Root Root Root for the Worcesters?

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The correct answer, of course, is “None of the above.”

I know it’s trendy for Minor League Baseball teams to adopt crazy names like Rumble Ponies, Rubber Ducks, and Jumbo Shrimp. Even the Yankees’ Triple-A affiliate in Scranton/Wilkes-Barre jumped on this bandwagon a few years ago and dumped the most famous pinstripes in the world to become the RailRiders. I respect the Pawtucket Red Sox for not giving into this trend.

At least Scranton/Wilkes-Barre may have had some Phillies or Pirates fans who didn’t want to go root for the Yankees. Worcester is just as deep in Red Sox Nation as Pawtucket is, though. Why give up that Red Sox brand name? [Unless the big league team has asked you to.] Of course they can’t be called the Paw Sox after they leave Pawtucket, but Woo Sox or Wor Sox would be better than the nicknames some marketing firm came up with. And you could still wear all sorts of crazy uniforms and come up with one-day team names like the Omaha Potholes.

Speaking of which, I feel bad that Larry Lucchino probably actually had to pay money to some marketing firm to come up with names like the Worcester Worcesters. Whatever he paid them was too much. $25 million for three years of Matt Clement’s services was a better deal.

Celtics and Bucks Even the Series So Where Do We Stand Now?

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MATTES: So far, it’s been a tale of two teams through two contests for the Celtics. In Game 1 on Sunday, the boys were on fire and looked prime to roll the Greek Freak and the Bucks in quick fashion. Then, on Tuesday night, they couldn’t buy a bucket and lost by over 20 points.

Seriously, though, the team went from having every single starter finish with a positive +/- rating on Sunday to every single starter finish with a negative +/- rating in Game 2. Also, the team was able to somewhat contain Giannis the first time around (33% FG%, 22 PTS, 8 REB, 2 AST) before he came back with a vengeance on Tuesday (44% FG%, 29 PTS, 10 REB, 4 AST). Much of his resurgence in Game 2 also had to do with the fact he got to the line 18 times (!!), nailing 13 of those attempts. The whole “let’s crowd the paint and force Giannis to run us over” did not work out so well the second time around.

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Above all, though, the Celtics themselves just couldn’t buy a bucket in Game 2 either; after shooting a red-hot (and entirely unsustainable) 54% as a team this weekend, the then team put up a paltry 33% shooting effort on Tuesday night. That’s just not gonna get it done.

The series now stands at 1-1, with Game 3 scheduled to tip off in Boston on Friday night. Dom, how are you feeling after the debacle in Game 2? What are your thoughts with the series heading back to the Garden?

DOM: After a 1-1 split with Milwaukee to start the series, two things come to mind. First, I feel good with where we’re at. When you don’t have home-court advantage, you hope to steal a win on the road and claim home-court advantage for your own, which is exactly what the Celtics did. So as far as the big picture is concerned, it was mission accomplished in the first two games.

The other thing that comes to mind is, when looking back at where most of our heads were after Game 1, Celtics fans need to check their expectations a bit and not get too overconfident. Going up 2-0 on the road against Milwaukee would’ve been great, but it was highly unlikely. I saw a lot on social media acting like we were gonna roll this team, but the Bucks are just too good for that to happen. Plus, we can’t just forget about the way the Celtics struggled both on the road and with their consistency throughout the entire season. Yeah, we swept a depleted Pacers team that overachieved in the regular season, but the playoffs are different. Nobody expected the Pacers to actually upset the Celtics in a seven-game series (except maybe Jimmy Lips, but he’s from New York). Even though that series was a great stepping stone for this team, there’s still a long way to go. I honestly think this series is going seven games, and hopefully we get something more entertaining than blowouts the rest of the way.

MATTES: I completely agree with you about Celtics Nation getting a bit too confident after Game 1. (As Felger would say, all the “Green Teamers” were out in droves after that one.) Although, it is pretty amazing to see that the team already has three road wins in the postseason so far. They could only muster up ONE last year in their run to Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Finals. Even during the championship run with Pierce, Ray, and KG in 2008, the team could only get two wins on the road that entire postseason.

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Even three legends had a tough time winning on the road. It ain’t easy.

