Category: News

I Am in a Race Against Time vs the Plastic Bag Ban in Boston

CBS News – A Boston city ordinance banning major grocery store chains from providing plastic bags to customers went into effect Friday. The new law – enacted to help reduce pollution and clean up city streets – applies only to checkout bags, described in the ordinance as carryout bags with handles. Retailers can still stock recyclable paper bags, compostable bags or reusable bags and sell them for at least 5 cents, as long as the charge is advertised near the checkout location, according to the ordinance, signed into law by Mayor Marty Walsh last December.

I bring my lunch to work every day in a repurposed Stop and Shop plastic bag because I’m a man of the people. I’m also not 5 so I don’t own a lunch box. However, today I had a very, very sobering realization. Finished making my lunch, got all the essentials, I reach under the sink and realized I am running *dangerously* low on plastic bags. Like we are at DEFCON 1. The Mrs. has already transitioned our grocery shopping over to the reusable satchels that Big Grocery has been trying to force down our throats for years so there are no new plastic bags coming into my household any more.

What is a man to do?

Do I cave and buy an Avengers lunchbox like a child? Do I just haul my Yeti cooler around like I’m heading to lay some concrete at the construction site?

I am a man at a crossroads in his life.

Come to think of it, I did buy one of the reusable grocery satchels years ago, but it’s a Super Mario one because I really am an overgrown manchild. Might be a bit aggressive for carrying my lunch around though…

Hot Takes on the 2019 Pro Football Hall of Fame Finalists

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On Thursday night, the Pro Football Hall of Fame’s Board of Selectors announced the list of the 15 modern-era finalists who are eligible for induction into the H.O.F. in 2019 – and HO-LEE HELL, it is absolutely freakin’ LOADED.

No, seriously, I have no idea how in the world they are only going to be able to select five guys from the list. (While no less than seven people have been inducted into the Hall each year since 2010, only five “modern-era” finalists can be selected for enshrinement each year. It should also be noted that while some of those announced last night are on the ballot for the first time, not all of them are; rather, this year’s finalists were chosen from an overall pool of 102 other eligible “modern-era” players.)

And the best part is that I actually remember watching pretty much all of these guys! For the past few years, I’ve found myself caring more and more about the Hall – and the dog and pony show that comes along with it – than I ever did as a kid. With former players like Marvin Harrison, Terrell Davis, Jason Taylor, Kurt Warner, Terrell Owens, LaDainian Tomlinson, Brian Dawkins, Brian Urlacher, and Randy Moss all getting in within the past three classes, I have never been more attuned to the yearly announcement than I am nowadays.

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Last year’s class was a solid group.

But this list??!! I couldn’t believe my eyes when I first saw it, and I have been agonizing all morning over which five of them I’d choose to make it in (ya know, if my opinion actually mattered at all in the grand scheme of things).

OK, OK, Mattes. We get it. So who’s on the list?

Here’s a full list of the 15 modern-era legends being talked about for next year’s class:

  • Steve Atwater
  • Champ Bailey
  • Tony Boselli
  • Isaac Bruce
  • Don Coryell
  • Alan Faneca
  • Tom Flores
  • Tony Gonzalez
  • Steve Hutchinson
  • Edgerrin James
  • Ty Law
  • John Lynch
  • Kevin Mawae
  • Ed Reed
  • Richard Seymour

That rundown reads like an early-2000s Madden dream team. And it even includes two former Patriots!

Save for Law, Seymour, Flores, and Reed, the group is actually pretty light in terms of Super Bowl hardware, but the amount of collective Pro Bowl appearances and All-Pro selections is ridiculous.

But alas, only five can be selected, so here are my picks for the 2019 Pro Football Hall of Fame Class:

(Tony Gonzalez)

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Tony G. was the easiest pick on the list for me. Some might be very quick to mention that it took him 16 years to finally get a playoff win, especially considering the fact he played on some pretty good teams in Kansas City and Atlanta throughout his career. OK. Fine. But there’s no doubting the fact that he is the most consistent and dependable tight end to ever play the game. In fact, he’s one of the most consistent and dependable pass-catchers to ever play the game, finishing second all-time in career receptions with 1,325! Only Jerry Rice has caught more balls in the history of the game, and the only other tight end who is even remotely close to Gonzalez’s total is Jason Witten – and he’s still almost 200 catches behind. Gonzalez is also eighth all-time with 111 receiving touchdowns. This is a guy who should get in purely on his numbers alone.

