I feel like the word “epic” is thrown around a little too cavalierly these days. Getting black out in Faneuil Hall and then getting drunk pizza is not epic, Jimmy. BUT, ringing up a tab that tops SIX FIGURES definitely qualifies for that. Hell Gronk almost equaled what the entire Bruins team spent drinking at Foxwoods after winning the goddamn Stanley Cup in 2011. To rack up $102K at the bar, I’m gonna assume there wasn’t a lot of Miller Lites floating around.
A post shared by Erik Lorch || ⒻⒾⓃⓀ (@finkshotit) on Jun 19, 2017 at 9:42am PDT
Kylie Jenner makes like $300K for a promoted Instagram post for christ’s sake. So, when you think about it, its criminal to even let Gronk open his wallet for this one. Sure, take a few grand to fix the holes in the dry wall and steam clean the carpets and couches. But other than that you just thank Gronk for coming to fucking Connecticut to party and call it even.
Yahoo – Vince Young deserved credit for doing whatever it took to get back into football. In his case, it was a trip to the Canadian Football League. However, Young’s body betrayed him. According to the Houston Chronicle, Young’s agent Leigh Steinberg said Young tore his hamstring during training camp and was cut by the Saskatchewan Roughriders. He was due to be out four-to-six weeks.
Well this is probably curtains on Vince Young’s football playing career and its a sad day for me. Was always a huge Vinsanity guy, mainly because he was unstoppable in Madden 08 running the shotgun.
But the guy was also insanely fun to watch at Texas and for a short time in Tennessee before that train went off the rails. Looking back, Jeff Fisher coupled with VY was a disaster waiting to happen. The king of 8-8 probably wanted nothing to do with Vince scrambling around making shit happen. He wanted to run it out of the I-formation and just miss the playoffs as he’s done his whole career.
I can’t help but get my antenna up though with Vince’s agent announcing the injury at the same time he’s getting cut. Maybe, its to spare Vince the embarrassment of getting cut by a team in Canada or maybe he actually did destroy his hamstring, but either way its the end of an era.
I know he had a role with the University of Texas in the past so hopefully he gets a gig with the football team there if he’s truly done playing. Because if anyone watched that NFL Films doc with him and Matt Leinart “The 2006 Rose Bowl: A Football Life” he did not look great. Especially compared to Leinart who benefits from truly not giving a shit that he also bombed in the NFL. You were a college football legend in motherfucking TEXAS. Own that shit, Vince.
A younger version of myself would freak out at the prospect of my franchise quarterback appearing on the cover of Madden because dudes used to routinely get injured after landing the cover. But TB12 put that to rest real quick with a few simple demonstrations.
Smashed mirror? No problem? Walk under a ladder? Get that shit out of my face.
Lets get scientific about it though and break it down year by year, going back an arbitrary number of years because Madden 03 was the first Madden I actually had. On the PC no less. You ever try running go routes on a 12 inch computer screen? Holy hell, but I digress. Onto the list, with some help from Digital Trends.
2003: Marshall Faulk has one of his worst years ever and its the beginning of the end of his career.
CURSE: In full effect
2004: Michael Vick fractures his fibula and misses the first 11 games of the season
CURSE: 100%
2005: Ray Lewis has a down year, but nothing curse worthy…he did tear his hamstring the following year though.
CURSE: Meh
2006: Donovan McNabb was plagued by a groin injury before tearing his ACL later in the year.
CURSE: You bet
2007: Shaun Alexander broke his foot in Week 3 that season.
CURSE: Prevails once again
2008: Vince Young was plagued by quad injuries all year before being replaced by KERRY COLLINS.
CURSE: Continues to cruise
2009: Brett Favre played pretty well actually before injuring his shoulder down the stretch and tanking his (and the Jets) effectiveness.
CURSE: Yea, not even including Brett’s cell phone pic troubles
2010: Larry Fitzgerald/Troy Polamalu – Fitz actually had a career year, but Polamalu injured his MCL, missed a month and then eventually injured his PCL as well.
CURSE: 50/50 split but still yes
2011: Drew Brees stayed healthy but threw twice as many picks as the year prior and the Saints lost to the first team to ever make the playoffs with a losing record in Seattle that year.
