“Samson Simson, I STICK BY MY STORY!”
The Ball Brothers Put Up BUCKETS in Lithuania, Score 60 Combined Points
Yahoo – Two days after being held scoreless in their Lithuanian League play debut, the adventures of LaMelo and LiAngelo Ball continued on Monday as the pair got back into a groove and delivered the best performances of their brief professional careers. In Vytautus’ 130-93 win over BC Lietuvos, the Ball brothers delivered an offensive tour de force right out of their Chino Hills days by producing nearly half of Vytautus’ scoring total. LaMelo scored a game-high 31 points, dished 11 assists and recorded five steals. LiAngelo did most of his damage in the low post and at the rim, but wasn’t far behind LaMelo’s team-high, chipping in 29 points of his own.
At first glance this looks like a great sports story; the Ball brothers scored a combined 60 points and seem like they’re growing into bonafide Big Ballers. Until you see this:
“The Big Baller Brand Challenge Games have been good to the Ball brothers. The Big Baller Brand Challenge Games is a five-game exhibition that was created by the Ball family patriarch in order to get his two sons more playing time on their Lithuanian club and to build their confidence.”
Get the fuck out of here. LaVar is now setting up Lithuanian tournaments to get his sons more PT? Even the refs are wearing BBB branded jerseys. I’m legitimately not kidding, look:
Apparently this game was against a “second-division team” though. So as the infamous Winston Wolf would say:
It is cool seeing two brothers throwing each other alley oops like this though. Who knows where and when you want the ball better than your own brosef?
LaMelo Ball tosses the alley-oop to his brother LiAngelo 🔥
(🎥 via @overtime) pic.twitter.com/p4VYk3vE1M
— Def Pen Sports (@DefPenSports) January 15, 2018
But then, again, you see shit like this. Up 40+ points LaMelo tries to throw an alley oop to himself off the glass (and fails miserably).
LaMelo Ball already has 31 points (Gelo has 29) so he tried getting just a LITTLE too cute on the fastbreak. #BallIsLife pic.twitter.com/sifT2WT8Wm
— Josh Sánchez (@jnsanchez) January 15, 2018
This is the AAU/Lavar Ball-ification of sports. If some kid tried that on me in a blowout I would absolutely sweep the leg. Some 35 year old pissed off player that never made it in the NBA is going to snuff one of these kids for antics like this.
All in all, 60 points is 60 points so its fun to actually see these guys put up some buckets after what seems like 2 years of shit talking from the dad. Do it against an actual team in an actual game not sponsored by your father though and I’ll consider myself impressed. Until then?
UCF is Claiming to Have Won the National Championship Despite Not Making the Playoffs and Finishing the Year Ranked 12th in the Country
ESPN – UCF athletic director Danny White said Wednesday that the program has decided to claim a national championship and will place a championship banner inside Spectrum Stadium to recognize its undefeated 2017 season. The Knights beat Auburn 34-27 in the Chick-Fil-A Peach Bowl to cap a 13-0 season, finishing as the only undefeated team in college football. But because UCF doesn’t play in a Power 5 conference, it entered the bowl game ranked No. 12 by the College Football Playoff selection committee and was not given an opportunity to play for the national championship. Since the victory on New Year’s Day, UCF football has changed its Twitter display name to “2017 National Champions” with a logo designed to match.
I love this move. Undefeated Season? Check. Big bowl game win? Check. Opportunity to compete for a championship in the College Football Playoffs? Nope. “Welp, fuck this then we’ll just declare ourselves National Champs.”
This is the problem you inevitably run into with College Football. Sure, is the current 4 team playoff format better than the BCS computer ranking system of the AP Polls? Of course. But there will still be teams like this in the top 10, 15, 20 that feel like they got shafted. And going undefeated but not being given a chance to play against the big boys like Bama and Clemson is tough to swallow.
The NCAA commissioner smacked UCF down real quick though basically saying they’re schedule was too soft to rank them in the Top 4 despite their undefeated season. He’s not wrong. You wanna make the playoffs? Play a harder schedule and don’t beat up on teams like Eastern Carolina, Austin Peay, UConn, and Temple. You cannot sit here with a straight face and tell me you could even find AUSTIN PEAY on a map. Murderers Row that is not.
But UCF knew all of this and still said “nope we are the champions.” That is the ultimate George Costanza move and you have to respect it. Its like the time the Jerk Store bombed and it wasn’t until he was driving home later that a killer comeback hit him.
