IGN – Game of Thrones’ planned prequel series is no longer going forward at HBO. After a pilot for the Naomi Watts-starring series was filmed earlier this year, the network has opted not to move forward with the untitled Game of Thrones spinoff..Set 5,000 years before the events of Game of Thrones, the prequel would have explored the Age of Heroes and likely key historical figures like Bran the Builder — but, notably, wouldn’t feature the Targargyens. Martin had said that while the Starks and direwolves will be featured in the show, it would be a different Westeros than what fans are used to.
The Game Of Thrones universe really has taken a lot of blows over the last 6 months. Yesterday we got news of David Benioff and DB Weiss getting 86’d from Star Wars and now HBO isn’t picking up The Long Night prequel series despite already shooting a pilot.
To be honest a prequel starring Naomi Watts and focusing on characters like Bran the Builder, pre-Targaryens, pre-White Walkers, pre-7 kingdoms didn’t really sound all that interesting. Well, it looks like HBO agreed.
However I am a schill for anything Thrones related so I will watch anything and everything they put out. It would be interesting to see the buildup to the first appearance of the White Walkers and hopefully get some actual meat on the bones around their origin. If you recall this scene from Season 1, Old Nan tells Bran a story about The Long Night, which took place thousands of years before the Game of Thrones we know and love.
A lot of Thrones news has broken this week, including Benioff and Weiss deciding to leave (i.e. got fired) the next Star Wars trilogy they were hired to develop. Benioff and Weiss basically admitted in a recent Q&A not even understanding the GoT characters until they were *forced* to write more scenes due to contractual obligations.
Who admits that?? Seriously, just look at some of the exchanges these two gave.
Two months before the pilot was to air, the episodes were averaging 39 minutes and HBO made then write and film 100 minutes of scenes to meet their contractual obligations. For example, they added a scene with Robert and Cersei – and realized that there was no scene with them.
Dan is saying that he let the actors redefined the roles, esp Maisie and they began writing for the actors, it is like the actor moved into the “house” and redecorated. He said he learned about the characters from the actors.
I understand its supposed to be self deprecating and tweets don’t convey tone and context, which can mean a lot, but these guys are basically confirming what every one of their critics has been hammering them on since Season 8 ended.
It would seem like the next best bet of seeing Thrones on your TV any time in the near future would be HBO picking up the script for George RR Martin’s Targaryen prequel “Fire and Blood,” which takes place hundreds of years before Thrones and focuses on how the Targaryen dynasty came to be.
The series is co-created by @GRRMSpeaking and Ryan Condal. Miguel Sapochnik will partner with Condal as showrunner and will direct the pilot and additional episodes. Condal will be writing the series. pic.twitter.com/9ttMzElgXm
Thankfully, Miguel Sapochnik is attached as executive producer and director which is great news since he directed some of the best Thrones episodes ever. Sapochnik directed Battle of the Bastards (which won an Emmy), Hardhome (wildlings battle with White Walkers), Winds of Winter (Cersei blowing up the Sept), as well as Season 8 eps The Long Night (battle with the White Walkers at Winterfell) and The Bells (Khaleesi destroying Kings Landing).
Yes House of the Dragon is based on the prequel Martin wrote while he was too busy to finish writing the main books that would have saved the TV show. Benioff and Weiss got exposed badly in the last 2 seasons once the play by play directions (and dialogue) from Martin were no longer there. The internet mob has already played judge, jury, and executioner with Benioff and Weiss earning all the blame for the meh Season 8. But Martin should get just as much blame, especially after working with those two guys for a decade. He knew what they were and what they weren’t actually creating and he probably knew the show would take a hit once his playbook wasn’t there for them to lean on. So he decided to write a 736 page history of the Targaryens instead of finishing the only important Game of Thrones story.
What the fuck man?
Thats negligent malpractice on Martin’s part so that final Game of Thrones novel better be the best goddamn book since the Bible.
PS – I know its too closely tied to the show that literally just ended, but give me a mini-series of Robert’s Rebellion and I would watch the shit out of that. Everyone already knows the key characters so you don’t need to spend years building it up. Get in, get out, make a billion dollars.
In what has become an annual showcase for Game of Thrones, HBO proved once again the penultimate episode of each season is the one you don’t want to miss with last night’s “Beyond the Wall.” Every year the second to last episode of each season is an absolute gem. Here’s a quick refresher on how GOT never waits around until the finale to drop some bombs. Each season’s penultimate episode:
Season 1: “Baelor” (Ned Stark loses his head and Khal Drogo falls ill)
Season 2: “Blackwater” (Still arguably the best episode in the series as Stannis attacks Kings Landing on Blackwater Bay only to be defeted by Tyrion and co.
Season 3: “Rains of Castermere” (The goddamn Red Wedding, which IMDB synopsis describes as ‘Robb and Catelyn arrive at the Twins for the wedding’ in a horribly misleading fashion.)
Season 4: “The Watchers on the Wall” (Jon Snow and the Night’s Watch defend the Wall against Mance Rayder and the wildlings.)