But, while it seems as though they actually are capable of winning away from Boston, as you said inconsistency is still rearing its ugly head. Gordon Hayward pulled a disappearing act in Game 2 after being one of the team’s keys to victory in Game 1, and he actually saw more time on the floor on Tuesday night. Same with Terry Rozier. While I’ll give him credit for getting to line five times in Game 2 and hitting all five attempts, his shooting percentage from the floor dropped by 20 points between the two contests so far. Horford also seemed like he didn’t want to be as involved as he was on Sunday.

And where the hell is Aron Baynes??!! In 18 minutes of action so far in the series, the dude has TWO freakin’ rebounds. On the flip side, 300s favorite Robert Williams had five rebounds in literally half that amount of time on Tuesday night alone. Maybe we should let the young fella try his hand at defending the Freak from here on out! No??

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Where you at, bro??!!

DOM: Time Lord!!! Love the kid, but that was all in garbage time, so I’m gonna go ahead and say leave him on the bench. It’s funny, one of my keys to last series was having Baynes own the paint, which he did a good job of, I thought. I’ll get into my keys for success later, but I didn’t expect him to be as much of a factor due to the Bucks being better at spreading the floor. But one rebound a game? Yikes!

Going into this series, I had two keys to victory for the Celtics, both of which happened to be defense-oriented. As it turned out, the Celtics did both things well in Game 1 and then both things poorly in Game 2. Those two things are:

1. Keep Giannis out of the paint. Easier said than done, I know. In Game 1, Giannis only scored eight points in the paint, half of what he averaged against the Celtics in the regular season. On top of that, he also missed 11 shots in there, three of which were blocked by Horford. I’m OK with the “Hack-a-Greek” mentality, so long as you get your money’s worth and don’t give up an and-one. In Game 1, Giannis only hit 5-of-10 from the stripe. That works for me. Game 2 started OK, but the second half went the Bucks way. As you said, Mattes, Giannis hit 13-of-18 from the stripe on Tuesday night. (Which is 72%, so really nothing special. I’ll take it.) But when you add 10 points in the paint, it adds up, even if it is down from his season average.

2. Limit Khris Middleton from behind the arc. Once he gets going, as we saw in Game 2, he can change the whole complexion of the game. In Game 1, he surprisingly didn’t look to takeover much, even though he shot the ball well from deep. He was 5-of-12 in the game overall on Sunday, but 3-of-4 from the behind the arc. I’ll settle for just four Middleton three-point attempts a game. Absolutely. But in Game 2, he found some confidence and started heaving up shots left and right, most of which went in. He caught fire in the first half, dropping 20 points on 7-of-12 shooting, including 5-of-7 from deep. He finished with 28 points and seven threes. And it wasn’t just Middleton who lit it up from deep either, as the Bucks as a team hit 43% of their three-point shots. Although Middleton’s the one you need to focus on, seven other players hit threes for the Bucks, too. Overall, it was just an ugly showing from the Celtics defensively.

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Do NOT leave this dude open!!!

I’m not sure if you caught this, Mattes, but after Game 1, the Bucks, led by Giannis and Coach Mike Budenholzer, claimed that they didn’t need to make any adjustments. They claimed that they just have to do the same things, but better. After losing by 22 points, how preposterous of a statement is that? Also, judging by the fact that they changed their starting lineup, got Middleton more involved, hit seven more threes, and got to the line more, what do you think of the obvious adjustments that they made?

MATTES: To me, it was obvious that the Bucks came out way more aggressively in Game 2, while the Celtics did not. It’s literally like the two teams pulled a Freaky Friday and switched identities between Games 1 and 2.

But you nailed it with Middleton. This is a guy whom I feel is one of the most underrated players in the game, and I’ve been saying this for a few years now. When he’s lighting it up, the Bucks are damn near impossible to stop. Whenever he gets the ball, he puts it through the hoop, whether it’s from deep (career 39% 3P%), the stripe (career 87% FT%), or pretty much anywhere else on the floor (career 45% FG%). The dude just gets it done, and I don’t understand why he’s not always as involved as he was on Tuesday night. If the Bucks just give him the damn ball, they’re going to be tough to beat.

