Tag: Thor

The Snyder Cut is Finally Here and It Delivers

I originally intended to watch Zack Snyder’s definitive edition of Justice League in multiple viewings due to its ungodly 242 minute runtime. But I have to admit, once I got going it sucked me in and I ended up banging out the entire #SnyderCut in one sitting because it delivers big time.

The difference between the Joss Whedon theatrical release (which some people that are more clever than I have dubbed Josstice League) and the Snyder Cut is night and day. Granted it’s twice as long, but it’s broken up into six parts (not including the prologue and epilogue) which lend some credence to the rumors that HBO Max considered releasing it in weekly installments rather than all at once. Now if you’ve never seen the theatrical release you may just think this is a four hour masturbatory act from Snyder and I wouldn’t necessarily fault you for that assumption, but this just may replace Blade Runner’s Final Cut as the definitive example of a Director’s Cut.

So we all know by now that DC was trying to replicate the massive success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, which continues to run laps around DC with the also massive success of WandaVision on Disney+. However, this is 13 years in the making with the first Iron Man coming out all the way back in 2008 followed by The Incredible Hulk, Iron Man 2, Thor, Captain America THEN the first Avengers movie.

The biggest misstep DC made was releasing a very strong Man of Steel movie, an OK Batman vs Superman movie (that I often forget Wonder Woman is actually in), and then immediately jumping into Justice League with the addition of Aquaman, the Flash, and Cyborg. With only two of the six characters fully developed it was kind of a tall task to jump straight into team movie, introduce a new villain, and then bang it all out in 2 hours. Now I’m not saying you need to painstakingly recreate every single character arc because we all know Bruce Wayne’s parents were gunned down in front of him as a kid, and Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben was killed because of Spider Man’s carelessness. We don’t need to see that explained all over again, but Batman, Superman, and Spider Man are the three biggest superheroes in the entire history of the comic book genre. Not everyone knows the back story of Aquaman (all my knowledge is from the Vinny Chase movie in Entourage), the Flash (unless you’re a big CW fan), or Cyborg (best known from the cartoon Teen Titans, IMO).

In the original theatrical version all three of those characters get put on the back burner so you never really have time to care about them. With the opportunity presented by a four hour movie, Snyder really dives into the back story of all three, particularly Cyborg, and gives you a reason to want to see these characters succeed. Plus it also does a much better job teasing the Aquaman and Flash standalone films.

It’s hard to get into too much detail as to why the Snyder Cut is so much better without spoiling a lot of what made the cut so enjoyable so I encourage you to watch it before Twitter spoils it. I can say that the quippy Joss Whedon dialogue got axed, the motivations of many characters have changed (for the better), Darkseid is actually, ya know, in this movie, and gone is the unsightly red sky plastering the final act in the original. The new cut is overall darker (both visually and thematically), more violent, more serious, and is even rated R (yay F bombs!). So it is much truer to Snyder’s original version. But to be fair even if he had finished the movie originally, Snyder would have never been allowed to release a four hour R-rated tentpole superhero flick. So while what he has accomplished here is huge, it’s important to keep in mind that he was able to move the goal posts a bit, a luxury which he or Whedon would not typically have had.

I cannot believe how different this movie is after Snyder allegedly filmed only four minutes of additional footage in his reshoots. Granted Snyder had a whole series of DC films planned for what was dubbed the Snyder Verse so there was a lot left on the cutting room floor that he was able to just pick back up. There are also tons of easter eggs and threads (like what actually happened to Robin) that are finally pulled on here just to tease viewers in the name of fan service. 

Now comes the inevitable question of “what if?” What if Joss Whedon never came on board and Snyder had been able to finish his original vision? Would the DCEU have never collapsed on itself and would we already be discussing Justice League 3, the Ben Affleck standalone Batman film, and a potential Jared Leto Joker spinoff? DC has to have known (hoped?) this would be the case and provide new life to an IP that was on ice after critical and commercial indifference. It is kind of a bummer because Snyder fully pulls back the curtain to show us what he was working on and we’re unlikely to ever see that vision realized. The new Knightmare dream scene that is towards the end of the movie (rather than earlier on in the original) is a perfect example of this. But hey, I never thought the internet would ever be able to bully a major studio into investing tens of millions of dollars into a reshot, recut version of a failed tentpole film, and here we are.

I really want to kick down the doors at DC right now and give them the Herb Brooks Miracle speech about great opportunity. That’s what you have here tonight, boys. I’m sick of hearing about what a great cinematic universe Marvel has.

