Tag: HBO

2020 In Review – Part I: The British Invasion

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By now the joke of how much of a shitshow the year of our lord 2020 has been played out fifty times over. So I’m not going to dive into it too much beyond saying that living 3/4 of the year on the business end of a global pandemic was not very fun.

The unique nature of such a year did come with an interesting side effect. Forced to stay inside and isolate ourselves, or at least hopefully more than we normally would, we saw the world unfold through our screens more than any other year in memory. I guess it is a bit sad to say it this way, but as we missed out on actually going out and experiencing life, we watched it happen. Through social media, the world wide web, and if you’re anything like apparently 86 year old friend of the blog Patty B, the news, we ingested second hand the major stories of 2020, from the bizarre to the sad to the tragic to an election. And we all saw it in basically real time.

So to put a stamp on this year I’m going to write a few blogs waxing poetic on some of the more major headlines as well as broader topics that caught our attention. In keeping with the tradition of the shit I normally write about, I’m going to skew boring old mainstream topics in favor of the odder, less obvious corners of pop culture. You are not going to read about the NBA rigging the title for it’s biggest cash cow (again) here. You aren’t going to read about your favorite pop star because I probably don’t know who they are. (Editor’s note: Read Joe’s blog on Taylor Swift’s new album here) You aren’t going to read about baseball because I don’t know if it’s still being played (is it?).

However, sports, TV, movies, music, and the like will all be touched in some capacity. I should note that I in no way intend to stick to a chronological order. I have a few things picked out and a few will probably come to me but whether it happened in May or February or two weeks ago I’m going to write it as fingers hit keys. Some of these will be short. Some of them long. All of them proof read at least .5 times. Let’s go.

The British Invasion

I have been teased for awhile now in my group of friends as the guy who watches British TV. To be more accurate I am teased for watching way too much British TV. But to present to you my argument I usually present to everyone else, it’s just better. Depending on the show it’s either highly realistic and reflective of real life or depicts life as a complete caricature of itself, there is no in between. Comedy-wise, There aren’t really any cheesy laugh tracks or bad one liners or tags. The acting is always sublime. When the characters hurt, they hurt, when they love, they love, when they laugh, they laugh. Whether the show is set in a real place or a fictional one, the universe is fully created, from local establishments to barely seen but fully fleshed fringe characters/townspeople. It’s grade A stuff.

Mid-pandemic, the streaming services (at least Netflix and Hulu) were starving for content. American productions had been shut down. I’m sure Netflix at least was suddenly regretting cancelling a number of fan favorites such as The Punisher and The OA. Hulu you could say was almost doubly fucked because they rely now rely on a mixture of views from a smaller but solid slate of originally programming and then the rights to currently airing network shows. Ya, the network shows that were also shut down. So what were they to do? They made a call across the pond.

It’s hard to really pinpoint when Americans became so enamored with British TV, as a novelty even. I remember my grandmother watching super old British “soaps” on the ancient tv in their kitchen growing up, There has always been, as it is true around the world, an American cult following of Doctor Who. But when did we become fully fledged fans? Again, hard to say. Luther came out in 2010 and made it’s way to Netflix not too long after. Teen shows like Skins and The Inbetweeners also found some popularity stateside around that time. Either way, American streaming services and premium providers needed to fill the gaps in their programming in 2020 and boy howdy, did they find the plug.

In a role reversal from the two previous world wars, the Brits were here to save the day. On the Netflix end, they leaned on, for the most part, promoting what they already had. Stalwarts like Marcella and new comers like Sex Education and The End of the Fucking World had put out new seasons within six months of the beginning of quarantine. They, along with less viewed series like Afterlife were given a huge push at the top of the Netflix dashboard/on the “you might like” banners. It was the freshest or fresh-ish content Netflix could provide and they leaned right into it.

On the Hulu side, things were a little more drastic. This summer they promoted and executed a massive upload of new British content to go along with offerings like Four Weddings and a Funeral and Killing Eve. Shows like Brassic and Boyhood were fairly well received and if nothing else, provided a binge worthy arc or two for a rainy, quarantined afternoon.

The premium networks also got into the British game. Debutante network AMC+ bought the rights to Gangs of London, which is now on most best of 2020 lists. They also have the US rights to Baptiste, a spinoff of The Missing featuring the eponymous French detective. HBO came on even stronger, releasing The Third Day while also utilizing the broadcasting rights to the rave reviewed and award winning I May Destroy You as well as investment banking world newcomer The Industry. All of this I find interesting as it is a tangible proof that the premiums are not just going to lie down in their battle with streaming services.

This past month(ish) Netflix put out The Queen’s Gambit, a show about chess of all things, to rave reviews, cementing British TV’s place in American culture. Whether it was always going to be this way or was a byproduct of being stuck inside and having to watch more TV, we’ll never know. I do know, however, in what is a sort of US-centric world pop culture -ise it has been nice to get a glimpse into how other entertainment industries view the every day lives of their countrymen. Hats off to the streaming services and premium channels for finally taking us along for the ride.

-Joey B.

Quarantine Q2 TV Recommendations

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The obvious question here and one that Red immediately brought up IS the fact that we are not remotely close to being in Q2. And that is true, we are not in Q2….of the year. We are however in our second set of three months of quarantine. Our second quarter-year stuck mostly inside lest we infect ourselves and those around us with the virus named after Dom Toretto’s favorite beverage.

The problem with where a lot of us are at in life and in quarantine is that the obvious choices and nominations for our binging pleasure have indeed been binged. There are fears out there that we may even run out of T.V. That is why, spoiler alert, streaming services are already resorting to throwing the metaphorical spaghetti against the wall in the form of uploading shows from other English speaking areas of the world such as the UK and Australia. They are also banking, with some success, that we’ve expanded our horizons enough to have the patience to deal with either dubs or subtitles and have pushed foreign shows to our monolingual asses.

