This reminds me of a few years ago when the United States Postal Service was so underwater financially that they started selling the shit mailmen wore to deliver your mail. Legit USPS hats like the one below. And goddamnit I’ll never forgive myself for not copping one.
I don’t know why I love retarded merch I just do. Maybe its that top notch public school education. Come on YOU CAN EVEN BUY THE COLONEL’S TIE!
But of course the one thing I truly need, this absolutely baller poster print of the Colonel counting stacks, is sold out. Goddamnit. It’s like the USPS hat incident all over again.
Star Tribune — Green Heinz ketchup? Fat-free Pringles? Colgate frozen lasagna? You don’t need to be an expert to know these products weren’t successful.
Which is why these creations, with dozens of others, feature in the new Museum of Failure, a wacky parade of rejected products from years gone by set up in the Swedish town of Helsingborg.
They should have just named this place the “Museum of Products Millenials will Revive.” Millennials are constantly catching heat for killing archaic department stores and uninspired chain restaurants, but where’s the credit for bringing back Crystal Pepsi, Surge and Zima?
The time feels just about right for green ketchup to make a comeback. I can imagine the conversations going on at Heinz right now:
Barbecue sauce is getting too much attention these days. We were late on the bacon craze with our bacon flavored ketchup. How can we steal back market share? LET’S BRING BACK GREEN KETCHUP!
Pepsi better hope this place doesn’t have a New Coke exhibit. A couple of #tbt posts of it on Instagram and Twitter would definitely lead to a Facebook group DEMANDING Coke give it another try. As long as the New Coke marketing campaign isn’t also on display…
The New Coke marketing campaign could be in the Museum of Failure or the Museum of Ads that Didn’t Age Well. Take your pick.
But it’s not just food!
Even President Donald Trump makes an appearance.
The “I’m Back And You’re Fired” board game from 2004 looks like Monopoly, but players use “T” branded pieces and the paper notes are adorned with Trump’s image.
“It’s a boring version of Monopoly. It’s simplified so stupid people can play it, but it’s also horribly boring,” West says.
I’ve seen the 2008 The Office Trivia Game at every Five Below for almost a decade. I’m shocked that this game never ended up there. It must really suck.
Nostalgia is big these days, so I don’t think this museum will be a failure. I just hope we get one in the states some day. I can’t wait to line up for tickets in a lobby decorated with AOL CDs.
I went into Starbucks wanting to hate the Midnight Mint Mocha Frappuccino. Coffee shops are for adults, not for children. I don’t have time to wait in line behind middle schoolers ordering $6 chocolate milks when I’m on my way to the office. I catch grief from coworkers making coffee runs when I ask for flavored iced coffee. I can’t support this kind of nonsense.
But my god this drink was delicious.
Allegedly there is coffee is in thing, but I didn’t taste any. It tasted like a dark chocolate milkshake with mint. It had whipped cream in the middle and on top. It was better than any milkshake I’ve ever had at McDonald’s, and Starbucks will never be able to tell you “the machine isn’t working” when you order the Midnight Mint Mocha Frappuccino.
I’d say the price of this is drink is one if its few downsides, but I’m a grown ass man. If I want a dark chocolate mint milkshake, I can afford $5.45, plus tax. The real downside of this drink to a grown ass man is its nutrition facts. The Midnight Mint Mocha Frappuccino packs 570 calories into a venti, along with 64 grams of sugar (8 grams of protein, though!). Long gone are the days where I could throwback whatever I wanted without looking at the nutrition facts. I’m not 27 any more.
The Midnight Mint Mocha Frappuccino is not something I would recommend drinking more than a few times this summer, but I definitely recommend trying it at least once. Just make sure your in the mood for ice cream and not coffee.
USA Today – The days of getting your fingers dirty while sopping up toppings with fries are over.
McDonald’s unveiled a “uselessly useful” utensil called a “frork” Monday in a hilarious infomercial hosted by McDonald’s Chef Mike and pitchman Anthony Sullivan. The frork is essentially a fork, but with French fries.
The frork was released as part of the rollout of McDonald’s new Signature Crafted Recipe Sandwiches… The frork will be available while supplies last at participating restaurants on May 5 with the purchase of a Signature Crafted Recipe sandwich.
The frork is only the fourth most outrageous thing in this infomercial. As a matter of fact, I think it’s pretty damn clever. I’m not one to waste the lettuce and sauce that falls out of my Big Mac. That’s Big Mac Salad. The frork will help me eat my Big Mac Salad in a more civilized manner.
The most outrageous parts of this infomercial are the Signature Crafted Recipe sandwiches. I’m sure they’ll be delicious, but I’ll be damned if I can think of a good reason why they need to be on the menu in the first place. Chef Mike seems like a good guy, but McDonald’s doesn’t strike me as the type of place to go to for Pico Guacamole or artisan bacon. That’s why I loved the Mac Jr. and Grand Mac – stick to your strengths and play to your base.
If I have to buy a Signature Crafted Recipe sandwich to get a frork, so be it. But the frork is definitely more useful than the sandwich.
PS – Good thing this infomercial dropped on May 1 and not April 1. Definitely would not have believed this a month ago.
First off, before we get into this review, props to Dunkies for actually trying something new for a change. I don’t know how many more shitty breakfast sandwich variations I can take on different types of old bread. But, back to the Monster Energy Punch. It would seem Dunkies is looking to crack into the market of under 30 that may prefer Red Bulls to black coffees. Or the Friday night Allston pre-game crowd. Same thing, I guess.
I think the best way to describe this is probably…….pure poison. I am not a health nut by any means, when I’m at the dentist getting my 8th cavity filled I know why and I have no regrets. But, when I first ordered the thing I was a little unsettled when they slapped a Double Gulp down on the table. No sizes to choose from; this is the one you get. This is 64 ounces of pure sugar so theres no dipping your toes in the water here. Hold you nose and dive in.
Lets go through a timeline of events just to give a little perspective.
8:15 am: Went with the Blue Raspberry. First sip? Actually not terrible. Its pretty sweet, but I mean thats to be expected when you mix a can of Monster (using the green flavor over the sugar free blue can is where this starts to go wrong) with a goddamn fruit Coolatta.
Theres probably some chemical warfare going on in my liver right now, but I am pretty jacked up from the Dunkin Monster Energy punch at 8 am
8:30 am: Took a few sips of this behemoth on my drive to work, but immediately its apparent that this is not a drink you’re going to chug, no matter how badly you need a caffeine fix.
8:50 am: I am feeling the buzz. I highly doubt its the caffeine. As a habitual abuser of energy drinks, I know this shit is not energy. This is a sugar high felt only by the likes of a toddler on Halloween. Alright, lets ride this out.
9:10 am: I am starting to question my life choices. I’ve drank maybe 10% of the Monster Energy Punch and the buzz is already starting to fade.
9:20 am: I am full on hungover from sugar and hesitant to put any more of this concoction in my body.
Update: Your @DunkinDonuts scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should. pic.twitter.com/sXwqtNOB1w
9:45 am: We have thrown in the white flag. Do not want. Get this shit out of my face as fast as possible.
While I tip my hat to Dunkies for jumping into something new with both feet, holy hell how did this make it past the fucking test kitchen?
This is unsurprisingly a diabetes BOMB and you would have to be a degenerate to put down the entire Gatorade cooler worth of punch they give you. Can’t recommend it, but if you choose to tackle this drink you do so at your own risk. I still love Dunkin, guy.
The 300s 