Through their own failures DC has accidentally stumbled into an amazing opportunity here with the multiverse. They can finally stop trying to replicate the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It didn’t work, it happens. With the multiverse DC can simply make all of these random one off films and individual stories with different actors and just punt on a shared universe until they decide to bring everyone together again. It’s something DC has already test run on its various TV series with the Crisis on Infinite Earths event where they even brought back my dude Tom Welling for a brief Superman cameo. If rumors about the upcoming Flash standalone movie are to be believed then DC is really going to lean into that exact mindset with the multiverse as multiple Batmen are allegedly set to appear in the film.

Watching the Snyder Cut is a trippy experience because even the opening minutes are entirely different from the original version with previously unseen footage. I felt like I had Alzheimer’s because in my head I know I’ve seen Justice League multiple times but now it’s…different.

Admittedly, my viewing of the Snyder Cut may be seen through rose colored glasses after 3+ years of the internet lobbying for and then somehow actually getting a completely recut and reshot version of beloved IP. And it worked! Now do Game of Thrones.

What Are the Top 5 Movie Props of All Time?

I saw this tweet going around the other day posing an excellent question: What is the greatest movie prop of all time? Maybe you’re going with Marty Mcfly’s self lacing shoes or perhaps George Clooney’s Batsuit with the nipples? Here are hands down the Top 5 movie props of all time.

5. Beatrix Kiddo’s Hattori Hanzo sword

A Hattori Hanzo sword is like a modern day Valyrian Steel sword, which didn’t make the cut because GOT isn’t actually a movie. Goddamn was Kill Bill a great movie though. Watching both 1 and 2 are worth the double feature binge if you’ve never seen them. Basically a Hattori Hanzo is the rarest, sharpest, and best kind of sword ever produced. “If on your journey you should encounter God, God will be cut.”

4. Darth Vader’s Lightsaber

Truly one of the most badass characters in cinematic history. There are dozens of Star Wars characters and their lightsabers to pick from and I almost went with Mace Windu’s purple saber or the double sided Darth Maul version, but it’s hard to beat the original bad guy.

3. Happy Gilmore’s Putter

Maybe it’s the white trash in me, but I’ve always loved the Happy Gilmore hockey stick turned putter. It’s practical too as Adam Sandler had to actually sink putts with it. The putter may not be regulation, but I’m not exactly on the PGA tour so I think I can sneak the extra club in my bag. Nothing would please me more than sinking a birdie putt on 18 after shooting in the three figures on the first 17.

2. Mjolnir

Sure I have the plastic replica and a Mjolnir keychain, but give me the real deal! I don’t expect the hammer to come when called like a Golden Retriever, but this is THE conversation piece to stick up on your mantle. I would be shocked and disappointed if Chris Hemsworth didn’t steal this prop after production on Endgame wrapped.

  1. Vin Diesel’s 67 Pontiac GTO from XXX

Long before Samuel L. Jackson was even a twinkle in Nick Fury’s eye, this Vin Diesel store brand James Bond flick introduced us to the greatest movie prop of all time. XXX came out when I was 13 so obviously I was the exact target demo, but I also saw XXX 3: Return of Xander Cage in theaters with Papa Giorgio when I was 27 sooo…

Say what you want about this (delightful) movie, but if you don’t enjoy XXX you are someone who takes themselves entirely too seriously. Now lets get to the best part of the movie: the 1967 Pontiac GTO. This is just the sweetest ride these eyes have ever seen and I’m not even a car guy. This is the best (and most practical) movie prop of all time. For some reason I couldn’t find the scene where they unveil the GTO on YouTube in English so you’ll just have to make do with Spanish. De nada.

So whats your top movie prop of all time?

Good Guy Chris Hemsworth Gives Autograph to a Dude Chasing Him On a Motorbike While Filming “Extraction”

As soon as the Patriots trade down yet again tonight I am giving up on watching the draft and turning on Chris Hemsworth’s new Netflix movie that just dropped. Whether Hemsworth can sustain a career outside of the MCU remains to be seen, but this looks like a pretty sweet action flick. Oh and it seems like Thor is a good guy to boot!

“You know, I always thought that Matt Damon was like a Streisand, but…I think he’s rockin’ the shit in this one.”

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Phase Three

11 years. It’s been more than a decade since Tony Stark “built this in a cave with a box of scraps.” Avengers: Endgame is officially in theaters and I’ve been hiding from Twitter for the past week, minus a few ribbings at the expense of Mr. John Tavares and the Toronto Chokealeafs. Endgame is the culmination of everything in the MCU, a definitive end for many of the characters we’ve been watching since the days of George W.

As a final installment of the The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind, we wanted to touch base on the films of Phase Three that we haven’t covered yet, which also now apparently ends with Spider-Man: Far From Home. (Make up your mind, Kevin Feige!) So let’s get into it.