Season 5: “The Dance of Dragons” (Stannis roasts his daughter, Jon Snow brings the wildlings through the Wall, Khaleesi rides Drogon to safety out of the Mereen fighting pits.)
Season 6: “Battle of the Bastards” (Not much to say here other than this could also be arguably the greatest GOT episode ever.)
The show picks up right where we left off last week with Magnificent Seven venturing beyond the wall.
Jon Snow and Jorah have a heart to heart for the first time and its a refreshing moment of growth. Remember Jorah should rightfully hate Jon Snow. Jon’s father Ned labeled Jorah a traitor and essentially forced him to leave his family and his homeland forever. Jon also effectively became Jeor Mormont’s surrogate son whom he passed Longclaw down to after the shame Jorah brought to House Mormont. To top it all off, no Jon’s moving in on his girl Khaleesi. But Jorah doesn’t hate Jon. He respects him for everything he’s accomplished, including earning his father’s respect and earning Longclaw, regardless of what his name is.
In an instance of foreshadowing we see the first animal wight in the form of a zombie polar bear. “Do bears have blue eyes?” one of the Magnificent Seven asks before it all goes down. Thoros of Myr ends up getting ragdolled by a goddamn zombie bear and a few nameless wildlings got axed too. We also learn that The Hound is going to have a hard time serving the Lord of Light and fighting wights since the one thing that kills them most effectively (ya know, fire) paralyzes him with fear.
The group heads further north until The Hound sees the same thing he saw in his vision in the fire, a mountain shaped like an arrowhead. Not long after they stumble upon a lone White Walker and a group of wights like a dead ranging party. Time to initiate the ill advised plan to try and capture a wight and bring it back south.
Of course they all nearly die because this moronic plan shockingly does not go well. They do take out the group of wights with Jon destroying the White Walker with the Valyrian steel sword he nearly gave away minutes before (WTF Jon). Except their POW wight lets out a scream that acts as a bat signal for every other dead soldier in the north and now our heroes are screwed.
The gang gets marooned on an ice island as the White Walkers and their army surrounded them. The only reason they aren’t immediately killed is because the thin ice breaks and the dead aren’t exactly fond of swimming. So now we play the waiting game. Just waiting for death to come, figuratively and literally.
Jon opts to use one of his 3 lifelines and sends Gendry to phone a friend.
Tyrion tries to advise Khaleesi on a number of things in this episode such as what’s the plan of succession if she were to die? Khaleesi is not a fan of the conversation and says they’ll discuss it when she wears the crown, which could be a bit of grim foreshadowing we all look back on. But specifically he once again advises Khaleesi again risking her own life to rescue Jon Snow, Jorah and the others. In a direct response to the recent failures she’s experienced following Tyrion’s advice while simultaneously directly heeding the late Olenna’s advice (“Be a dragon”) Khaleesi says enough is enough and rides north on the back of Drogon.
Enter Khaleesi (if you can accept White Walkers but you can’t accept faster than normal travel I don’t want to be your friend) and her 3 gigantic dragons who just start flame throwing the entire place. It seems like the dragons really are the end all be all of weapons in the 7 Kingdoms, but similar to the Loot Train scene from a couple of weeks ago we once again see just how powerful yet vulnerable the dragons are at the same time.
The Night King takes his ice spear and just rifles it into the sky as Viserion gets tagged and falls from the sky while bleeding uncontrollably. I think this was the saddest I’ve been watching a TV show since Jack had a nervous breakdown about leaving the island on LOST.
The look Jon Snow gives the Night King had me thinking this is it for our boy, he’s going to go out in a blaze of glory trying to take out the head White Walker. As he tells Khaleesi to go he battles a few more wights before falling through the ice, which is the second time in three episodes the show runners have teased a major character drowning.
Shockingly, Jon does not in fact drown, but there is still an army of dead 50 feet away. This would be a pretty anti-climactic way to die so suddenly half-dead Uncle Benjen rides in out of nowhere on his horse to save Jon Snow’s ass and then sacrifices himself. Why couldn’t Benjen get on the horse and ride away with Jon too? As Michael Bay once said to Ben Affleck after Ben asked wouldn’t it be easier to just teach astronauts how to drill rather than the reverse? Shutup, Ben.
After surviving and making it back to the wall the team loads Jon up on the ship back to Dragonstone and we have a real moment between Khaleesi and Jon. Her dragons are not just pets to her, one of Khaleesi’s children just died, which is what makes it all the worse that they died helping Jon. So we see Khaleesi have the first real crack in her armor in years as she nearly breaks down sobbing mourning her dragon.
In a show of faith in her as a true leader and probably also a vague marriage proposal Jon tells her “You are my queen.” Jon bends the knee, well figuratively, since he’s on his deathbed once again.
Its the first time we have the North truly following a Targaryen since the Mad King. Jon doesn’t care what his people will say, he knows Khaleesi is the Queen they need. Now whether, Jon will be her King or not remains to be seen. But for now, they are allies at the very least.
