Tag: Pittsburgh

ICYMI the Bruins Are Playing Outdoors at Lake Tahoe This Weekend

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NBC Sports – We’re just a few days away from the Boston Bruins’ most aesthetically-pleasing game of the season. The Bruins will travel to Lake Tahoe on Sunday to take on the Philadelphia Flyers as part of the NHL Outdoors series. Bruins-Flyers will follow Colorado Avalanche vs. Vegas Golden Knights on Saturday, which means outdoor hockey is right around the corner.

The rink is being constructed a stone’s throw from Lake Tahoe on the 18th green of the Edgewood Tahoe Resort golf course, and it’s a sight to behold.

The NHL Outdoors at Lake Tahoe is going to be a spectacular made-for-TV event. I’ve been to a Winter Classic and no matter where they play the sight lines as a fan in attendance are anywhere from awful to mediocre. The TV experience is usually pretty cool with some highlights being the Penguins playing under the snow in the first WC

The Bruins playing at Fenway was an awesome TV experience as well. I’ve been to Frozen Fenway where I saw some college hockey games there so I know the sight lines are terrible, but I remember the whole neighborhood was bumping for the Winter Classic as I walked around hung over as all hell on New Years Day.

But after a while the outdoor games at football and baseball stadiums became kind of overdone. I completely blame the NHL for this because they took something they created out of thin air that became hockey royalty in the Winter Classic and bastardized it by then playing like 5 outdoor games every season. The Stadium Series? FOH.

So the pandemic presented an opportunity for the NHL as teams playing in front of empty football stadiums didn’t seem like a prime aesthetic. The solution?

Lake Tahoe.

A legitimately awesome idea from a league that isn’t exactly known for marketing their sport all that well. With little to no fans allowed in the stands, why not just double down on the TV experience and put a rink in front of the picture perfect pond hockey back drop?

AND the Bruins will finally be breaking out their brand new reverse retro yellow jerseys, which are going to look absolutely money outdoors.

This must be a logistical nightmare because it’s not like they’re just pulling a couple nets out onto the lake and playing some puck. The NHL is constructing a full fledged hockey rink in the middle of nowhere and as Billy Jaffe pointed out on Toucher and Rich this AM, most Winter Classics are hosted at massive professional sports arenas that are in major cities with ya know, electrical power grids.

So major props to the NHL for thinking outside of the box because I can’t wait to watch this on Sunday and that’s something hockey needs people to be saying more of these days.

It Would Appear the Patriots Are Digging Their Heels In On Antonio Brown

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I woke up today, as you all did, to yet another news story of Antonio Brown being an absolute moron and allegedly intimidating an accuser of his.

Has this guy never seen The Town before?

Live look at AB’s lawyer:

The craziest part is that the Patriots seem to be digging their heels in on the matter. Its one thing to bring in a guy who just seemed to be a mercurial diva wide receiver and then get caught with your pants down regarding the civil case, as they reportedly did. Its another matter to have him allegedly intimidating his own accusers while on the Patriots active roster. Everybody knows the Patriots are better than The Cleaners in John Wick when it comes to cleaning up a mess and putting a player on the straight and narrow.

But most of those players in question were just diva a-hole football players. Antonio Brown seems to be at best a child who’s never been told no and a scumbag at worst. Most of these things are still just allegations so no one is legally required to do anything, but Bill Belichick in particular seems to be losing his touch with the media. For the second time Bill got visibly frustrated and walked out of a press conference when peppered with Antonio Brown questions.

I didn’t expect Belichick to actually talk about AB’s legal situation, but I never expected him to noticeably get his back up and storm off the podium like he’s done now twice.

Why then is the team willing to put up with all the bullshit?

Former Patriot turned sports talk radio host Ted Johnson as well as MMQB reporter Bert Breer have both theorized that Belichick is putting up with whatever he has to with AB because he knows Brown can help him chase the won thing thats always alluded him; 19-0.

Its only Week 3 so 19-0 is fun to talk about and its easy to turn a blind eye for most Patriots fans, but these stories are piling up at an alarming rate for a team that didn’t have a dire need for Brown. If the Pats are 1-1 its probably a lot easier for Bill to just say fuck it and cut bait, but is he holding onto Brown for an all out attempt at going undefeated? I don’t know, but I do know its getting harder to defend the silence from the team.

I was never going to defend the move *or* AB because he clearly is out to lunch, but how long will the team, and Robert Kraft specifically, take heat on behalf of an employee who hasn’t even been around long enough to play a home game yet?