(Ed Reed)

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Throughout the first decade of the new millenium, there may have been no more dominant safety in the NFL than Ed Reed. (Although Troy Polamalu and Brian Dawkins, another Hall-of-Famer, might’ve given him a run for his money.) No, Reed wasn’t the biggest guy, or the hardest hitter. But his all-around ability gave opposing offensive coordinators fits, as there was very little you could do to fool him. He was always in the right spot at the right time, making tackles all over the field and ultimately finishing seventh on the all-time interceptions list with 64. Even Bill Belichick, who almost never gives praise to pretty much anyone, said this to Ed Reed back in 2009: “You’re the best free safety that has ever played this game that I’ve seen. You’re awesome.” Reed also helped the Ravens win a Super Bowl in 2013.

(Champ Bailey)

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Another guy who I’m selecting based more upon numbers as opposed to wins, Bailey defined the term “lockdown cornerback.” His 52 career interceptions are even more impressive when you consider the fact that most opposing quarterbacks usually did anything they could to avoid throwing the ball anywhere near him on the field. He was an All-Pro selection seven times in his career, including three in which he was on the First Team, and very few players in history have ever been able to completely nullify a team’s No. 1 receiver on such a consistent and prolonged basis. Bailey played in his first Super Bowl as a 35-year-old, injury-riddled backup in 2014, but his Broncos were annihilated by the Seahawks, 41-8. Still, this guy is one of the greatest cover men to ever play the game.

Here’s where it gets super tough, but I only have two more slots to fill. So, without further ado:

(Alan Faneca) 

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This one might not be the sexiest of picks, but I gotta show some love to the big fella. Faneca was a reliable and consistent force on the Steelers’ offensive line for 10 seasons and missed a total of only two games over that time. He not only helped Jerome Bettis stay relevant toward the end of his career, but he was also one of the people helping to protect a young Big Ben, with whom he won a Super Bowl in 2006. He was also a First-Team All-Pro six times (again, not just “All-Pro,” but “First-Team All-Pro”). (Side note: I always made sure to select Faneca as my top O-lineman in my Madden fantasy drafts. I’ve been a big fan of this dude for years.)

(Tom Flores)

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OK, so I wasn’t even a twinkle in my parents’ eyes during Flores’s time, but after reading a pretty awesome ESPN.com article on him today, I can’t ignore what I now know. Flores is eligible to be inducted into the Hall as a coach, even though he did spend some time as a player. And he was not just any player; he was the first professional Latino quarterback in history and finished as the fifth-leading passer in AFL history. (Again, this was before the NFL as we know it today was a thing.) He’s also won four combined Super Bowls in his career: one as a player, one as an assistant coach, and two as head coach of the Raiders in the 1980s. Again, I’m no expert on the guy, but after learning as much as I did about him recently, he’s a shoe-in.

We won’t know who ultimately makes it in until early February, but it’s always fun to speculate. (And I’m sorry to my guys Ty Law and Richard Seymour! But as the faithful 300s readers know, I’m no Patriots toadie! They’ll always be my No. 1 squad till I die, but I also keep it real, baby!)

We’d also love to know who you think should make it in and why. Be sure to let us know in the comments section or on Facebook!

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Iron Man 2

The300s MCU

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Let me start off by saying that Iron Man 2 is probably the worst film in the MCU. It bothers the living hell out of me, especially coming off of what I consider one of the best Marvel movies period, the first Iron Man. Ask most Marvel fans and they’ll probably rank this one near or at the bottom of their list which is totally valid. There are some incredible lows in this film, and i’ll do my best to break them down and sort them out for you.

Iron Man 2 is the 3rd installment of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, released on May 7th, 2010. By all means, this is the first true step in building towards The Avengers, as it features Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow, Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury, and Clark Gregg as Agent Coulson. To quickly summarize, Iron Man 2 starts off with Tony at the Stark Expo in Queens, NY. He’s showboating his Iron Man suit, as he often does, but it’s also revealed that he’s dying, poisoned by the very thing keeping him alive, his chest arc reactor. Watching on television somewhere in Russia, the sinister Ivan Vanko, played by Mickey Rourke, is working away on his own version of the arc reactor, based on plans crafted by his father and Tony’s dad, Howard. He ambushes Tony at the Monaco Grand Prix, debuting his alter ego Whiplash. This is met with curiosity from Tony’s rival arms dealer, Justin Hammer, played by Sam Rockwell. Hammer breaks Whiplash out of prison and hires him to build a fleet of Iron Man-like suits for him to win back his government arms contract. Vanko does build Hammer his suits, but is also secretly working on improving his Whiplash armor, very similar to the way Stark secretly built his Iron Man armor in captivity in the first installment of the franchise. The film culminates with a battle at the Stark expo, and with the help of Don Cheadle’s War Machine, Tony saves the day once again. Oh, and remember how Tony was dying? Yeah, he just magically creates a brand new element that has the power to save him. He’s really smart guys.

