Red Sox

A Boston Resident Has Been Diagnosed With…..Measles?

Boston.comA Boston resident was diagnosed with measles Sunday, the city’s Public Health Commission said Wednesday in a statement….. “This is the first confirmed case of measles in a Boston resident since 2013.’’

Thanks a WHOOOOOOOLEEEEE FUCKING LOT JENNY MCCARTHY. Measles. We talkin bout measles. How does one contract measles you ask? I have no fucking clue. Well actually I assume by making contact with someone with measles. How does that happen in 2019? I have no idea. All I know is Al Gore did not invent the internet and give SJWs the platform to form a massive misfit army just to have them killed off by diseases thought eradicated in 1882 (or thereabouts).

But in all seriousness, I’m actually impressed that today’s medical doctors even know how the hell to identify and treat something like measles. Like ya, open heart surgery is absolute physiological poetry in motion. But doctors today are trained in modern techniques to perform such operations. Identify and set a course of treatment for a disease that Oliver Twist probably survived four times? Now that’s something to talk about. I would be more susceptible to imagining a conversation like this happening:

Doc 1: I have no idea what this kid has.
Doc2: I looked it up  in that book ol’ book we got. It’s measles.
Doc1: Jesus chriminity! Well good job with the research. Now how do we cure him?
Doc2: Not a fuckin clue.

Yet somehow in the greatest medical city (???????????I think???????????) in the world these guys were able to put it together. That’s something.

Quickly back to these asshole anti-vaxer parents though as it obviously they’re fault this happened. What a stupid fucking movement, even at a time where stupid fucking movements like the flat earthers exists. “O I’m not gonna vaccinate my kid there are harmful chemicals.” Well ya, there’s also the sun, car exhaust, and fluoride in our water so unless you are catching rain and feeding it to your bubble kid through a tube you’re shit out of luck there. “But Jenny McCarthy’s kid has autism.” Look it’s been said by smarter people than me but  being vaccinated didn’t give Jenny McCarthy’s kid autism. Being Jenny McCarthy’s kid did.

So here we are. In 2019. The year I’ve already described as full-blow “Idiocracy”. Add this to the list. Measles. Great.

-Joey B.

Categories: Red Sox

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