Also, in addition to the Jon’s knife wounds on his chest courtesy of the Night’s Watch, he suddenly has blue marks on his chest. Is this just the frostbite and remnants of nearly drowning in ice cold water or is it something more? If you look at Benjen (RIP) closely, his face has the same blueish hue after he apparently fought off death and a transition to a wight. We don’t really ever learn a ton around Benjen’s story and what really happened (and we probably never will now) but has Jon been touched by something? Or is this just me looking too deeply into a show that has prided itself on deep, deep world building? I digress.
In the Den of Geek breakdown they also pointed out something interesting about this scene as well as everyone’s transportation home.
“It’s a moment so romantic that Dany even finds the scars that prove he was stabbed in the heart endearing. Jon appears to truly be hers, and hey he still tellingly didn’t ride Drogon with the rest of his comrades… he has his father’s namesake, Rhaegal, to look forward to mounting.”
So that is an interesting bit I thought. We still have yet to see Jon Snow on a dragon, even though all his crew has now been on one. And Khaleesi has only ever ridden on the back of Drogon. So is Rhaegal keeping his back for the one true king, Jon Snow?
The whole Sansa/Arya sister rivalry just took a dark twist as Sansa stumbles upon Arya’s bag of faces and realizes her little sister might be an even bigger psychopath than she thought. Arya all but threatens Sansa’s life and now we have the strangest power struggle I can remember on this show. It seems a little convenient writing as I would like to think after years of surviving older, more experienced foes and politicking all through the 7 Kingdowns (and Essos) that these two would be able to understand whats going on here. Imagine taking the transcript of an AIM chat you had when you were 14 and using that as hardcore, stone cold evidence of your character as a person years later?
Either way, Sansa is spooked about Arya either killing her or actually convincing the other northern lords that the words a 14 year old girl wrote, under durress, prove she is a traitor. Sansa fears losing her head as well as her role as ruler of the North.
So naturally she sends her sworn protector Brienne of Tarth to Kings Landing, which reeks of Littlefingers, well, finger prints. Was there actually a raven summoning her to Kings Landing or does Sansa just want to get Brienne out of Winterfell in case she needs to off Arya? Brienne is after all sworn to protect both of Catlyn Tully’s daughters, so if Sansa needs to axe Arya she doesn’t want anyone there to stop her. My question is though, as Sansa, the one without a single day of combat training, wouldn’t you be more worried about Arya killing you? Wouldn’t you want a bodyguard with you now more than ever? This story line just gets odder and odder.
At the end of the episode we see the army of the dead pulling Viserion up from his icy grave to be resurrected. Enter the ice dragon. The Night King’s wight dragon. Something else that Den of Geek speculated on is that maybe the reason the Night King and the White Walkers were simply waiting for the ice to freeze so they can attack Jon and his gang wasn’t just exposition allowing Khaleesi enough time to get there. Maybe the Night King knew Khaleesi was coming with her dragons and he was legitimately waiting for her. Waiting for her to come into his arena so he can down one and claim a dragon of his own. A much more satisfying and chilling explanation to that entire scene. Because we all know the White Walkers and the wights can’t break through the Wall. But what if the Night King had his own damn dragon to simply fly over the towering ice monstrosity of a wall? Or maybe they make good on the Season 7 opening credits and simply walk around the wall over the frozen ice. Either way the big baddie now has a dragon of his own which is downright frightening.
Next week we have the most tense meeting of the UN ever created. What traps and tricks can we expect in the 90 minute season finale? Did we really risk so much, getting Viserion (and Thoros!) killed just for one wight?
That whole sequence better actually have been worth it, but I’m not too optimistic. I don’t expect Cersei to suddenly care about some existential threat (real or not) because she is so single-mindedly focused on keeping the Iron Throne she will do whatever it takes to stay there. Even if it means her own demise. We’re running out of time though for everyone to be fighting two battles at the same time, so someone is gonna have to either shit or get off the pot. Next week could be the last we see of Cersei.
One more episode guys and then the Long Night truly does begin because god knows how long it’ll be until the 8th and final season of Game of Thrones.
Episode 012 of The 300s Podcast is up and we’re talking Game of Thrones. You can download and listen to it on iTunes right here. We dive into this week’s episode “Eastwatch.” Khaleesi is burning entire Houses up, Cersei has a new addition to the crazy family, and Jon Snow is going north of the Wall with the ’92 Dream Team. SUBSCRIBE!
Hoooly hell. The 4th episode of Game of Thrones season 7 “The Spoils of War” was an all-timer that legitimately had my heart rate bumping as the credits rolled. What made this episode all the more exciting was the unexpected nature of it. If you watched the preview for this episode after last week’s show, you saw the look of concern from Jaime looking over the hill. So you knew something was coming. But no one expected the hoard of Dothraki AND Khaleesi riding Drogon. A ton of huge stuff went down in what was ironically the shortest episode of Thrones ever. House by House, Lets get it.