These and a few others make up my second hack at aggregating what’s out there for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy.

Marcella (UK) – Netflix
(This may have been in the last binge blog but deserves another mention)

I may have noted in the past that FOTB Patty Blackouts has television tastes that run between police procedurals and the shittiest of reality T.V (Below Deck is his Sopranos). So needless to say I myself was shocked when I was able to hook him into this one. In Marcella, the titular character is drawn back onto the police force to hunt down a serial killer who has returned, despite the fact that her personal life is falling apart and she herself is in the throes of a perpetual psychotic break. If you like “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” you’ll like the familiar Nordic noir feel of this one, set in England and the UK aboard.

Dark (Germany) – Netflix

Grenga: Dark is a highly binge-able Sci-FI show, assuming you can get past the dubbing. It’s a mysterious ride through time that centers on 4 families in a small German town that is also home to a nuclear power plant. The first season is definitely confusing, but once you start to connect a few dots you can’t help but watch more. I haven’t finished the third season yet, but so far the show has lived up to it’s 95% Rotten Tomatoes rating.

Ladhood (UK) – Hulu

Hulu decided to just blatantly stage a British invasion of their platform, almost admitting they were running out of shit to promote. Ladhood might be the best of the bunch. In this interesting take of a coming of age tale, emotionally stunted, early-30’s Londoner Liam is probably a little more broken than he cares to admit (sound familiar). He tries to determine how this came to be by visiting scenes from his teenage years in Northern England, taking part as an audience member unseen by his younger self or friends as well as breaking the fourth wall to try and provide context. While it didn’t quite live up to what I wanted it to be it was a cool idea and definitely worth a watch. Here’s hoping for more seasons post-rona.

Hightown – Starz


We come back to Massachusetts for this round of attempted Boston accents and a fresh take on the opioid epidemic. Based on the Cape with a specific interest in Provincetown, Hightown centers on Jackie, a “fish cop” (National Marine Fishery Services Agent) who wants to have her cake and eat (snort) it too, enjoying all the carnal pleasures of living in PTown, New England’s gay capital, while investigating a murder off the books. Her moonlighting intersects with and gets in the way of an annoyed Statie Detective, Ray, whose not totally legit investigation into a drug trafficking ring is related to Jackie’s own search.


Stateless  (Australia) – Netflix

Fuck. A. Duck. Not only did I not see this one coming but when it arrived I did not expect to care. But here we are. This emotional, perfectly acted, gripping miniseries follows four separate but intertwined characters at an Australian detention center for refugees – an Aussie who thanks to a cult causing a psychotic break thinks she’s German; a guard who took the well-paying, government funded job with the center’s contractor to give his family a better life; a bureaucrat who is trying to keep the center’s as well as the refugee detention policy’s reputation above water, and an Afghan refugee desperate to give himself and his missing family the life he dreams for them. You can only imagine.


The Umbrella Academy – Netflix

Red: I’ll have a full blog about this later as I just finished season 1, but The Umbrella Academy is a quarantine must watch for anyone who’s into sci-fi, graphic novels, time travel, and just generally weird shows. You definitely have to kind of go with it in this show since it really leans into the weirdness, but hey that’s to be expected when you base a show off a comic written by the lead singer from My Chemical Romance.

Gomorrah – HBO Max

First things first from what I understand if you have HBO you probably have HBO Max for free although the Home Box Office has done a terrible fuckin job rolling this thing out. Anyway, I won’t try and lie, I’ve never watched Gomorrah. But I’ve been told it’s actually one of the best shows out there and I saw recently it was ranked the #5 foreign show of the decade. By the New York Times maybe? Anyway here’s the wikipedia rundown:

“Set in the suburbs of Naples, Italy, the crime drama goes inside the Camorra, a fierce Neapolitan crime organization led by Pietro Savastano. The story is told through the eyes of Don Pietro’s right-hand man, Ciro Di Marzio, whose faith in the family is tested when he realizes how far Don Pietro is willing to go to keep his power.“

“F” Is For Family – Netflix

This serves as more of a reminder that a new season of Bill Burr’s hilarious cartoon dropped during quarantine. The lightly-autobiographical tale of a working class family in the 70’s remains absolutely hysterical, something we all need right now.

The Sopranos – HBO

WATCH THE FUCKING SOPRANOS YOU UNAMERICAN FUCKS.

The “Snyder Cut” of Justice League is Coming to HBO Max

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ComicBook.com – Warner Bros. announced today that the Snyder Cut version of Justice League will be making its debut on HBO Max. It’s been over two years since Justice League opened in theaters and since then, while the film has largely fallen out of the general cultural conversation, it’s been very much alive with fans. Many of whom have been pleading with and demanding that Warner Bros. release the so-called “Snyder Cut” of the film.

Fans determined to see director Zack Snyder’s version of the DC team-up film have been passionate, online and off in their efforts to get the version brought to screen and now, those efforts have paid off…Earlier this month, a report indicated that Snyder held a private screening of his version of Justice League during the first quarter of 2020 with Warner Bros. executives in attendance. The report indicated that the screening may have gotten the wheels turning for something involving Snyder’s vision for the film – a version that Snyder himself has confirmed exists with at least some completed CGI.

If theres been one positive to this whole dumpster fire coronavirus quarantine is that it’s forced the hands of every entertainment company in the world to get creative with its content. We’ve been hearing about the #SnyderCut for 2+ years after director Zack Snyder left Justice League before finishing it, only to see the project completed (and tweaked) without him and ultimately panned by critics and fans as yet another mixed bag of mediocrity from DC. Well after years of incessant tweeting from DC fan boys with claims of how the #SnyderCut would have been entirely different and made for a better film…this better not suck. Snyder has taken up the mantle of twitter fans, which is a risky endeavor because expectations have long since gone past the point of reasonable. It could be an incredible movie that resurrects Justice League and turns it into what we all hoped it would be…or it could be a gigantic letdown after three years of hype from fans based on blind hope.