Eric Bledsoe is someone who we’ve yet to even touch upon as well, and he’s another guy who doesn’t always get all the credit he deserves. After scoring just six points in Game 1, he stepped up with 21 on Tuesday night, helping to form a real three-headed monster with Giannis and Middleton. AND we still haven’t even seen Malcolm Brogdon yet!!! The 2017 NBA Rookie of the Year hasn’t played in the past six games due to injury, and if he returns this series things will get really, really tough.

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Bledsoe (left) and Brogdon (right) could still be two huge factors in this series, too.

So, while everybody was flying high after the first game of the series, it seems like things are far from over. As mentioned before, Game 3 is scheduled for tomorrow night at the Garden, and the Celts need to come out with the same intensity they displayed on Sunday. Otherwise, the young Bucks could take over this series in a flash.

Stay tuned to The 300s for all your Celtics playoff coverage on the chase for No. 18!

Introducing Chase Winovich (AKA Your Soon-to-Be New Favorite Patriot)

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For those who stuck with The 300s this past weekend, you were treated to the very best Patriots draft coverage around. (No, but seriously.) And in case you missed any of it, here’s my full breakdown of the team’s draft-weekend haul.

As I mentioned in that piece, one of the team’s third-round selections this year has already stolen my heart and undying allegiance. He is a 24-year-old, golden-haired BEAST who will soon be dominating opposing NFL offenses for years to come, while at the same time providing plenty of personality and cheeky shenanigans for a locker room now severely lacking in both due to the absence of one Robert James Gronkoswski.

His name is Chase Winovich. Please allow me to introduce you to the Patriots’ newest sensation.

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As a player, Winovich is going to provide quite the punch for a front seven in desperate need of some explosiveness. At 6’3″, 256 pounds with 4.59 speed, Winovich can serve as the perfect compliment to guys like Michael Bennett and the team’s group of other young pass-rushers. Winovich compiled 16.5 sacks and 35 tackles for a loss in three seasons at Michigan, serving as one the nation’s top edge defenders, and he can be pretty solid against the run, too. He’s also got a relentless motor, almost to his own detriment at times, and absolutely epitomizes the term “playing through the whistle.” The guy legitimately does not stop moving when he is out on the field.

Much like his playing style, his mouth is constantly going as well, and he often treats the masses to some very entertaining quips and musings whenever he is on camera. In fact (as I also mentioned in Sunday’s piece), NFL Network’s Good Morning Football dubbed him the draft’s greatest personality, and it’s easy to see why:

Then this morning, NESN’s Zach Cox was able to dig up some film of Winovich from his time with the Wolverines. Not only does it provide visual proof of just how ferocious he is as a defender, but he’s also mic’d up during each of the clips and…well, just take a look:

In case you couldn’t make out what he was saying in the first one, he’s basically screaming at the opposing O-lineman to “PLEASE BLOCK HIM,” a request which the poor gentleman was obviously not able to fulfill. (The fact that he also sounded like a rabid Tasmanian devil the entire time may have made it a bit difficult to make out.) In the second one, he then shares his thoughts on how to…ummm…play through the pain.

This guy is just the right kind of insane, and I cannot WAIT to see him in action.

OH, and he’s also just a really good dude all around. The story of how he started an effort which raised over $200,000 for a special charity dedicated to the research and treatment of severe brain cancer is incredible, and it’s definitely worth a read.

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While we still have to wait about three months before getting a taste of what he’ll look like in real-time NFL action, we’ll hopefully at least be treated to a little something during the team’s rookie minicamp next week (May 10-12).

Either way, I’m absolutely stoked to have this kid on board, and you should be, too. Welcome to Foxborough, Chase Winovich!

Panthers Runningback Christian McCaffrey is Going to Rush for 3,000 Yards This Year

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Curls for girls, baby!! It would seem like Christian took our description of him as a “receiving back” pretty personally. The guy looks like he wants to prove he can run through a literal brick wall like he’s Jerome Bettis or something. Borrowed a few workouts from the ole Mark Wahlberg movie Pain and Gain to do just that.

Now, is adding on oodles of muscles necessarily the best thing for an elusive back that like it or not is a receiving back (he caught 107 balls for 867 yards and 6 touchdowns last year)?

Only time will tell, but hey at least Christian is ready for bikini season.