Dr. Strange

Giorgio: To be honest, Dr. Strange did nothing for me. I love Cumberbatch, but this film to me just seemed too much of a Christopher Nolan knockoff. The film is almost a literal combination of Batman Begins and Inception. One of these was good enough for me. 5/10

Red: This movie was a trip and one I did not expect to enjoy. I punted on it for so long that I actually ended up watching it for the first time on Netflix. I have to admit though I really enjoyed it. As Kyle mentions above it pretty much is like someone threw the scripts of Batman Begins and Inception together, but I loved both of those movies so it was right up my alley. Cumberbatch is excellent as the smarmy Dr. Strange and a really solid addition to the Avengers. 7/10

Guardians of the Galaxy 2

Giorgio: I liked it, but wasn’t nearly as good as the original. It was also really depressing. I’ll take as much Rocket as possible though. Bradley Cooper is an actor’s actor. 7/10

Red: I know Kyle is a bigger Guardians fan than I am, but I just could not get into GOTG2. The music as always was excellent (like the opening scene featuring Mr. Blue Sky), Rocket steals just about every scene he’s in, but I hated the “Ego is a planet” storyline and I’m a big Kurt Russell guy. But with all the aforementioned factors propping it up, this is still an entertaining flick. 7/10

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Giorgio: This movie was incredible. First Spider-Man I’ve liked since probably the original with MTV Best Kiss Winner Tobey Maguire. Tom Holland is a perfect Peter Parker, and the film does a great job of not taking itself too seriously. Shoutout to Michael Keaton as Vulture, essentially playing Birdman twice within the span of a few years. 8/10. Also, Aunt May 10 out of 10.

Red: Kyle described it in the best way possible; Tom Holland is a perfect Peter Parker. Michael Keaton was a kickass villain in a truly surprising twist and a legitimately frightening Vulture. Oh and Aunt May is a rocket. 9/10

Thor: Ragnarok

Giorgio: Possibly my favorite film of Phase Three. After two boring as hell solo films, Ragnarok takes a completely new approach to a stale franchise and gives it new life. It was hilarious, weird, and charming all at the same time. Tessa Thompson is a pleasure to watch on screen. Oh, and Jeff Goldblum. Horniest/smoothest man in Hollywood. 9.5/10

Red: This was one of the best comic book movies ever because it not only had top notch popcorn flick action, but it also was very self aware in how ridiculous it was (i.e. the opening scene/rock montage). Ragnarok also managed to work in Hulk perfectly without Marvel having to go out on a limb on ANOTHER Hulk standalone movie, despite how many people wanted a true Planet Hulk movie. I’ve always been partial to Thor despite it not being the strongest MCU trilogy (neither is Iron Man), but Thor 3 kicks all the asses and sets us up nicely for Infinity War, which starts minutes after Ragnarok ends. 9/10 

Black Panther

Giorgio: Had zero idea what to expect, but came out really enjoying it. Great cast, great story. Michael B. Jordan is one of the best actors currently working. Also made over a billion dollars, so no surprises how universally liked this movie is. 9/10

Red: Same as Kyle I had zero idea what to expect out of this movie. Chadwick Boseman was pretty badass in Civil War so I knew they had a shot, but Michael B. Jordan stole the goddamn show as, in my opinion, the best villain in the MCU. 8.5/10

Avengers: Infinity War

Giorgio: For a film that has about 50 main characters, they did a great job not making the plot stroke-inducing to follow. Thanos finally shows his ass after a decade of sending his minions to inevitably just do it himself. We get a great Peter Dinklage cameo, always a pleasure to see him. It was great to finally see the beginning of the end. 8/10

Red: Bravo! Bravo! One of the few movies I made sure to see opening weekend because you have about a day before Twitter eggs ruin the movie for you and about a week before Yahoo just straight up starts posting spoilers in the headlines. As Kyle said this movie did an incredible job balancing dozens and dozens of characters that you legitimately cared about as the world building of Kevin Feige really started to pay dividends. This movie could have been 4 hours long and I wouldn’t have moved an inch. 9/10

Ant-Man and the Wasp

Giorgio: Fuck this movie. 2/10

Red: Very forgettable. All I remember is the villain that can phase through walls, yet is slowly dying. Also, if we’re being  honest I’ve always disliked Evangeline Lilly for how she cucked Jack on LOST, but I admit thats not exactly fair. Paul Rudd is a treat to watch per usual and the movie introduces the Quantum Realm which I think we all expect to be one of the keys to Endgame. So decent movie, but very forgettable. 6/10

Giorgio: I….never saw this movie. Guilty as charged. I’m sure it was swell though, right? Nothing like shoehorning in a last minute character a month before the grand finale. At least I heard there’s an orange cat in it named Goose. Rating N/A