It does seem like HBO Max is serious about this though because there is some serious work going into it. Obviously as an unfinished cut of a superhero movie there is likely loads of CGI that needs to be put together. Hollywood Reporter is saying $20-$30 million was put into finishing the project and the #SnyderCut could premiere as a FOUR HOUR director’s cut like he’s Billy Walsh.

“This is my fucking deer hunter.” – Billy Walsh” – Zack Snyder

Probably because I am a gigantic nerd, but I have an affinity for comic book or video game movies gone awry because so often immense potential is wasted and a monumental IP is shelved because of it. Looking at you live action Dragon Ball movie…

How did Emmy Rossum get cast in that piece of crap? And how did it double its original ($30M) budget at the box office? I’m getting off track…

Seriously after all we’ve heard about the #SnyderCut, this better be good or Zack Snyder might just get put in the Disney Vault by Hollywood execs. The DC Universe was one of the most frustrating, up and down collection of movies in recent memory. Man of Steel was pretty good, not amazing, but Henry Cavill was a great Superman and you could see the potential. Batman vs Superman had an absolutely incredible trailer, but ended up being a convoluted mess despite solid performances from Cavill, Ben Affleck as the new Batman, and Gal Gadot in a career making performance as Wonder Woman. Suicide Squad was similar with an awesome trailer and a finished product that left you scratching your head despite solid performances from Will Smith as Deadshot and Margot Robbie as a perfectly cast Harley Quinn. And after that I think like a lot of people I kind of just lost interest. I have yet to see Aquaman, despite my bro crush on Khal Drogo, Shazam, or Birds of Prey. I’ve heard at least 2/3 of those movies are surprisingly good, but there is zero cohesion between any of these movies as the DC Extended Universe ultimately collapsed on itself.

Affleck is out as Batman and theres been lingering rumors about Cavill exiting sooner than later so the DCEU is basically on life support. Gal Gadot’s mega hit Wonder Woman and the sheer charisma of Margot Robbie are the only thing keeping this whole experiment of the DCEU from getting put on ice.

So now we get the #SnyderCut, which if you believe the internet message boards is an entirely different and much improved film than what we all saw in the final version of Justice League. Granted I watched this movie on a 6 inch screen on a cross country flight, but it was just a mixed bag of forgettable scenes with Joss Whedon quippy dialogue shoehorned in.

**Spoiler Alert*** If you still haven’t seen it after two months of quarantine you might as well just pop it in and give it a go. It’s not terrible, but it is forgettable. The only thing I really remember from this movie was the predictable return of Superman after he was killed at the end of Batman vs Superman. Except because this movie required extensive reshoots, Cavill was already filming Mission Impossible where his character rocks a sweet sweet mustache. Well the studio for MI wouldn’t let him shave it so DC had to digitally remove Cavill’s mustache for some Superman scenes, which left us with one of my favorite images from any superhero flick.

Laugh out loud funny.

If you’re not familiar with the back story, Snyder left Justice League after the tragic death of his daughter so the studio brought in Marvel darling and Avengers director Joss Whedon to finish the movie. Except if you’ve ever seen the Avengers and compare it to literally anything Snyder has done (Superman, Batman vs Superman, Sin City, 300) they have diametrically opposing styles. Whedon’s work is bright and fully of quippy dialogue whereas Snyder has a lot of dark, brooding, gritty tones. So to throw Whedon in for the final leg as he noticeably tries to lighten up the final product, it just doesn’t gel. Hence the outcry for the #SnyderCut.

Now what the hell could possibly be that different about this original cut that would make the movie that much better? I mean Jason Momoa has been beating this drum forever and recently Gadot and Affleck joined in to champion this version of the movie. So it would have to be significantly different right? Well Phil Owen from The Wrap had a pretty interesting theory on how differently things could go in the #SnyderCut based on footage from the original trailer that wasn’t used and/or reworked.

there are items in “Batman v Superman” clearly intended to set up a very specific plot thread that never came to be — and those items are not referenced in “Justice League” at all. I’m talking about Bruce Wayne’s nightmare of an apocalyptic future in which Superman is evil, and the subsequent visit from what seems to be a time-traveling Flash warning Bruce about what Superman will become should Lois Lane be killed…So they at some point assemble the team and resurrect Superman inside the Kryptonian scout ship in Metropolis by some means –the Mother Box may not have been necessary given that the Kryptonians used that pool of amniotic fluid to make babies. After they bring Superman back, he goes crazy in the same way he does in the finished film, but his fight against the Justice League goes on much longer and doesn’t end with him reverting to normal. The government even gets involved, bringing tanks into the fight that Superman of course easily handles. However it ends, Superman does not go visit Kansas with Lois afterward, because that scene in the movie was a reshoot addition.

It’s possible that Lois shows up to try to calm him down and she is killed in the chaos (or something happens that somehow makes him think she’s killed), and it’s likely that Superman continues to be not quite right the rest of the movie and becomes the threat that Batman feared and which the Flash warned him about in “Batman v Superman.”

It would be a very Snyder-esque payoff to the the themes set up in the early goings — the idea that Superman was a beacon who gave the people of Earth a moral center, and whose death threw everyone into disarray. They bring him back but he no longer functions as that beacon of goodness, which in turn makes the moral situation on Earth that much murkier. It would make sense, too, that even an angry Superman would amass followers willing to fight, for him as we saw in Batman’s nightmare.