 

Shoutout to My Guy Tom E. Curran for Having The 300s on Quick Slants

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Okay so maybe *technically* speaking I wasn’t on the show, but I’ll take the exposure however I can get it so shoutout to my guy Tom E. Curran. For anyone thats too lazy to watch the clip Tom says I should zero in on the middle guy there in Ryan Mallet for the most appropriate comparison to Jarrett Stidham and thats not exactly promising.

Although I have to admit I am shocked and offended and hurt that Tom didn’t name drop us on the air. Had me feeling like Walter White, aside from all the blue meth making and money laundering.

But seriously, shoutout to my guy Tom E. Curran.

I’m Not One for Hyperbole But I Think Michael Chavis Might Be Headed for the Hall of Fame

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Listen I’m not one for hyperbole, but I’m pretty sure after watching Red Sox rookie Michael Chavis for 9 games, he’s headed to the Hall of Fame. The dude has come in and immediately started to rake. While its common for rookies to sometimes get off to a fast start before the league puts together the book on you and starts pitching to your weaknesses; its less common for a rookie to immediately look like he *belongs*

Since getting called up Chavis has pretty much been an every day starter, especially after CROAKING a double in his first career at bat, in a clutch situation to boot. As a pinch hitter off the bench no less.

In 9 games Chavis is batting .286 with a .429 BP and an OPS of 1.071! He’s also got 3 homers and 8 RBI in that timespan so the kid can play.

In the interest of full disclosure I was not super optimistic about what Chavis was going to look like after returning from a PED suspension, but as I blogged about when the Sox called him up he’s actually been *better* at least in terms of OPS..

I don’t wanna jump the gun or anything, but do we have enough room in right field for his retired number?

The Sonic the Hedgehog Live Action Movie Trailer Just Dropped and It is…HAUNTING

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WHO IS RUNNING SEGA??

I texted Giorgio about it and he didn’t have a much warmer reaction: “Thats an IP killer. We may never get another Sonic game again.”

I was always a big SEGA guy growing up, more so than the original Playstation (released in 1994) or even Nintendo (1985). The SEGA Genesis came out in 1989 and my next favorite system N64 didn’t come out until 1996. I was even one of the 9 people that owned a SEGA CD system!

So there were some real solid years in there as a young kid with classics like Mortal Kombat 2, Altered Beast, Golden Axe, Streets of Rage, Vector Man. And that doesn’t include the downright impossible to beat games like Echo the Dolphin (fuck that game) and The Lion King.

All of those obviously pale in comparison to the GOAT SEGA game franchise of course; Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic, Sonic 2, Sonic 3 were all great games. Sonic & Knuckles was awesome because it was basically the first DLC expansion pack I’ve ever seen, introducing Knuckles and the power of flight into those old Sonic games. Sonic CD also had some AWESOME moments like the Metal Sonic boss that mimics all your moves, which was quite the mind fuck for a 7 year old.

So long story short I am a Sonic stan. I most recently relapsed into Sonic fandom with Sonic Mania for Nintendo Switch. SEGA has been run so incompetently they haven’t been able to make a successful game with their most popular IP since Sonic Adventures on Dreamcast.

That was 1998. It’s been 20 years guys. SEGA basically sunk their hardware company because of this and are now forced to lease out their IP as they’ve essentially transitioned into a software company that only develops games.

The story around Sonic Mania is actually one of my favorites because it shows just how bad it had gotten for SEGA. There was this one guy Christian Whitehead AKA Taxman who was porting Sonic games and tweaking the levels on his own and then releasing them online for people to play for free. Via his Wikipedia page:

In 2009, Whitehead produced a “proof-of-concept” video of Sonic CD running on an iPhone using his own custom engine, the “Retro Engine”…Whitehead proclaims that he spent “about a year or so” convincing Sega to let him work on the Sonic CD port. In 2009, a video regarding Sonic CD from Whitehead was taken down, leading Eurogamer to report that Whitehead possibly faced a cease and desist letter from Sega, which Whitehead claimed was false. The port was released for Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, iPhone and Android in 2011. His port was so successful that he was later commissioned to port Sonic the Hedgehog and Sonic the Hedgehog 2 to mobile devices…In 2017, Whitehead, in collaboration with Headcannon and PagodaWest Games, developed and released their own original title in the Sonic series, titled Sonic Mania.