Respect the utter refusal to accept things as they are. Keep doing you, UCF.
*According to ESPN Stats & Information, UCF is the 10th team in the BCS era (since 1998) to finish the season undefeated and not win the national title.
Totally Uninformed Bowl Game Gambling Picks – Round 5
I can’t believe I picked Boston College. I knew better. Again, it’s clear that I’ve learned nothing this month.
This is starting to get serious and I’m starting to get worried. Round 4 of my picks, Wednesday in particular, was another rough outing. We’re going to take it one day at a time from here on out. And because I’m just throwing darts at this point, no explanation of my picks is warranted. They’re getting tougher to defend anyways.
Round 4 (1-6) / Overall (5-16)
MILITARY BOWL – Virginia vs. Navy – 1:30 p.m. ET VIRGINIA +1.5
CAMPING WORLD BOWL – No. 19 Oklahoma State vs. No. 22 Virginia Tech – 5:15 p.m. ET
OKLAHOMA STATE -5.5
ALAMO BOWL – No. 13 Stanford vs. No. 15 TCU – 9 p.m. ET STANFORD +3
HOLIDAY BOWL – No. 16 Michigan State vs. No. 18 Washington State – 9 p.m. ET MICHIGAN STATE -2
Totally Uninformed Bowl Game Gambling Picks – Round 3
It was a very rough week for my picks, no two ways about it. The favorites went 4-1 and I picked four dogs. Even worse, none of the games were even close. No game this week was closer than three scores. The average margin of victory was 34.2 points.
Luckily, we’re only a quarter of the way through bowl season. There’s still time to turn this ship around. And this week reminded me that favorites are favored for a reason. Just like March Madness, you need to pick a few upsets but you can’t pick three 14 seeds to win in the first round. I won’t be afraid to go with the chalk more frequently the rest of the way.
With three games scheduled for Saturday and one for Sunday night, here are my picks for the remaining games through Christmas.
Record in Round 2 (0-5) / Overall (2-8)
BIRMINGHAM BOWL – Texas Tech vs. South Florida – Dec. 23, 12 p.m. ET on
I’ll go with one of the highest scoring offenses in the country here. USF -2
ARMED FORCES BOWL – Army vs. San Diego State – Dec. 23, 3:30 p.m. ET
No line on this game but I’ll pick the Aztecs to win. SDSU
DOLLAR GENERAL BOWL – Appalachian State vs. Toledo – Dec. 23, 7 p.m. ET
Appalachian State lost to UMass this year. TOLEDO -8
HAWAI’I BOWL – Fresno State vs. Houston – Dec. 24, 8:30 p.m. ET
Boise State proved me right, so I’ll show some more love to the Mountain West.
FRESNO STATE +2
LaVar Ball Starting His Own Basketball League to Compete With the NCAA
ESPN – LaVar Ball said Wednesday that he’s launching a basketball league for nationally-ranked players who have graduated from high school but don’t want to go to college. Ball’s Junior Basketball Association, which he says is fully funded by his Big Baller Brand, plans to pay the lowest-ranked player a salary of $3,000 a month and the best player $10,000 a month, Ball said. Ball is looking for 80 players to fill 10 teams that will seek to play at NBA arenas in Los Angeles, Dallas, Brooklyn and Atlanta.“Getting these players is going to be easy,” Ball told ESPN. “This is giving guys a chance to get a jump start on their career, to be seen by pro scouts, and we’re going to pay them because someone has to pay these kids.”
The modern day Vince McMahon just continues to roll along with his idea du jour; an alternative basketball league to compete with the NCAA. It’s geared at top players who don’t want to go to college, or ya know shit holes like Lithuania. Ya think LaMelo and LiAngelo might prefer playing in this league rather than taking trains and ferrys to Baltic League games in Kiev?
I gotta admit, this guy is COCKY, and it is contagious. Because on its face, its not a bad idea. If the NBA is so stuck on its “One and Done” rule (which it may actually get rid of sooner than later) then whats the point of a guy going to Duke for 8 months and showing up to a handful of classes posing as a college student like he’s in Never Been Kissed?
The NCAA is more corrupt than a North Korean election so a little competition to maybe keep them on their toes can’t hurt. Having a league that follows pro-style rules makes a ton of sense too.
“Ball said the rules of his league will follow those of the NBA instead of college — 12-minute quarters and a pro 3-point line.”