Anddddd Now the Raiders Intend to Suspend Antonio Brown

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What a fucking saga. I mean what is even happening.

In case it was even remotely up for debate, Antonio Brown, and more specifically his head, is now in sole possession of the “Diva/Pain In Ass Wide Receiver” crown. He has surpassed Keyshawn Johnson, who felt it both worthy of his time and wise to write a book, mid-career, called “Give Me The Damn Ball.” He has also surpassed the WR whose name I won’t even utter he was such an asshat, but I’ll say he notably played  for the 9ers, Eagles, and Bengals, stopped getting signed because he’s such an asshole, and then went broke.

And now we have AB. His VERY successful and ultimately lucccrative time with the Steelers ended because he got pissed they drafted another talent and the ball was getting spread around. Keep in mind this resulted in Brown catching over 1,200 yards and a career high 15 TDs. But fuck them right? So he got in an argument with Big Ben, who he may or may not have hated anyway, got benched at the end of the year, and got traded to Oakland.

THEN THINGS JUST GOT STRAIGHT UP WEIRD. First, he froze-torched (look it up it’s a word) his toes almost clear off misusing a cryotherapy chamber. Not great, but ok. A dumb, dumb move but not a malicious or intentional act. However, what seems like mere moments later, the NFL decides his BELOVED helmet of choice (???!!) is now out of code and he has to get a new one. No biggie right? BIG WRONG MY FRIEND. See, AB can’t even imagine taking the field without this one particular helmet. So he sits out. During his first season with the team. Because of the helmet. And he obviously cannot practice not wearing one. Eventually he, the team, the NFL, I don’t know who else come to an agreement on a helmet he can use. All is forgiven. Except not.

Now, the thing is, the Raiders could not have cared less what means of head protection Brown used so these missed practices were not excused. So he was fined. Something to the tune of 50k. He’s making something like 18 mil a year I think, he can afford it right? EVEN BIGGER WRONG BUDDY OL’ PAL. At this point, AB posts on IG about the team “hating” on him and some other indiscernible shit. Who knows at this point.

Welp, I guess today Raiders’ GM Mike Mayock, noted drafted expert and very much not noted football exec, confronted AB about these posts and probably every other fucking stunt he’s pulled this offseason and they got into it. Gave each other the business if you will. Had at it. This exchange of pleasantries went so off the rails that the team is now SUSPENDING ANTONIO BROWN only six months after trading for him and before he plays a single regular season snap for them (in his new helmet). What a Goddam world. And as twitter said (I think Schefter said but no research as always) this thing is NOT over. We could honestly see Antonio Brown, top 5 receiver in the league, get traded again this year. Can you imagine that?! Even Keyshawn and Dickhead Who Shall Not Be Named weren’t so insufferable two teams shipped them in one year. But it could happen here.

This is just such a disaster of a situation. I can’t imagine who would even be takers in such a trade scenario. I guess the Raiders and AB will both hope this all just freezes over (LMFAO).

-Joey B.

PS: You know who has never been suspended from his own team for pure dickshiterry?  Josh Gordon.

Patrick Mahomes Links Up With Troy Polamalu for Commercial; Also, There is Zero Percent Chance Patrick Mahomes Knows Who Troy Polamalu Is

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This is where I’m starting to show my age as a rapidly aging millennial like some sort of reverse Benjamin Button. Patrick Mahomes is a stud, a Madden cover athlete, and a guy that almost stopped Tom Brady from returning to yet another Super Bowl, but he’s only 23. Troy Polamalu is one of the greatest defensive players in the history of the game, but he’s only 38 years old (side note: how many retired athletes look at TB12 and wish they stuck to QB?) and retired after the 2014 season, 3 years before Mahomes was even drafted, and well past his prime of the late 2000s.

My point being, unless Mahomes was a Madden fiend there is a very real chance he doesn’t even know who Troy Polamalu is. Video games are the only reason I can name the top 30 soccer players in the world from 2009-2010. I like soccer, but Xbox and booze fueled FIFA tournaments are so burned into my brain that I still hear “Schweinsteiger!” in my head any time I watch a game.

…well after doing the math, Polamalu was the best safety in the game and NFL Defensive Player of the Year in 2010, when Mahomes was 15 so if he was watching ball in high school it lines up, but doesn’t make me feel any better about being 30.

Dread It, Run From It, Pirates’ Joe Musgrove’s Infinity Gauntlet Glove Arrives All the Same

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Dread it, run from it, destiny arrives all the same.