CURSE: Not reallyyy
2012: Peyton Hillis came out of nowhere to have a huge year to land the cover of Madden only to battle illness and hamstring issues all season. Rushed for under 600 yards, the Browns let him walk after the season and that was a wrap on Hillis’ career.
CURSE: Yup, you sunk my battleship
2013: Calvin Johnson set the single season record for receiving yards soo he did alright.
CURSE: Nope, Megatron shatters it
2014: Adrian Peterson battled through a foot injury all year long and the Vikings only won 10 games.
CURSE: Yessir
2015: Richard Sherman had a great season and stayed healthy…but they did lose to the Patriots in the Super Bowl.
CURSE: Nah, but we did get this legendary GIF out of Sherman’s season
2016: Odell Beckham Jr. has 1,400+ receiving yards and 13 TDs and is named to this second consecutive Pro Bowl.
CURSE: No shot
2017: Rob Gronkowski played only 8 games last season as missed the first game of the year with a hamstring injury, then got on a roll, but ultimately hurt his back in Week 7 against Seattle and missed the rest of the season.
CURSE: Put the smackdown on Gronk
So by my scientific count, that makes 10 instances of the Madden Curse wrecking a guy’s season since Madden 2003.
But, hey this is Tom Brady we’re talking about. The 5 time Super Bowl champ who continues to get better like a goddamn fine wine. As long as he’s go his avocado ice cream and his shady health guru Alex Guerrero and his TB12 voodoo magic, I think Brady will continue to roll. You think the Madden Curse and mother nature can stop this specimen?
I think not.
PS – If something does happen to Tom this year I am going to go full Brian Mills on everyone that has ever worked at EA Sports.
NY Daily News – The WNBA is entering the daily fantasy sports market. The league announced a partnership with FanDuel on Thursday — the first time a women’s professional sports league will be available in one-day fantasy games…The site will also have its normal offerings of daily fantasy contests in which people can win money by picking a lineup of WNBA players and pitting them against other players. The WNBA is hoping this new venture brings more fans to the league, which starts its 21st season this weekend.
I am so, so, so IN on WNBA daily fantasy. This is it guys, this is how I build my empire. I was late to the party on NFL, NBA, NHL even Golf and MMA have daily fantasy now. But WNBA? I am diving in head first. Not to mention I could buy courtside seats with my winnings for like $35 right?
The fact that you can bet on a game at halftime is absurd enough, but now I can literally lay my hard earned cash on the table building my fantasy team around Skyler Diggins? Is a dunk worth extra points? Its gotta be right? Shore up the end of my bench with a savvy vet like Diana Taurasi. I think she still plays?
What happens when Candace Parker gets pregnant though? That could potentially tank my season. Shit, that could actually be the FanDuel commercial. Redraft your team every day so unexpected pregnancies don’t ruin your WNBA fantasy season!
Joe West is the ultimate dickhead umpire in all of baseball. The definition of inserting yourself into the game. People legitimately call him Cowboy Joe West for christ’s sake. Welp, even former players are still shitting on Joe West for being a terrible umpire.
Umpires and refs are a job where if you know the guy’s name he’s probably not doing a great job. Joe West, Angel Hernandez, Tim Donaghy, Walt Anderson etc. Except for Ed Hochuli. Everyone knows Ed Hochuli because he’s a boss.
I didn’t really buy into Marshawn Lynch coming out of retirement to play in Oakland. Guy legit seems to be enjoying retirement and not dealing with smashing into 300 pound men all day. But now I hear that Marshawn Lynch is interested in joining the Patriots? I am officially woke. I am back on Marshawn Lynch Watch because the Patriots are looking to build something special. They are turning over every rock to build the best team in the NFL. So whats to say the Pats don’t swoop in and get a deal done? This is the Not Fucking Around Crew.
Sure Lynch saying he’s interested in a team is not exactly the same thing as a team offering a guy a contract, but this is a wild rumor if nothing else. Blount still hasn’t resigned with the team and they didn’t offer Adrian Peterson a contract. They also don’t have a pick in the NFL Draft until No. 72 overall, but the Pats don’t typically draft runningbacks high anyways. With all that being said, there is a gaping void for a power back just waiting to be filled.