Having wildly different rules for college and the pros has never made any sense to me. Especially when leagues like the NBA and the NFL use the NCAA as a de facto minor league system. Why make the 3 point line deeper after turning pro instead of just having players get used to it in college and judge them all accordingly? Why do college football players only need to get one foot down for a catch, but in the NFL you need two?
Quotes like this though don’t really help the perception that this is just all a marketing scheme to further LaVar’s own brand.
“Ball said since Big Baller Brand is promoting the league, all players must agree to wear only Big Baller Brand products, including BBB shoes on the court. “We’ll give it to them all,” Ball said. “They’ll be wearing our uniform, our shoes, our T-shirts and our hoodies.”
Don’t get me wrong, nobody thinks LaVar Ball is here to save the manatees. The honesty and transparency is refreshing when compared to the toxic hypocrisy that is the NCAA, but in order to succeed this will need to be more than the latest example of LaVar Ball hawking garbage at an exorbitant price.
So if you’re a high school grad that doesn’t wanna play overseas and risk going to Chinese prison for swiping some sweet shades, then the Big Baller Brand league is for you. Ya know until the NBA inevitably gets rid of the “One and Done” rule, then this league will collapse faster than an IKEA kitchen table.
Totally Uninformed Bowl Game Gambling Picks – Round 1
College football bowl season kicks off tomorrow with five games on the docket. This year’s bowl season will feature 40 games, culminating with the College Football Playoff National Championship game on January 8.
We here at The 300s aren’t experts on all 130 Division I Football Bowl Subdivision teams, but we have wasted more Saturday afternoons in October than we care to admit. So if your fantasy football season was a train wreck, jump on our train as we pick every game this bowl season. After all, what the hell else will there be to watch on TV the day after Christmas? Might as well make things interesting.
(All lines are from from the Westgate Las Vegas.)
NEW ORLEANS BOWL Troy vs. North Texas
Troy has won six games in a row and is 5-1 away from home this season. Meanwhile North Texas is 3-4 on the road and coming off a loss in their conference championship game. TROY -7
CURE BOWL Georgia State vs. Western Kentucky
Bit of a toss up here, so I’ll go with the team with the better passing attack. WESTERN KENTUCKY +6.5
LAS VEGAS BOWL Oregon vs. No. 25 Boise State
The Mountain West champs are getting points. Also, Oregon went 0-3 against ranked teams this season, never losing by less than three touchdowns. BOISE STATE +7
NEW MEXICO BOWL Marshall vs. Colorado State
Marshall has lost four of tits last five games and has to travel across the country to take on Colorado State. COLORADO STATE -5.5
CAMELLIA BOWL Middle Tennessee vs. Arkansas State
Arkansas State is coming off a tough loss but is the better team. ARKANSAS STATE -4
LaVar Ball Continues Quest to Ruin His Kids Lives, Pulls LiAngelo Ball from UCLA
TMZ – It’s a stunning move … LiAngelo Ball will no longer be on the UCLA basketball team and, in fact, he will not be a student at UCLA … because his father, LaVar Ball, is removing him from the institution … TMZ Sports has learned. As you know, LiAngelo was indefinitely suspended from the team after he stole from several stores during a trip to China. LiAngelo was placed on house arrest but was sprung after Trump and others went to bat for him.
It was crazy enough when LaVar Ball took his youngest kid, LaMelo, out of high school. But at least that could kind of be defended by saying hey the family is rich and famous and he wants the kid to travel and train full-time while not being bothered by things like “studying or “learning to play with teammates.” Pulling LiAngelo Ball out of UCLA? Thats fucking nonsensical. LiAngelo, while dumb enough to shoplift in China, is still a college student AKA a goddamn adult. So pulling him out of school and off of a promising D1 basketball team is a lot different than just yanking your 15 year old son out of high school.
Its just another delusional move from the guy who thinks he can somehow mold all 3 of his kids into elite NBA athletes by himself alone. And this part?
We’re told LaVar believes the suspension was unfair, especially since the charges were dropped. LaVar’s people tell TMZ Sports the famous dad thinks, “There’s no need to break down a kid’s spirit for making a mistake.”
The kid was shoplifting in fucking CHINA. He’s lucky he’s not in Chinese prison still. I think a little suspension from UCLA was a pretty fair response.
