Tag: Patriots

Rapid Reaction to the Patriots 2019 Regular Season Schedule

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Even though the 2019 NFL regular-season schedule wasn’t supposed to be “officially” released until Wednesday night at 8 p.m., The Athletic was already able to get the skinny on the Pats’ upcoming slate of games earlier this morning.

And, of course, in today’s world of “I SAID IT FIRST” journalism, you know they wasted no time in leaking it to the masses:

Rapid reaction:

For starters, the beginning of the season should be an absolute cakewalk. Sure, the Steelers are a tough(ish) team to start off with. But losing Antonio Brown definitely doesn’t make them better than they were last year, and so far they haven’t really made waves with any noteworthy offseason moves. Plus, the game will be in Foxborough; Brady & Co. ain’t losing at home in a season-opener coming off a Super Bowl victory. So, that’s 1-0 so far.

Then there’s three straight against the dregs of the AFC East, immediately followed up by meetings with Washington, the Giants, and then the Jets. Honestly, a 7-0 start is entirely possible and should not come as a surprise to anyone. (*He said while knocking heavily on his desk.*)

However, after that, shit gets REAL.

Starting with a bout at home against Cleveland in Week 8 (yeah, if you haven’t heard, the Browns are going to be legit this season), the Pats are going to get hit with an absolutely brutal mid-season test. Even though they get a bye in Week 10, starting in Week 9 they have to square off against five-straight playoff squads from last season, with three of those contests being on the road. And to make matters worse, each of those squads look even better than they did last year (with the exception of Houston, who has done zilch to improve themselves so far this offseason). Seriously, Weeks 8-14 are going to a slogggg.

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Baker will make his Foxborough debut just a few days before Halloween this year. CANNOT wait for that one.

But then the season ends with three cupcakes, starting with Cincy in Week 15 and then finishing against Buffalo and Miami, respectively. (Also, I LOVE mid-season bye weeks. The Pats always seem to get them, and they’re usually a much-needed reprieve midway through the year. I was very happy to see that.)

So, in all, only about a third of the teams on this year’s schedule give me cause for concern, meaning that an 11- or 12-win season – at the absolute minimum – is a more than safe assumption to make.

Does that make me sound like a cocky, arrogant, spoiled Patriots toadie? Maybe. Do I understand why the rest of the nation hates us so? Absolutely. Can a lot still happen this offseason in terms of roster moves, or could a significant injury occur which changes my whole outlook? Potentially.

But am I still 100% percent confident in my prediction? WITHOUT…A…DOUBT. Mark the Pats down for another trip the playoffs and a run at title No. 7. You heard it here first.

D’Qwell Jackson Hilariously Asks Tom Brady to Help Him Get His F-ing Football Back

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“Here’s the fucked up part. I never got my ball back. The NFL said it was deflated. Then Bill Belichick and Bill Nye the Science Guy had a pissing contest over PSI levels…Roger Goodell probably has my fucking football on his damn mantle.”

Update: D’Qwell Jackson has responded and is now a friend of The 300s.

Bravo, D’Qwell, bravo. Heres a guy that became an unwilling footnote in the whole Deflategate saga. The NFL initially tried to make him the fall guy, but D’Qwell immediately denied having any part in snitching about allegedly deflated footballs. This video only confirms that in my mind as he comes off as a sneaky funny guy who just wants his fucking football back. As he has done to so many others, Roger Goodell swooped down and took something that wasn’t his. D’Qwell just wants a keepsake from a huge play he made in a huge game that his team otherwise got their doors blown off in. Let the man have that, Roger.

The Absolute Implosion of Aaron Rodgers and the Packers Just Reinforces How Rock Solid the Patriots Have Been

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Jesus, Aaron! Maybe just turn the other cheek? While he’s probably not wrong, he has absolutely zero to gain by sniping the “mostly irrelevant, bitter players.” It’s a lose lose situation because he just comes off looking like a dickhead. This all stems from the recent Bleacher Report article that absolutely smoked Rodgers and Mike McCarthy and the fault that each deserves for the Packers coming up short over the years.

It must be infuriating as a player because you really can’t win, but look no further than one Tom Brady for a playbook on how to handle “smear attacks” and media hit pieces. The most incendiary things he’s said in the past 5 years came from *leaked* emails such as him shitting on Peyton Manning’s longevity as well as his hatred of ill prepared pool cover companies.

Tom Brady also had the gall to politely tell WEEI to go fist themselves after someone called his daughter a pissant on the air. That was after ESPN dropped article after article on the crumbling Patriots dynasty including Seth Wickersham writing 20,000 word pieces on how bad the infighting and the drama had gotten within the Patriots organization. All they’ve done since was go out and win 2 out of 3 Super Bowls.

