So Apparently the Alliance of American Football is Getting Good Reviews?

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Well, I did not see this coming.

Back in November, I presented my pretty frank thoughts regarding the upcoming, brand-new “professional” football league, the Alliance of American Football, which made its grand debut this past weekend. (Quick recap: I was NOT all that excited about it).

But all eight teams in the league saw their first round of action over the past few days, with varying degrees of success. And according to the numbers, people actually watched it:

Some reports even stated that close to three million viewers were tuned in at one point on Saturday night. A lot of things factor into those numbers, and it’s tough to pin down an exact total, but regardless: color me completely shocked.

ESPN’s Ben Cafardo responded by saying that the Houston/OKC game did peak with a rating of 3.2 from 11 p.m. to 11:15 p.m. that night, but the fact that they were lagging behind the AAF at any point on a Saturday night is still noteworthy.

Now, much of the initial interest could be due to simple curiosity. It’s new. It’s (slightly) different. And it was another way to get a football fix after the high from last week’s Super Bowl wore off. But, if we’re being honest, the XFL was the talk of the town when it first debuted in 2001 before flaming out in a flash, lasting just ONE season.

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So while there is some reason for optimism for the AAF – much more so than I thought there would be – let’s all still pump the brakes here. Everyone has also been pointing out the “high quality” of football that was featured, but they fail to mention the following:

  • All four road teams lost.
  • One team was shut out entirely, and another two could only muster up six points.

Sure, these teams could still be trying to jell and work out the kinks, and I will admit that I did not watch one blessed second of any of the games this weekend. So how can I really say anything, right? OK. That’s fair. But maybe, just maybe, the level of talent in the league actually runs the full spectrum – from really bad to really good – and we could be seeing the first signs of a big competitive imbalance issue. (Remember, the league is made up of a bunch of NFL castoffs or former college players who couldn’t make it at the pro level.)

Or, maybe I’m just speculating too much and trying to save face for what I said in November. Only time will tell, but even after all the positive reviews I’ve seen over the past couple of days, I’m still not ready to dive in.

Also, let’s not forget that the aforementioned XFL will be making its comeback in 2020. The AAF has only this season to solidify its place in the hearts of fans throughout America until they will be squaring off against entertainment legend Vince McMahon, who will be determined that the league does not see the same fate it saw during the first go-round. Either way, it will be just one more obstacle this league will need to overcome not so far down the line.

Still, in an effort to be as unbiased and objective as possible, I want to point out a few things I liked upon perusing through roundups of the league’s inaugural weekend. It’s going to take a lot more than the following to rope me in, but without further ado:

(The Game is Much Quicker): As much as I love the NFL, some games, especially those in prime time, can have you in for quite the long haul. With all the commercials and replays, it can actually drag at points. Only Major League Baseball comes with comparable length times, and both leagues have been trying to do everything in their power to speed things up over the past few years. I don’t have the exact numbers for each AAF game this weekend, but most of the games wrapped up in just under 2.5 hours. Much of this has to do with less advertisements, but eliminating kickoffs, extra points, and shortening the play clock to 35 seconds (from 40) were also big factors as well.

 

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You won’t be seeing any of this in the AAF.

(The “Sky Judge”): No, this is not some cool new Marvel character. It’s actually just the nickname for the ninth member of the officiating crew who sits up in the press box and has the ability to overrule bad calls made by their peers in real time. There is no stopping of the action, going to the hood, painstakingly analyzing some still shots, deliberating as a unit afterward, and THEN finally announcing a decision after a few painful minutes. Coaches do still receive two challenges, but the hope is that the sky judge will catch most of the bad calls and head off most disputes. (This is just another way to help speed up the game, too.)

(Everyone is Mic’d Up): Over the past few years, the NFL has started to provide fans with a few opportunities to listen into some of the action on the field. But in the AAF? Fans will be treated to that type of stuff all game long, even getting some on-the-spot insight into the mind of some officials:

As well as other cheeky shenanigans:

Pretty cool stuff there.

So, look, while the AAF had a great kick-off weekend and has I guess some potential, it’s still got quite a long way to go. While I’m not ready to go out and buy my Orlando Appolos jersey yet, I will be keeping a tepid interest in it for now, just in case.