Real question though, what’s he do with LiAngelo? Just take the time off to train? If I’m an NBA executive I’m not going near the kid who didn’t even play a game in college and just expect him to jump right into the NBA. I would say he could go play ball overseas, but if I’m him I’m probably never leaving the United States again. Part of me can’t help but think its another storyline for their reality show as LaVar looks to overtake the Kardashians for Reality TV royalty. So this should be an interesting one to watch play out.
Donald Trump Does NOT Like Getting UCLA Basketball Players Out of Chinese Prison Without a Hearty Thank You
If it weren’t for the Donald, LiAngelo Ball and his UCLA teammates could be in a Chinese labor camp breaking rocks for the next 5-10 years.
Do you think the three UCLA Basketball Players will say thank you President Trump? They were headed for 10 years in jail!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 15, 2017
Or at least thats how he wants people to see it.
Before we get into this, if there is one piece of advice to offer LiAngelo and his teammates, especially when traveling to dictatorial countries, it’s this:
While it has reached completely fucking preposterous levels of reality TV storylines, it is equally hilarious that the fucking President of the United States had to throw in a good word to the President of China to get this process moving along. China was never gonna imprison famous American teenagers for 10 years, but then again it is China so you never know. I distinctly remember just how difficult it was for Jack Bauer to get back from China. It even required a prisoner swap, so you mess with China at your own risk.
But Donnie is out there just wheeling and dealing getting shit done. And while actual things may not be actually getting done, at least the UCLA basketball team is whole again. But don’t you dare think you’re gonna fly home without publicly thanking the Donald for saving your bacon.
Although Lil Yachty would disagree with that.
Lil Yachty: ‘F**k Donald Trump,’ LiAngelo Ball’s Free ‘Cause He’s Rich https://t.co/woYHhKwjNa
— TMZ Sports (@TMZ_Sports) November 14, 2017
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
UPDATE: The players acknowledged and thanked Donald Trump for helping get them out of China, so we can all resume our lives now.
Locked Up Abroad – UCLA Basketball Edition
ESPN – Three UCLA men’s basketball players — including LiAngelo Ball, the younger brother of Los Angeles Lakers rookie Lonzo Ball — were released on bail early Wednesday morning in Hangzhou, China, after being arrested for allegedly shoplifting Tuesday afternoon, a source told ESPN.
The three players, a group that also includes freshmen Cody Riley and Jalen Hill, were questioned about allegedly stealing sunglasses from a Louis Vuitton store next to the team’s hotel in Hangzhou, where the Bruins had been staying before leaving for Shanghai on Wednesday…
Ball, Riley and Hill were taken to the police station in Hangzhou, where they were kept for a number of hours. UCLA representatives, including coach Steve Alford, were at the police station along with the players.
Ball, Riley and Hill were released around 4 a.m. Wednesday and were staying at a luxury hotel in Hangzhou along with a UCLA representative, according to a source. They are being required by Hangzhou police to remain at the hotel until the legal process is over, the source said.
How is this story not front page news? No mention of this story on the New York Times homepage or even the Los Angeles Times homepage, and just a small link on the ESPN homepage. Three American college basketball players were locked up overnight in China. One of the players that was locked up is a member of the Ball family, the Kardashians of basketball. And oh yeah, the President of the United States just happens to be in China at the same time. This has all the makings of international incident.
It will be a while before all the details about what happened in the Louis Vuitton store come out but it’s unlikely that this case will play out like Jameis Winston crab leg incident. It was widely reported yesterday that the three players could face up to 10 years in prison, if convicted. A plea bargain including community service is probably not on the table.
Here’s what the U.S. Department of State website has to say about the Chinese legal system:
The Chinese legal system can be opaque and the interpretation and enforcement of local laws arbitrary. The judiciary does not enjoy independence from political influence. U.S. citizens traveling or residing in China should be aware of varying levels of scrutiny to which you will be subject from Chinese local law enforcement and state security.
While China might not be North Korea, it’s not Canada either. Was this not fully explained to the players before they got on the plane? They’re out of jail for the time being but even if they are not charged or convicted they might not get out of China for a while. Season 2 of Ball in the Family could be set in China.
On a side note, hopefully the NCAA will be forced to answer why they thought it was a good idea for a college basketball game to be played in China in the first place. Not every school should have to schedule games like the Ivy League, which only schedules conference match ups for Fridays and Saturdays, but it would be nice if they at least didn’t openly mock the “student-athlete” system. A week-long trip to another continent in the middle of the semester can’t be great for a student-athlete’s studies. Especially if they get locked up by a communist government.
The 300s 