Blogger’s Note: This probably containers spoliers/implied knowledge of things that happened through S8E2 of “Game Of Thrones”. So, if you have not caught up or just generally don’t like reading predictions I’d stop here. I will say I did my best to avoid using anyone else’s prediction or outside knowledge (the books, interviews with show execs) of the show.

As I start writing this it dawned on me that it is kind of ironic that this fight is now happening, as Jon Snow has been to an almost annoying degree shouting from the rooftops it would, before the battle for the Seven Kingdoms. We spent so much time caring about the deft political maneuvering and violent means to political ends in this show we almost forgot about the army of the dead.  As a matter of fact, we were so consumed with what the final outcome of the war for control of the realm, we probably did forget at times.

But here we are. The battle of Man vs. The Dead. Good Vs. Evil. And things don’t look so great, as we knew they didn’t. To reference a hero from a different classic of the fantasy genre, much like Harry Potter knew for a long time he had to die to kill Voldemort, we’ve known for awhile that many of the characters we’ve come to love would die in the war against the dead. It’s just how it was to be.

This is “Game Of Thrones” though. Predicting who is going to die when and why and how has always been about as easy as predicting which way a chicken will run after its head gets chopped off. I think we’ve learned a little though – there have been nuances, signs, and lines we’ve been trained to pick up on. For some audience members, there have been gut feelings they’ve been trained to either carefully listen to or harshly ignore.

Without any further fanfare, here are my predictions for the fate of many of our favorite characters. I’ve organized them into the following categories of post-Battle Of Winterfell status:

Definitely Dead
Probably Dead
I Have No Fucking Idea
Probably Alive
Definitely Alive

Now I know a philosopher would question the difference between the two “probably” categories”, but the difference is easy: I have an inkling either way. A feeling. Something deep down that is telling me either that that character is as good as dead or has a few more breaths to take.

Definitely Dead

Jamie Lannister – The show’s incestual first true villain gets to die a hero. I mean, he has one hand that he still can’t fight for shit with. This will probably play into Cersei saying the baby is Euron’s.

Theon Greyjoy – Like Jamie, Theon finds his redemption in death. Out in the woods guarding Bran, Theon’s newfound bravery will allow him to go out on his shield. One of the more complicated legacies the show leaves behind.

Edd – Other than Samwell Tarly, Edd is Jon Snow’s last remaining Night’s Watch brother who is given any recognition/a speaking part. It sucks he survived the attack on Castle Black for this but I don’t see him going any further.

Beric Dondarrion – With his last life used up thanks to Thoros of Myr dying, it’s curtains for Beric. Him and his flaming sword will give it a ride and it will unfortunately run out of gas,

Bran – Soooo this is an odd one because can Bran reallllyyyy die? Is he totally a mortal? He’s kind of half-man hald-Giver who answers questions likes he’s a teenager on mushrooms being questioned by a cop. So idk if “dies” if quite the word but Bran’s shit is getting fucked up.

Probably Dead

Ser Davos Seaworth – He’s notably noted that he’s notably bad at fighting 100 times. There is also just not much use left in the plot for the Onion Knight. The only reason I didn’t sail Davis past the “probably” and “definitely” section and straight to “I’m flying to Winterfell and killing him myself to put him out of his misery” is because the show has inexplicably kept him alive this long.

Sansa Stark – I just can’t see the showrunners deciding to throw this party and not give us one true, blue heartbreak. Sansa would be a huge one. The whole “the dead are coming but you’ll be totally safe hiding amongst a bunch of dead people” thing doesn’t help her chances. I could say the same for a few more but I have a feeling about Sansa.

Jorah Mormont – Another tough pill to swallow. Is cured of the incurable just to die this way. In an odd sense, his death is similar to Jamie/Theon in that he has definitely redeemed himself by giving his life, but IMO he’s redeemed by now anyway.

I Have No Fucking Idea

Arya – Arya’s whole storyline, if you think about it, does little for the plot. However for some reason I think the show keeps her and her still lengthy list in play for reasons I’ll get to later.

Tormund – Like Davos, there aren’t a ton of reasons they’ve kept him around this long except for comic relief. I could see this going either way, especially, like Arya, if another key character makes it. More on that later.

Varys – Yo where is he?

Ser Brienne Of Tarth – This one I’m the most unsure of in this category (not overall….). The amount of times she’s pledged her life to the Stark girls makes me think she bites it, but the fact that I’m not sure both/either/or die makes me wonder.

Tyrion – The loss of Tyrion would absolutely fucking suck. He has been the breakout character of the whole show. But in terms of those heartbreakers I mentioned before, this is another one I’m not convinced they don’t have up their sleeves. He also made a cryptic to comment to Jorah and I thinnnnnk Greyworm(?) about taking his job soon? At the same time, I thinkhis wit just might be too important to kill off.

Probably Alive

Jon Snow – It would seem unlikely that they’d kill him right after revealing his lineage, but in the past this show has taken “unlikely”, popped a few viagra into it, and fucked us with it. He could also play into the same reasons as Arya and Tormund that I mentioned I’ll get into later. I’m just not ruling Jon dying out completely.

The Hound – This is nothing but pure instinct. As I write this I now see him getting ripped to shreds a la Hodor but I’m sticking with my gut. They’ve kept him alive, time after time, for a reason and unlike poor Davos he can actually fight.

Samwell Tarly – Another gut pick but I think Sam serves one more purpose at some point, using his knowledge and bookishness.

Greyworm – Between Jorah and Greyworm, I feel like one has to live, for reasons below. I’ll go with Greyworm. I’m saying it now I’m least sure of this pick out of all of them.

Definitely Alive

Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen, First of Her Name, the Unburnt, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Breaker of Chains, and Mother of Dragons – Here’s the thing folks. This is episode three. There are six episodes total. EVEN IF this battle carries into episode four there are two + episodes left for a showdown with Cersei Lannister. So Man, as in Mankind….kind of has to win? Unless there is a complete and utter curveball where the dead wipe out the North and the rest of the show is White Walkers vs. Cersei? Anddd let me tell you the spinoff “Cersei” would be about as interesting and would work about as well as “Joey”. This directly relates to Jon, Arya, and Tormund and whether or not they live or die, as I alluded to above. If indeed mankind triumphs, why not keep Arya in the mix and try and cross a couple more names off her list when she makes it down south? Why not let the lovers/Aunt and Nephew go together? If Jon is still around he’ll need the Wildling army and to have that he needs Tormund’s influence. The fates of all those folks are intertwined.

That was emotional, I’m not going to lie. I have a buddy who is an actuary and I kind of feel like him right now. Hedging whether or not folks bite the bullet or not. But this is “Game Of Thrones”. This is what we signed up for. Valar Morghulis.

-Joey B.