House Stark
Arya has finally returned to Winterfell for the first time since the Game of Thrones pilot and holy hell can she fight. Arya always looked like a promising water dancer after training with Syrio Forel and of course what she leanred from the Hound. What we see from her in this short fight scene with Brienne though shows just how far Arya has come.
No longer is she a little girl trying to be a swordsman; she is a certified badass. This fight scene is symbolic too because of all the people Arya has met over the years she definitely holds Brienne in a high regard because of her ability, as a woman, to defeat the Hound in single combat. So to see Arya basically toy with Brienne and showcase her insane fighting talent was incredible.
Arya and Brienne sparring is 92 Dream Team scrimmage footage.
Another quick little callback that Thrones seems to be peppering this season with came when Brienne asks Arya who taught her to do that and she responds “No one.” No one? Why does she say that? Because a man has no name…
Sansa for the second episode in a row learns that one of her siblings has been up to some shit. Sansa understandibly thought she had the hardest road of all her siblings after everything she’d been through with Cersei, Joffrey, Ramsay etc. But she’s slowly starting to realize that Bran and Arya have been through the ringer as well. Does Sansa seem a little disheartened after seeing Arya fight? Bran’s got the sight and Arya is a little assassin…what does Sansa really have? Other than a mind for politics?
Bran also is seemingly about to blow up Littlefinger’s spot, whether he realizes it yet or not. Bran basically knows everything, but having that much information in your head makes most of it white noise. So its like he’s flipping through the channels and seeing little tidbits about the people around him from over the years. So its only a matter of time until he learns how to hone in on specific things. Littlefinnger gives Bran the Valeryian steel dagger (Exposition!) that was used in his attempted murder and mentions how coming home now must be chaos and Bran cuts him off saying “Chaos is a ladder.” Uh oh.
Littlefinger is shook because he said this exact shit to Varys years ago in the Throne Room.
Its at this exact moment Littlefinger realizes he is on the hot seat like a coach coming off a 7-9 season and he now knows Bran could be a problem. How long before Bran realizes Littlefinger’s potential role in his attempted murder, what about the time he got Ned Stark killed by turning on him? Or how he kicked Lysa out the goddamn moon door? I’m sure Nestor Royce wouldn’t be too stoked about that.
Now a few things in play here. He can’t just make another attempt on Bran’s life and get away with it so how does Littlefinger play this one? What happens to the Vale if the Starks just straight up off Littlefinger though? He is the Lord of the Vale after all. Welp, Nestor Royce, who was on Baelish’s trial in the Vale after Lysa’s death has no love for Littlefinger so maybe it won’t be a problem.
But that little breastfed-for-far-too-long Robert Arryn (who refers to Littlefinger as Uncle Petyr) is probably like 16 now so he’s due for a comeback. Again, GoT does not just send off characters randomly without explaining what happened to them or bringing them back. Last time we saw him he was training with a sword and a bow. I doubt he’s going to suddenly be The Hound, but he’s definitely due for a comeback.
Also, how about Bran interacting with Meera who says she has to go home and Bran basically just saying “K thanks see ya.” Meera’s been dragging his ass through the woods north of the wall for years, her brother Jojen legit died for Bran. Them and Hodor are the only reason the human backpack is alive. Yet he’s changed so much becoming the Three Eyed Raven he doesn’t have the emotional intelligence to even feign empathy anymore.”I remember being Bran, but I remember so much else,” Bran says to Meera. Kid is dead inside.
House Targaryen
Jon brings Dany into the cave below Dragonstone to show her not just the dragonglass but also the mysterious paintings. Jon explains how they were put there by the Children of the Forest and show how they banded together with the First Men to take on the White Walkers.
Anybody else notice the shapes of those paintings on the walls? They matched the same shapes the White Walkers routinely left bodies up north over the years, including in the pilot. Is this the White Walkers just mocking them?
Khaleesi is losing allies by the day so she mentions why not just hop on her dragon, burn the Red Keep to the ground and be done with it? But even Jon says if you do that you wont be any different, you’ll just be another power hungry, violent, usurper.
Khaleesi has been patiently taking her team’s counsel, but she seems pretty over Tyrion’s advice as its turned out poorly thus far. She actually stops just short of outright accusing him of treason because of all these failures insinuating he doesn’t want to hurt the Lannisters. As I mentioned last week it seems like the failure of strategy and being outsmarted has seemed to rattle Tyrion a bit so this can’t help the old ego.
Finally we see the Dothraki unleashed on Westeros like we had discussed as a distinct possibility on the 300s Podcast. It seems like Khaleesi is starting to take the late Olenna’s advice, “Be a Dragon. We see the Dothraki hoard taking on the Lannister army after hearing for years how it was suicide to do so, chief among them the late King Robert.
Behind a castle the Dothraki are much easier to beat, but in an open field they’re unmatched. So this is the first time we get to see that go down and it is WILD. They definitely earned the nickname Dothraki Screamers and it was awesome to see the guys standing up on their galloping horses firing arrows as they charge.