What do you guys think? Have any of you watched it? We’d love to hear your thoughts on the AAF in the comments or on Facebook.

The New Jersey Devils Are Giving Away David Puddy Bobbleheads and They’re Amazing

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NBC Sports – The relationship between the New Jersey Devils and David Puddy goes back 24 years when Seinfeld aired the legendary “The Face Painter” episode, with Puddy supporting the team through the red, white and green art on his face.

On Feb. 19, you can take the face-painted Puddy home in bobblehead form when the Devils take on the Pittsburgh Penguins during the team’s ‘90s Night.

Gotta let them know you’re out there, it’s the playoffs. New Jersey and New York have the absolute best Seinfeld related giveaways, especially the Brooklyn Cyclones with their incredible swag each summer. (I’ll let Papa Giorgio tell his story of how he missed out on the legendary Keith Hernandez clock another time)

I am a diehard Seinfeld fan so this bobblehead speaks to me. Hell I once went all the way down to City Hall on my lunch break to meet the one and only Soup Nazi.

I’m not even a Devils fan, but I might have to expense an Amtrak down there on The 300s company card my debit card to pick this up.

Bravo, New Jersey. Bravo.You might have an absurdly complicated turnpike system as means of getting around your state, but goddamnit did you hit this out of the park.

PS – Some of the best Seinfeld theme nights and giveaways below:

 

Patriots 2018 Report Card (Part 1): Offense

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It’s been a week since the Pats won title No. 6, and the reality is finally starting to settle in that football season is now officially over.

We here at The 300s will obviously have you covered on any and all Patriots offseason news. Of course, we’ll also be sure to provide you with plenty of hot takes, bold predictions, and passionate tirades regarding our own feelings about how Bill & Co. should do things as well.

But before all that, let’s take one more look at this year’s championship squad, as I grade out each grouping based on their 2018 performance. Today, we’re going to stick to the offensive side of things, with my take on the defensive guys coming later in the week. There’s even some accolades that will be presented at the end, which will give some well-deserved shine (or shame) to a few players who really stood out this year, for better or worse.

Let’s hop into the grade book:

Quarterback: B+

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Giving Tom Brady anything less than an “A” grade is something I never thought would occur in my life, but I must be objective here. By most NFL standards, Brady still had a pretty good season; he finished in the top 10 in terms of both passing yards (4,355) and passing TDs (29). But by “Tom Brady” standards, he was a bit off. Both his TD rate and interception percentage were the worst they’ve been in about five years.

And while he did post five 300-plus-yard games, rarely were there times when I felt like Brady was THE reason the Pats were victorious in a particular contest. There were even a few games this year where he was just plain bad (i.e. at Detroit, at Tennessee, at Pittsburgh, and versus Buffalo at home). However, he was still MONEY when it really counted, though, especially at the end of the AFC Championship in Kansas City, and there’s still nobody else I’d rather have leading the way.

Running Backs: A-

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As we’ve seen throughout much of the NFL in recent years, the Pats use a multi-back system which does not allow for one guy to get all the love; however, what makes the Pats’ system so effective is the fact that each player within it has his own defined role, and each role was executed almost to perfection this season.

While he did miss four games due to injury, rookie Sony Michel was vital in helping the team finish fifth in the league in terms of total rushing yards on the year. He hit the 100-yard mark six times in the regular season and finished just 69 yards short of breaking the 1,000-yard threshold (and again, he did so even while missing almost a quarter of the season). He also threw in two more 100-yard games in the postseason and finished with 12 TDs overall, six of which were in the postseason. Perhaps even more impressive is that he was able to do so even though the defense knew exactly what was coming, as Michel carried the ball on almost 70 percent of the offensive snaps he played. Some of that has to do with exceptional play by the O-line (more on that in a minute), but the kid also got it done when called upon this year.

James White finished with 425 yards on the ground (on just 94 attempts) and finished with five rushing scores. But, as everyone knows, his value lies in the passing game, where he led the team in targets (123), receptions (87), and receiving TDs (7). He and Julian Edelman kept the passing game alive, even at its very lowest points this year. He was pretty invisible in the Super Bowl, but he was a huge chain-mover against both the Chargers and Chiefs in the team’s other two postseason games. He was the definition of “Mr. Reliable” this year.

