Tag: New England

Ryan Shazier Says He Will Play in the NFL Again and I Hope He Changes His Mind

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ESPN – In his first interview since suffering a severe spinal injury in early December, Steelers linebacker Ryan Shazier said he plans to play football again. “I’ve gotta get back, bro,” Shazier said on teammate Roosevelt Nix’s podcast, which was posted to social media Tuesday night. Shazier touched on several topics in the podcast, including his desire to become a Pro Football Hall of Famer. Shazier, 25, underwent spinal stabilization surgery Dec. 6 after a tackling attempt on Monday Night Football in Cincinnati left him clutching his lower back.

I respect the hell out of the resolve and I hope that this is a ‘prove it to myself’ thing where Shazier can just get back on the field and then retire. What I don’t want to see is the guy who suffered one of the worst injuries we’ve ever seen in the NFL just jump right back in after nearly being paralyzed. I thought for sure Shazier was paralyzed watching him writhe around on the ground while his legs were motionless. Thats the kinda stuff that makes you watch football with one eye closed. Its tough to watch honestly. Now these guys all know what they’re getting into and they’re getting paid millions of dollars so I’m not gonna lose any sleep over it, but at some point you have to protect people from themselves. Thats why the NFL has concussion spotters now. Whats a few million dollars if you literally can’t walk?

Quotes from Shazier like this worry me though:

“I just have to be back out there so everybody can see it. You know what I’m saying?”

“[Shazier] posted a picture of himself standing with Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger. He’s proud of that one. “People were thinking Ben was supporting me, too — he barely was even holding me.”

Is it hypocritical of me after having cheered on Tedy Bruschi coming back to the Patriots after suffering a goddamn stroke? Absolutely, but as athletes get bigger, faster, and stronger every year these injuries are going to become more prevalent not less. Thats why we’re seeing more and more players retire before the age of 30, including half of the 49ers last year.

Would I be bummed if Rob Gronkowski decides to trade in his football cleats for some spandex in the WWE? Of course, but I wouldn’t begrudge the guy. If you can make a bunch of money somewhere else without risking the car crash type injuries the NFL puts players through every week then you do you.

I can’t imagine how important it is for Shazier to prove that he can make it back to the NFL, especially for a guy that feels like he’s the absolute best player in the world at his position. I get that. Just don’t put blinders on and ignore the risks for the pursuit of glory on the gridiron.

Ron Borges, the Woodward to My Bernstein, Just Shot His Career to Hell With Fake Tom Brady Story

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So the internet is ablaze today with a hot take from Ron Borges that was shot out of the sky before I even got to my desk this morning. Literally. I was driving in listening to Kirk Minihane just DESTROY Ron Borges and I was wondering if it was just for past indiscretions (ya know like plagiarism) or if he did something else. Fired up a quick Twitter search while I was driving, I was in bumper to bumper traffic relax Mom, and whats the first thing I see? Ron Borges’ colleagues in the media openly mocking him for a fabricated rumor about Tom Brady planning to hold out for a new contract.

And on and on it goes.

All this before 9 AM. A couple of quick phone calls from guys like Tom E. Curran and they had already shot so many holes in the story that it wouldn’t get past the editor at a student newspaper. Yet somehow the Boston Fucking Herald ran with it.

Sure it was already taken off the website, but the newspapers (the paper versions all you old bastards absolutely have to have) were already on the stacks.

Pretty damning evidence for ya boy Ron. And thats before we even get into the details of *how* he reported this story. Again, according to Kirk and Callahan, basically some random guy got Borges’ phone number and started texting him pretending to be Tom Brady’s agent Don Yee.

Eventually fake-Don Yee tipped off Borges about the disgruntled Tom Brady and how he planned to hold out for Jimmy G type money and skip OTA’s. Huge right? So rather than picking up the phone and asking someone, anyone, for any kind of supporting evidence or even hearsay…rather than do any of that, Borges runs it for a front page column.