Red: Unlike Kyle, I paid 14 of my hard earned Schrute Bucks to go see this last weekend because I didn’t want to be completely lost when a Deus Ex Machina write in comes out of nowhere to save the day in Endgame. While I was less than excited going into this move (I just got a very Green Lantern vibe with the fighter pilot turned super hero with bad CGI), it wasn’t bad. Nothing great, nothing terrible. A de-aged Samuel L. Jackson (good CGI) carries the movie, but Jude Law is a great character/foil in Capt. Marvel. Some hamhanded naming conventions (Mar-Vel? Really?) and the lazy explanation for where Poochie, er I mean Captan Marvel, has been for the past 20 years leads to an OK, but highly skippable cinema experience. 6.5/10

Now I just need to make it to Sunday afternoon without someone spoiling Endgame for me. Do what I did kids, mute anything and everything related to Avengers on Twitter and stay off the news sites. We’re in the endgame now…

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Captain America: Civil War

Captain America: Civil War (2016) is one of my favorite Marvel movies and I think a lot of people agree with that sentiment. My worry going back and watching Cap 3 for the first time in years was that it would just be me remembering another OK movie through rose colored glasses because of the incredible airport scene. Fear not, despite yet another convoluted villain character, this movie still kicks ass all these years later. As it should, considering this movie really made up for the disappointing Avengers 2. They should have called this movie Avengers 2.5. It also has the distinction of giving Captain America hands down the best complete trilogy in all of the MCU. Iron Man 2 and 3 leave much to be desired. Thor 2 was not great, and Guardians 3 is TBD. Now lets get to it!

Oooooh I love cold opens.

It’s 1991 and Winter Solider is back. It seems like he’s being tortured by the Russians, but after a series of code words uttered wake him up you see he’s basically a brainwashed spy for the Russki’s. They send him out on a retrieval mission and he whacks someone driving a caddy and takes some blue goo from their trunk. Title card.

We cut to Scarlet Witch, Captain America, Black Widow, and Falcon scouting out a scene in Nigeria for a mission which quickly turns into an all out firefight

“Wanda, just like we practiced,” Cap says to Scarlet Witch, implying the training thats been taking place before this.

But, wait its not just some faceless mercs, it’s Crossbones who is already an established villain apparently, but someone I again had to look up to remember his story. For anyone thats forgot like me he played Brock Rumlow in Captain America 2 as a sleeper cell agent for HYDRA. Welp Crossbones tries to suicide bomb Cap, only to be temporarily stopped by Scarlet Witch, who in an effort to levitate him to safety accidentally blows up half a building.

And thats how you get the Sokovia Accords.

Holy christ they CGI’d Tony Stark’s de-aged face onto a teenager’s body.

Tony Stark gets confronted by a woman who blames Stark for her son’s death in….you guessed it, Sokovia.

And thats how you get the Sokovia Accords.

The Secretary of State drops in on Avengers HQ to lecture the team about all the collateral damage they’ve caused with literally no repercussions.

It raises an interesting question though, what gives the Avengers the right to operate with “unlimited power and no supervision,” as the Secretary puts it?

We are introduced to Helmut Zimo, who is another HYDRA agent on a mission. Zimo is torturing another old Russian general. When he asks how Zimo found him he directly references the gigantic Wiki Leaks dump Black Widow did at the end of Winter Soldier.

This is where the split between the team members of the Avengers begins. Tony Stark the rogue “genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist” immediately opts to surrender his rights and sign the Sokovia Accords. This basically gives the Avengers the United Nations for a boss, which military lifer Captain America is just unwilling to do. It’s quite the role reversal we see here and drives the wedge between the team when half of them sign and half of them don’t.

Sokovia Accords ceremony gets bombed to high hell and King T’Chaka, of one Wakanda, is killed in the blast, which we will learn later leads to the introduction of another hero.

But who would bomb the Sokovia Accords? Oh well the news immediately identifies the culprit as one Bucky Barnes. That took 5 minutes, but sure. We’re then introduced to the first incident with the Sokovia Accords exposing why it’s such a pain in the ass. By not signing the document, Captain America isn’t allowed to interfere so he and his crew are officially outlaws at this point.

Cap going to help his friend out turns into Cap aiding and abetting a wanted terrorist realll quick though. He nearly gets out of it unscathed too until a goddamn Black Panther drops out of the clouds to stop them. United Nations sanctioned War Machine joins the party and congratulates Cap for now being a criminal before all three are arrested. Oh and we learn that Black Panther is in fact King T’Chaka’s son, T’Challa.

“I’m not getting that shield back am I,” Cap asks.

“Technically it’s the government’s property,” Black Widow shoots back.