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White really did so much for the team’s offense this year.

Rex Burkhead could barely stay on the field this season, and besides a solid playoff run, he was pretty lackluster otherwise. Even when he played, he averaged just 3.3 yards a carry on 57 totes. Still, Michel and White were one helluva 1-2 punch this season.

Wide Receivers/Tight Ends: C-

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To be entirely honest, Julian Edelman is the only reason why this grouping gets anything even close to an average grade, as it has been a very trying year for the team’s pass-catchers. While Edelman has been exactly as good as he was before the injury/suspension, those first four games without him this season were pretty rough.

Gronk has also been a major disappointment this season. Though he came alive during the two most important games of the year in the AFC Championship and Super Bowl, he averaged three catches and 50.5 yards in the 14 other games he played. He also only hauled in thee touchdowns. Those are some pitifully low numbers when comparing them to the rest of his career. While his blocking was still on point, basically serving as an extension of the offensive line at times this season, he was almost invisible in the passing game for much of the year.

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At least the big fella still laid the smackdown on opposing defenders whenever called upon to do so.

Then there was the whole Josh Gordon saga. (Gordon and his 18 yards per catch would have provided a nice little bump to the grade if, ya know, he was still here and all.) But besides that, all the team had was Chris Hogan, Phillip Dorsett, and Cordarrelle Patterson – and, truthfully, Patterson was actually used as a gadget running back much more so than a receiver as the year wore on.

As I said above, Edelman, White, and a solid ground game were the reasons why the Pats were able to move the chains so well this year; it was certainly not due to a prolific passing attack. In fact, Edelman and White alone accounted for 43 percent of the team’s total receptions on the year. The timing-based, short-passing scheme continues to defy logic and still somehow baffles NFL defenses, but the Pats still need to add some playmakers on offense, especially as Brady gets older. This should be the first area they focus on doing so.

Offensive Line: A++++++++++++++++++++

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So I might have been a bit too aggressive with all the pluses there, but the offensive line was truly exceptional this year. (And if you followed The 300s at all this year, you shouldn’t be surprised.) Not only did they allow Brady to be sacked just once in three postseason games, but they also allowed the third-lowest pressure rate overall this season. In total, he was sacked 22 times in the regular season. More important, though, is the fact that the line barely even allowed people to get in his face, which is extremely vital to both the success of the team’s timing-based offensive scheme and, more importantly, the health of its 41-year-old quarterback. And, as mentioned above, they also led the way for the league’s fifth-ranked rushing offense.

Just for even more perspective on how much of an advantage the Pats had up front over most of their competition throughout the league this season, check out this quote from CBS Sports’ Jared Dubin:

Rather, it was arguably the single best line in the league this season, ranking third in Adjusted Line Yards, first in Adjusted Sack Rate and third in pressure rate. All for the ridiculously low cost of just $14,539,489 against the cap. By way of comparison, consider the Chargers, who took on a cap hit of $14,968,750 this year for just left tackle Russell Okung, who gave up more sacks during the Chargers’ divisional round loss to the Patriots (one) than the Patriots have all postseason.

The main group of guys – left tackle Trent Brown, left guard Joe Thuney, center David Andrews, right guard Shaq Mason, and right tackle Marcus Cannon – also started together 94 percent of the time in 2018, showing incredible toughness and durability. The O-line was absolutely dominant this season, in every sense of the word – and that still might not be giving them enough credit.

  • (Offensive MVP): The Offensive Line – I’m usually averse to giving individual awards to an entire group of players, but it’d actually be more of  a travesty if I didn’t this year. Sure, you could argue that White or Edelman would be worthy candidates as well, but much of their success derives directly from the play of the big boys up front. The O-line was the team’s keystone this year, plain and simple.
  • (Biggest Surprise): James Develin – I gotta give some love to “Jimmy Neck Roll.” The 30-year-old fullback has long been an unsung hero in the Pats offense, paving the way for the team’s rushing attack and serving as an extra piece to protect Brady in the backfield. But this year he was called upon to be much more, setting career highs in carries (6), receptions (12), and TDs (4). Considering he averaged just five total touches per year in his previous five seasons with just one career score, Devs stepped up big for this team in 2018.