This would make so much more sense to have a legitimately menacing and dangerous Superman wreaking havoc for more than the 5 minutes he does in the final version of the film. Why all that build up for what amounts to a temper tantrum? I definitely recommend giving Owen’s article a read as a lot of his ideas work a lot better in theory than the final film, which completely punts on Darkseid in favor of hitting the wrap it up box with the undeveloped motivation of a forgettable villain in Steppenwolf.

I don’t know what to expect, but I’ll be checking it out for sure, which is all HBO can ask for with its latest venture HBO Max. If you’re a DirecTV subscriber like me you’ll get HBO Max for free. Otherwise things get kind of confusing based on who your provider is and you may have to pony up for the new streaming channel, even if you already pay for HBO.

While there is no concrete release date, HBO Max says to expect the #SnyderCut of Justice League in 2021 so it could be a while before we see it.

What Song Does the HBO Intro Remind You of First?

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I saw this question posed on Twitter somewhere, but can’t find the original tweet so here we are. Now I have a feeling the answers are going to skew wildly here. Everyone has an HBO show that they watched religiously before the fracturing of content with social media and streaming. These days I watch so many shows on so many platforms I don’t really associate them with any one channel. Back in the day though you’d have to wait all week for your next fix and come Sunday night when that HBO static noise drops its like the first drip of morphine.

Disclaimer: This is not a list of the *best* HBO shows, this is a list of what hits your brain first when you hear the opening static. The Sopranos is an all-time show, but I was 10 when it started so I only watched episodes here and there with my dad in later seasons. I didn’t even properly binge Sopranos until last year, so go ahead and shame me if you want, but Tony’s fate in my rankings is not as ambiguous as that finale was.

With so many all-time shows and cult classic series, what song does the HBO Intro remind you of first?

3.) True Detective

The first season of True Detective is one of the few instances of TV in the past decade that was appointment viewing. The HBO Opening followed by that creepy Bayoux theme song was a one two punch that had me glued to my seat no matter what. There could have been a fire in my kitchen and I would have let my shitty Allston apartment burn just so I could try and figure out who the Yellow King was.

2.) Game of Thrones

Pound for pound my favorite TV show of all time and one that changed the game forever, despite some minor (massive) missteps over the final season or two. This was a show you couldn’t afford to miss the opening seconds so the dog was walked, the snacks were set up, and the lights were dimmed at 8:58 pm leaving nothing but silence in my house as that sweet, sweet HBO Opening hit followed by one of the greatest opening sequences in TV history. I literally went to a Ramin Djawadi concert just to hear this played by a live orchestra and it was some of the best money I ever spent.

1.) Entourage

For me the hands down No. 1 in the Power Rankings is Entourage. I readily admit a lot of this has to do with the age I was when Entourage was starting off and hitting its stride, but when I hear that HBO static the first thing I think of is Vinny and the boys. This show was just straight up fun to watch with your buds so it’s probably just a dopamine connection in my brain. Did the show become formulaic in its later seasons? Sure, but that doesn’t change the fact that my brain is hardwired to play Jane’s Addiction in my head as soon as I hear the HBO Intro.

So who ya got?

PS – The honorable mention that didn’t make this list is Ballers. I don’t even really associate Ballers with the HBO Opening (hence not making the list), but tell me you can’t think of The Rock just crushing deals every time you hear Lil Wayne and Drake’s “Right Above It.”

A List of the Top Tom Brady Documentaries, Cameos, and Skits to Watch While Self Quarantining

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Tom Brady will soon be holding up the jersey of another team and I fully expect that sight to make me weep and/or vomit. So in the meantime while we’re all self quarantining anyways, lets break open the Disney Vault and go through all of the best Tom Brady documentaries, cameos, and skits from over the years.

The Brady 6
If you’ve never seen this NFL Films doc, it is pure Tom Brady porn so make sure you do it alone. It details all the bums drafted ahead of Brady and how all their careers played out. “He has four goats” is still the greatest ether these ears have ever heard.

The Great Brady Heist
A relatively recent addition to the Brady archives, I just caught this one on FOX Sports 1 last night and it was *electric.* If you’re a fan of true crime docs then this one is for you because it details how TB12 had his Super Bowl LI jersey stolen right out of his locker after completing the greatest comeback in sports history and how the authorities got it back.

Tom vs Time
This is a quick watch as most episodes are only 10-15 minutes long, but this Facebook Watch exclusive was a fascinating look behind the curtain into Tom Brady’s every day life. His family at home, his relationship with Alex Guerrero, post game phone calls with Josh McDaniels etc. It also offered a now prophetic glimpse into Brady’s future plans as the shine wore off with Belichick.

Three Games to Glory (Take your pick)
These were difficult to find on the interwebs aside from a few clips here and there as they are the DVDs produced and sold directly by the Patriots. So you may need to pony up to see them all, but it never hurts to build out the collection.

Peyton’s Places with Tom Brady
The full 30 minute episode is available only on ESPN+ so you might not be able to watch it for free, but this was a great piece of content. If you still blindly hate Peyton Manning and can’t get past that to watch these two legends chop it up, you’re missing out.

America’s Game: New England Patriots
These are the NFL Network documentaries of the Super Bowl champs they do every year. I’m sure you’ve seen some or all of these, but holy hell are there a lot of episodes on the Patriots! Take your pick: 2001, 2003, 2004, 2014, 2016, 2018. My personal favorite is the 2001 episode, solely because it features a *young* Tom Brady sharing what Drew Bledsoe told him on the sidelines during the game.

Do Your Job Bill Belichick and the 2014 New England Patriots
Another masterfully produced documentary from NFL Films, this one breaks down the 2014 Patriots season. It’s definitely more of a focus on Bill, but you get some great Tom Brady highlights in there.

