New British Prime Minister Boris Johnson Has a 100 Trucking Rating

I probably watch more cable news than any of the other writers here at The 300s but I don’t follow European politics too closely, so I don’t know much about this new British Prime Minister. All I know is that I am intrigued by a world leader whose Trucking Rating would be higher than most NFL running backs.

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The fact that the new Prime Minister of the United Kingdom isn’t afraid to bulldoze an elementary schooler in a pick-up game is impressive. World leaders take note: Boris plays to win the game. He’s an OG member of the not-messing-around crew.

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I respect the hell out of Boris’s hustle. I’m the guy who runs out ground balls in adult softball leagues. (Maybe that’s why my brother-in-law’s team didn’t invite me back?) As a guy who has younger brothers, and as someone who worked as a summer camp counselor back in the day, I don’t believe in letting little kids win. What does that teach them? Make them earn it!

I once Dikembe Mutombo’d a kid in a pick-up basketball game. He cried. I felt bad.  But then he learned a very valuable lesson. The next time I went for a rebound in the corner I jammed my pinkie finger so bad my hand hurt for three weeks.  The lesson learned? Karma.

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I never blocked a kid again, and that kid learned the value of the pump fake.

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Only time will tell how well Boris’s playground experience prepared him for the world stage.

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