Am I a little hesitant about bringing on a guy who last played in 2015 when he rushed for 417 yards? Yup. Did he also destroy my fantasy football season that year? Yup. But if its Marshawn Lynch or LeGarrette Blount, Lynch is a clear upgrade. Lynch will be 31 by the time next season starts so this would clearly be a short term engagement.
Now all you need to do is convince Pete Carroll to trade Beast Mode to the exact team that had every person in the world clowning him after the Super Bowl a couple years ago. Simple enough task, I suppose.
Jeff Howe, who reported the rumor, calls it a long shot if anything, but it would definitely be fun to have Lynch on this Pats team. And for people saying he might not get along with the Patriot Way? Uhh, does anyone remember this dude’s press conferences?
Pretty sure he’d do just fine not saying shit to the media. Now for the obligatory highlight video of Marshawn Lynch dominating people with a football in his hands. Boss.
CBS Sports – The Patriots’ whirlwind of big offseason moves may not be over yet. After being mentioned in recent trade rumors involving Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman, it appears that the team’s interest in his services is still alive. The Boston Herald’s Jeff Howe tweeted on Wednesday that the Patriots still have “some” interest in trading for Sherman. Howe was following up on candid comments made by Seahawks GM John Schneider regarding Seattle’s own interest in moving the super-talented (three-time All-Pro) but expensive ($11 million base salary) 29-year-old cornerback.
As everyone knows, there have been rumors floating around that the Patriots are interested in acquiring the Seahawks shutdown corner Richard Sherman. I would love to have a guy like Sherman on this Pats team, especially if they are debating dealing Malcolm Butler. Now lets unpack this conspiracy theory with everything else thats been happening the past week.
The Patriots hosted free agent Adrian Peterson on Monday, which was Peterson’s FIRST free agent visit of the offseason. Peterson obviously has his own baggage after abusing his toddler and getting suspended by the Vikings. So not surprisingly the free agent market has been a bit slow for a 32 year old RB coming off knee surgery with that kind of shit going on.
When news broke of Peterson’s visit to the Patriots pretty much everyone asked why? Runningback isn’t exactly at the top of the Pats list of needs, especially not one embroiled in a case like his. Even more so after Jonathan Kraft ripped the dude on the radio. So what could it be? As some have speculated, were the Patriots maybe doing his agent Ben Dogra a solid? Bring in AP for a visit to get the ball rolling and drum up some interest in the RB around the rest of the league? Sure, maybe, but still doesn’t quite explain it.
Then the Sherman rumors come out that he might be available via trade and the Patriots were one of the teams inquiring. And as Scott Zolack mentioned on the air today; who is Richard Sherman’s agent? Ben Dogra. Yes, the same Dogra that represents Adrian Peterson.
So sure its still an NFL trade for a superstar and the Pats would need to give up something to get something, but maybe Dogra helps steer a potential Sherman trade to the Pats after Belichick helped drum up interest on Peterson.
ESPN – A 10-hour fan vote by an indoor football team in Utah asking whether the team should sign former NFL defensive end Greg Hardy ended in a “no” Thursday morning. Results on the team’s app, which fans use to vote to call plays during games for the Salt Lake Screaming Eagles, of the Indoor Football League, was a virtual 50-50 tie, but the team announced Thursday that 50.1 percent of voters were against Hardy being offered a contract.
This is phenomenal. The very people that scumbag Greg Hardy has never cared about, ya know besides women, in the fans just told him to go shit in a hat. Oh you were a Pro Bowler in the NFL? You had 15 sacks in the most competitive football league in the world? Yea not up in here, not in the Indoor Football League. We don’t take kindly to that kinda shit.
Greg Hardy is a scumbag without any sliver of remorse so I think its time to put that guy in the Disney Vault. But how about the Screaming Eagles? Legit running their team like Twitch Plays Pokemon. Letting the fans vote on everything from who the team signs all the way down to what plays to run.
Its brilliant yet moronic at the same time. Its like a real life Madden Franchise Mode. Its the one thing fans crave, the ability to somehow effect the outcome of the game on the field. Yet there will always be assholes like me who will vote for the team to sign guys like JaMarcus Russell because with my play calling I can make it work. Put him in the shotgun and throw howitzers down field or scramble for 60 yard touchdowns. I am the architect of asshole quarterbacks. I’m like the Bill Walsh of mobile QBs who have no business being under center in the NFL. I’ll make it work.