A Football Life: Bill Belichick
Again this is another NFL Films doc that focuses primarily on Belichick, but you get some delicious interviews and mic’d up clips of Tom Brady. Released in 2011, you get never before seen footage, most notably after the 2009 beatdown from the Saints on MNF, Brady is shown venting to Bill how he “can’t get these guys to play the way I need them to play.” It’s actually two parts, both of which you can watch below.

Detail: Peyton Manning on Tom Brady
This is another ESPN+ exclusive and is one I haven’t checked out yet, but Detail is an excellent watch if you’re into the X’s and O’s.

Entourage – “Fore!”
One of the best cameos on a show that had multiple per episode so thats saying something. Brady dominates in all facets of life including on the links and even befriending dick head New Yorkers. Check this Season 6 episode out on HBO Go.

Ted 2
Two words. Golden. Balls.

Jimmy Kimmel Skit
Matt Damon just can’t catch a break.

Saturday Night Live
Tom Brady hosted SNL once and only once, back in 2005 and he absolutely killed. Probably because of the times we live in now and the #MeToo movement, but the laugh out loud funny Sexual Harassment PSA skit has all been scrubbed from the internet. But I still found it.

The First Game of Thrones Prequel Got Axed, But “House of the Dragon” Was Greenlit

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IGN – Game of Thrones’ planned prequel series is no longer going forward at HBO.
After a pilot for the Naomi Watts-starring series was filmed earlier this year, the network has opted not to move forward with the untitled Game of Thrones spinoff..Set 5,000 years before the events of Game of Thrones, the prequel would have explored the Age of Heroes and likely key historical figures like Bran the Builder — but, notably, wouldn’t feature the Targargyens. Martin had said that while the Starks and direwolves will be featured in the show, it would be a different Westeros than what fans are used to.

The Game Of Thrones universe really has taken a lot of blows over the last 6 months. Yesterday we got news of David Benioff and DB Weiss getting 86’d from Star Wars and now HBO isn’t picking up The Long Night prequel series despite already shooting a pilot.

To be honest a prequel starring Naomi Watts and focusing on characters like Bran the Builder, pre-Targaryens, pre-White Walkers, pre-7 kingdoms didn’t really sound all that interesting. Well, it looks like HBO agreed.

However I am a schill for anything Thrones related so I will watch anything and everything they put out. It would be interesting to see the buildup to the first appearance of the White Walkers and hopefully get some actual meat on the bones around their origin. If you recall this scene from Season 1, Old Nan tells Bran a story about The Long Night, which took place thousands of years before the Game of Thrones we know and love.

A lot of Thrones news has broken this week, including Benioff and Weiss deciding to leave (i.e. got fired) the next Star Wars trilogy they were hired to develop. Benioff and Weiss basically admitted in a recent Q&A not even understanding the GoT characters until they were *forced* to write more scenes due to contractual obligations.

Who admits that?? Seriously, just look at some of the exchanges these two gave.

I understand its supposed to be self deprecating and tweets don’t convey tone and context, which can mean a lot, but these guys are basically confirming what every one of their critics has been hammering them on since Season 8 ended.

It would seem like the next best bet of seeing Thrones on your TV any time in the near future would be HBO picking up the script for George RR Martin’s Targaryen prequel “Fire and Blood,” which takes place hundreds of years before Thrones and focuses on how the Targaryen dynasty came to be.

[Update: HBO officially teased it last night]

Thankfully, Miguel Sapochnik is attached as executive producer and director which is great news since he directed some of the best Thrones episodes ever. Sapochnik directed Battle of the Bastards (which won an Emmy), Hardhome (wildlings battle with White Walkers), Winds of Winter (Cersei blowing up the Sept), as well as Season 8 eps The Long Night (battle with the White Walkers at Winterfell) and The Bells (Khaleesi destroying Kings Landing).

Yes House of the Dragon is based on the prequel Martin wrote while he was too busy to finish writing the main books that would have saved the TV show. Benioff and Weiss got exposed badly in the last 2 seasons once the play by play directions (and dialogue) from Martin were no longer there. The internet mob has already played judge, jury, and executioner with Benioff and Weiss earning all the blame for the meh Season 8. But Martin should get just as much blame, especially after working with those two guys for a decade. He knew what they were and what they weren’t actually creating and he probably knew the show would take a hit once his playbook wasn’t there for them to lean on. So he decided to write a 736 page history of the Targaryens instead of finishing the only important Game of Thrones story.

What the fuck man?

Thats negligent malpractice on Martin’s part so that final Game of Thrones novel better be the best goddamn book since the Bible.

PS – I know its too closely tied to the show that literally just ended, but give me a mini-series of Robert’s Rebellion and I would watch the shit out of that. Everyone already knows the key characters so you don’t need to spend years building it up. Get in, get out, make a billion dollars.

“Euphoria” is Worth Your Time

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Warning: Mild spoilers ahead.

Particularly in this day and age, people like to discuss what they are currently watching on T.V. I say particularly in this day and age, and I specify “currently”, because we’ve passed the time when there is a “TV season” of sorts that lasts from the fall through the spring and then you’re stuck watching either a handful of summer shows or reruns. The advent of streaming services and On Demand means that at any given time you could be at the beginning, middle, or end of your ingestion of a brand new show, whether it is still running, just ended, or has long since gone to the TV heaven in the sky (sup Twin Peaks?).

Perhaps the most satisfying part of discussing T.V is suggesting a show to a friend, having them actually watch it, and then having them actually enjoy. If you go 3/3 then that is legitimately cathartic, but convincing someone to allow your suggestion to skip their predictably endless queue is a reward in itself. But it’s a tricky science, there’s some salesmanship involved. The sugestee has to be willing and the suggestor has to have enough of a hook to make the show worth giving a shot to. Indeed I’ve tried in vain to convince my own EIC to watch Peaky Blinders for years now to no avail.