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  • (Biggest Disappointment): Chris Hogan – A lot of people might want to give this one to Gronk, but at least Gronk provided something of substance to the team’s offense even when he wasn’t catching the ball. For a guy who was expected to be the team’s leading man during Edelman’s suspension, Hogan hauled in just eight catches on 15 targets in those first four games; he then went on to compile a measly 27 catches over the next 12 games he played. He wasn’t completely useless, and he did average over 15 yards a catch. Perhaps he is simply nothing more than a No. 3 option with some deep-threat ability, which still has a lot of value in today’s NFL. However, that is all he’ll ever be, and nothing more.

Be sure to check back in later in the week for the rest of the grades, when we focus on the defense and special teams guys!

Scientists Tried to Find a Cure for Hangovers, People in the Study Less Than Helpful

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CNN – European researchers have bad news for the 76% of Americans who experience hangovers after a drinking session: Try as you may to change up the order of your alcoholic beverages, if you drink too much, you will still be hungover.

Determined to find a way to help people have a better day after a night out, the researchers recruited 90 brave souls in Germany between the ages of 19 and 40 to drink beer, wine or both. One group drank 2½ pints of beer, followed by four large glasses of wine. The second group drank the four glasses of wine first, then the 2½ pints of beer. A third group drank only beer or only wine. Everyone was kept under medical supervision overnight..The results, published Thursday in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, show no difference in the intensity of the hangover brought on by drinking wine first followed by beer or the other way around.

Man I really missed the boat on being a scientist. Accomplish absolutely nothing at work and then get published in CNN as a reward.  Long story short (and probably after a bunch of money was wasted) these scientists discovered that you can’t really prevent a hangover.

Whether you drink beer or wine, or a mixture, or even if you switch up the order it doesn’t really matter. You booze you lose. However the funniest part of this whole story was just how unhelpful the people in the study were.

“The researchers acknowledged limitations to their study. For example, they couldn’t assign a control group to drink beer or wine without alcohol, as the participants in an alcohol study were not interested in being in a non-alcoholic group“

Get drunk in the name of science? I will make that sacrifice. Try and mix in some O’Douls? Kick rocks, nerd. Come to think of it, thats probably why this study was inconclusive. When the scientists tried to test some placebos the alcoholics revolted.

Never mess with a man’s beer. Even for science.

Welp, Looks Like I’m Having Taco Bell for Dinner

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Forbes – Taco Bell today announced that delivery is now available nationwide, a day shy of the one-year anniversary since parent company Yum! Brands announced its partnership with Grubhub. That partnership included Yum’s $200 million investment in the delivery company to accelerate expansion of its network.

With today’s announcement, Taco Bell delivery via Grubhub is now available in 65% of its restaurants across the nation. 

I love me some Taco Bell. I don’t just like it, I love it. But the biggest problem with Taco Bell, at least in the Boston area, is that they are almost nonexistant. There’s the one in the Cambridgeside Galleria and then there’s one in Saugus. Other than that the only one I can even think of is in Quincy. Whichever one I choose becomes a goddamn expedition that James and the Giant Peach wouldn’t even attempt. So now I can have this delicious beef paste delivered hot to my door? Goodbye summer bod and any human interaction.

“There’s no doubt that the consumer wants delivery. There’s no doubt that they’re prepared to pay for delivery. There’s no doubt we see a higher check. There’s no doubt we see an incremental transaction,”

Having less locations in Boston than there are Infinity Stones will actually work to Taco Bell’s benefit if they can hire enough delivery drivers to not make this a complete cluster. More and more fast food restaurants in particular are getting into the delivery business, but there’s no way I’m paying a premium for McDonalds because I drive by like 3 of them on my way home from work. But Taco Bell? Hell yea I’ll pay $12 for a Crunch Wrap Supreme, a Doritos Locos taco, a Baja Blast, and a spicy chicken burrito.

With a smile on my face.

