Phillip Rivers Just Phillip Rivers’d Melvin Gordon

ProFootballTalk“They’re going to get a lot of work,” Rivers said, via the Los Angeles Times. “It certainly is a deep position for us, and those guys all love to play and work hard. We love Melvin, but we’re going to go with what we’ve got. It’s a pretty dang good group.”

I know what I’m about to say is not a popular opinion in the upper right-hand quadrant of the United States. I know we had quite the little rivalry with the formerly San Diego Chargers in the mid-to-late 2000’s. LT even talked some shit about our professionalism, giving way to a decent amount of New England hatred for the greatest back of our time, and maybe ever. I also know we don’t take kindly to cocky, fiery athletes that are not our own. It’s a contraction we own and even feed off of.

But I fucking love Phillip Rivers.

From his uber passionate style of play to his toughness – I believe it was the 06′ AFC title game he played with a torn ACL – to his weird ass hobby of having a thousand kids to him being the most underrated quarterback ever in my opinion. I just fuckin love the guy.

Most of all I love that Phillip can talk. That. Shit. Whether it’s about an opponent or someone in his organization. Man woman or child. Directly, or in this case, in the style of a passive aggressive brick, he is the best to do it of his generation. He reminds me A TON of Josh Beckett in this way. I’m good, this is the way I feel, so fuck you. That’s it.

And so here we are. Phillip Rivers has had a very successful individual and, for the most part, team-related career with countless teammates playing a role. That includes the best of the best and the just ok of backfield-mates. So do you think for one second he’s going to just let it slide that some hotshot RB is going to hold out and not let the guy know that Ol’ Papa Rivs considers him 1000% replaceable? Naht Toooooday. Not in this lifetime.

I actually can imagine this was the last thing Melvin Gordon had to consider before he decided to hold out. “There is no going back with Phillip. Him and his 23 kids are going to have my ass.” And he was right. He was always right.

The hardest part of digesting this whole situation is deciding what is the funniest aspect. It’s one of two:

1.) That you KNEW Phillip Rivers was going to speak on it, and even knowing so, it didn’t take away from how magical what he said was. He fucking delivered in spades.
2.) This is probably a solvable situation and that means Gordon is going to have to come back into that locker room, look Rivers in the eyes, and either say absolutely nothing or maybe even apologize. That’s his team kid.

So hate me if you want, o readers. I’ll be a Phillip Rivers guy as long as he’s slangin balls with the weirdest motion this side of Nantucket and cussing out anyone and everyone he sees fit. He’s just #goodforforball.
-Joey B

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