A common question one might receive when suggesting a T.V show is “what is it like?” Someone asking this is looking for a reference point. An example in their memory bank they can leverage to determine if said program is worth taking time out of their busy schedule to indulge in. And this is where I get to the point of the blog. Because although shows like Euphoria have come along before, it indeed has its unique qualities, most notably in the production and presentation, that makes the “what is it like?” question an interesting one.

Firstly, to get this out there, we don’t, and won’t stick to T.V here with these comparisons, to use the plural of “comparison” should I ever play this game again. It’s fair game to reference movies as well. As the only difference, from 1,000 ft., is the amount of time those involved wish to take to tell a story.  Cool? Cool.

But with that said, to bring up past showcases of teenage disenchantment, struggles, issues, and longing, we should start with a couple of small screen predecessors all the same. While I don’t see a ton of similarities with the two big names from the 90’s, Freaks and Geeks and My So Called Life, they did feature female leads who are sort of outcasts, and of course totally over it. That sarcasm that evokes the 90s never went away, particularly when it involves teenage girls. There are some tiny similarities between Euphoria and The O.C, in terms of economic status being a key pillar of high school coolness, but that could be said of legit 50% of T.V and movies that focus on human interaction. Then there is Degrassi, which Euphoria has been compared to a lot. I just don’t see it. While the long-running Canadian show was possibly the first to dive into issues as deep as teenage domestic violence, the entire feeling of the show wastoo sentimental, at least to me. As I’ll get to later, Euphoria isn’t want to sentimentality.

In terms of having a couple of characters from each archetype represented and explored, it is easy to start out on the movie side of things with “The Breakfast Club”. I see a lot of the Hughes classic in Euphoria. The major difference of course is while the new HBO hit deals with substance abuse, sexuality, and volatile relationships, the ultimate 80’s movie dealt with angst and pretty much angst only. It’d be too easy to look at a movie like Thirteen and make connections. That movie, however, did not aspire to find hope the way Euphoria does.

So where does that leave us?

If you asked me, Joseph of the House Ballgame, Scriber of the Outrageous, Fighter of the Inanimate, the “what is it like?” question, I’d bring up two examples.

1. Skins
2. “Rules Of Attraction”

If you’ve read any of my stuff or have seen my avatar, you know I’m an ardent fan of Skins, the mid-00’s to early 10’s anthology about the life of hard-partying, harder-loving teenagers in Bristol, England. I describe it to friends as a more blue-collar, degenerate, debaucherous version of the The O.C, but that is just simplify things for an ignorant audience. Skins consisted of three pairs of two season (plus an odd “where are they now”-ish season). Each consisted of  an (almost) entirely new cast, centered around a group of (sometimes unlikely) friends in their last two years of high school. They drank. They fucked. They loved. They hated. It got both really real and completely over the top, to speak from the perspective of someone who has been through high school before. Where it really intersects with Euphoria is where it uses a single character for the centerpiece of each episode, seeing the events of that episode through their lens and allowing the audience to feel their feelings. Due to the fact that it was located in Europe and not the US, and Europeans are in fact not pussies, it also dove into issues much more problematic for audiences to process. From abuse, to abandonment, to eating disorders, to substance abuse, to mental illness WELL BEFORE it became such a common topic, Skins feared no unturned stone. It also had a way of being honest with who its characters were. Even when complete assholes were given redemption stories, the show never shied away from the fact that they were indeed still assholes.

“Rules Of Attraction” may have come as a bit of a curve ball on my list of two comparisons. Mostly because it is about college students. However, it does share a couple of common elements with Euphoria. The first is that like Skins, it focuses in on a character at a time, dissecting them down to the marrow. You see what led them to that moment in time, the good and the bad. Whether you want to know or not.

The second part of what makes the Bret Easton E;lis adaptation so similar to Euphoria, at least for me, is a bit more nuanced. Despite the hope and dare I say underlying inspiration that Euphoria seemingly wants to purvey at times, it also presents. in my opinion, its character breakdowns in a cold, clinical way. These are their backgrounds, these are their traits. These are their flaws, that probably won’t be fixed. Not matter how sad, how terrifying. How fatal. “Rules Of Attraction” features the same, emotionless description of the players involved, though perhaps with even a hint of menace.

So at this point you’re probably asking yourself why the hell you should watch this show. To see the youth of today in such turmoil can’t possibly be a source of entertainment can it?

Yes, yes it can.

To more fully flesh out the plot, Euphoria is told through the voice of Rue, a Jr. in high school who takes us through her struggle to get and try and stay sober (opiates is implied as her drug of choice) by describing the lives and circumstances of a number of her as mentioned archetyped high school classmates, only a few months removed from a near fatal overdose. How she weaves her tale of High School’s complicated universe and ties it all back to her own life and harrowing journey is where the magic lies. Is she telling us all this because she sees a little of herself in everyone? Is she worried that she might? Or is she embittered that they all think they have it so bad but none have it as bad as her? I know, teenagers, amirite?

There’s something to be said of all options, for as in depth as Rue examines her peers, she allows us to see her own self examination as well – the losses she’s suffered, her  undefined sexuality, her vacillation between apathy and deeply caring about her sobriety. Most of the time you can’t help but care for kid. But sometimes, ya, she’s kind of an asshole.

The show builds and progresses well, although it eschews episode-to-episode cliffhangers for slower builds and mid-installment twists and conclusions. You’ll be happy for Rue and her crew one moment, especially best friend and possible love interest, trans free spirit Jules, and you’ll be crushed and afraid for them the next.