Not to mention adding insult to injury for the Lannisters Khaleesi flies in on Drogon and starts burning soldiers left and right and roasting their entire supply chain.
It’s the first time we’ve truly seen the dragons in play in a battle and it is glorious. Unsurprisingly they just run train, but why is Khaleesi not wearing ANY armor? Sure the dragons can just take out an army no problem, but Khaleesi is still a 120 pound blonde girl up there. Maybe put on a helmet or at least a heavy winter coat?
BUT the Lannisters suddenly have a trump card in the absolute howitzer of a bow and arrow known as the Scorpion. Bronn snipes Drogon and nearly takes the gigantic beast down with one shot. (Full disclosure: this scene gave me a full on identity crisis. I love Bronn, but I’ll openly weep if this dragon goes down right now. Real tough times so keep me in your thoughts.) This is gonna be ROUGH moving forward with all our fav characters directly trying to kill each other.
So the real question is now Khaleesi knows that her dragons, who she previously though untouchable, can be hurt or maybe even killed. How does that change her plans? I would think this makes her a little hesitant to ride around Kings Landing just pillaging the place. This was just one Scorpion in a field. Imagine the dozens or hundreds of these things Qyburn has built in Kings Landing? This is a legit defense to a previously thought unmatched weapon in the dragons. And suddenly the playing field is not as lopsided as we thought. Lannisters still don’t have an army though…
House Lannister
We discussed the battle above so we don’t need to dive into the specifics of that again. One of the shots that stuck out to me was Tyrion on the hill. We see him watching all of the Lannister soldiers burn and it it looks like he’s having a mini existential crisis. He may only now be coming to terms with the fact that he’s not just fighting Cersei’s crazy ass, he’s also turning on his entire House and his beloved brother. How does that affect his mindset as we get closer to the end?
How about Bronn saving Jaimes ass yet again? If it weren’t for Bronn, House Lannister would have been dust in the wind by now. So back to Jaime, who went all Leeroy Jenkins in a last ditch effort to try and take out a suddenly grounded Khaleesi.
Pretty dumb plan to be honest, considering there is still a 500 pound dragon sitting next to her. Why not chuck the spear? I guess because he still can’t do shit with his left hand?
This whole scene is telling because if you remember the conversation way back in Season 1 between Jaime, King Robert and Ser Barriston they’re telling tales from their first kills in battle. Robert basically details this exact moment of how a man tries to end the rebellion himself like a fool.
“Mine was some Tarly boy at the Battle of Summerhall. My horse took an arrow so I was on foot, slogging through the mud. He came running at me, the dumb high-born lad, thinking he could end the rebellion with a single swing of his sword. I knocked him down with the hammer. Gods, I was strong then. Caved in his breastplate. Probably shattered every rib he had.”
Time is a flat circle.
House Greyjoy
Euron’s basically out there lurking like a goddamn snake in the water, except now his role is going to be even larger. With the majority of the Lannister army burnt out (I’ll see myself out) Cersei NEEDS him and the Iron Fleet now more than ever. If there’s one person who’s going to take advantage of leverage, its Euron.
Upon seeing Theon for the first time in years, Jon has to restrain himself from killing him right there on the beach, ironically right after he tells Khaleesi how they must all band together despite their issues with one another. This is the first time they’ve seen each other since Theon betrayed his brother Rob and essentially destroyed Winterfell. Theon himself says he could never take the Black and join the Nights Watch because Jon Snow would literally kill him.
Jon knows Theon didn’t actually kill Rickon and Bran obviously buttt he did still behead Ser Rodrick and he IS ultimately responsible for Maester Luwin getting killed and the whole place getting torched. So thats a tough one to forgive still. It’s only because of his role in helping Sansa escape Ramsay that he’s alive now. So it will be interesting to see how their relationship progresses. As Ramsay was helping Theon “escape” the Dreadfort a few seasons ago, Theon broke down in tears because he betrayed his brothers and even said “My real father lost his head in Kings Landing.” He truly does consider the Starks his family, but the feeling may not be mutual anymore.
Other notes from around the realm:
Looks like Jon Snow and them are finally getting some use out of Bran, who I lovingly referred to as “the backpack” for the last 6 seasons. In the preview of Episode 5 Bran seemingly wargs into some ravens over the Wall and sees the White Walkers nearing East Watch by the Sea, which is also where Tormund is. So it could be curtains for your favorite wildling as he’s the first line of defense holding that castle on the Wall. If you’ve been reading this weekly breakdown though, you know how in the GoT opening credits the water that Eastwatch is usually flanked by is now frozen over. So I fully expect the White Walkers to just walk around the Wall. Huge design flaw guys.
Missandei asking Jon why he is named “Snow” if his father was a Stark was cool to see because they don’t have marriage where she’s from, thus negating the concept of a bastard. Missandei goes on a passionate rant about how Khaleesi is Queen not by birthright, but because her ppl believe in her. Ya know, like Jon.