How does that get past an editor?

“Who’d you talk to, Ron? Some guy who’s identity you haven’t actually verified just texted you out of the blue with huge news? Print. That. Shit.”

Never rely on one source and never plagiarize. Those are the cardinal rules of journalism. Trust me, I have a degree in big-J Journalism. And Ron Borges has now broken both of them.

I’m not here to call for anyone’s job, but if we’re being honest, I’m calling for Ron Borges job. It’s one thing to write thinly veiled hit pieces and describe the team you cover with so much disdain for 30 years, its another to print something defamatory as fact because fucking Johnny from Weymouth sent you a text at 1 AM like its last call at the Harp.

When you become the real life Ron Burgundy, just reporting whatever you’re told, its time to go.

I Have Legitimately Grown Emotionally Attached to Tom Brady and Bill Belichick

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I have grown so emotionally attached to Tom Brady and Bill Belichick I don’t know what I’m going to do when (if) they ever retire. It was similar with David Ortiz; I grew up with these guys. Sure I remember watching the Pats get their teeth kicked in by Brett Favre and the Packers in Super Bowl XXXI when I was a youngling, but I wasn’t really a fully functioning human being until a few years later. We’ve experienced the highest of highs together like 2001 when they pulled off the greatest upset in SB history, going back to back in 2003-04 with the addition of veterans like Rodney Harrison and Corey Dillon to an already stacked team. Of course the Malcolm Butler interception and the 28-3 comeback against the Falcons. And I’ll never forget the lowest of lows. As they say, losing hurts more than winning feels good. The 2007 Super Bowl and David goddamn Tyree who probably sells car insurance now. Mario Manningham and that ridiculous catch in the 2011 Super Bowl. Sigh.

And then of course all the teams in between: the 2006 AFC Championship game collapse against Peyton Manning and the Colts, the 2010 home loss to Ray Rice and the Ravens, the AFC Championship game loss to Peyton Manning and the Broncos in the 2015 season.

I think thats why I literally have found myself becoming emotional these past couple of weeks. Last year it was Tom Brady nearly breaking down at Media Day before the Super Bowl when a little kid asked him who his hero was.

This year its Belichick wearing his dad’s hat to Minneapolis.

The other night I witnessed Tom fighting back tears in his Tom vs Time series when Mr. Kraft gave Tom’s mother a Super Bowl ring as she’s been kicking cancer’s ass. So much dust in my living room.

Its crazy because I’ve never met these guys, but I feel like they’re a part of my family and THAT is why all of this will never get old. People say oh you’ve won enough let someone else have a shot. Not a chance. As the infamous Don Draper once said. I’m not happy with 50% I want all of it.

These Are the Stakes the Patriots are Playing for in Super Bowl LII

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Its almost here. Its the last day of cube life before Super Bowl LII. We’ve had boots on the ground to bring you into the Super Bowl Experience, we’ve provided you with Patriots porn, we’ve got you ready to run through a wall for this team, now its time to really analyze this. What are the stakes? What are the Patriots really playing for here?

I for one will be leaving the office at 5:00 pm on the dot like one of the iron mill workers in the Simpsons.

Its officially Super Bowl weekend. Here are the stakes.

Tom Brady, Bill Belichick, and Robert Kraft are going for their 6th ring together.

Tom Brady is already the all-time winningest QB, he’s already stuffed Joe Montana in a locker. Now he’s looking to take the all-time GOAT title from Michael Jordan. And despite what that walking hot take Doug Gotleib says,

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A win on Sunday makes Tom Brady hands down the greatest athlete of all-time. Big Z already laid out the perfect rebuttal.

Bill Belichick is playing for a fresh paint job on his boat.

Historic radio calls. If the Patriots win Sunday, they HAVE to play the Gil Santos audio right? Like Bob Socci and Zolak have to just turn off their mics and play Gil’s call don’t they? “BACK TO BACK, THREE OUT OF FOUR!”

