Boston.comBrad Marchand is never afraid to get under an opponent’s skin….The 29-year-old utilized what can best be described as an unorthodox method of trying to take Maple Leafs forward Leo Komarov out of his game. In the midst of some standard pushing and shoving, Marchand drew close to Komarov and even appeared to lick him.

Not since “Who shot J.R?” or “Is Tony Soprano dead?” has the world (Boston) been gripped by a question to this extent. Did Brad Marchand, aka Noseface Killah, the NHL’s greatest agitator, indeed lick an opponent in order to get in his head?

Now this is not only “unorthodox” but it is also extremely unsanitary. The last thing the B’s need is for Marchand to have to sit out with some sort of bacterial infection that stemmed from gland on gland contact. Lots of sweat in saliva in this equation folks and I’m sure there are alllll sorts of germs swimmin around in the sweat of a Toronto-livin, Russian hockey player.

To answer the question, there is only one alternative explanation which is that Marchand was shit-talking Komarov Green-Durant style and that the camera angle made him appear closer and much more licky. That’s really it. If I was Marchand’s Charlie Kelly and I had a background in opponent licking law, that would be my only out.

In reality however, let’s be honest, yes, 63 licked his opponent. And yes he did it to psych him the fuck the out. But he didn’t do it for himself. He didn’t do it for the team. He did it for us, the city of Boston, and for the chance to bring us home a 7th Stanley Cup. That is why our guy licked another grown man.

Playoff hockey man, there’s nothing like it.

About Joey Ballgame

I'd like to take this chance to apologize to absolutely nobody. Views from the 617. Primarily MMA and pop culture takes from down in the rabbit hole. Sports straight out of left field.
This entry was posted in Boston, Bruins, NHL and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s