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Face/Off is Getting a Sequel for Some Reason and I am ALL IN

YahooFace/Off is officially getting a sequel! On Thursday, Deadline reported that a follow-up to the 1997 John Woo-directed thriller is in the works, with Godzilla vs. Kong director Adam Wingard set to helm the feature.

John Travolta and Nicolas Cage starred in the original action film, which follows the story of two enemies who take on each other’s identities — and faces.

Wingard will write the script with his scripting partner Simon Barrett, while Neal Moritz will produce the film for Paramount. David Permut will also serve as executive producer. It currently remains unclear if Travolta, 66, and Cage, 57, will reprise their roles of FBI agent Sean Archer and terrorist Castor Troy, respectively, or if the parts will be recast.

I read this story the other day, but this is most definitely a Friday type blog. One of the most critically personally acclaimed good-bad movies of all-time, Face/Off, is getting a sequel for some reason and I am ALL IN.

Face/Off is a 1997 John Woo directed completely over the top, preposterous, gloriously ridiculous action movie that does not get the respect it deserves. It is pure 90’s trash in the best possible way. It’s an unblinkingly serious guns blazing action movie that almost seems like a parody, but it has two of the biggest actors of our generation acting their asses off. Simply put, this movie is a RIDE.

The most underrated aspect of Face/Off though is John Travolta and Nicolas Cage both having to act like each other so you get a ton of Travolta going completely manic a la traditional Cage. And even better you then get Nic Cage pretending to be Travolta in Cage’s body, who in turn is pretending to be Cage so he’s not discovered as an imposter. It’s an absurd concept that falls apart pretty quickly when you think about it too hard.

So don’t think, just enjoy.

Thankfully the director clarified that this is in fact a direct sequel and not a remake of sorts like that abomination of a Point Break reboot from a few years back.

It would be a shame to not have Travolta and Cage both back for this, but it wouldn’t surprise me. However Cage has shown he has no qualms making ANYTHING if he’s getting paid and Travolta is coming off some bombs like the Gotti movie so maybe it’s the perfect storm.

On the other hand, this spin-off wouldn’t be a bad idea either.

Red Sox Tried to Give Jason Varitek’s Number 33 to Martin Perez, Who Said Hell No

Yahoo – No Boston Red Sox player has worn Jason Varitek’s No. 33 jersey since the former captain retired in 2011. So when the Red Sox appeared to give the number away on Tuesday, it sparked some drama.

Red Sox Stats noted on Twitter that the Red Sox official roster changed Perez’s number from 54 to 33, which the 29-year-old wore with the Texas Rangers and Minnesota Twins. Varitek’s wife, Catherine, caught wind of the news and did not take kindly to it.

Apparently, it was news to Perez too. The Red Sox left-hander, who re-signed with the team last month, made it clear he has no desire to take Varitek’s No. 33 and will stick with 54.

I know Jason Varitek probably isn’t a candidate for having his number retired as a career.256 hitter, but he was just the 4th team captain since 1923 (the only one since Jim Rice) and the Red Sox nearly gave away Tek’s No. 33 WHILE HE IS WORKING FOR THE TEAM! I’m not here to argue that Varitek should have his number up next to Big Papi and Pedro, but he was a foundational piece of the most successful era in Red Sox history, is the only catcher to call four no-hitters, wore the red “C” for 7 years, and kicked A-Rod’s ass in the most famous fight in team history. So how about we don’t just hand out his number to random pitchers? This is even more insulting than the time the Sox finally gave away Nomar’s No. 5 to Rocco Baldelli.

Shoutout to Martin Perez though for having the self awareness to immediately say no shot in hell am I wearing No. 33 at Fenway Park.

Listen, the team doesn’t have to officially retire Varitek’s number to properly honor his legacy. The man is in the Red Sox Hall of Fame and is currently being groomed by the franchise for a potential future manager role, even if it’s not here, but don’t just give away 33 while he’s literally still in the building.

ICYMI the Bruins Are Playing Outdoors at Lake Tahoe This Weekend

NBC Sports – We’re just a few days away from the Boston Bruins’ most aesthetically-pleasing game of the season. The Bruins will travel to Lake Tahoe on Sunday to take on the Philadelphia Flyers as part of the NHL Outdoors series. Bruins-Flyers will follow Colorado Avalanche vs. Vegas Golden Knights on Saturday, which means outdoor hockey is right around the corner.