And you better believe I am picking up some fresh Taco Bell apparel at the flagship cantina when The 300s does Vegas next month. (I went there twice in one day that last time I was in Vegas)

Is Danny Amendola Destined to Rejoin the Patriots?

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I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to blog this because this scoop is coming from a twitter user that does not have the end all be all blue check mark, but you’re all smart people so take this with a grain of salt. According to our guy here, the Dolphins are already feeling some buyers remorse on the big contract they gave Danny Amendola just one year ago and may move on from him this offseason. I think we all can agree that Amendola was at his best, like most offensive players, with Tom Brady and was unlikely to match that level of production elsewhere, especially with a bum like Ryan Tannehill throwing him the ball. Amendola did have 59 receptions last year, but only 1 touchdown so its understandable for a team about to bring in a new coach and offensive coordinator (albeit former Patriots coaches) wanting to start fresh.

Couple that with this “Bold Prediction” from ESPN today saying they expect the Patriots to load up at the receiver position as they so famously did back in 2007.

Similar to 2007, when they traded for Randy Moss and Wes Welker, New England will bring in a few receivers following a season in which they were limited at the position. Whether that’s early in the draft, in free agency or via trade, the cupboard will be well-stocked.- Mike Reiss

I don’t know if I would categorize bringing back Amendola as loading up, but wouldn’t you love to have him as the 3rd or 4th receiver next year? Especially if and when Chris Hogan leaves in free agency? He was set to make $6 million in Miami this year so if he does get cut he obviously won’t be making close to that in New England, which could present a problem for a guy who famously took a bunch of pay cuts to stay with the Pats. And he didn’t exactly hide his frustration with Bill on his way out the door so this reunion may not be as automatic as some fans would like to think. I would welcome it with open arms though.

NBA Trade Deadline Deals with Biggest Impact on Celtics

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The Celtics were completely silent this year at the NBA trade deadline, which expired at 3 p.m. on Thursday, and I’m not technically upset about the inactivity; I said on Wednesday that I didn’t think they should do much at all, and that’s exactly what they did: diddly squat. Not one move, not even for cap space or “future considerations,” was made by Danny Ainge on Thursday.

Three of the other top-five teams battling for position in the East with you right now did make a move this week, however. And each of those moves was pretty significant, only improving each of those squads, which is a bit unsettling.

It doesn’t necessarily change my feelings on the Celts themselves; they’re still one of the top-four teams in the conference, but they are certainly not the ass-kicking, run-away No. 1 seed everyone thought they’d be. (But hey, winning 10-out-of-your-last-12 isn’t a bad way to start morphing into the squad, though. We’ll see.)

And most importantly, the best move that happened all day was the one that didn’t happen, as Anthony Davis is still a Pelican. (Red’s got a great piece here on just how huge this was for the C’s and speculates on how it could all shake out with The Brow going forward.)

Still, the point is there were a few teams around the Association that made some nice deals this week, with a few of them being other Eastern Conference powerhouses. There was also a trade out West that affects the future, as well as one that solidified Danny Ainge as the coldestttt GM in the league. (In a good way.)

Here are the biggest deals from this week that, while not involving the Celtics in any way, will still carry a lot of significance for the franchise – both now and in the future:

Tobias Harris Goes to Philly

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Already loaded with three studs in Joel Embiid, Jimmy Butler, and Ben Simmons, the Sixers added a guy who most casual fans may not know, but he is one that definitely now turns them into a “Big Four.” (That’s also not even counting J.J. Redick, who’s averaging 18 points a night. So, maybe even “Big Five” is more appropriate.) Harris’s career 15.3 points-per-game average might not be super impressive, but the 26-year-old forward did just average over 20 a contest in his 87 games with the Clippers. He’s also shooting a sparkling 43.4 percent from three-point range this season. The point is, the guy is another legit scorer for Philly, and he’s just one more piece to worry about. Sure, you beat them in five games in the Eastern Semis just eight months ago, but they didn’t have Harris (or Butler, for that matter). OH, and on top of that they added some bench depth with a few other deals too. Last year, they were talented and hungry but inexperienced; this year, they’re loaded and ready to battle with pretty much anyone. Philly got better this week, guys – a LOT better.