Euphoria has been picked up for a seasons 2 and as I hear the actress that plays Rue’s stock is skyrocketing it could be last which is a shame. I don’t get why they had to end Skins (fucking Brits letting the ratings drop more than all that tea probably. Zinggggg). There’s no reason they can’t morph Euphoria itself into a similar anthology-type show should the Rue character not be sustainable. That said, HBO is not as attached to long runs the way Showtime is so that isn’t probable. But I digress. Watch the damn show. Feel some feels. Maybe you went through some similar shit or maybe you observed it from afar. Either way maybe you’ll learn something about yourself, in hindsight.

-Joey B.

Oh HELL YES: Oakland Raiders Selected as This Year’s Hard Knocks Team

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Image result for jon gruden

HELL EFFING YES!

On Wednesday, it was announced that the Oakland Raiders would be the team featured on this year’s version of HBO’s “Hard Knocks,” which is set to air, per usual, during training camp in August. Merry freakin’ Christmas, NFL fans.

No matter which NFL team you root for, there is truly no better choice than this year’s version of the Black & Silver to serve as the show’s main attraction in 2019. I would literally kill to be a fly on the wall at Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum this year. Just being able to take a peek behind the curtain of what will likely be an absolute circus act all year long will truly be a treat for even the most casual NFL fan.

My goodness. This is going to be fun.

For starters, there’s Jon Gruden, the cartoon character of a head coach who could honestly provide enough entertainment just by himself to fill a whole entire season of television. This dude has always been a ham for the camera, and while he may come out and act like he’s annoyed by the entire process, you know that deep inside he will eat this stuff up. There will be no shortage of ridiculous quips, over-the-top outbursts, and just pure, fun, unadulterated Jon Gruden-ness.

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After what was one of the ugliest superstar-team breakups in recent memory, new Raider and All-World wide receiver Antonio Brown will also be on center stage. Though I’ve soured quite a bit on the man personally after the way he’s acted over the past year or so, you know he’s not going to shy away from the camera either. In fact, he could become even more unlikable by the show’s end depending on the level of D-baggery he displays. Regardless, those type of polarizing figures do great for the ratings, so you can be sure that HBO will be all about A.B. this summer.

Speaking of unlikable players, linebacker Vontaze Burfict – quite possibly the cheapest, dirtiest player in NFL history – is also on the squad this season. There may be no greater villain than this guy in a lot of NFL circles, and some are surprised he hasn’t been kicked out of the league entirely by this point. OH, and the guy who was on the receiving end of one of Burfict’s most egregious helmet-to-helmet hits ever was none other than the aforementioned Antonio Tavaris Brown. So I’m sure they will greet each other quite warmly at camp this summer. (*He said with heavy sarcasm.*) You can’t make this stuff up.

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AND how can we forget about Richie Icognito??!! Speaking of guys who are lucky to even still be allowed on the field, there may be no more volatile athlete in the world right now than the ticking time bomb that is Icognito. When he’s on his game, he is indeed one of the league’s best O-lineman, but when he snaps, HO-LEE HELL. (Seriously, just Google the man’s troubled history.) I’m not trying to make light of the personal angst the man has suffered due to what should be considered serious mental-health illness, and apparently he’s made great strides recently, which is awesome. But the potential for an absolute explosion with him – especially in this type of environment – is always very real, and Oakland better have eyes on this dude all the time. Maybe he’ll be on his best behavior in front of the cameras. We’ll see.

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There’s also the whole Derek Carr saga. Once looking like he was tracking toward becoming one of the game’s elite QBs, Carr has had an up-and-down past few seasons, and the Raiders even toyed with the idea of bringing in a new guy to lead the way in 2019. They ultimately decided to roll with Carr once again, but how Carr responds to the rumors – which were in NO way quieted by Gruden, who has actually been one of Carr’s biggest critics – will be interesting to see. Also, after last year’s damning report about his “fractured relationship” with teammates and his “on-field crying,” he won’t be able to hide with camera crews in his face every day for weeks on end. (Is it bad that I’m expecting [and maybe, sorta, kinda hoping for] a big meltdown by Episode 3? Anyone else?)

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There’s also fantasy implications for those who want to see how rookie running back Josh Jacobs looks. He is expected to be the team’s bell cow this year after being selected in the first round of the draft in April. Other talented guys like Tyrell Williams and a strong rookie class should also help to make Oakland a much more enjoyable team to watch going forward, too.

And above all, it’ll be interesting to see how what was once one of the NFL’s most revered franchises tries to make its way back toward relevance after serving as one of the league’s biggest laughing stocks for well over a decade now.

And that’s just the beginning…

We still have about a month and a half before we get to view what should be an absolutely incredible television masterpiece, but at least we all have something to look forward to while waiting for the real, meaningful action to begin. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU, HBO and whoever had the authority to make this decision for the NFL.

Buckle up, guys. This is going to be quite the ride.

We Finally Have Our First Trailer for Westworld Season 3

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As soon as I saw my guy Aaron Paul on the screen I shouted WESTWORLD at my TV because I’ve been waiting for this. Adding an actor like him to a show at a crossroads like Westworld currently sits is huge. Westworld ended an up and down Season 2 with a peak at what could happen with the hosts making their way into the real world. It seems like they’ve fully integrated and/or taken over the real world in a terrifying way. As Aaaron Paul says he’s just searching for something real, which could bring Westworld into a suddenly much more relatable show. This could potentially transition Westworld from a pure sci-fi show about robots into a more literal commentary on a dystopian future.

Oh and we get Kid Cudi in something other than “How to Make It In America” so thats exciting.

I am all in from the looks of this trailer.