You’ll notice how I left out a lot of what happens in the middle of the movie. There’s a reason for that. It’s pure trash.

There’s so much happening in the second act of this movie that is painful to the eyes and ears.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huiZFHZwI_o

Let’s start with Rhodey becoming War Machine because Tony Stark was too drunk in his Iron Man suit. Riiiiiiiight. Just try and watch this nonsense with a straight face. Also, shout out to a cameo by DJ AM. RIP.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6Ds4_k3kiU

“I want my bird.” Vanko insists on Hammer getting him his bird, and he seems pretty damn serious about it. Yet, later in the movie he gets a random bird and….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beK0D9ChV40

….it immediately gets bagged in hilarious fashion! Also, what the hell is with Sam Rockwell in this movie? He is insanely bad and overacting the shit out of this thing. Mickey Rourke looks bored to death at every turn, and that’s saying something coming from an actor who was pretty much blacklisted from Hollywood for like a decade before this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWqhGlLqJEM

I only put this here because John Favreau stinks at acting. Decent director, stinky actor. Also, are we really not supposed to think ScarJo is Black Widow? Why even bother trying to hide it and play this game?

Finally, I’d like to shout out to Kate Mara for being in this thing for a total of 30 seconds.

I honestly could go on and on and nitpick this movie to death. Iron Man 3 stinks just as bad which is kind of crazy to think that for as much acclaim this series has, it only really has one good entry.

My final review: 3.0 out of 10. I’ve included the trailer just in case you wanted to test it out yourself. Godspeed.

Stay tuned for our next entry in The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind, Thor.

Secret Santa Gone Wrong

Thank you, office secret Santa, or as you should be called, 'disappointment roulette.' #FallonTonight http://t.co/azFxNRRQur

FOX News – According to an anonymous post on Reddit, a mother allegedly reached out to her Secret Santa gifter to both say thank you for the presents, and ask for another one…

“So…I know this is kinda awkward…but the spending limit was $50 and I looked online and it seems that the blanket and chocolates only add up to about $30?” the woman’s text reads.

“do you think it’s possible you could get me something else? My kids have been spending me up the wazoo! LOL.”

You can read the entire text message exchange here. From this exchange, it’s clear that this Secret Santa handled it better than most people would. The recipient had the gall to look up the prices of the presents and ask for more, and the Secret Santa actually offered throw her a twenty! That’s saintlike!

I wouldn’t even have responded to the first text, never mind the text where she asked for a Samsung Galaxy Tab. What planet in this galaxy is she from? This Secret Santa deserves a Nobel Peace Prize for how he handled this situation.

Stories like this are the reason why I don’t participate in office Secret Santas or Yankee Swaps. I made the mistake of participating in an office Secret Santa my first year in cubicle life. The spending limit was a much more appropriate $15, so I bought a craft beer six pack for my recipient and threw in a nice bottle opener to get up to about $15. My Secret Santa got me a few cans of Corona Light, a candy bar, and a shamrock koozie.

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I didn’t care about getting something back for about $15. I was disappointed by the shameless lack of effort. My gift clearly came out of the vegetable drawer of their refrigerator and their junk drawer. At 7:30 AM that morning. I decided to sit out the Yankee Swap the next year and watched as the boss nabbed the best gift early on and no one else had the guts to steal it from him.

When I get invites to Secret Santas or Yankee Swaps now, I just buy myself another Red Sox hat and call it a day.

The 300s Marvel Cinematic Rewind Presents: Iron Man

The300s MCU

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A little over 10 years ago I walked into the movie theater with some friends. I had just finished my freshman year of college and was home for a couple of months. That summer promised some insanely popular movies, namely the second installment of the Christopher Nolan Batman franchise, The Dark Knight. To say that Iron Man was anywhere on my radar would have been a complete lie. While I always considered myself a fan of comic book movies, I was never what you would consider a die-hard. You have to figure, this was 2008, way before we were able to see what the Marvel Cinematic Universe would become. Hell, just a year earlier we were given the much maligned Spider-Man 3. It was a different time back then. So when I sat down in my seat in the theater that day, I had no idea what was about to happen. I was about to enter a world that would engross me for the next decade.