This movie has a lot of parallels to X-Men 3: The Last Stand. As bad as that movie was it’s how this storyline could very easily turn, with the world calling for the eradication of Mutants and the Mutants fighting back. Here we have Tony trying to stave off “something worse” than signing a document.

Hey look its Zimo who somehow works for the government and is the exact guy interrogating Bucky Barnes. K? Zimo uses an EMP to knock out all the power in the building so he can say the code words to turn Bucky back into the Russian spy he was back in 1991. But, before we get into that, maybe War Machine can explain what the hell happened with that EMP?

Bucky is in brainwashed mode yet again and nearly kills everyone before Cap is able to knock him out before he can escape. He snaps out of it and explains to Cap how he got his brain scrambled again and what these guys might be looking for exactly.

“Because I’m not the only Winter Soldier,” Bucky says as a flashback shows exactly what that Blue Goo was from the opening of the movie. A group of psychos Bucky refers to as the most elite death squad in Hydra history were also injected with that serum, but they all seem to be pretty unhinged.

Tony Stark is officially given an assignment to bring in the rogue Avengers, but without half their team, Hulk, and Thor to back them up it’s time to do a little recruiting.

We head to Queens to meet the best Peter Parker ever put on film, who Tony quickly takes a liking to and invites him to Germany for a little project. Cut to Hawkeye who’s come out of “retirement” to bust Scarlet Witch out of house arrest, which takes a little duel with Vision to do so. Black Widow recruits Black Panther and Cap hits up Agent Peggy’s niece (whom he also macks on) to get back his shield and Falcon’s  suit. And to round out the crew we got a starstruck Ant-Man meeting Cap and the rest of the rogue Avengers.

Paul Rudd should be in every one of these movies from here on out.

Tony and his crew of War Machine, Black Widow, Black Panther, Spider-Man, and Vision show up to shut that shit down. Let the Battle Royale begin.

Most of it’s all fun and games with some cheeky one liners, ya know except for Rhodes getting paralyzed. Other than that though, it’s all a pretty good time before Cap and Bucky escape and head to Russia to figure out WTF is going on. HYDRA winter soldier death squad, sleeper cell evil scientists?

The rest of Cap’s crew is on lockdown in the “max security underwater super pokey” as Tony describes it. He seems to be realizing this whole Sakovia Accords thing may have been a bad idea.

Tony learns of Zemo and with a tip from Falcon heads to Berlin, which don’t ya know is exactly where Bucky and Cap are headed. Zemo finds the old HYDRA lab in Berlin and locates the other winter soldiers saved on ice.

In a change of heart Tony realizes what Cap has been trying to do this whole time and joins forces with him.

Now this is where this movie gets weird. We finally see those other winter soldiers, but Zemo has already killed them all? So this whole thing was all a ploy to get the Avengers here? Bombing the UN, framing Bucky Barnes, killing innocent people for what?

“An empire toppled by its enemies can be rebuilt, but one that crumbles from within, thats dead forever,” Zemo says.

Zemo plays the security cam footage of Tony Stark’s parents not actually dying in a car crash, but getting straight up murdered by Bucky Barnes all those years ago. And it turns out Captain America knew the whole time.

Welp, there goes Tony’s renewed alliance with Cap and Buck. Blind with rage Tony will stop at nothing to kill Bucky now, even if it means going through Cap. After some serious hand to hand combat, it seems like Iron Man is in some deep shit, but with a blast from his goddamn chest piece Tony blows off Bucky’s metal arm.

Turns out Zemo’s family was killed in the shitshow that was Sokovia. Knowing he couldn’t kill the Avengers himself, he plotted to have them destroy each other. Black Panther apprehends Zemo before he can kill himself meanwhile Cap and Ton continue to beat the hell out of each other. Cap gets the upperhand and Tony drops a real heart wrenching quote that forces him to leave his shield.

Captain America goes full rogue and busts his half of the Avengers out of super max prison and leaves Tony with a promise, and a flip phone, that if he ever needs him he’ll be there.

Mid credits scene: Cap and Bucky are in Wakanda as Bucky decides being frozen once again is the best thing for everyone until they can figure out whats up. Oh and these guys have quite the technology don’t they?

Post credits scene:

This movie absolutely holds up and is one of the best of the entire MCU. It doesn’t really advance the overall plot of the Infinity Stones or the impending threat from Thanos, but this is a popcorn flick to beat all popcorn flicks. Captain America: Civil War is like when you finally get to open all your presents on Christmas Day and play with all your toys at once.

