The Tampa Bay Rays Are Exploring Becoming a Two…City…Team?

Upon first reading this story, I immediately looked at the calendar on my computer screen. It is not April Fools Day.

I then asked the Google if it was some sort of April Fools Day in any other part of the world. It would appear it is not.

I then scrolled Jeff Passan’s timeline to see if he showed any signs of mental illness or drug abuse. Now neither are a laughing matter, but either would explain such an outlandish tweet. Nada.

So this is real folks. The Tampa Bay, nee Devil, Rays are indeed investigating if it’s viable to become the baseball equivalent of most north of the Mason Dixon-living recent retirees. Winters through spring in Florida. Summers back to the real world to see the kids and Grand kids. The best of both worlds.

This whole plan, if I understand it right, solves two problems while, in the opinion of this blogger, creating another. The first problem it solves is the fact that the team has really never been fully embraced by Tampa and things are never going to get any better. There just won’t ever be that kind of demand for a pro baseball team in that city. I mean hell, a pro hockey team does better there. But how do you ramp up demand? By cutting supply (BA in Econ here nd nd). So you go from offering the residents of Tampa 40ish games instead of 80ish and suddenly you may just see a rise in interest. You might also see them completely forgetting about the Rays but hey, that’s the risk.

The second problem being solved here is that you give the city of Montreal A FUCKING BASEBALL TEAM AGAIN. While never being a money maker, Montreal’s baseball fans loved their Expos and were crushed to see them go. They are akin to us “Arrested Development” fans back in the day. So while the ‘Expos aren’t coming back (although some sick throwbacks might be) the city of Montreal might get baseball again. Baseball is the most nostalgia-inducing of all pro sports, bar none, so if a city getting a team again after like, 20 years without one doesn’t give you the feels you’re heartless.

Now, the problem this creates is that I don’t really know how two completely different fanbases coexist. I don’t know how the team pulls this off. I just picture that oft-posted cartoon of two Spiderman’s pointing at each other. Will they get along? Will they argue? Can you launch a marketing campaign aimed at two cities at once? Don’t even get me at how much capital expenditure you purpose towards each city and why. The logistics there are just tough.

Luckily, pro sports franchises NEVER FUCK MAJOR LOCATION-centric MOVES UP. Like ever. So Im sure if this gets green lit everything will go smoothly. If not we’re down a franchise for a year or two until Jon Gruden is also coaching the AL West’s newest team the Las Vegas Greased Poles.

-Joey B

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