So my advice to Aaron Rodgers? Be more like Tom Brady.

Patriots Sign Austin Seferian-Jenkins Off the Scrap Heap. Mehhhhh.

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On Wednesday afternoon, ESPN first reported that the Pats would be signing the 26-year-old tight end to a one-year deal. Ho-freakin’-hum.

Now, toadies throughout Pats Nation will fall for the inevitable Belichick tire-pumping and be sure to let everyone know what a “steal” this is for the team. One article I read went so far as to say ASJ was “easily” the best tight end remaining on the market, and that he could “fill the void” created by Gronk’s retirement.

OK. Hold up. While he indeed might’ve been the best tight end left available on the market as of today, that’s really not all that impressive. Considering that Jermaine Gresham and a 38-year-old Antonio Gates (who, even if he comes back, will obviously not sign with anyone besides the Chargers) are the only other current free-agent tight ends worth a lick, big whoop. Also, he could not even sniff Gronk’s jock strap. So just stop. Please.

The media will also be sure to tell you how he’s a former first-round pick with freakish athleticism who has only been held back from reaching his full potential by unfortunate injuries.

Again, shades of grey there. Yes, I remember how much he was being talked about when he came out of Washington five years ago. I bought into the hype, too. And while the injuries started pretty much right away – he was only able to play in 15 games over his first two seasons in Tampa Bay – he did average over 16 yards per catch in 2015, which is a pretty solid mark for any player, let alone a tight end. But ever since, he has continued to regress and pile up more injuries.

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The kid was pretty solid during his college days. I’ll give him that.

UHHH, HEY, MATTES! HE HAD 50 CATCHES FOR THE JETS IN 2017! AND HE DID IT IN ONLY 13 GAMES. WHAT ABOUT THAT??!!

Again, biiiig whoop. He also averaged a measly 7.1 yards per catch that season and was only able to start 10 games. OH, and then last season in Jacksonville, he bumped his YPC up a whole yard and couldn’t even make it past October before ending up on the shelf…again. (By the way, he was also supposed to be a HUGE signing for the Jags last offseason, too. And…yeah.)

Look, I know I’m coming pretty hard at the guy here, and I’m not saying he’s entirely devoid of skill. He’s shown flashes, and maybe it really has been an unfortunate slate of injuries that has stunted his growth so far. Maybe playing with Tom Brady instead of guys like Josh McCown, a young Jameis Winston, Ryan Fitzpatrick, and Blake Bortles will help a bit, too. And with the dearth of talent at the position currently on the roster, I’m not upset at taking a flyer on him. Sure. Why not?

But for now, color me “slightly intrigued.” That’s it. This team still needs some serious help at tight end. ASJ is not the answer to replace Gronk. Sorry. He’s just not.

And Here We Have Lou Merloni Being The World’s Lamest Human/Wettest Blanket

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Boston.com – “You won the World Series, your banner’s going up, you’re getting rings. That’s it. End of story, end of story” exclaimed Merloni from a Red Sox standpoint. “No Patriots. Sorry, it’s stupid.”

So I’ll be honest I went looking for the link to this NOT DOING RESEARCH and was surprised to see how many people agreed with Lou Merloni, who has somehow parlayed way too long of a playing career into way too long of a broadcasting career. On the flip side agreeing with him were people like Scott Zolak and other raging jackasses from old guy Boston sports media sooooooo.

I personally like that the Sox did this since it is the same fan base. Plus the Pats win only happened a couple of months ago. To be honest I think Merloni’s point of view is just coming from the same barber shop that produces every “old man yells at cloud” opinion when it comes to America’s (former) game. “Baseball purists” I believe they’re called. People who hate fun basically.

But look, Framingham’s Favorite Son is entitled to his opinion, I suppose. My point is: who fucking cares? Is it really ruining opening day/your day that the Sox honored the Pats? Did they even televise it (nerd alert if you can answer this)? After I’d say pitch two everyone and anyone with a brain (and a couple beers) forgot it happened. Although I’d say there were a few kids at Fenway who someday will get to say they got to see BOTH of their teams who won the previous season honored, which is pretty cool.

Either way, for Lou Merloni to decide to die on the hill that the Pats should not be mentioned on an ugly ass April day is kind of preposterous. You got opening day, Marathon Monday in a week, a college admissions scandal. SO MUCH TO CHOOSE FROM LOU. Let a little extra frivolity go.

-Joey B.