Despite having all 6 Infinity Stones at their disposal, Joe Musgrove and the Pirates are still in last place and 13 games out of the playoffs.

This is an A+ glove design though and just goes to show how much more exposure MLB could gain amongst younger viewers if they just lightened up a little bit. Obviously this glove would never fly in a real game, but Musgrove was allowed to break it out for Players Weekend. Normally Players Weekend is basically just an excuse for the MLB to act like a couple wild and crazy guys…

…by putting nicknames on the back of team jerseys.

That is of course unless you are a humorless stiff who hates fun like the Yankees’ Brett Gardner, who simply put “Gardner” on the back of his Players Weekend jersey.

He’s probably a fun guy to talk to at parties.

Anyways, if MLB would relax some of its stuffier rules, let players express themselves, and oh maybe chill out with the Gestapo social media policy that takes down every video that makes its way onto the internet, then they would be on to something. I will say, as bad as MLB is at social media, no one is worse than FIFA. I’ve only gotten two C&D’s in my Twitter career and they both came from FIFA after tweeting out videos of players scoring and celebrating. The horror.

 

Reds Pitcher Amir Garrett Started a BRAWL and Yasiel Puig (Who Had Just Been Traded) Was Ready to Throw Hands

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Yasiel Puig can drink from my canteen anytime. The dude just got traded so he technically wasn’t even on the Reds anymore yet he was still ready to throw hands.

Since we’re in the trust tree I’ll admit that the older I’ve gotten the more I’ve soured on baseball fights. It’s usually a bunch of dudes who’ve never thrown a punch in their lives just throwing their gloves at each other and flailing away. Last season’s Joe Kelly brawl was the exception.

But, THIS was different. So when an actual fight breaks out with haymakers being thrown, all started by a pitcher literally turning into Leroy Jenkins, I am all the way in.

Hell even the managers got into the mix and ended up getting tackled to the ground.

Reds manager David Bell (who was previously ejected) had been wrestled to the ground by Pirates hitting coach Rick Eckstein after charging Pittsburgh manager Clint Hurdle, and nobody seemed convinced that this drama was actually over at all.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if it sparks up again. We don’t take lightly to what happened tonight and the way that they acted,” Bucs starter Joe Musgrove said. “The guy that’s running their team over there is the ringleader. You saw him come out and go right after our manager after being ejected. Who knows what’s going to happen down the line, but we definitely expect something to happen at some point. We’ll be ready for it.”

Also, shoutout to this cop who said fuck this I do not get paid enough to break up fights between millionaires, let them sort it out.

If baseball is going to thrive despite its pacing problem, length of games, umpire debates etc. etc. then some legitimate brewhahas couldn’t hurt to drum up excitement. Hell it was the 15 year anniversary the other day of my favorite baseball fight: A-Rod vs Tek

 

The 300s 2018 Fantasy Football All Cock Tease Team

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Welcome, welcome to our awards. Before we begin I’m going to briefly kick it to our team on tonight’s red carpet…

Thank Joey! Here we see Founder Red wearing a Lakers jersey with camo cargo shorts. I’m really digging his ironic choice that is clearly a protest to our recent cooperation with North Korea. Back to the studio…

Thanks guys! Now before we proceed I should probably explain what these awards actually are about since nobody fucking knows.

We have all picked a bust or 12 throughout our fantasy football seasons, however most are of either the “reach” or “hard on” variety. A “reach”, as is well known, is a player you pick a bit too high, possibly motivated by the fear of someone else picking him. A “hard on” pick, for lack of a more enlightened term, would refer to players that we just personally really like without a ton evidence as to why and that simply don’t work out.

These awards, however, celebrate the “cock teases” – players who are picked at a good time given their value, normally put up good numbers relative to that selection point, yet completely fuck us. They don’t buy us dinner first either, just bend us over the analogous  10, 12, or 16 team table and fuck us.

So without further ado, as composed by and contributed to by our talented staff, I give you The 300s 2018 All Cock Tease Team:

QB: Jimmy Garoppolo, San Francisco 49ers
Red: I was ready for Jimmy G to rise like a phoenix out of the ashes that was my 2017 fantasy season, but in his third game the most handsome ACL in the league exploded and I was stuck with Matt Stafford at QB the rest of the way.