Now I have to give SEGA some credit here because rather than sue his balls off they ended up just hiring the guy and letting him lead the production of the game that ultimately became Sonic Mania. The game itself is excellent too because just when you get comfortable and start to remember the level structure it completely changes and your thrown into something you’ve never seen, so its way more than a port. Its like playing Sonic on acid.

So for all my love of Sonic it breaks my heart to say this movie looks like the first and probably last Sonic movie we’ll ever see. When I first heard about the idea I said theres no way a live action Sonic movie could ever work, but then I saw the trailers for the live action Pokemon movie and it changed my mind completely. The problem is the CGI in the Pokemon movie is incredible whereas the CGI in the Sonic movie is garbage.

Sonic is legitimately haunting.

How did they get that out of this?

I will say Jim Carrey is probably one of the best choices to play a wacky video game villain (doesn’t mean it’ll be good), but I can’t have skinny Dr. Robotnik, can’t have it.

It looks terrible, but because nostalgia is the most powerful drug not named heroin, I probably will go out for a few beers and wind up seeing it out of morbid curiosity. If you’re a sick person like me, Sonic the Hedgehog comes out on November 8th.

The 300s Game of Thrones Meme of the Week Award: Episode 3

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Obvious Spoiler Alert: If you haven’t caught up on Season 8 of Thrones yet come back later.

Game of Thrones memes have always been around as they have for any pop culture sensation, but I feel like they have gone into overdrive for Season 8. Every week there seems to be 50 new and hilarious memes for each episode. So I figured it was only right to launch The 300s Game of Thrones Meme of the Week Award.

The winning meme for Episode 3 has to go to the one below because Arya was the hands down MVP of the Battle of Winterfell. Do. Your. Job.

Honorable Mentions

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Credit to @BuckeyeMike23

The 300s Breaks Down Game of Thrones S8E3 AKA The Battle of Winterfell

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Obvious Spoiler Alert: If you haven’t caught up on Season 8 of Thrones yet come back later.

In what was one of the most anticipated episodes in TV history, Game of Thrones finally unveiled the “Longest Consecutive Battle Sequence Ever Committed to Film” with S8E3 “The Long Night” AKA The Battle of Winterfell. Similar to Season 6’s “Battle of the Bastards,” this was a military operation through and through. (This episode was directed by Miguel Sapochnik, who also directed “Hardhome” and “Battle of the Bastards”)We got less of individual heroics and more of armies legitimately going to war with hordes of people and wights (temporarily at least) getting slaughtered. It was violent, it was dark, and it was hectic. I’ve heard some complaints about this episode and to be completely honest I need to rewatch it to fully digest everything that happened in the episode’s 82 minutes. Needless to say the internet is divided; the NY Times says the episode “exceeded expectations” while USA Today complained about the cinematography calling it “too dark.”

It was the longest episode in Thrones history and it was packed with action so my feelings below are subject to change after I’ve had a little more time to sit with it. With that being said, lets break down the biggest storylines from S8E3:

For the Night is Dark and Full of Terrors. Mainly Dark Though.

I’m not going to spend too much time on this because I understand it was done intentionally for affect, but one of the first things I said at the start of the episode was this is difficult to see. And that was while I was watching from an almost completely dark room. So I get the thinking, but thank christ for the dragons and Melisandre adding some light to this episode or I wouldn’t be sure what actually happened.

House Mormont Goes Up in Dust

Lyanna Mormont goes out like a G and takes down a wight giant while weighing all of 95 pounds. She really did prove that “every man from Bear Island fights with the strength of ten mainlanders.” RIP Lyanna.

I do have a bone to pick with the way we handled my man Jorah Mormont’s last moments though. We all knew Jorah was not long for this world. He is the archetype of the aging knight who will die to protect his queen. The musical montage of Jorah fighting off wights left me wanting more though. Maybe its because I just wasn’t ready to say goodbye to Jorah. Maybe its because I am dead inside after having just watched Avengers Endgame right before this episode, but it seemed to be lacking. Maybe a line or two of heartfelt dialogue would have tied things up a bit more for me. RIP to Jorah Mormont one of the realest to ever take the screen and a character we’ll all remember forever.

