Sony is jumping on the cash grab bandwagon that is the mini “classic” console re-release. It really is nothing more than a shameless cash grab, but hey don’t hate the player. I have yet to pick any of these up because like a hoarder I still own half of these systems and can bust them out anytime I have a 6 pack of IPAs down in my parents basement over the holidays.

Nintendo has led the charge on this trend with the NES Classic Edition

and the Super Nintendo Classic Edition

And people went fucking BANANAS for these things. Legit sold out for months. Something about the nostalgia of video games you grew up playing coupled with the fact that they’re miniature drove people wild.

Meanwhile, SEGA is in the corner like “What the hell? We’ve been selling the same goddamn thing in Urban Outfitters for YEARS!”

Anyways, Sony is jumping into the fray with their own mini system, the Playstation Classic, and I have some questions.

There will be 20 games playable on the PS1 classic and as of right now only a handful have been announced.

“It’ll be out on December 3 in the US, Canada, Europe, Japan and Australia, and includes games like Final Fantasy VII, Jumping Flash, Ridge Racer Type 4, Tekken 3, and Wild Arms. There’ll be 20 bundled titles in total, but those five are the only ones announced at the moment.”

$100 bucks for Final Fantasy VII? Pass. Hard pass. Throw in Metal Gear Solid 1, Crash Bandicoot, Tomb Raider, maybe Spyro and then we can talk.

What else should we throw in there? Full disclosure I never owned the PS1. After N64 I went over to the Dreamcast because I’m a goddamn contrarian before coming back to the mainstream with the PS2.

So what other games does this mini system need to have for you to buy it?

Even though it looks like the biggest piece of shit ever created, I am still dying to play the 1997 release, Dragon Ball GT: Final Bout.

Give me all the gloriously bad games and I will somehow wind up giving you $100. But with the garbage thats been announced so far? Can’t do it guys. I gotta save those crisp bills for the N64 classic, which you just know is coming sooner than later.

I mean I’m currently balls deep in Zelda: Breath of the Wild on the Switch so its not like I need any more video games, but this is the only “classic” miniature system I’ve ever really been hyped for. Sure I have TWO N64 consoles in my apartment currently, but what I don’t have is a miniature version of it.