In case you somehow forgot, Iron Man started it all. We were introduced to Tony Stark, a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist (his words, not mine) played by Robert Downey Jr., who at the time was coming off a rough battle with substance abuse. The casting of Downey Jr. was definitely a bit out of left field, especially to lead what Marvel Studios hoped would launch a franchise. Keep in mind though, this was before Disney acquired Marvel and the distribution was still handled by Paramount. Suffice it to say they absolutely nailed the casting. I mean, could you imagine anyone else in the role?

To sum it up quickly, Iron Man follows Stark to the Middle East where he is conducting weapons tests for his company, Stark Industries. While overseeing the development, he is kidnapped by terrorists and instructed to create a weapon for them. Using his genius and the materials provided, he constructs a crude version of the Iron Man suit and unleashes holy hell on the terrorists. He escapes and returns home, set on changing how his company operates and with a passion to do good in the world. Naturally, shit hits the fan when his business partner, Obadiah Stane, catches wind of Starks’ plan to exit the arms dealing industry and learns of his Iron Man persona. Stane becomes Iron Monger with the help of Tony’s old suit, they battle, and naturally Tony wins and saves the day. After the credits, Nick Fury shows up to plant the seed of the Avengers initiative, and the rest is history.

I remember when I first saw the post-credits scene, I had no idea what Marvel’s plans were. In fact, I don’t think I had ever seen a post-credits scene before this point. Marvel then obviously perfected it, always leaving us hanging for the next installment. Where else do you see an entire audience stay in their seats through all the credits just to see a clip that will inevitably wind up on youtube the next day? It was revolutionary and changed the game.

So what did I like?

Robert Downey Jr. 

I became an instant fan when I saw this movie. He was hilarious and believable in the part. The guy obviously had a great number of films before this and it encouraged me to go back and watch movies like Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Zodiac (I also completely forgot he was in the underrated gem, Bowfinger).

Terrence Howard

Talk about shitty luck, huh? Howard played the original Colonel James “Rhodey” Rhodes (aka War Machine) who was later replaced with actor Don Cheadle. It’s not clear why he didn’t return, but it had something to do with a contract dispute. I thought Howard and Downey Jr. played well off of each other and was looking forward to seeing him in the sequels. No disrespect to the Cheadle.

The Plot

I really loved how self-contained the story was. At the time I guess it wasn’t really that important, but now that we live in a world where there are already three Avengers films out with a fourth on the way, it’s nice to look back at a time when the only hero in town was Iron Man. Now any time a Marvel movie comes out and it’s a stand alone film, I always wonder where the hell everyone else is and why they can’t help out.

19 more MCU films have been released since 2008, yet unsurprisingly, Iron Man still remains one of my favorite Marvel films. It’s been cool to see the evolution of the character over the past decade and I am just praying to god he doesn’t meet his demise in Avengers: Endgame.

Final Verdict: 9.0 out of 10

On that note, I leave you with this gem. RIP Obadiah.

Alex Reimer Sets Record Straight on WEEI’s Red Sox Radio Broadcast Changes

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So it seems like The Boston Globe may have jumped the gun a bit earlier this week when they reported that WEEI planned to change their Red Sox radio broadcast format to more of a talk-show type of deal.

They left it pretty open as to exactly what the hell that even meant, but they seemed pretty damn confident in reporting that it was a real thing that was happening.

After the report was then refuted by WEEI’s Program Director Joe Zarbano, Chad Finn – whom initially reported the “story” – then doubled-down and referred to the email which alerted him to the official job posting for the open Sox play-by-play announcer position. At the same time, Zarbano has held firm in his response:

So, as of Thursday morning, all we had to go off of were a series of “he said/she said” tweets, which meant that either somebody got a lead on something they shouldn’t have, or they were entirely duped by a completely misleading email.

I’m now more inclined to believe it was the latter.

The official job posting from the Sportcasters Talent Agency of America makes ZERO mention of a “talk show format” in any way, BUT Finn did release the text of the industry-wide email promoting the posting, which said the following:

There is an opening on the Boston Red Sox radio play-by-play team following Tim Neverett’s decision not to renew his contract.

The Boston Globe has reported about plans for major changes to this broadcast format. STAA knows these plans to be true. WEEI wants to drop the concept of a conventional radio baseball broadcast to make the call of the game sound more like a talk show.

