for peanuts. They traded away oft injured, yet default ace Chris Sale in a salary dump for a second baseman in Vaughn Grissom who on his absolute best day profiles as a Dan Uggla cosplay. The Sox did bring in Lucas Giolito, who is now probably out for the season with a UCL tear, but this is the man who is best known for surrendering an absolutely preposterous 41 home runs in 2023. You wouldn’t hit that many dingers playing home run derby in Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball.

One of the highlights of the offseason was the Red Sox signing Liam Hendriks and the team Instagram pretending like it’s 2022 All-Star closer Liam Hendriks and not out (at least) through half of the 2024 season Liam Hendriks as he recovers from Tommy John.

Good grief.

Now you’ve even got Raffy Devers blatantly calling out ownership saying “everybody knows what we need.” Pointed comments from hands down your best player, in Year ONE of a $313M 10-year contract on, checks notes, FEBRUARY 20TH is an actual, legitimate problem.

Unsurprisingly John Henry declined to speak to the media at the start of Spring Training once again, which extends his vow of silence in official interviews all the way back to the post-Mookie Betts trade press conference. So Sam Kennedy once again stepped in as Henry’s stunt double, taking all the body blows. I was however shocked to hear Kennedy drop the nugget that yes ownership has in fact set parameters for new head of baseball ops Craig Breslow and he is operating within those parameters.

Breslow when asked why he didn’t sign any notable free agents in his first offseason:

What a wild, wild thing for ownership to let slip, essentially acknowledging huge expectations from the fan base, a vaunted history of success over the past 20 years, yet they will actually be shedding payroll. They actively cut payroll by 20% as if Boston isn’t a major market.

The Red Sox are going to be rolling the Six Million Dollar Man onto the field on April 9th

Rather than building for the short term and the long term in tandem, the Red Sox will instead rely on teenagers, minor leaguers, and top prospects all coming up through the system at around the same time (in the near to distant future) and all producing out of the gate like established big leaguers, and quickly becoming all-stars around the same time, and winning a World Series or four, all doing so before any of them can reach arbitration and ask for a raise.

Save us, Theo.