Anyways, kudos to the Salt Lake Screaming Eagles fans for telling Hardy to piss up a rope. I’m glad someone finally did.
ESPN – Sean Payton says his Super Bowl-week meeting with Johnny Manziel was just a get-to-know-you session with the embattled quarterback, who is eyeing an NFL comeback. Payton told the New Orleans Saints’ website Tuesday that it was the first time he met Manziel.
I need Money Manziel back in the NFL like I need air. This guy was one of the most electrifying college players ever then had a really brief up and down career with the Browns before getting hurt and then going on a bender to rival all benders. If the guy can just take a page out of the Gronk playbook and keep it dry during the season then he’s got a shot.
But you know what doesn’t help that? Living in fucking New Orleans.
I’m sure that would go over great when Johnny goes missing for a few days in late February before resurfacing with a shattered iPhone and a bottle of Pepto on Fat Tuesday. But hey at least Mardi Gras is after the Super Bowl so what better way to celebrate than bringing the Saints back to the promise land once Drew Brees calls it a career.
Theres probably no one better for Johnny Manziel to learn under actually than Drew Brees. Sure Tom Brady is the GOAT, Aaron Rodgers is a stud etc. but Brees like Manziel is a fellow short guy. Brees could show Manziel how to take advantage of his height and how to avoid the pitfalls (like getting smoked by linebackers on a scramble).
Sean Payton can say he was “just having breakfast” with Manziel all he wants, but this guy is on the hunt for his next QB. Brees won’t be around forever and he needs to find the next guy because Garret Grayson ain’t that guy and he knows it. Why not kick the tires on a 24 year old former Heisman winner? Comeback SZN indeed.
Make Johnny Manziel Great Again.
Shoutout to @ProFootballRumors for the money photoshop of Johnny Manziel as a Saint
USA Today – Special teams players trying to block a kick might have to resort to a new set of tricks next season. On Tuesday, NFL owners voted to outlaw players from leaping over offensive linemen on field goal or extra point attempts. The competition committee’s measure was endorsed by the NFL Players Association, with union president Eric Winston saying at the scouting combine that the tactic put players at risk. Players previously were permitted to vault over the line of scrimmage so long as they did not land directly on another person or use their hands or arms to gain leverage.
Just when Belichick is starting to get the hang of something the NFL goes and bans it. Yesterday the league voted to prohibit players from jumping over the offensive line to block a kick.
Why you ask? Because apparently playing a game of leap frog is a tactic that “puts players at risk.” Bullshit. You know what is a tactic that puts players at risk? Slant routes across the middle of the field.
This isn’t rugby where you have to lock arms with other players with no way of protecting yourself if you fall forward. This is a bunch of 300 pound guys in armor that would rival the Kingsguard.
I’m sure they can handle someone trying to Air Bud over them. I mean maybe the NFL worries about the guy jumping over the line getting speared to the moon, but hey thats the risk you take when you play the most violent sport in America.
I still picture Bill Polian at these meetings openly petitioning against this play like he’s lobbying against Big Tobacco because its something that Belichick and the Patriots have gotten good at. Like the time Polian openly bitched and moaned (while on the NFL Competition Committee) after 2003 when the Patriots absolutely mauled Peyton Manning and the Colts in the playoffs. So much so that the league created the new rule Illegal Contact, which helped spawn the flag football league that we know today.
All in all pretty uneventful rule changes, but the league is getting rid of the replay monitor on the sideline. Starting next year referees will have a handheld device and won’t have to run over and get under the hood for 20 minutes to determine a replay. So thats a welcome change. One rule change that didn’t pass that sounded excellent:
A proposal that would have placed the ball at the 20-yard line (rather than the 25) if a kickoff went through the uprights did not pass.
That would be awesome. Sebastian Janikowski just BOOTING the ball to try and save his teams 5 yards of field possession. I feel like theres going to be a change made to touchbacks sooner than later though since Belichick and other coaches have figured out they just can kick the ball to the 1, force the return man to come out and still bring them down before the 25. So that kind of negates the intentions of that initial rule change.
But hey, you mess around with the rules and smart coaches are gonna figure out the best way to manipulate them.
The 300s 