Khaleesi says she will fight for the north…if Jon bends the knee but he’s torn because his people will not want a southern ruler after all the shit thats gone down in GoT. After all the simmering sexual tension between the two though, what if he marries Khaleesi? Maybe thats how they ultimately unite the 7 kingdoms. The north won’t bend the knee but if the King in the North marries the Queen to become King of the Realm? Maybe that brings the north back into the fold.
Cersei refers to Qyburn as her Hand in this episode and unless I’m mistaken its the first time she’s ever mentioned this. So the guy is no longer just a maester operating and experimenting for Cersei, he’s her No. 2, which is even scarier considering all the wild shit he’s done over the years.
So Game of Thrones aired its second episode of Season 7 Sunday night titled “Stormborn” which is an obvious nod to Khaleesi AKA Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen,First of Her Name, the Unburnt, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea,Breaker of Chains, and Mother of Dragons. So yea, Stormborn was an easier title for an episode. Anyways lots to break down so LETS GET IT.
House Greyjoy
Lets not beat around the bush, how about that absolute hellacious Pirate Invasion by Euron on the open seas? This guy really is a psycho huh? Starting to see hints of what the actor who plays him said in interviews before the season about how Euron would make Ramsay Bolton look like a little kid. Yikes.
The Greyjoy fleet of Theon and Yara is basically toast. Its like any fleet that leaves Dragonstone is destined to be burned to the fucking ground a la Stannis at Blackwater Bay. We got Theon falling back into bad habits too. It seems like the crazy violent and torturous way of Euron (i.e. ripping out dudes tongues) and his Iron born gave Theon a hard reset back to his Reek days, which sucks. Silver lining though he is alive soo maybe he redeems himself again? Running out of episodes here Theon, lets pick it up.
Half of the Targaryen alliance just burned up on the open seas as the Dornish leader Ellaria and her daughters the sand snakes were all either killed or taken captive. This really screws up Khaleesi’s plan of taking Kings Landing using the Dornish army so she’ll probably be looking for more Houses to partner up with. Lucky for her the King of the North is on his way down to Dragonstone.
House Stark
Jon knows he needs Khaleesi, her army, and her dragons if the North has any chance against the White Walkers, but the last thing the northerners want to do is put their faith in the daughter of the goddamn Mad King. Jon’s point is that they need the mountain of Dragonglass that is under Dragonstone, not to mention the three large dragons that Khaleesi has, if they are to stand any chance against the Night King. But Sansa makes a pretty damn good point saying “Do you not remember what happened to our grandfather?” Long story short – the Mad King once called Jon Snow’s grandfather, Rickard Stark, to come down to King’s Landing and “bend the knee” except when he got there the Mad King burned the guy alive. The Mad King also later killed Jon’s uncle Brandon Stark too. So you’ll forgive Sansa for not being overly excited to send the freshly minted King of the North down south to meet another Targaryen to once again bend the knee.
I think Jon has learned a lot in a very short period of time, taking counsel from those around him and internalizing a lot of what people are saying to him, whether the others realize it or not. One thing Sansa said to Jon recently was that he needs to not be stupid like their father and Rob or he’ll be killed just like them. Pride, honor and really stubbornness to their ways are what ultimately got Rob and Ned killed. So while going to Dragonstone is definitely a risk, holding up shop in the North because of stubbornness is a sure fire way to die.
Something I am stoked to see though is if Khaleesi truly needs Jon Snow to bend the knee. While it doesn’t seem like he has any real aspirations to sit on the Iron Throne, if you remember his days with the wildlings, Jon grew to respect and idolize, really, Mance Rayder the King beyond the wall.
Mance awakened Jon to a lot of things beyond the blinders the Night’s Watch had put on him, among them the fact that some traditions of the 7 kingdoms are arbitrary and ridiculous.
As we all saw, Jon loved a wildling woman, saved the wildlings from Hardhome, literally got MURDERED by his peers for letting the wildlings through the Wall. Is it that crazy to assume a central ideology of one of his mentors sticks with him? We do not kneel. Or is this the Stark stubbornness I just mentioned that derails Jon Snow?
With Jon heading south, Sansa is now in charge of the North and that sound you just heard was Littlefinger’s erection smashing into the table. And Jon Snow knows it and does NOT like it, despite Littlefinger saving his ass with the Knights of the Vale. Jon Snow is WOKE on Baelish.
I’ve been waiting for this moment for 5.5 seasons and I am a fucking nerd for typing that sentence I know. This is a pivotal moment for Arya as we’re starting to witness her blind determination starting to waiver. When she first landed in Westeros she axed the entire Frey clan and was single-mindedly riding towards Kings Landing to kill the queen. Now she sees her direwolf for the first time in years, the same one she had to chase off in season 1 to save her after Nymeria bit that sonofabitch Joffrey. It really is quite impressive they recognize each other after all this time. Doesn’t seem like Nymeria is ready to be anyone’s pet as she’s currently running the goddamn jungle as a wolfpack leader, but I doubt we’ve seen the last of her. I keep telling people this, but Thrones does not waste a second of dialogue and very rarely leaves loose ends (looking at you Gendry).