 

RB1: Jordan Howard, Chicago Bears
Mattes: Now, a lot of people might give me crap for drafting Howard in the second round of a PPR draft. First, I’d like to respond by saying it’s only a half-point league, and, second, the guy also had two-straight 1,200-plus-yard seasons and nine touchdowns last year on a bad team. I – like many – expected the Bears to be much-improved this year (which they certainly are), and I also believed new head coach Matt Nagy when he said he’d finally get Howard more involved in the passing game. Then came along Tarik Cohen, and there were also five games this year in which Howard averaged under 2.6 yards a carry. In fact, Cohen actually ended up finishing over FOURTY spots ahead of Howard in the overall rankings this year. Picked the wrong guy, I guess, huh?

 


RB2: Le’veon Bell, Pittsburgh Steelers
GUEST CONTRIBUTION! Patty Blackouts: I mean what is there to say besides he’s a seflish fuck who passed up 850k a week to sit out and try and protect his body to try and get a long term deal. Took him 4th overall thinking he’d show up sometime around end of September or October and nope just sat out all season sending cryptic tweets so you’d think he was going to report and next ya know he’s playing pickup basketball games at the local Y. I hope no one pays him what he wants and he regrets passing up the 14.5 mill he would have been paid this season by signing the franchise tag. But yes I’m bitter because  I used my first overall pick on him in fantasy got the same amount of points out of him as he did paychecks this season….0!

I hope he gets hurt in the next preseason.

Douchebag.

WR1: Quincy Enunwa, Goddam Jets
Red: No one, and I mean no one in my fantasy league watches more Jets games than me as the Mrs. is a huge fan. So watching a team that bad I was determined to derive some value out of it, which is exactly what Quincy Enunwa was going to do for me. Enunwa was going to be the steal of the draft as he put up 15, 12 and 10 points in 3 of the first 4 games, but then his season was derailed by various injuries. He cracked 6 points just once after September…

 

WR2: Golden Tate, Detroit Lions/Philadelphia Eagles
Joey B: Tate started the season as Matthew Stafford’s #1 option in what is normally a high flying Detroit offense. To that end, he kicked off the season with games of  17, 15, 10 and TWENTY FUCKING NINE. After that he completely shit the bed, probably became an asshole in the locker room because he realized his name is fucking Golden, and then got traded to Philly where he had one game of 20, coincidentally the only other time he’s seen the end zone since September, and seemingly is hated by all 12 of Philly’s playoff-ready QBs.

 

TE: Gronk
Joey B: I always pick Gronk wayyyy too high because he plays a position where all of 4-5 guys give you tremendous amounts of points and even among those guys he usually stands out. But this year, as the world knows, was different. He’s just broken and I’m just sad.

 

Flex1: Jarvis Landry, Cleveland Browns
Mattes: Landry wasn’t without a few big games of his own this year. Also like Cousins, Landry was a guy whom I expected to make a huge splash with a new team this season, but instead was super inconsistent. Yes, he had to deal with learning how to play with two different QBs this year, but remember that Baker Mayfield has been playing since Week 3. In the 13 games he’s played with Mayfield, Landry has put up single-digit totals in seven of them. For a guy who averaged 99 catches per season before this year, his mark of 72 through 16 games this year is incredibly disappointing.

 

Flex2: Chris Hogan, New England Patriots
Big Z: With Brandin Cooks in LA and Julian Edelman sidelined for the first four games of the season, I was certain Chris Hogan was a steal in the fifth round. He would be one of Tom Brady’s top targets the first month of the season, and hopefully stay in the mix even after Edelman returned.

Hogan scored two touchdowns in Week 2, but he wouldn’t find the end zone again for three months. By that time I had already dropped him and moved on. Just another cautionary tale of putting too much stock in to a Patriots WR/RB for fantasy football purposes.

 

D/ST: San Diego Los Angeles Chargers
Joey B: With Joey Bosa and company up front and some decent pieces in the secondary, I thought the “pressure creates turnovers” rule would get me some points on D. Instead Bosa got hurt and the Chargers are last in return yards allowed.

 

Kicker: Dan Bailey, Minnesota Vikings
Big Z: Drafting and picking up kickers in fantasy football is a bit of a crap shoot. You just try to pick up a guy who kicks for a team with a good, but not great, offense. If he plays in warm weather or a dome, even better. That’s why I love NFC South kickers and why I will never draft the Bills kicker.

Dan Bailey had a rough 2017 and got released by Dallas. But he was at one time the most accurate kicker in NFL history. When he got picked up by Minnesota, I thought he would be a good guy to take a flier on. Accurate kicker on a good, not great, team that plays its home games in a dome.