Final Rating: 9/10

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Avengers: Age of Ultron

The300s MCU

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I have a hard time coming to terms with this movie. Avengers: Age of Ultron is a strange crossroads for the MCU. The film has some great moments and sets up a ton of what is to come in Phase 3, but just tends to stumble over itself constantly with some laughable choices and poor pacing. Even though it is the 11th movie in the MCU, it is the first direct sequel to The Avengers which obviously comes with built-in expectations. Here’s a quick re-cap for those that need a refresher.

Avengers: Age of Ultron suffers from the same problem as most of the Phase 2 films. They all sort of feel like filler. Phase 1 was able to build excitement from the promise that we were about to see all our heroes on the big screen together for the first time. Flash-forward to Phase 2 and we have more of a “been there, done that” mentality. I’ve seen them assemble, so now what? Phase 2 promised us a new direction, the lead up to the Infinity Stone plot line. So what do our heroes do in the meantime? The answer is, not much.

Ultron in itself is a plot device designed to stall. You have a self-made threat, created by Tony that is the newest danger to the existence of mankind. James Spader does fine with the character, but Ultron’s presence alone is just a stop-gap until Thanos shows up. The Infinity Stone plot line is at least front and center, with several references to the stones encountered so far and Thor claiming this all isn’t happening by chance and that there must be someone manipulating them from afar. Very astute observation, Thor.

The film does give us some new characters, most notably Vision and Scarlett Witch. Vision, who is essentially a demi-god, is a solid addition to the team. The character is played by Paul Bettany, who is best known in the MCU as the voice of Jarvis. It is kind of crazy to think just how well thought out things are behind the scenes at Marvel. Kudos.

There’s a ton that bothers me in this movie though. Thor’s lightning pool scene. Quicksilver dodging bullets all movie long to just get a shot a thousand times and die. Hawkeye having a wife and kids just hanging out at home. All things designed to distract us that this plot isn’t really advancing.

It’s tough to follow up one of the most successful movies of all time in The Avengers. Director Joss Whedon famously exited Marvel Studios after this film because it stressed him out too much. Luckily at this point we were only a year away from Captain America: Civil War, which is essentially Avengers 2.5 and feels like a more natural place to take these characters after the events of the first Avengers movie. Overall, Ultron is very meh.

Final Rating: 5.0 out of 10

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Guardians of the Galaxy

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Very rarely does something just appear out of the ethos the way Guardians of the Galaxy did back in 2014. Before the Marvel Cinematic Universe really took off, I had major doubts that Iron Man could work as a film. At the time, it felt like we were reaching too far into the barrel and pulling out heroes that didn’t warrant their own movie. I mean, before knowing what we know now, the casting of Robert Downey Jr. and seeing the finished product, who the hell out there was clamoring for an Iron Man movie? I never in a million years thought we’d get beyond that surface level of superheroes, i.e. Superman, Batman, Spider-Man. Fast forward six years to the release of Guardians, which in my opinion was the exact moment comic book movies showed us what they could be if given the time and space to flourish.

Please take a look below if you’d like a bit of a refresher on the brilliance that is Guardians of the Galaxy.

So now that you’re caught up, where do I begin?

It is so rare for a virtually unheard of IP to come out of nowhere and become such a hit in pop culture. Guardians of the Galaxy did exactly that in the summer of 2014. I remember reading online years before it was released that Marvel was planning on bringing some of their lesser known heroes to the big screen. When Guardians was announced, I did some research into it because frankly I had no clue what it was even about. I remember seeing things that said the ensemble featured a talking Raccoon, a gigantic tree that only said it’s own name, and a human by the name of Peter Quill. Needless to say, I thought this movie was going to tank. “There’s absolutely no way this thing could work!” “They are getting so unbelievably desperate.” For those keeping score at home, I was completely wrong once again.

Guardians of the Galaxy felt immediate. It’s the first movie set in space since probably Star Wars where the world felt lived in and already established. The roles were brilliantly cast. I never suspected Chris Pratt could be a leading man and yet here we are several years removed and he’s one of the biggest stars in Hollywood. Rocket Raccoon and Groot went from “sounds horrible on paper” to being plastered on every toy, action figure, and coffee mug inside your local Target. And how about that damn soundtrack? James Gunn took some of the best songs from the 70s and 80s and made them the backbone of a film set in a far off galaxy and they somehow all work perfectly. The soundtrack naturally shot to #1 on the Billboard charts for several weeks.

Guardians of the Galaxy was the first movie to come along in the MCU that made me completely forget about the MCU. I suddenly stopped caring about what The Avengers were up to and wanted to see the continuing adventures of Star-lord and Company. Don’t get me wrong, I love The Avengers, but Guardians showcased exactly what comic book movies could do if they tried something different. To this day it sits in my top three in the MCU.