The rink is being constructed a stone’s throw from Lake Tahoe on the 18th green of the Edgewood Tahoe Resort golf course, and it’s a sight to behold.

The NHL Outdoors at Lake Tahoe is going to be a spectacular made-for-TV event. I’ve been to a Winter Classic and no matter where they play the sight lines as a fan in attendance are anywhere from awful to mediocre. The TV experience is usually pretty cool with some highlights being the Penguins playing under the snow in the first WC

The Bruins playing at Fenway was an awesome TV experience as well. I’ve been to Frozen Fenway where I saw some college hockey games there so I know the sight lines are terrible, but I remember the whole neighborhood was bumping for the Winter Classic as I walked around hung over as all hell on New Years Day.

But after a while the outdoor games at football and baseball stadiums became kind of overdone. I completely blame the NHL for this because they took something they created out of thin air that became hockey royalty in the Winter Classic and bastardized it by then playing like 5 outdoor games every season. The Stadium Series? FOH.

So the pandemic presented an opportunity for the NHL as teams playing in front of empty football stadiums didn’t seem like a prime aesthetic. The solution?

Lake Tahoe.

A legitimately awesome idea from a league that isn’t exactly known for marketing their sport all that well. With little to no fans allowed in the stands, why not just double down on the TV experience and put a rink in front of the picture perfect pond hockey back drop?

AND the Bruins will finally be breaking out their brand new reverse retro yellow jerseys, which are going to look absolutely money outdoors.

This must be a logistical nightmare because it’s not like they’re just pulling a couple nets out onto the lake and playing some puck. The NHL is constructing a full fledged hockey rink in the middle of nowhere and as Billy Jaffe pointed out on Toucher and Rich this AM, most Winter Classics are hosted at massive professional sports arenas that are in major cities with ya know, electrical power grids.

So major props to the NHL for thinking outside of the box because I can’t wait to watch this on Sunday and that’s something hockey needs people to be saying more of these days.

Red Sox Trade Former Top Prospect Andrew Benintendi to the Royals

I know using “former top prospect” to describe a 26-year-old that just got dumped by his current team is a tale as old as time, but I’m pretty down on this move considering the return. Just a year after signing Andrew Benintendi to a relatively inexpensive 2-year $10M extension, the Sox decided to part ways with the former No. 7 overall pick. Granted, I have not been studying my Baseball Prospectus manual so I know nothing about the guys they got in return except that they are also underperforming castoffs from their previous teams.

In return for Benintendi the Red Sox received OF Franchy Cordero and pitcher Josh Winckowski, both of whom I’m not too familiar with. It kiiiind of seems like the Sox are just throwing shit against the wall though hoping they can catch lightning in a bottle with another team’s failed projects.

“I guess you never know, but the odds seem slim that the tools will ever come together. Maybe the Red Sox see something they believe they can fix, but the scouting reports on Cordero have always mentioned that he simply scores low in his natural baseball instincts.” – David Schoenfield, ESPN

Tony Mazz was not very fond of the return either.

In fairness to the Red Sox, Winckowski sounds like he has a chance. And let me emphasize – a CHANCE. He won’t be 23 until June. He’s 6-foot-4 and 202 pounds. In 54 career minor-league games – 53 starts – he has a 3.35 ERA with 237 strikeouts and 86 walks in 263 innings. But he’s also been traded twice already…Cordero doesn’t sound like much of a baseball player. When I read his profile, the first name I thought of was Wily Mo Pena, a physically imposing power hitter whom the Red Sox acquired in 2006. He basically lasted a year here before they became the second team to give up on his “potential,” which is a dirty word in sports. It’s a euphemism for “underachiever.” There’s nothing worse than a great athlete who doesn’t have the skills to play baseball. And Cordero doesn’t feel like much of a ball player.

Not to mention this deal happened one year to the day of the Mookie Betts trade. This franchise really should just teach a PR masterclass because there’s always drama surrounding every single move they make.

Maybe it’s elite foresight from Chaim Bloom and he’s seeing what nobody else sees…which is exactly why John Henry hired him. BUT, Benintendi is literally less than a full season removed from being a pretty good and promising young player. In fairness that was two years ago, but with a Covid shortened 2020 season shortened even further due to injuries + the 2019 season Benintendi is only 152 games removed from finishing 2018 hitting .290/.366/.465 with 16 HR, 41 doubles, and 21 Stolen Bases. You can’t tell me that guy just forgot how to play ball.