The Dragon Battle in the Clouds?

This was tough to follow, but for people complaining about it; thats the point. It was supposed to be disorienting, hard to see, and anxiety inducing. If the Night King is just flying around in plain sight then 2 dragons>1 dragon every day of the week, so it shouldn’t be a surprise he was trying to level the playing field with outside factors. With that being said it was definitely tough to follow and at the end of the scene I wasn’t entirely sure what had just transpired, but dragon on dragon action is always sweet. For having a dragon for about a week, the Night King knew how to fly that thing 100x better than the Dragon Queen though and thats a fact.

Fire Cannot Kill a Dragon (or the Night King)

As I predicted in my recap of Episode 2 last week, we saw that the fire of a dragon cannot kill a White Walker. In fact it can’t do shit to them, at least not to the Night King who took a flamethrowing Dracarys blast to the face and came out grinning. It was really quite jarring and one of the most underrated scenes of the episode, one that I think people are forgetting. Thats exactly why I am telling people to back and watch this episode a second time before deciding whether you loved or hated it.

Khaleesi used dragon fire. Its not very effective.

Valyrian Steel though?

 

The Night King Gets Got

As my fellow blogger Giorgio put it; “8 seasons for the Night King to make it to the Westeros equivalent of Nashua.” Dude didn’t even sniff the Iron Throne.

Credit to @BuckeyeMike23

Apologies to everyone who bought the Night King Iron Throne pop figures already.

Arya has now solidified her role as the MVP of Game of Thrones. She had a slow season as the show meandered a bit with her story arc in Bravos, but it paid off big time. She has become THE most lethal character in Thrones history. She legitimately snuck up on a gaggle of White Walkers and almost knifed the Night King before he could even turn around. In what looked like yet another suicide mission, turned into one of the most stunning moments in recent Thrones history when she dropped her dagger and stabbed the Night King in effortless fashion. Arya has been working on this move for years and in fact is a direct call back to her sparring session with Brienne of Tarth in Season 7.

Incredible scene. We’ll get to what this all means for the overarching story in a moment, but holy hell Arya has skyrocketed up the Thrones Power Rankings.

Jon Snow Nearly Meets His End Again

I have to give props to the Night King for not falling to pride like we’ve seen Jon Snow and the realms of men do time and time again. Pride is a sin of men so it made sense for him to make the cold, calculated decision to rise the dead yet again rather than try and take on the greatest warrior in the Seven Kingdoms in a sword fight dick measuring contest.

He’s seen first hand what Jon Snow can do with a (Valyrian) sword in his hand so why take the risk? It’s reminiscent of when Jaime Lannister challenged Robb Stark after he was taken prisoner following the Battle of the Whispering Wood. He challenges Robb to decide the war one on one. To his credit Robb says, “If we do your way Kingslayer, you’d win. We’re not doing it your way.” 

Jon also nearly gets lit up by the Ice Dragon and essentially decides to give himself up and go out in a blaze of blue firey glory.

For a second I thought we might see Jon Targaryen showing his immunity to fire like a true Targaryen, but the Mrs. pointed out something critical. Way back in Season 1 when Jon saves Lord Commander Mormont from the wight, he grabs the lantern and burns his hand before throwing it at the undead creature.

A direct contrast to when Khaleesi, a full blooded Targaryen, grabs the dragon eggs off the hot coals and is uninjured.

WTF Was Bran Doing?

I understand that he is a cripple in a wheelchair so theres not much he can really do in terms of fighting, but he was particularly useless in this episode. Bran spends 45 minutes basically just worging around Winterfell to get a bird’s eye view of the action, while offering nothing in terms of actual help to anyone. I feel like there is something more still lingering in terms of what Bran is there to offer the story, but I can’t put my finger on it. At least we can dispense with the moronic “Bran is the Night King” theories finally. Right?

Melisandre and Beric Dondarrion Fulfill Their Purpose for the Lord of Light

In what was one of the most intriguing storylines in show history, the red priestess fully redeemed herself with a comeback for the ages saving the day with some incredible fire spells. You have to believe that Melisandre went back to Essos specifically to train at the temple of the Lord of Light. Now that she has fulfilled her purpose and died “in this strange country” we’ll probably never get a clear answer. Melissandra coming out of left field to light up the Dothraki’s swords and then the spiked trenches was an all time Thrones moment though. Thats before we even mention the pep talk for the ages that she gave Arya though.