Bailey is 20/27 on field goals for the Vikes this year and his 2018 may be worse than his 2017. Yikes. God help the Vikings special teams coach

 

*BONUS: Mid-Season Pick Up Fist Fucker of the Year*

WR: Marquez Valdes-Scantling, Green Bay Packers

Red: MVS was one of the few guys I was first to the punch on in my league and he looked like a STUD. 6’4″ with 4.3 speed and Aaron Rodgers throwing him the ball? Yes please. After a quiet start to the season MVS blew onto the scene with a 4 week stretch of 13+ points. He would post 6+ points just once the rest of the way…

 

 

 

Top 5 Moments from Week 12 in the NFL

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In case you were too hungover to watch anything else after the Patriots game yesterday, we’ve compiled the Top 5 moments from Week 12. A lot of wild plays were made yesterday so here’s what you need to see.

Christian McCaffrey had a downright Madden kind of game on Sunday rushing for 125 yards and a TD while also catching 11 balls for 112 yards and another TD through the air. Incredible performance from the Stanford product as he continues to prove he’s more than just the “receiving” back many projected him to be in the NFL.

Speaking of Madden type plays, this one from Browns tight end David Njoku for a TD is the exact type of play in Madden that would have made me fire my controller off the wall in college. Glitch city.

We’ve got Seattle runningback Chris Carson doing Matrix type flips on the field. Usually leaving your feet NEVER ends well, somehow Carson ends up right back where he started unharmed and ready to run.

If we’re being honest, that flip and that landing really reminded me more of this than anything else:

Baker Mayfield continues to live dangerously going off for four TDs in a win over the Bengals. After the game he took ex-head coach Hue Jackson, who is now an assistant with division rival Cincinnati, behind the shed after the game.

Ben Roethlisberger just gift wrapped the No. 2 seed for the Patriots with one of the worst interceptions you will ever see. In a game where he threw for 462 yards and a TD, Big Ben completely submarined the entire day with one awful throw.

Are Tom Brady and Gronk Going to Make Orphans of Jalen Ramsey’s Children?

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It’s one thing to call Josh Allen and Joe Flacco trash because they are in fact not good at football. However, when Jalen Ramsey starts chirping Rob Gronkowski it kind of rings false.

“I don’t think Gronk’s good,” Ramsey told ESPN.com’s Mina Kimes in a story that was published late last month. He then clarified: “Let me say — I don’t think Gronk is as great as people think he is.”

If I know the Patriots, and I like to think I do, these guys love nothing more than stomping on the heads of their loudest and cockiest enemies before dancing on their graves. With that being said, are Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski going to make a orphans out of Jalen Ramsey’s children?

Not that good? Lets see…Gronk was voted the No. 1 tight end in the league by his peers last year, he is a 4x All-Pro, and thats before we even get into his career stats.

  • 4th all time in Touchdowns for a TE
  • 11th all time in Receiving Yards for a TE
  • 21st all time in Receptions for a TE
  • 1st all time in Receiving Yards per Game for a TE

All of that despite being *92nd* in Career Games Played for a TE. Gronk is one of the all-time greats and a hands down first ballot Hall of Famer at the ripe old age of 29.

Yet Jalen Ramsey has decided to put a target on his back by chirping Gronk for some reason.

Do you guys remember Anthony Smith?

In the run-up to a December clash between the two AFC powerhouses in 2007, second year Steelers safety Anthony Smith guaranteed a win against the (undefeated) Patriots. When asked about it, he doubled down

Brady and the Patriots not only heard Smith, they went directly at him when the game began. Randy Moss caught a 63-yard touchdown running past Smith. And the Patriots used a double pass play to exploit Smith for a second score

Brady himself found Smith after one score, making sure his thoughts were understood.

Tom Brady and Randy Moss took that to heart and ruthlessly attacked Smith, roasted him, and just went out of their way to embarrass the guy on national TV for having the gall to question the Patriots.

Hell even Belichick got into the mud to put the finishing touches on the battered, bruised and beaten safety.

“We’ve played against a lot better safeties than him, I’ll tell you,” said the Patriots coach. By the game’s end, the stats told a stark picture. The Patriots passed 46 times for 399 yards and four touchdowns, barely bothering with a run game.

Now obviously Jalen Ramsey is no Anthony Smith, rather he was All-Pro last season, but you keep knocking on the devils door and sooner or later someone’s going to answer.