Final rating: 9.5 out of 10

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Captain America: The Winter Soldier

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Captain America: The Winter Soldier was released on April 4th, 2014. Coming off two of what I consider giant letdown films in the MCU, I was praying to god that this movie wouldn’t stink. The Avengers was wildly successful in teaming up all our favorite heroes, only for Phase Two to split them back up into individual roles and bringing us pretty much back to square one. After whatever the hell Iron Man 3 and Thor: The Dark World were, I was starting to become a bit skeptical that this series was finally starting to lose steam. Boy oh boy was I wrong.

The film starts off with Steve Rogers out for a brisk morning run in Washington, D.C. He’s constantly lapping Sam Wilson (played by Anthony Mackie) who can’t match Cap’s speed. After a brief rest, Wilson tells Cap he works at the VA and that he’s a former soldier himself and asks Cap to stop by at some point, which Cap agrees to. Black Widow pulls up in a car to tell Cap he’s needed for a mission and they take off.

Somewhere overseas, Cap and Black Widow are in a military jet and discuss the mission at hand. They need to board a freighter that is operated by SHIELD that has been taken over by pirates. The freighter contains key information that is critical to SHIELD that Black Widow is tasked with recovering, unbeknownst to Captain himself. A large fight ensues with Cap rescuing the hostages and them barely escaping alive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZ7y3pEjNUI

A little pissed that he wasn’t told about the true nature of the mission, Rogers returns to D.C. to confront Nick Fury at SHIELD headquarters. He’s still a bit untrusting after the events of The Avengers and doesn’t fully believe SHIELD has the right intentions, regardless of what they claim. Fury explains to Rogers that times have changed and he better get with the program if he is to remain apart of SHIELD. In a show of good faith, Fury let’s Rogers see what SHIELD is currently working on: Project Insight, which is essentially three massive Hellicarriers that are tasked with eliminating threats before they even happen.

After Rogers takes off, Fury tries to review the data obtained by Black Widow and is denied access. Questioning why he was overridden, he begins to suspect that something is going on behind that scenes at SHIELD and he becomes a bit suspicious. He brings his suspicions to Secretary Pierce, the political figurehead of SHIELD played by Robert Redford. Pierce tells him theres nothing to worry about (sure Redford, whatever you say).

We’re then given what is one of the best scenes in Marvel cinematic history. Watch and enjoy.

Fury’s escape is then stopped by The Winter Soldier himself and he barely escapes just in the nick of time.

We cut to Rogers entering his apartment, only to find Fury sitting there listening to some old records. He is badly injured, and warns Rogers that he shouldn’t trust anyone and that SHIELD has been compromised. Fury gives Rogers the data that Black Widow obtained. Just then, Fury is shot through the walls of Roger’s apartment by The Winter Soldier.

At the hospital, Fury is pronounced dead in front of Cap, Black Widow, and Maria Hill. Black Widow asks Rogers why Fury was in his apartment and he doesn’t truthfully answer. Cap is then summoned to SHIELD headquarters to speak with Secretary Pierce. Taking Fury’s advice, he hides the flash drive of information in a vending machine in the hospital before departing. At his meeting at SHIELD, Pierce not so subtly accuses Cap of knowing more than he is letting on, and labels him an enemy of SHIELD. On Rogers way out of SHIELD headquarters, he’s ambushed in yet another amazing scene from this film and the MCU as a whole.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUpvwMLHdUE

After his escape, Rogers returns to the hospital to retrieve the flash drive only to find it missing, but luckily taken by Black Widow. They then travel to an Apple Store together (groan) to try and unlock a bit more information. They uncover a secret military installation in New Jersey where Captain was originally trained. Underneath the base, they discover a hidden room that is filled with antique computers and technology which is revealed to be recreation of Zola from Cap 1’s brain? (Yeah, this is the one thing in this movie that has me a little confused) Computer Zola pretty much tells Cap and Black Widow that HYDRA has been infiltrating SHIELD for the last half a century. Just then a missile strikes the base, destroying it and nearly killing Cap and Black Widow.

After another run in with the The Winter Soldier, it is revealed that he is in fact Bucky Barnes, Steve’s long thought dead best friend. They are captured by HYDRA agents and taken to Pierce. In transit, Maria Hill is discovered to be posing as one of the HYRDA agents and busts them out of captivity. She brings them to a secret base, where we see Nick Fury, alive and well. He faked his own death because he wasn’t sure who he could trust (Sure, whatever, i’ll let it slide).