 

BREAKING: Patriots Bringing Back Stephen Gostkowski on Two Year Deal

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A mere couple hours after rumors began swirling that the 49ers were allegedly interested in signing the 35-year-old – who has been on the market a tad longer this offseason than initially expected – the Patriots beat them to the punch and re-signed their longtime kicker to a two-year deal this afternoon:

I really am surprised that it took this long, and at some point last week I honestly started to believe that maybe Gostkowski would be playing elsewhere in 2019 after 13 seasons and three Super Bowl victories with the Patriots.

Look, I know I’ve been a bit critical of Gostkowski in the past, especially coming off of what was one of his more down seasons in recent memory. He’s also missed some pretty big kicks in his career – including the 2015 AFC Championship and in three straight Super Bowls – and he doesn’t always seem to have the ice needed in his veins in the biggest moments.

But, to be fair, the dude is still one of the league’s best, and I am really happy with the move. Even saying he’s coming off a “down” year is a bit unfair, as he still hit over 84 percent of his attempts last season and has hit at least 91 percent of them in four of his last six seasons. Especially given how horrendous the state of kicking is nowadays, you’d be hard-pressed to find more guys than you can count on one hand who can still match up with Gostkowski. He also did hit two pretty big kicks in this past Super Bowl, which ended up being won by a mere 10 points.

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Terms of the deal itself have still yet to be disclosed, but it’s obviously not going to be a huge hit in the pocket for the team. Regardless, in an offseason which saw a lot of familiar faces depart – players and coaches alike – this is a very welcomed signing.

Welcome back, No. 3.

In a Post Gronk World, Patriots Sign 285 Pound German Tight End Jakob Johnson

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Yahoo – The New England Patriots have a new tight end from Germany. The Patriots have added Jakob Johnson to their organization as part of the NFL’s International Pathway Program. According to Mark Daniels of the Providence Journal, “if Johnson doesn’t make the Patriots 53-man roster, he’ll be granted an extra 11th spot on the team’s practice squad, but not eligible to be promoted.”

Johnson played tight end for the Stuttgart Scorpions in Germany last season. He tallied 43 receptions for 474 yards and four touchdowns, in addition to 12 tackles for the Scorpions in 2018. He’s listed at 6-foot-5 and 285 pounds.

Johnson played college football at the University of Tennessee from 2014 to 2017. He showed some impressive versatility with the Volunteers, playing tight end, defensive line and offensive line. We know Patriots head coach Bill Belichick values players who can fill multiple roles/positions.

Herzlichen Glückwunsch, indeed.

In what I will from here on out refer to as a Post Gronk world, the Patriots are suddenly thin as a triscuit at tight end. Maybe they saw the success the Celtics have had importing Daniel Theis AKA The Daniel Wall from the Deutschland. The Patriots have had some success dipping into Germany before though, most notably when they signed Sebastian Vollmer completely out of nowhere and the guy went on to become a stud. Unrelated, but should be noted, Seabass is now dabbling as sports commentator and is also chiseled from marble.

Rough life for Sebastian these days.

So a closer look at Jakob Johnson, who is the prime hybrid prototype that Belichick loves so much, having played TE, DL, and OL at Tennessee. He is definitely not Gronk though. In fact he’s more like an extra lineman because he only caught 3 passes for 23 yards in 17 games over parts of 4 seasons at Tennessee. He also recorded 14 tackles in that same time. So not a lot of catches, but he did make the SEC Academic Honor Roll three times!

Last season he went over to Germany to play for his hometown Stuttgart Scorpions where he Balled. Out. Johnson had 43 receptions for 474 yards and four touchdowns so its not like the kid can’t catch, it seems like they just didn’t utilize him much as a receiver in college. Hey, Belichick turned a college wrestler into a 3x Super Bowl champ offensive lineman in Stephen Neal so I have faith Bill can make something of this kid too.

This has been your NFL Euro Offseason Report.

If the Red Sox Got Into Giant Headed Mascot Racing, Who Are Your Top Choices?

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GREAT question here, Joe. Now lets not just leave this to former Red Sox players though; thats too narrow. While I get what Joe is saying about Cheers, I am throwing that idea in the trash, respectfully of course. So any former Sox player or famous Bostonian is up for grabs in this poll. Here are some of the top Boston guys that I think would be A+ giant headed mascots

  • Trot Nixon

I cannot picture anything funnier than one of those abominations running around Fenway with the dirtiest gigantic hat ever made.

  • Kevin Youkilis

Youk would probably be the most easily recognizable giant headed mascot in the game with a 3 foot tall goatee.