Tom vs Time will win a goddamn Emmy if it ends with 40 year old Tom Brady winning the league MVP and his 6th Super Bowl ring.

Similar to 2004, the Pats are expected to lose both their offensive and defensive coordinators this offseason, so winning back to back Super Bowls would be a hell of a way to go out for Patricia and McDaniels a la Romeo Crennel and Charlie Weis before them.

Do people realize that if the Patriots win it sets up an opportunity to conquer yet another NFL legendary record? No team in the history of the league has ever won 3 Super Bowls in a row? 19-0 will likely never happen and that absolutely breaks my heart, but winning back-to-back-to-back Super Bowls would likely never be matched.

The mental well being of the annual asshole who got the Super Bowl champions tattoo before the team actually plays the game:

Brady, Belichick and RKK getting up on that podium, accepting the Vince Lombardi Trophy and telling Seth Wickersham, Max Kellerman, Bart Scott, Dan Shaugnessy, and every other click-baiting miserable hater 4 beautiful words:

Some Patriots Porn Courtesy of Colin Cowherd to Get You Jacked Up for the Super Bowl

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Its difficult to see, hear, and read everything going on this week leading up to the Super Bowl, but this Colin Cowherd video below is an excellent use of your time. Cowherd goes into what makes the Patriots so damn successful; they’re a business operation.

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  • “When you watch a Patriots game there is a trust between the fans and the team; they’ll get it right.” [after bad losses] “They immediately fix it because thats what the academics do in life.”
  • “The Patriots are the billionaires of the NFL. They have created a system that is reliable, consistent, without emotion. They are capable of avoiding cultural issues, rule changes, and injuries. They’re not beholden to any one employee. And what they did yesterday is what they’ve been doing for years. A systematic consistent dependable product.”
  • “They don’t lead the NFL in penalties, they don’t fumble, they don’t get emotionally crazy, they adapt constantly and they drive you crazy. And I never grew up as a Patriots fan, but the Patriots aren’t a football operation, they are a business operation.”
    “Look at their Super Bowls, they are a David Tyree helmet catch from 6-1. They don’t blow anybody out. They never have. I’d argue in all seven Super Bowls they’ve been the least talented team, but they’re always the smartest, most reliable, most consistent, most prepared.”
  • “They are not a football team, they’re a business operation. They are boring. So is wealth.”

Dan Le Batard Takes a Shot at the Crown, Implies Tom Brady is On Steroids

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NESN – What Tom Brady is doing at age 40 defies all logic. The New England Patriots quarterback has a very real chance of finishing his age-40 season with an NFL MVP award, a Super Bowl MVP award and yet another Super Bowl championship. Most people attribute Brady’s incredible longevity to a combination of alternative wellness, all-time great coaching and, of course, skill. Some, like ESPN’s Dan Le Batard, wonder if there’s a more cynical theory, however. During Monday’s episode of “The Dan Le Batard Show,” the popular radio host essentially asked whether Brady is using performance-enhancing drugs. Le Batard tip-toed around the topic, and never specifically said “steroids” or PEDs,” but it was abundantly clear what he was talking about.

So Dan Le Batard took some time off from ugly crying on his own show to take a shot at the crown and insinuate Tom Brady is popping PEDs.

“And this is what I want to ask you: … When faced with a quarterback who is aging in a way that has no precedent in the history of aging, is there any particular reason that people aren’t questioning that?” Le Batard asked co-host Stugotz. “Man, we climbed into Peyton Manning … Peyton Manning doesn’t look the part on pharmaceuticals, and Al Jazeera was climbing around in his wife’s stuff, trying to get at the hormones. “And so what I’m asking you is, is it an unfair question to wonder whether, when facing something that has literally no precedent in the history of football or aging, to be like, ‘how?’“

What is Dan Le Batard even talking about here? We climbed into Peyton Manning? NO YOU DID NOT. This is exactly why people around here hate Peyton Manning. Guy got a total free pass from the media. The Peyton Manning comparison makes absolutely no sense. It was an absolute NON-STORY on ESPN, ya know Le Batard’s network, because the Manning Mafia hit the wrap it up box on that whole story real quick.