I won’t insult anyone’s intelligence by pointing out the source of Melisandre’s quote about death though. If you have to ask you don’t deserve to know. It really is crazy to look back on Melisandre’s storyline though; she’s been with Stannis, and of course when she first meant Arya back in Season 2 with the Brotherhood Without Banners.

Incredible.

Then we have Beric fulfilling his destiny and saving Arya’s life which obviously allows her to take out the Night King. It was some sick poetic justice though as Beric has been asked multiple times why the Lord of Light keeps bringing him back and he always answers, I don’t know. So for him to sacrifice himself to save Arya while on his 7th life was a valiant and fulfilling way for Beric to go.

Sam Gets Another Brother of the Nights Watch Killed in Edd

Jesus christ, Sam. Tarly better have another redeeming moment because he ignored everyone’s advice to stay off the battle field and when he couldn’t fight and need to be saved, which we all knew he would, Edd gets a knife in the face for saving Samwell yet again.

Khaleesi Gets Another Dragon Killed

Correction: The dragon is not dead, he can actually be seen in the preview for S8E4, which I missed in my post Avengers/post Thrones delirium. Carry on.

Khaleesi has to be the worst caretaker of Dragons to ever walk the Seven Kingdoms. And thats saying something considering her ancestors used to chain dragons up until they wasted away. What did she think was going to happen landing the dragon in a field of mindless, savage zombies? Well exactly what we all expected did happen and Khaleesi is down another dragon leaving her with only one. I think I get more emotional when a dragon or direwolf dies than any other human character does, but then again I am a total schill for animals.

RIP Theon

Theon goes out with honor and pays the iron price once and for all. Protecting Bran in the godswood was a suicide mission and everyone knew it. Kudos to Bran for having his first human moment in 2+ seasons and telling Theon the only thing he’s wanted to hear since he confided in Maester Luwin while wracked with guilt after taking Winterfell; “You’re a good person.” He killed dozens of wights to protect Bran while he worged around to essentially watch the action with a bird’s eye view and offer little in the way of actual help. After a lot of really cowardly moments over the past few seasons, Theon went out like a warrior trying to take down the Night King himself.

On the Lookout for the Fake Out

Maybe I’ve just become too used to the George RR Martin misdirection shock and awe storylines, but I refuse to believe this is the end of the story. I know the showrunners David Benioff and DB Weiss have veered off from Martin’s original source material a bit as they have passed the books, but he obviously has still given them the roadmap of how to get to his intended ending. So I just refuse to believe we’ve built up the Night King for 8 years only to have them go out just before the end of the story only to leave us with a battle for the crown. Maybe that was his goal the entire time? To truly have it all come back to a literal Game of Thrones? I don’t know, but I said it last week and I’ll say it again, if they kill the Night King and the remaining episodes are just a battle for the Iron Throne I will be a bit disappointed. Theres plenty of story left to wrap up still, but it seems like a missed opportunity not to mention a world of confusion to just let the White Walker storyline fade into dust like a Thanos snap. So I am on full alert on the lookout for the fake out. Whether it’s something as it relates to Bran, maybe the Children of the Forest make a comeback or maybe it’s not the last we’ve seen of the White Walkers. We’ll see next week, but its getting real now…theres only three Game of Thrones episodes left. Ever.

Valar Morghulis.

 

Debrief From The Battle of Winterfell – Game Of Thrones Spoilers Ahead

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55 nights. It took 55 nights, from what I understand in a row, to film the Battle Of Winterfell. A month and a half to film what I believe might be the greatest single episode of television in history. Sure, we’ve gone less than 12 hours since it aired so raw emotion is playing its part in my bias, but considering the immaculate way character arcs were both forwarded and ended, how what little was actually said was so spot on it permeated the risen-dead blood shed it was surrounded by, and how redemption was found in the most final and selfless of ways, I don’t think S8E3 of Game Of Thrones can be topped.

The only sounds we heard, from the side of Man, throughout most of those 82 minutes were the primal howls of terror, pain, and defiant rage that almost served as a second score to the already, and always, brilliant one laid down by the show, When characters did speak, or even experienced a one-sided interaction such as the look of shear panic on Jamie’s face when he saw Brienne being attacked. It was perfect.

