Applebees Continues Its Quest to Kill You and Everyone You Know With $1 Jolly Rancher Vodka Drinks

Pardon me for taking the lord’s name in vain, but Jesus Christ, Applebees. This could be the No. 1 reason twenty somethings across America black out on Christmas break. Are you trying to get diabetes? Because this is how you get diabetes.  Just guzzling sweet, delicious sour apple jolly ranchers infused with a liter of vodka. Come to think of it, this is just the properly branded version of one of my go to drinks in college: the Midouri Sour.

If you’ve never had a Midouri Sour, it’s essentially just drinking Puckers straight from the bottle. It tastes like a sweet, sweet mixer, but it’s riddled with vodka so it gets the job done. Pound down a few of these bad boys and you could dance the night away. Might even have to take your shoes off on the walk home.

So for anyone who wants to black out like an adult(ish) yet have nostalgia endorphins firing in their brain with the taste of Jolly Ranchers on your palate, then this is the cocktail for you. Excellent work, Applebees.

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