ESPN barely mentioned it and when they did they basically said, no you see Peyton wasn’t taking anything, his wife was just getting HGH shipments to a since-closed facility in a fucking strip mall in Indianapolis, even though they live in Denver.

And for the record, I don’t care if Peyton was taking horse tranquilizers from the Eastern Bloc. Do what you gotta do, especially if said remedies have you tossing 50+ TDs a year after a debilitating neck surgery.

I just know Brady would be on the cover of the New York Times and every other media outlet in the world would be screaming some nonsense about cheating if it came out he was having boxes of HGH shipped to Giselle.

Its times like these I need to remind myself and everyone around me to not do exactly what I’m doing right now and get all riled up. Tom Brady has 5 Super Bowl rings and people want to poke holes anywhere and everywhere they can. So Dan Le Batard, Rob Parker, and Max Kellerman can all go take a fat hike.

 

Tom Brady’s Hands Will Be Fine

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Tom Brady will be fine. Did you see his hands? They’re beautiful.  

Although I gotta say that press conference today made me a little nervous. TB12 shows up rocking gloves again and then dodges any questions about not only the injury, but he was noncommittal on even playing Sunday.

So Aaron Hernandez Was a Combination of Horrifying and Hilarious During His Time in Jail

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So this article describes Aaron Hernandez, unsurprisingly, as a terrifying combination of a 6’1″ 245 lbs gang member with a penchant for hilarity. Ya know, like an actual sociopath. It basically sums up his time in prison as Rorschach from Watchmen:

Horrifying.

“Hernandez was sent a care package of two dozen honey buns in violation of prison policy; before officers could confiscate the buns, he ate 20 of them, saving the wrappers so he couldn’t be accused of passing them to other inmates. Guards denied his request to eat the last four.”

Hilarious.

“He called one officer a “scared bitch” after the officer denied him an extra meal, and threatened to kill the officer and his family after he got out of prison. (“I did not say I was going to kill him or his family,” Hernandez later said. “I said if I see COs that act tough in jail, out of jail, I’m going to slap the [expletive] out of them.”)

Horrifying.

“Corrections Officer Joshua Pacheco noted the ways in which Hernandez would consistently seek to get under the officers’ skin: “He is constantly kicking his cell door and screaming at the top of his lungs, utilizing profanity at times when he wants something, regardless of how minuscule it is. It is not uncommon for Hernandez to kick his cell door constantly until an officer approaches his cell merely to ask the officer for the current time. This to him is comical, causing a disruption in normal operation within the unit.”

Hilarious.

“Hernandez had a variety of encounters with guards that tiptoed right up to the edge of threats: challenging guards’ manhood, hinting at dreams in which Hernandez had hunted the guards, and so forth. All in all, of the 10 months he was in the prison, Hernandez spent 120 days in solitary confinement. (According to a Yahoo Sports review of prison documents, Hernandez was charged with 99 disciplinary offenses and 24 major incidents during his nearly four years of prison time at two facilities.) Once, while guards were securing him in his cell, Hernandez beat his chest and defiantly proclaimed himself to be “tough. I’m built for this [expletive].”

Horrifying.

What an enigma Aaron Hernandez was.

So To Recap, Landon Collins Wants Eli Apple On His Team, Does Not Want Bill Belichick

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For a lot of football fans from my general age group, which I guess is to say people between the ages of about 26 – 33ish (?), one of the most beloved positions is that of the oversized Safety. As much as skill position players were revered growing up, men that could perform feats of athleticism on the football field that simply didn’t seem possible, there were also muscle-laden sentries patrolling the back end of a defense who were just as celebrated. They were there for the sole purpose of instilling the fear of death in those athletic touchdown seekers. There was John Lynch and Roy Williams. There was Brian Dawkins and Adrian Wilson. They were taller than other DBs. They were stronger than other DBs. They were there to hurt you.