Marc Gasol Heading to Toronto

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After already nabbing a former Defensive Player of the Year this offseason in Kawhi Leonard, the Raptors went out yesterday and got another one by acquiring Marc Gasol from Memphis. Sure, he’s now 34 years old and it’s been six seasons since he won the award, so maybe he’s not quite as much of a force as he used to be. Still, though, I think talk of his “decline” has been highly exaggerated. His 15.7 PPG this year are right in line with his career average (15.2). Already a stellar rebounder, Gasol has also increased his output on the glass over the past two seasons, currently grabbing 8.6 rebounds a contest. (And if there’s any area in which you can attack this Celtics team, it’s down in the post with big bodies.) He’s also an elite passer through whom the entire offense can run when Leonard and/or Kyle Lowry need a rest. Already a top-10 offensive and defensive squad, Toronto is only further enhanced in both areas with Gasol. Even worse, much like Philly, they barely needed to give up anything in order to bring him in. (Jonas Valanciunas is a fine young player and still only 26, but you can find at least 15-20 other similar guys throughout the league. He’s a dime a dozen, and he’s nowhere remotely close to as good as the guy they just got to replace him in the lineup.) Currently sitting No. 2 in the East, things just got even better for fans up in The 6.

Bucks Land Mirotic

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I’ve always been a huge fan of Nikola Mirotic ever since he came over from Europe five seasons ago, even though this is the second straight year that he’s been dealt at the deadline. (He spent his first three seasons in Chicago before being dealt away to New Orleans last February.) A career 35-percent shooter from deep, the 6’10” stretch forward is taking over seven treys a game this year (on about 13 total shots per contest), so he will fit in perfectly on a Milwaukee team with the second most three-point attempts in the league. He’ll also open up even more space on the floor for MVP candidate Giannis Antetokounmpo. (That is absolutely frightening to think about.) And he’s a pretty decent rebounder, too. In sum, without trying to sound like a broken record, he is another guy who simply makes the team he went to immensely better than they already were.

As you can see, things really did just get a whole lot tougher for the Celtics in the East. The only other current top-five squad in the conference who did not make a big move this week was the Pacers, who now sit in front of the Celtics as the No. 3 seed after the Green’s loss to the Lakers on Thursday night.

There were also two other moves I want to highlight. These trades may not necessarily affect the Celtics all too much on the floor this season, but they still carry some noteworthy significance.

Harrison Barnes Going Back to Cali

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This was a trade between two Western Conference squads, one of which owes the Celtics their first-round pick next season; unfortunately, that team (Sacramento) is the one that got the better end of this deal. After serving as no better than the fourth-best option on a loaded Golden State roster for four years, Harrison Barnes finally got his chance to be a leading man when he signed a big free-agent deal with Dallas just before the 2016-17 season. And he’s rewarded them for doing so with over 18 points and five rebounds a night in 2.5 seasons. But, after acquiring Kristaps Porzingis last week, the Mavs needed to clear some space to re-sign him for the long-term. It’s going to be the Porzingis/Luka Doncic show in Big D from here on out, which meant Barnes needed to go. So, the Kings, who are playing wayyy better than anyone thought they would this season (No. 9 seed in the West), just got an All-Star caliber player for nothing more than an expiring contract (Zach Randolph) and a decent young player (Justin Jackson). They’re not a legit contender by any means, but they’re also not the bottom-feeder everyone expected they’d be. Therefore, their solid play has only continued to devalue the once-expected-to-be-premiere bargaining chip the Celtics thought they’d have in their pocket heading into this offseason. Barnes is only going to further enhance that issue.

Sixers Give Up on Fultz and Give Him Away to Orlando

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Even though the Celtics were not involved in this trade in any way, shape, or form, there’s no doubt that the clear-cut winner here was Danny Ainge. “Trader Danny,” the man whom has repeatedly swindled other GMs throughout the league – on numerous occasions – has done it again! After being in prime position to take Markelle Fultz – the unquestioned No. 1 prospect in the 2017 draft whom the rest of the league was salivating over – Ainge traded away the pick to Philly in exchange for the No. 3 pick that same year as well as a future first-rounder (which will likely turn out to be the Kings’ pick mentioned before). He was BLASTED by many in the media for trading away the top pick and the chance to land a “generational talent.” But what has Fultz done since entering the league? He’s played in a total of 33 games, shooting 41 percent overall and averaging just under eight points a game. Even when he has played, he’s looked completely lost at times, and many have seriously questioned his mental toughness. Maybe a change of scenery will help, but so far he’s been a real dud. Oh, and that No. 3 pick the Celtics got in that previously mentioned trade only turned out to be JAYSON TATUM. In the grand scheme of things, this deal doesn’t really have much impact on the Celtics either now or going forward, but Danny’s gotta feel prettayyy, pretttayyyy, pretayyyy good about this one.