  • Nomar Garciaparra

Once the sports book opens at the Wynn in Everett (lets go Mayor Walsh) I would HAMMER the moneyline on Nomah winning this race 5 nights a week.

  • Pedro Martinez

He would have a slight disadvantage though because a giant headed Pedro mascot would need to be taped to a poll as part of the costume.

  • Luis Tiant

El Tiante with a cigar the size of a pool noodle would be a dark horse candidate in every race.

  • Bill Burr

The angriest giant headed mascot you’ll ever see. Would never win shit because he is a comedian, not a track star, but Old Billy Red Balls would be a fan favorite for sure.

  • Ben Affleck/Matt Damon

They can’t have one without the other. Would be required they run the race as a three legged man.

  • Doug Flutie

The man is a damn legend. Forget the hail mary TD, the guy completed a drop kick in a live NFL game. My family literally has a framed picture of that shit in the basement. True story.

Who ya got? Tweet your best answers to me @The300sBoston so I can debate you on mascots instead of being productive in the cube.

Reassessing the Patriots Biggest Needs Three Weeks Into the Offseason

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In just three weeks since the offseason and new NFL league year began, the Patriots have already lost each of the following from last year’s squad:

  • Their starting left tackle (Trent Brown)
  • Their top defensive lineman (Trey Flowers)
  • Their starting tight end (Rob Gronkowski)
  • Their top kick returner (Cordarrelle Patterson)

OH, and they could potentially lose their kicker, too, as Stephen Gostkowski still remains a free agent.

Now, it might be a bit misleading to say they “lost” each of these players; many presumed that guys like Brown and Flowers would be too pricey for the Pats to keep, and the team was likely preparing to move on from them anyway. However, the news of Gronk’s retirement certainly wasn’t ideal, and we know the team already swung and missed on multiple free agents or guys on the trade block so far as well (e.g. Antonio Brown, Adam Humphries, Cole Beasley, etc.).

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MAN, this dude would’ve looked good rockin’ the Flying Elvis.

Look, I’ve been a die-hard Pats fan for almost two decades now, and Bill always finds a way to build a competitive roster, no matter what. But this offseason saw the team take some pretty big hits, and besides Julian Edelman and a solid running game, the team’s offense is pretty barren.

The thing is, after Gronk’s retirement and a few contract restructurings, the team now has about $23 million available in cap space after having just pennies a few weeks ago. (Which, like, WTF??!!! We couldn’t have figured all this out BEFORE free agency began, guys??!! SERIOUSLY??!!) At this point, I bet they’re saving up the dough for all the extra draft picks they’ll have this year or future re-signings, as there really isn’t anything noteworthy left on the market. (Maybe we could go after Michael Crabtree or Ndamukong Suh?? Ehhhh.)

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Love ya, bud, but you couldn’t have said something in February???

While it’s always a futile effort to try and predict anything Belichick will ultimately do, here is at least a quick ranking of the team’s biggest remaining needs this offseason:

1.  Tight End

OK. This one seems almost too easy. After losing arguably the greatest tight end to ever play the game, it should be pretty obvious that attempting to replace him would be at the top of the team’s priority list. Some, though, might say that trying to find a replacement for Gronk perhaps shouldn’t be the main focus; he’s a generational talent, and rarely has a team ever had someone so dominant and game-changing at the position. Rather than trying to replicate what they had with him, maybe they should focus on improving other areas of the offense, as they’ll never again find another Robert James Gronkowski.

Sure. I get that. But the team’s current options at the position are pretty bleak. At the moment, the team has Jacob Hollister, Stephen Anderson, Matt LaCosse, and something named Ryan Izzo (?) as its only tight ends on the roster. While Hollister has shown flashes of talent when given the chance, he can’t seem to shake the injury bug and has really only proven his worth in preseason action. Anderson is a decent piece with some potential; I liked some of what I saw from him during his time with the Texans. (No really, though. I think I’ve even started him in fantasy once or twice.) And apparently the team likes LaCosse, as they made a point to sign him as a free agent this offseason. (I literally know ZILCH about Izzo. Moving on…)

Again, while they’ll never find another Gronk, the position has always been a huge part of the team’s offense. Not only have over 20 percent of the team’s total targets gone to guys playing tight end over the past five seasons, but the running game has also relied upon some great blocking from the position, too. For as much as people think of Gronk as a receiver, he was also one the game’s elite blockers, regardless of position. The team also cut Dwayne Allen this offseason, who was another great guy to have up front. Especially with the investment the team has made in the future of its rushing attack, in addition to the lackluster receiving group, something else really needs to be added here this offseason.