Oh and Hotpie’s alive too.
BTW, Anyone else notice Arya’s mannerisms now? When talking to Hotpie she is eating, speaking and acting JUST like the Hound. Real short. No niceties. — “Got any ale?”
House Targaryen
Moving on, props to Varys for the most badass speech in his character’s history to convince Khaleesi he’s here to help. I don’t think she necessarily trusts him, but she understands his motives. All she asks is if you think I’m doing a shit job, tell me, don’t sail to Essos and plot a coup.
Olenna Tyrell is still a badass old lady who gives no fucks, asking the Mother of Dragons “Your grand plan was to march down here and use our armies?” The lady is fearless, have to give her that. And I think Khaleesi realizes she can learn a lot in the ways of Westerosi politics from Olenna. “You’re a dragon. Be a dragon.”
House Lannister
Cersei is calling in her bannermen and spin zoning the SHIT out of Khaleesi’s history (murdering the noblemen AKA the slave masters and feeding them to her dragons). She needs everyone to get her back to help fight off Khaleesi and the only way to do that is to play to people’s fears of the Mad King and the Targaryens in general. Without that, people will just flop to whoever they think will win. But Tyrion makes a GREAT point back on Dragonstone, saying they only way to RULE the 7 kingdoms vs just simply conquering them is with help from the Westerosi people themselves. By working with the Houses that already live there they can truly overthrow the regime, not just smash everything to ashes.
Also, laughed out loud at Jamie trying to get House Tarly to be his No. 1 general and Tarly basically tells Jamie to fuck himself. Welp, back to the drawing board Kingslayer.
WRAP IT UP BOX
I’ve noticed a LOT of loooong scenes this season like the Sam bedpan scene in last week’s episode and this week’s scene of Sam removing Jorah’s gray scale, slowly and painfully, not to mention the overly long Grey Worm sex scene. I don’t know if its due to new directors on Season 7, but the pacing feels out of place. Maybe they’re trying to lull us into a false sense of security because with the long, quiet, drawn out Grey Worm scene I was fully expecting someone to get knifed.
Did anyone notice in the GoT opening credits that at the end of the Wall the water is actually frozen?
No need to climb the Wall when you can walk right around it. Not to mention, if Benjen was right, maybe the White Walkers can’t pass through the wall since it was forged with ice and magic, so going around it seems to be a pretty good solution. Who knows though. When Bran was messing around and got touched by the Night King it allowed him to come into the One Eyed Raven’s cave (and murder him) which he could not do before. This also got Hodor, a bunch of the children of the forest and not to mention Bran’s direwolf killed. So good job Bran.
Also in case anyone already forgot Season 7 only has SEVEN episodes and we’ve already burned through two. So theres only just over a month of Thrones left in our lives before another cold, dark winter. Goddamnit, enjoy the ride.
In this very special edition of The 300s Podcast we breakdown all the Houses, characters, and plot lines of Westeros as Game of Thrones is FINALLY back.
Season 7 premiered this week with “Dragonstone” and after 6 seasons filled with dozens of story lines and hundreds of characters we’re starting to see the wrap it up box in full effect.
Time to start tying up some loose ends. That may have been the shortest GOT opening credits ever as we’ve finally got all the characters on one continent with only a few key players really left. Now lets sort through them, House by House.
House Stark
Arya with one of the most satisfying moments in the show’s history just straight up erasing House Fray in one shot. You knew something was up when the show skipped the traditional into to get started without delay. GOT only does that when a bombshell is about to be dropped.
And boy did they deliver. We’ve seen Arya going down a dark path for a while now as she’s crossing names off her list one by one, but this was her coming out moment. This was where we all sat back and said oh shit Arya is in play, this isn’t a neat little trick any more, she can seemingly take out anyone at anytime. So now she’s on to kill the queen in Kings Landing. At this point does anyone doubt she actually can? The real question is whats her plan? Its not enough to just kill the people on her list, Arya has a flair for the dramatics as we’re now seeing. Does she ultimately take the face of Joffrey/Tommen/Myrcella/King Robert to really drive the dagger home? Or maybe she borrows the face of good old Ned Stark to fully enact her revenge. The North remembers indeed.
Jon Snow kicked off Season 7 by nearly getting cucked by his sister in front of all the North bannermen. Sansa openly questions his decision to not root out the Houses in the North that didn’t support the Starks against the Boltons. You can see the simmering tension in the power struggle as Jon has been proclaimed King in the North, but Sansa is still technically the heir to Winterfell as a trueborn child of Ned and Catelyn. Sansa tells her brother she just wants a seat at the table and that he’s actually quite good at leading, but if they continue to butt heads does this create a bigger problem for House Stark?
House Clegane/Brotherhood Without Banners
The Hound is the first character shown enduring the face that Winter has come, alongside the Brotherhood without Banners. If you remember the father and daughter that the Hound and Arya met last season, ate with and then robbed, it was a green field in a pretty moderate climate.