To make matters worse the Sox are even paying a little over $2M of Benintendi’s salary just for the Royals to take him. Making a little over $6 million this season, Benintendi would be arbitration eligible in 2022 and become a free agent in 2023. It would appear Bloom saw no future for Benny with the Sox so decided to get something in return while he still could.

If you’re feeling a bit, well, underwhelmed by this offseason then you my friend are not alone. When the biggest moves of the offseason are signing OF Hunter Renfroe to a 1-year $3M deal, Kike Hernandez (a nice utility player) to a 2-year $14M deal and RHP Garrett Richards (who is always hurt) to a one year $10M deal, fans have a right to be less than enthused. With Chris Sale out until at least mid-season while he recovers from Tommy John, the Sox have done almost nothing to improve the roster that finished with one of the worst records in team history last season.

Obviously the Red Sox are looking at 2021 as a bridge year while they try to get as far under the luxury tax as possible. Even Dustin Pedroia’s $13.75M AAV still counts against the luxury tax despite retiring so Bloom appears to be resetting the roster before hopefully jumping back into free agency next offseason. This is the kind of stuff that Theo Epstein used to preach, you can’t compete for a World Series and spend big in free agency, and trade prospects every year. It’s just not sustainable. So I understand that, but this franchise does feel a little rudderless. Especially for a franchise that changes its organizational philosophy every 2 years. I can take a down year or two if the team has a legitimate plan in place, but that blueprint remains to be seen if we’re being honest. At the start of next season the Sox will have their two best players in Xander Bogaerts entering his age-29 season and Rafael Devers entering his age-25 season so both guys will be in their prime. Now all Bloom has to do is build an entire roster of players around them in the next 15 months. No pressure.

Say what you want about Benintendi, but he still has the potential to be an All-Star and let us never forget him saving the ALCS for the Red Sox against Houston en route to the 2018 championship. Best of luck to ya in KC, Benny.

Just a Little Avocado Tequila Shirt On Sale Now!

Nothing to see here, just a little Avocado Tequila. Buy Now!

Tom Brady getting day drunk on the river, tossing the Lombardi Trophy from boat to boat is giving me all sorts of FOMO while I sit at my desk with a space heater freezing my ass off wishing the Patriots could find players like that. Either way, the must have t-shirt of 2021 has arrived. Buy Now!

Tom Brady May Have Had a Few Cocktails at the Bucs Super Bowl Parade

THAT’S MY QUARTERBACK!

Tom Brady is HAMMERED and I love it. Throw in some of those forbidden nightshades and this man seems prepared to go on a Mike Napoli-esque bender.

As an adult with a fully functioning brain I am here to tell you the only thing better than day drinking is day drinking on a boat floating down the river. I’ve done the whole pontoon thing a couple of times in Chicago, which is the poor person equivalent of a Super Bowl boat parade, but it is the only way to drink in the summer. Not to mention Tom rolled up in his own $2 million dollar boat like an absolute legend.

I have to admit, I’ve been to a bunch of championship parades, albeit normally while freezing my ass off, so I’m not gonna complain, BUT this 80 degree boat parade seems like the way to do it.

Brady deserves to really let loose like this. His mentor/boss/coach for the last 20 years essentially forced him out of town because he thought he was done. So Brady goes down to Florida, becomes the de facto player-coach, makes the playoffs, goes through Drew Brees, Aaron Rodgers, and Patrick Mahomes, wins the Super Bowl, and yet another SB MVP. As I said the other day, I don’t think it’s humanly possible to feel more vindicated than Tom Brady feels right now. So enjoy this parade my man, you just dragged the corpse of a loser franchise to the pinnacle of football and somehow reached yet another level of personal legacy. The GOAT, indeed.

Oh and yes, everyone in or around this massive, maskless aquatic celebration is probably going to get Covid.

#RushHourRap – Nelly – Here Comes the Boom

I’ve been on an Adam Sandler kick the past week and wound up getting sucked into the surprisingly rewatchable The Longest Yard, which I probably haven’t watched more than 5 minutes of since it came out. It is peak 2005 with Sandler at the tail end of his white hot streak, Nelly at the height of his powers, and cameos from a somewhat recently retired Michael Irvin, Stone Cold Steve Austin, D12, Big Boy, and of course friend of the blog William Fitchner. What really makes it scream 2005 though is the fire flames soundtrack from Nelly himself in a song that was a YouTube hype video staple back in the day, “Here Comes the Boom.”