When Sansa, resigned to the fact that she was going to die, told Tyrion “you were the best of them”, an allusion to her three abysmal marriages, the sad gut-punch of gallows humor that followed was almost as crippling as the grip of a white walker giant.

When Bran told Theon he is a “Good man”, you instant realized the only living son of Balon Greyjoy, the heir to the Iron Islands, had been set free. That after a lifetime of being cast aside and being considered an afterthough, that is when he wasn’t being brutally tortured and used as a pawn, he had done what was necessary to die a hero, to matter.

And lastly, although there many other fantastic interactions, when Lady Melisande evokes Arya’s first mentor and inspiration Syrio Forel, prompting House Stark’s resident assassin to tell Death “not today”, you saw the fire light ABLAZE inside A Girl.

The battle itself, somehow, was the most grueling of the show’s history, and I use the word grueling specifically. There had been more blood. There had been more dynamic fight scenes, whether due to wildfire or Bolton cavalry tactics. But in terms of pure, brute exhaustion, this one won. I’m not sure if white walkers or whites have breath, but if they do, the army of Man was fighting them close enough to smell it the entire time. For every one hardy northern solider, Unsullied, or Dothraki screamer, there were 10 white walkers with limitless energy and a thirst for, I don’t know about blood, but human souls. And they did not…stop…coming. And so as the battle continued, from when the dead breached the wall to when the Night King brought every one that had been vanquished back to their feet, it was not so much fear or anger on the faces of our favorite warriors, but fatigue. They were past facing down death, they just didn’t think the fight would ever stop, and to them, in the moment, that was worse.

Two long-time, divisive characters met their ends at the Battle Of Winterfell, as well as one recent fan favorite. Little Lyanna Mormont, Queen shit of Bear Island and ardent defender of her people and her ethics, went out on her fucking shield, killing the white walker giant as he held her is his death grip, having already shattered and pulverized her tiny frame. They say to be a true champion you have to defend your title. Lyanna Mormont did.

Jorah Mormont, the friend-zoned knight and former subversive to the Dragon Queen Daenerys, also met his demise, defending her from a sea of white walkers outside Winterfell. Each time they sliced and stabbed him, his will to defend her only got stronger, sort of knowing dying right there would be the only way to complete pay Khaleesi back.

And finally Theon. The guy was, if you dont mind me saying, a little prick for what he did to Robb and the rest of the Starks years ago. But as I mentioned, he went out “a good man”, standing guard for Bran until the very last moment, when he made an attempt on the Night King we all knew would fail.

I’d be remiss to not wrap up by touching on two things. I’ll go with the less positive first. Jon Snow, the epicenter of many a battle for the last eight years, sort of just flailed his way through this one. Just when you thought he was going to make a climactic move on the enemy or take one last shot at killing the Night King, he just started scurrying somewhere else.  I am guessing his “moment” was supposed to be facing down the ice dragon, but I don’t think it landed.

What did land was Arya. Fucking. Stark. Now a bona fide killer and expert tactician in assassination, she survived earlier thanks to Dondarrion and the Hound and then heeded Melisandre’s advice. I thought she was just going to pyscho and start killing every White Walker in sight, but she had other plans. As the Night King closed in on Bran, as did Arya on the Night King, literally from the top rope. As with seemingly everyone who has tried to Kill Arya Stark, he thought he had her and he didn’t, as she deftly switched hands with her dragon glass dagger a la the NBA’s best slashing guards, gutting the head of the undead and his entire army in one fell swoop.

We have three episodes left now and an entire war left to fight. The North/Khaleesi faction has a, let’s just say weakened army at best. They face the 20,000 men of the Golden Company, Euron Greyjoy’s ironborn, as well as the rest of the Lannister loyalists. They have (I think) two dragons left, a handful of soliders, and one Arya Stark. Can this war play out the same way as the one against the dead? If Arya, Jamie (I think he’s alive?), or someone else can get to Cersei, will her soldiers still want to fight. Are her’s the green eyes Melisandre told Arya about? I guess we’ll find out.

All men must die. Last night, all men served.