So Winter is not fucking around and it is creeping south pretty dramatically. The Hound also seems to have bought into the Lord of Light after looking into the flames with Thoros of Myr and seeing the dead marching. After all thats been made of his fear of fire, it will be interesting to see how this plays out, worshipping a fire god and all.
Speaking of Cleganes, the Mountain got himself some fancy new black armor huh? It looks like Cersei has done away with the gold cloaks and donned the Kingsguard (technically Queensguard now) in all black. All black everything just like Cersei’s outfit, is it because she’s in mourning for her children or is she just a black hole of a walking disaster thats about to suck everyone down with her?
House Mormont
Lyana Mormont is still a goddamn G. The fierce little girl from Bear Island legitimately undressing the grown men with decades of experience on her and reducing them to humbled nods.
Jorah Mormont has a meaaaan case of greyscale that has gotten significantly worse. Last season it was like a little bit of eczema on his wrist and now his whole entire arm looks like one of the stone men. Seems like he’s banking on the old maesters, who seemingly don’t do much, to save his ass. Probably ill advised. Can’t be a coincidence that Sam discovered the mountain of dragonglass hiding under Dragonstone though. Maybe thats the ticket to his cure, along with being a White Walker killer.
House Targaryen
Khaleesi FINALLY lands in Westeros after 6 seasons of build up and she gets a pretty baller ass castle with ZERO resistance on Dragonstone thanks to Stannis. The mother of dragons is now firmly within striking distance of Kings Landing so I’m curious how long GOT will play this out. Stannis got from Dragonstone to Blackwater Bay in like 2 episodes, please don’t make this a chore guys. Its also the first time we get a real good look at Dragonstone, its throne room and the overall Targaryen design (chalk full of dragons!) to it aside from the Westeros table map we’ve seen Stannis hover over for years.
Brienne of Tarth
Brienne is still drilling and training Podrick how to fight, who is actually starting to look like a pretty legit swordsman. Tormund is still trying to get it in with Brienne too, telling Podrick he’s “a lucky man” when he sees them fighting. These two will be fascinating to watch this year. Can’t let Jon Snow have the only wildling romance in this whole series right?
House Baelish/House Arryn
Whats Littlefinger’s plan? As Sansa points out, “I know exactly what he wants.” Did Sansa promise her own hand in marriage to Baelish in exchange for the Knights of the Veil? Without his help, Jon Snow would have been toast at the Battle of the Bastards with the Boltons. We all know Littlefinger’s ultimate goal is to climb the ladder of chaos and sit atop the Iron Throne. If he could lock down Sansa, he’d have the Veil and all of the North behind him, but Jon Snow really threw a wrench into that plan in last year’s season finale with the whole King in the North shit.
House Lannister
Jaime seems incredibly weary of Cersei, and rightfully so, because she’s gone off the deep end. “‘Enemies to the east, enemies to the west, enemies to the south, enemies to the north.” Now these two must plan for WTF to do next because legitimately the entire world is coming down on them and soon. Jaime attempting to explain to Cersei the amount of danger their in:
Doesn’t seem like theres going to be a happy reunion between these two and Tyrion either who’s back in town with his new friends.
House Greyjoy
We see Theon and Yara with Khaleesi as they have devoted their ships to the Mother of Dragons, but I think it would be shortsighted not to mention Euron Greyjoy for rocking the first leather biker jacket in Westeros history. Seriously the guy looks like he fell into Bam Margera’s closet. Euron is trying to play everyone and Cersei is not having it. You don’t get verbally abused by Tywinn Lannister for 40 years without picking up some cunning. He mentions he’s looking to marry the most beautiful woman in the world; a queen. BUT, he doesn’t say which one. Keep your eye on this one, he’s officially your Season 7 wild card.
Get Ed Sheeran the fuck off my tv screen. One of the most out of place celebrity cameos ever. It was unecessary, but worst of all it did something Thrones has never done; it made me realize I was watching a TV show. It took everyone out of the show for a few minutes as they asked, why the fuck is Ed Sheeran a Lannister soldier. God that was bad.
Did we really need a 5 minute montage of Sam cleaning up bed pans and dry heaving? Sam and Gilly continue to be the worst story line in the entire show. At least Bran’s storyline got the wrap it up box treatment. Bran legit wasn’t even in Season 5 and then last year he’s traveling through time, talking to Ned Stark at the Tower of Joy 20 years in the past, going face to face with a White Walker and ya know getting Hodor killed. RIP. What has Sam done? Got into a fight with his dad, stole his Valyrian sword (definitely something to remember) went to Oldtown with Gilly and the baby and now is stocking a library and working as a janitor. Riveting. He better come back to Jon with the goddamn secret sauce on how to defeat the Night King.
If thats not enough Game of Thrones talk for you, then stay tuned because we’ve got a brand new segment coming your way real soon…
Either way, Sansa is spooked about Arya either killing her or actually convincing the other northern lords that the words a 14 year old girl wrote, under durress, prove she is a traitor. Sansa fears losing her head as well as her role as ruler of the North.
The 300s 