A quick side note: This breed of safety is not to be confused with the new smaller LBs, often referred to as S/LB hyrbids, such as Deone Buccanon. Those guys are incredible but are just historically smaller Linebackers fitted into that position to adjust for the way athletic Tight Ends are used today, among other reasons.

Which brings us to Landon Collins, a player, as you can imagine, I have a great admiration for. He comes from that previous breed of SS. He is going to roam around in a zone, find you with the ball, and flick the hitstick upward as hard as humanly possible. He’s 6’0, about 220lbs, and doesn’t much care for the well-being of himself or others. It’s a delight.

There’s a caveat it seems though. When it comes to the business side of football, particularly who he’d want in his locker room, from an interpersonal angle, he’s a bit of a dumbass.

The Giants’, Geno Smith’s part-time team and Collins’ employer, have a Cornerback by the name of Eli Apple. He was drafted 10th overall, which is particularly high, last year out of Ohio State and proceeded to move to New York with his Mom, which may or may not be totally normal, to begin his successful NFL career. Not all went accordingly to plan. All of this season there were reports of Apple’s teammates resenting his attitude and effort. He seemed genuinely disliked and his play wasn’t exactly making up for his momma’s boy persona. Landon Collins, in his 3rd season and now a leader of not only the Giants but of the defense Apple also plays on, decided to publicly air out his grievances, saying that Apple needed to “grow up”. Although this isn’t something that someone like, I dunno, Bill Belichick, would want you to do, it’s a fairly boilerplate criticism. Things like this have been said before in the sports world and will be said again. One could have passed it off as Collins trying to use the media to motivate Apple.

Then Landon Collins doubled down. In late December, without naming Eli Apple but by singling him out by the power of deduction in naming other teammates, ole #21 straight up called Apple a “cancer” in an ESPN Radio interview. A “cancer”. The big “C”. Arguably the worst thing you could call a teammate. Being labelled a locker room cancer is a stink that sometimes never comes off a player. In my opinion it is the worst thing that can be on your athlete resume, on or off the field items included. However, Collins apologized to Apple. This was after a publicized meeting between him, the 2nd year corner, and DC Steve Spagnuolo. It seemed meaningful. It seemed they had turned a page. Collins even came out more recently and said he wants Eli Apple back his team, despite speculation that the Giants would cut the chord on the problem child. This is all great stuff. True Leadership from the receiver-seeking missile. Then, a plot twist.

Days after saying he wanted a guy he previously referred to as CANCER back on his team, Landon Collins, Professional Football Player, came out and said he wouldn’t want Bill Belichick as a coach. Collins said he’s too strict. He runs thing in a way that is not to Collins’ liking. That last part I get. As much as I love the jumbo sized Safeties of yore, they never did particularly care for things like “coverage” and “perfect tackling form”, things that Belichick has a soft spot in his heart, if not a hard on, for. The thing is, Bill Belichick is arguably the great coach of all time, and is definitely one of the most winning, and Eli Apple is an asshole who is bad at his job. Of Belichick, Collins actually said in that radio interview something along the lines of, and I’m paraphrasing, “ya it’s cool he wins and all, but…” That’s just plain problematic folks. When a leader of your D and someone that is often seen as very competitive makes a case to bring back the twerp he referred to as a 50/50 curable disease but doesn’t want this one guy to be his new coach because, even though he wins a fuckload, he’s a kinda strict, there is a huge issue in his thinking.

Everyone is entitled to his or her opinions. And when you are one of only a few, true Strong Safeties left in the NFL, I suppose you deserve the benefit of the doubt. If I were Landon Collins though, next time you take a clearly lesser parties side in an argument, don’t call them AIDS first. Bad look. Bad look indeed.