So, even though the Celtics stood by and minded their business this week, it’s clear that the same certainly can’t be said for others around them. It’ll be interesting to see just how big of an impact each of these guys has in their new home. Regardless of what happens, though, at least we know we’re in for a fun second half of the NBA season!

City of Boston Cracks Down on Restaurants Along Parade Route

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Boston.com – Warm temperatures and sunny skies Tuesday brought a feeling of spring to the Patriots’ Super Bowl victory parade in Boston, but that didn’t mean restaurants along the route were allowed to open their seasonal patios.

Josephine Oliviero-Megwa, a partner with Ora Trattoriza at 653 Boylston St., found that out the hard way when three members of law enforcement stopped by the restaurant around 11:20 a.m…

Ora’s seasonal patio license runs from April 1 through Oct. 31, which covered the Red Sox’ victory parade, but not this one…

Boston police confirmed that five citations were issued to restaurants during the parade…

Now, Oliviero-Megwa has to go before the Boston Licensing Board, according to The Boston Globe. She said she doesn’t know if Ora will need to pay a fine, and, if so, what the amount would be.

To paraphrase old friend Rick Pitino, stuff like this makes the greatest city in the world lousy. Imagine the level of pettiness required to deem it necessary to issue these citations to restaurants on the day of a victory parade. Never mind the rampant underage drinking in the streets or all the two liter Rum and Cokes on the sidewalks. Ora opening the windows and pulling a few tables outside on a Tuesday in February is the real concern.

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As if inconveniencing thousands of working adults with a weekday parade weren’t enough, the City of Boston also decided to antagonize some small business owners along the parade route. God forbid a small business try to capitalize on some good fortune and make a few extra bucks during their slow season.

In the City of Minneapolis, bars usually close at 2 AM. When Minneapolis hosted the Super Bowl last year and the MLB All-Star Game in 2014, bars were able to stay open until 4 AM for the special occasions. Why can’t the City of Boston use some common sense and retroactively make an exception for victory parades on 60° days? Why must city leaders make doing business in Boston so difficult?

I’ve never had to go before the Boston Licensing Board, but I have argued parking tickets in person at city hall. My advice based on that experience is to just pay the fine. Don’t even give those humorless, insufferable bureaucrats the satisfaction of lecturing you. Hopefully the fine doesn’t totally offset the money you made on Tuesday.

Celtics Lose On a Buzzer Beater by Old Friend Rajon Rondo, But That Wasn’t the Worst Part

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Last night the Celtics blew an 18 point lead to LeBron and the Lakers and lost on a buzzer beater by our old friend Rajon Rondo. The Lakers were hotter than the sun as they set a franchise record for 3 pointers made.

LeBron was even using some sort of black magic while en route to another triple double he somehow converted a sloppy turnover down the stretch into a fadeaway three under pressure.

And then of course Rajon Rondo, whom I adore by the way, couldn’t hit a jump shot in 9 years in Boston yet corrals a loose ball and pulls up to hit a buzzer beater before I could even blink.

Unbelievable. Just look at Rondo’s shot chart over the course of his career, courtesy of our friends at NBAsavant.com.

Rondo is literally just as likely to hit a corner 3 as he is to hit that jumper at the elbow.

Whether its primetime games on ESPN and TNT or postseason games, Rajon Rondo morphs into Playoff Rondo every time the spotlight is on.

But that all paled in comparison to what we saw immediately after the game. My basketball nemesis LeBron James leaping for joy and hugging my man Rajon Rondo on the sacred Celtics hardwood.

That one hurt boys.