In Honor of Game of Thrones Returning, I Give You The Top 5 GOT Characters

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As everyone except those living a Ted Kaczynski-esque existence in the northern frontier of our nation knows, “Game Of Thrones” returns this Sunday for its 8th season. As most of those people understand, this will also be the final season and, indeed, the end of an era. The $50 million dollar gamble (which sounds cheap compared to later seasons) almost immediately cemented itself in the upper echelons of pop culture, becoming as well know for driving plot lines with not exactly relatable subjects such as incest, witchcraft, and castration as it has for weaving one of the most magnetic stories television has ever seen over the course of almost a decade.

While the dragons soared, the battles fought, and the bastards brooded, the latest classic delivered by the Home Box Office (“The Wire,” “The Sopranos,” GOT this is getting ridiculous) produced, as their shows tend to do, some absolutely classic characters. Ones you can quote. Ones you want to have a beer with. Ones you want to beat the ever loving shit out of. Characters that just evoke intense, human reactions and emotions from the millions upon millions of people that have watched the show.

So I’ve decided to give you a Top 5. The top 5 best characters. Now, you are not getting a surface-level “most screen time,” “who drives the story the most?” list here. No, while things like how much they are are actually on the show were accounted for, I really wanted to dive deep into these characters’ Id. Of the endless faces and names (for sure not the same count, after all) we have seen since 2011, I wanted to deduce who really reeled us in to their mind, body, and soul the most. Who made us sit up whenever they went to give a monologue? Who did we realize in our borderline-insane attempt at a six week re-watch was as indispensable as the Wall?

With the help of a few of my fellow bloggers I set out to answer those questions and more. Enjoy.

Honorable Mentions
Tormund Gianstsbane
Blogger Note: I hate to not rank Tormund, both because I love the character and Dom helped me out with the blog. But I just couldn’t justify a top 5 spot. Every man has a code.
Dom: “Gotta love Tormund Giantsbane. In addition to being a brute and a warrior, he’s also one of those guys who can actually tell the difference between good and evil. On top of that, he’s fucking hilarious. From creepy side eyes at Brienne to life advice for Jon Snow to this amazing conversation with the Hound, he’s pure gold all the time.”

Missandei and Greyworm
The realms true “couple goals” culminated in what I can only imagine was some voracious foreplay, judging by Khaleesi and Missandei’s giggling fit. Either way, the bond these two have coming from broken backgrounds and ending up at the side of the most powerful woman in their world is pretty special. Every time they interact they seem like they aren’t expecting to see each other ever again and it is both heartbreaking and endearing.

Quote:
Greyworm: Wounded in war, there is no shame for this. I am ashamed because when the knife go in and I fall to the ground, I am afraid.
Missandei: All men fear death
Greyworm: No, not death. I fear I never again see Missandei from the Isle of Naath.

The Top 5

5.) Ser Davos Seaworth


I know, I know, I spurn Tormund then rank Ser Davos. What the fuck, right? But bear with me. Davos from day one represented the purest intentions with the strongest of convictions in the 7 kingdoms. He began as the fiercely loyal right hand to a man he knew to be as flawed as he was great and has continued on as an older foil to Jon Snow’s Starkian code of only the most undiluted honor. When he speaks you listen, because it is nothing but blue collar, honest truth he is spitting.

Quote:
(With the mutineers breaking down the door) “I’m not much of a fighter…Apologies for what you’re about to see.”

4.) Bronn (Ser Bronn of the Blackwater)


Red: “I gotta go with Bronn. He’s what every man wants to be; careless, reckless, and often legless. Bronn is also sneaky one of the most dangerous men in the 7 kingdoms. Throw in some killer one liners and Bronn is the clear choice as the best character in Game of Thrones.”

Quote:
Bronn:  There’s this knight, uh, Leygood. Got thunderbolts on his shield?
Jaime: Uh-huh.
Bronn: Right here is where I fuck his wife. She’s a screamer, that one. If they don’t hear her, they won’t hear us.

3.) Robb Stark

Yup, that’s right, a guy who died years ago. I don’t care. During my re-watch I was reminded just how good Robb Stark was. Above all else, he was intense. That is such an overused, cliched word but everything King Robb said was layered in desperation, frustration, urgency, and at the same time deep contemplation. He wasn’t just fighting a war, he was trying to mentally and emotionally will his way to victory. There was just something so human about how badly he wanted what he wanted because he thought it was right and made sense. Damn.

Quote:
Rob Stark: “I asked him, How can a man be brave if he’s afraid? That is the only time a man can be brave, he told me.”

2.) Tyrion Lannister


You just can’t leave him off this no matter which way you spin it. The Imp. The Half-man. The Dwarf. He is a half-pint of vice yet a barrel of ethical vigor. He uses sarcasm and condescension as a weapon to mask that deep down he is the only one among his family members who is kind, loving, and even tender and gentle. He likewise has an inner fury that he’ll aim at those who strike down upon the lowly, as he has been struck down on so much in his life. He also fucks a lot which is cool.

Quote:
Missandei: How do you know this?
Tyrion: That’s what I do. I drink, and I know things.

1.) Lord Tywin Lannister

BOMBSHELL. BSHHHHHHH. Ya I know. Me too. I texted Red this the other day and I’m sticking to it. Tywin is the best character on the show. He is the Vince McMahon of the realm. He leaves for a few scenes and then his music hits and you’re like ooo shit. Either with his army or his tongue he is going to carve someone the fuck in half. O and if he just doesn’t feel like he needs to use either he has a smirk or otherwise deadly facial expression to rip you to pieces with. He was a motherfucker, yes. An absolute piece of shit at times. He did it for his family in the end though. He never lost sight of his one rule. Kind of have to respect that.

Quote:
Tywin Lannister: “Any man who must say, ‘I am the king’ is no true king.”

So I hope you enjoyed that. Maybe you love or hate me for the picks. Either way we like to have fun around here. Enjoy Season 8. Winter is here.

-Joey B.