The World Security Council shows up to SHIELD headquarters for a demonstration of Project Insight. Captain America gets on the loudspeaker and announces to all SHIELD employees that HYDRA has taken over, with Pierce being their leader. Gunfire ensues as the employees quickly take sides. The Hellicarriers are launched and Cap and Black Widow attempt to take back control, with The Winter Soldier waiting for them on board. Cap is convinced Bucky remembers who he is, with Bucky trying his hardest to not let on that he’s right. The Hellicarriers are destroyed and as they are crashing, Bucky saves Cap and places him along the shoreline before he walks into the proverbial sunset.

SHIELD is disbanded after the dust settles. Fury burns his eye patch and heads to Europe to track down more HYDRA bases, Maria Hill takes a job with Stark Industries, and Cap and Wilson set out in search of Bucky.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier is the exact moment in the MCU for me that things went from good to great. It is living proof that the stand alone films still work, even after Iron Man 3 and Thor: The Dark World pretty much stunk up the place. The film almost felt like a Bourne movie, as opposed to just another cookie cutter entry of a Marvel film. To this day it remains one of my favorite films in the series.

Final verdict: 9 out of 10

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Iron Man 3

The300s MCU

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At this time I would like anyone who enjoys Iron Man 3 to vacate the premises because this film makes me physically ill. I’ve been dreading this movie in my re-watch from day one and lo and behold it’s just as terrible as I remember. Iron Man 3 was the first film to drop after The Avengers finally came to life on the big screen after years of teasing in the MCU. Yet, if Iron Man 3‘s job was to set the tone on what was to come in Phase Two, boy oh boy did it miss the mark. Let’s dive in.

Here’s a brief summary because I just can’t be bothered to relive this madness.

Iron Man 3 worried the hell out of me when I got out of the theatre. After all the hype surrounding The Avengers and us finally getting the amazing team up film we were all promised, we were back to individual movies and solo adventures for all our heroes. This was a brutal start. I honestly fully expected the MCU to fall apart after this movie, solely based on the reintroduction to stand alone films. My big problem with much of Phase Two was that it all feels like filler. We know at this point that Thanos is coming, and that the infinity stones will surely play a part in things to come. The problem is we were being set up for some complete waste of time films like Iron Man 3, Thor: The Dark World, and yes, even Avengers: Age of Ultron (I honestly couldn’t tell you a single thing that happens in Thor 2, so i’ll let Red tackle that next week).

Iron Man 3’s biggest flaw is that it does almost nothing to advance the plot of the MCU. It takes everything the first two Iron Man films did and turns it on it’s head. Remember how it was a big deal Tony had an arc reactor in his chest to keep the shrapnel in his body from entering his heart and killing him? Ah forget it, let’s just have surgery to remove it. Not necessary anymore. Wait, so why was that impossible the first two times around, but now it’s completely feasible? And don’t even get me started on The Mandarin.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdVOdW7kQwk

You take one of the most badass villains in the Iron Man universe and you turn him into an actor pretending to be terrorist just so we the audience can look and say “ooooh” “aaaah” “classic bait and switch!” It totally nullifies the tension in the beginning of the film where for a second I thought we were about to get something totally insane from an MCU where good villains are tough to come by. Finally, how about Pepper turning into the Human Torch for a grand total of five minutes just to bypass the fact that she fell to her death. Oh, and they fixed her off screen by the way. Back to normal Pepper!

Honestly, Phase Two is incredibly hit or miss for me. I just thank my lucky stars that Iron Man 3 is behind me. Could have derailed the whole thing. At this point in time I would like to officially declare it to be the worst movie of the MCU.

Final Rating: 2.0 out of 10

And not to leave on a completely downer of a note, I present to you the one scene I enjoy in the movie.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lid6feCW-DY

 

 

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Results Are in for Phase 1…

We’ve come to the end of Phase 1 in The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind and while we’ve had some incredibly lofty highs, we’ve also had some pretty terrible lows. If not for the raging success that was the first Avengers, I could have seen this plan very easily getting shuttered. Iron Man and Avengers led the way with a 9.0 average rating from the guys here at The 300s, but the second and third films in the MCU, The Incredible Hulk and Iron Man 2 were a low point with ratings of 5.0 and 3.0 respectively. This whole thing could have gone off the rails if not for a strong 4th quarter surge from Thor (7.0), Captain America: The First Avenger (8.0) and Avengers.

Don’t believe me? The Infinity Stones aren’t even so much as referenced until the post-credits scene in Thor, which was the FOURTH movie in the MCU. Seems to me like the big wigs at Marvel had their finger on the eject button just in case fans didn’t take to these second tier heroes.

Some of these movies are incredibly strong, but the collective score is brought down by the abysmal Iron Man 2 and we’re left with a 6.8 average rating for Phase 1 of the MCU.  Luckily for us, Marvel recognized they had a potential license to print money if they could just fine tune what worked well and what did not.

Up Next: Iron Man 3