#RushHourRap – Atmosphere – God’s Bathroom Floor

I did not realize this song was somehow 25 years old. “God’s Bathroom Floor” is a track that bounced around for a while before finding an official home on the Overcast! EP, but it never made the cut on the actual album. “Introspective raps over a jazzy hypnotic melody” also may be the best way I’ve ever heard to describe Atmosphere.

Initially written and recorded when Atmosphere and fledgling label Rhymesayers Entertainment were still making a name for themselves in the Minneapolis hip-hop scene, “God’s Bathroom Floor” was an early standout for the group. Turning heads and drawing new fans in with Slug’s introspective raps over a jazzy hypnotic melody produced by Stress, the song was performed live frequently, quickly becoming an audience favorite before ever appearing on an actual release. Even then, it was only a live performance they made available, and only on a limited mixtape they released in 1996. It would be another year before the 4-track studio recording would surface on Atmosphere’s Overcast! EP—a collection of focus tracks promoting their debut full-length album—but “God’s Bathroom Floor” never made it onto the album itself and slowly slipped into obscurity from there.@Atmosphere

Dustin Pedroia Announces His Retirement

NESN Dustin Pedroia is calling it a career. The Boston Red Sox second baseman announced his retirement from Major League Baseball on Monday. Pedroia, who dealt with knee injuries over the latter part of his career, played in just nine games over the last three seasons. He did not play in 2020.

“Dustin is so much more than his American League Most Valuable Player award, his All-Star Game selections, and the Gold Gloves he amassed throughout his impressive 17-year career in our organization,” Red Sox owner John Henry said in a press release.

“Dustin came to represent the kind of grit, passion, and competitive drive that resonates with baseball fans everywhere and especially with Red Sox fans. He played the game he loves in service to our club, its principles and in pursuit of championships. Most of all we are forever grateful to him for what he brought to our club and to our region as an important role model showing all of us how much one can accomplish with determination and hard work.”

We all knew this day was coming and is something that had been discussed more openly in the last couple of years as Pedroia battled debilitating knee injuries. Once I heard Jerry Remy during a game tell the story of Pedroia asking him what kind of flooring he had in his house because the hardwood was killing his knees I knew his playing days were likely over. He is one of the greatest players in Red Sox history and will almost certainly have his number 15 retired as a 4x All-Star, 4x Gold Glove winner, 1x Silver Slugger, Defensive Player of the Year, Rookie of the Year, an MVP award, and three World Series rings.

As a career .299 career hitter with all the aforementioned hardware, Pedroia’s retirement is bittersweet because it’s another Nomar “what could’ve been” story. Like Nomar a decade before him, if Pedroia didn’t get hurt and have his career derailed by constant injuries he could’ve been a legitimate Hall of Famer. If you ask me I will forever say fuck Manny Machado for the dirty slide that basically ended Pedroia’s career, but Pedey has never (publicly) faulted Machado and has even been quite open about how he’d rather play his ass off and risk his body than half ass it just to add a few years to his career.

It all started with the Machado dirtbag slide in Pedroia’s already surgically repaired left knee in April 2017, but there was also the Jose Abreu collision in May 2017 that sent him to the DL, when he went back on the DL in August 2017 I was spooked, then he had another knee surgery in October 2017, he returned in 2018 but was back on the DL by June, in July 2018 we asked Is This the End for Dustin Pedroia, he then returned for Opening Day in 2019, and then by September 2019 it was pretty clear Pedroia was done.

But I don’t want you to leave this blog pissed off lamenting the past because I want to celebrate not only his greatness on the field, but how genuinely awesome a dude Dustin Pedroia is so here are a few of my favorite stories.

The Brady Quinn Ping Pong Story

“Yeah, he’s one of a kind,” Roberts says. “He and I work out at the same place in Arizona in the off-season, and I’ve seen him call out NFL players during Ping-Pong games, asking them when they’re starting Jenny Craig. He told Brady Quinn, who is a monster, a physical specimen, ‘I’m going to rip this ball right off your throat.’ He’s a piece of work.”

“Ask Jeff Fucking Francis who I am!”

But clearly he is a player that is not only beloved by fans, but he is revered by teammates including the all-time greats like Big Papi.

And in a statement from former Red Sox closer Jonathan Papelbon comes a quote that I may just have to slap on a t-shirt: “Diamonds are forever and so is Dustin Pedroia.”

Above all Dustin Pedroia was a hilarious, hard working, regular ass dude which is why he was beloved in the city of Boston. In a career full of A+ soundbites, I leave you with just a few of his classic stories.