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Iowa’s Noah Fant is an almost too perfect fit for the team and would be a steal at the end of the first round…if he makes it to that point. (OH, and look he even wears Gronk’s number. Hmmm…)

2.  Wide Receiver

WOW, MATTES! Way to go out on a limb. 

I know, I know. Even the most casual Patriots fan knows the team needs some serious help at receiver. But it still doesn’t change the fact it’s one of their top needs, SO BACK OFF.

Anyway, while Edelman is still playing at the top of his game, the only other somewhat reliable receiver the team has right now is Phillip Dorsett. Josh Gordon is still under contract, and he was terrific during his time on the field last season. But, while he could potentially play for the team in 2019, who the hell really knows what’s going to end up happening with that guy? The team also recently signed journeyman Bruce Ellington as well as a guy with some sneaky potential in Maurice Harris. But, in reality, Edelman and Dorsett are the team’s top receivers for 2019 so far. Yikes.

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Looks like Jules is going to have to be THE man again in 2019.

Fortunately, there is a lot of talent at wide receiver (and tight end) in this year’s draft, so the team could choose to pounce on someone in the early rounds. But, Belichick’s never really been too successful going that route, and I’d still like to see them bring in another veteran guy on a cheap flyer (again, Crabtree??) or via trade. Brady is in desperate need of some more weapons.

3.  Linebacker

Here is a position that is being overlooked by Patriots fans this offseason. I don’t think people realize how weak the team was at times over the middle of the defense in 2018. And, to be honest, if we didn’t have such a stellar secondary to clean up the mistakes of those in front of them, it could’ve been worse.

While some might think I get on Kyle Van Noy too much, I want everyone to know that I do realize his value as a pass-rusher/edge defender. He stepped up big time, especially in the playoffs, and he is a key piece on D. I’m not denying that. However, neither he nor Dont’a Hightower (who continues to look older and older with each passing snap) could cover a blind paraplegic stuck in molasses if their life depended on it. Not only did the team give up the ninth-most receiving yards to the running back position last season, but in the playoffs both of these guys also allowed almost SEVENTY PERCENT of the targets thrown their way to be completed. WOOF.

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Van Noy giveth, and Van Noy taketh away.

And there’s also the fact that Van Noy and Hightower are literally the only two linebackers who played significant snaps last season. Elandon Roberts has been all but forgotten. And while I am intrigued by second-year man Ja’Whuan Bentley – who showed a lot of promise before losing most of last season due to injury – we still need another guy, specifically one with some speed. Regardless of how you feel about anyone in the team’s current linebacking corps, there’s no doubt that the depth here is super thin.

(BOLD PREDICTION: Jamie Collins, an above-average coverage guy and former Belichick special project, ends up coming back to Foxborough on a cheap deal.)

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Round 2, anyone???

4.  Offensive Tackle

Again, here’s what seems like another pretty obvious choice, but I’m not highlighting the position solely due to the loss of Trent Brown. After all, the team did spend a first-round pick on a guy last year, Isaiah Wynn, whom is expected to take over and slide right into the left tackle spot this season. And they still have a steady-but-declining Marcus Cannon on the right side as well. Pretty much, the starters are set.

But behind that, there’s really not much. After losing swing tackle Cameron Fleming to Dallas in free agency before last season, the Pats then lost LaAdrian Waddle as a free agent to Buffalo this offseason. Waddle, while not a stud by any means, is a guy who played in 30 games (starting seven of them) for the team since 2016, filling in at both tackle spots whenever needed. (He wasn’t spectacular, but he was a solid, reliable guy who knew the system nonetheless.) So, in reality, the team is down two of its top four tackles from last season.

They did just go out and sign some guy named Cedrick Lang this week – who was drafted in 2016 and has yet to see an NFL snap – and there’s some who really believe in third-year man Cole Croston. Still, though, I’d like to see another solid tackle added within the first couple rounds this April, especially in a draft that is so deep at the position.

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I don’t know anything about this Lang guy. But I guess a 26-year-old, 6’7″, 300-pounder is never a bad thing to have.

To me, these are the areas in which the team could see the biggest issues in 2019 if not addressed right away. While a lot of people may also bring up positions like the defensive line or quarterback, I feel as though the team already has enough at both of these spots to get them by for now. (The draft is also LOADED at pass-rusher, so we can feel pretty safe assuming we’ll get at least one or two of ’em.)

What do you think, Pats Nation? Do you agree with my rankings? Is there another position I overlooked entirely? Be sure to let us know in the comments!