WEEI [program director] Joe Zarbano is eager to receive applications. However, he tells STAA he doesn’t want to be bombarded with email attachments.

So, to be fair, I totally get where Finn was coming from, but like Zarbano said, maybe, I don’t know, he should’ve checked in with the actual radio station first?

WEEI’s Alex Reimer then wrote an article early Thursday afternoon, and he said that the misleading information from the STAA email most likely comes from the fact that the station is thinking about adding one more person to the booth in an effort to create more chatter (and apparently rumors about this have been out there for a while). They want it to have a more conversational tone, which allows for more colorful analysis and insight, and above all it should help to add more excitement to what can at times be a very dull platform.

The three-person broadcast team has gained a lot of popularity, across multiple sports, in recent years, and it’s been met with great success. I’m totally on board with this.

So thanks to Reimer for clearing up that weird early-morning B.S. from yesterday, and here’s to hoping WEEI is able to find a solid trio who can get it done and finally bring the archaic station into the future.

Dutch Man Asks to Legally Change His Age; Court Says No, but He Doesn’t Care

'I can choose my own life and my own holiday and my own name and my own gender, so why can't I choose my own age?'  Emile Ratelband told CNN.

(CNN) — Age cannot wither him — whatever a courtroom might rule.

Dutchman Emile Ratelband insists his quest to turn the clock forward on his birth certificate is not over, despite a judge on Monday dismissing his request to legally become a younger man.

The 69-year-old father-of-seven had applied to legally have two decades shaved off his age, comparing his request with those from people seeking to switch their gender.

The bizarre exercise was motivated by Ratelband’s desire to make himself more attractive to members of the opposite sex on Tinder and other dating apps. Being younger would also boost his job prospects, he argued.

Nevertheless Ratelband sounded anything but deflated following the ruling. “We plan to appeal right away,” the self-defined positivity guru told CNN.

We here at The 300s typically try to keep things tied to sports, music, movies, and other forms of entertainment as much as possible. We know you’re here for fun, cheeky banter and unique takes on those subjects which hopefully help get you through the humdrum work week.

But sometimes there are stories – ones that step outside the normal realm – that we can’t let slip by. Get a load of this complete joke of a human being.

This guy wants to say he’s 20 years younger than he actually is, simply because he wants to get laid (and “get a better job” *wink wink*), and he is comparing his “plight” to that of others who struggle with real identity crises and the discrimination they face each and every day.

GOT IT.

I have never rooted so hard for somebody to lose a case in my entire life, and I hope that this little plan of his backfires so hard that nobody wants to hire him ever again, not due to his age but simply due to the fact he’s an absolute clown.

Look, I’m all for someone shooting their shot. Seriously, that’s my life’s motto: “shoot your shot.” Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

But this is just insanity, and it’s stuff like this which delegitimizes other people’s valid claims of mistreatment, many of which now often go ignored due to the overwhelming stream of garbage self-pity campaigns and people’s incessant desire to be the center of attention.

And how about the audacity of this D-bag???!!! Check out this quote he gave just the other day: “My older son is 42 and he says ‘when you become 49 you will be more like a big brother than a father to me.’ But I say that’s OK as most people think I’m your big brother and not your father anyway.

The part that scares me the most is not the fact that people now have the gall to actually bring forth cases like this; the scariest part is the fact that he is going to appeal, and I would not be surprised in the slightest if he somehow won.

There’s no question that we live in an increasingly progressive society, which more often than not is a very, very good thing that has helped bring a lot of positive change to the world. But it’s also opened the door for everyone and their brother to complain about everything and make issues out of non-legitimate B.S. that does not matter one iota to the world at large.

They’re even going after freakin’ Rudolph now!!!

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In recent years: same-sex couples won the right marry across the country; people aren’t being thrown away for life anymore for smoking a joint; trans individuals won the right to keep the rights they worked so hard for in Massachusetts – all awesome things!

But some of this other stuff has to stop, and if Ratelband wins his appeal I will take the first Virgin Galactic tourist flight to outer space – which allegedly could happen by the end of this year – and just fucking stay there.

Stay strong, European court system. For everyone’s sake.

One of Patriots All-Time Unsung Heroes Gets 8 Years in Prison

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It’s really been an AWFUL year for the once vaunted “Legion of Boom.”

Once perhaps the most fearsome quartet in the entire NFL, former Seahawks defensive secondary mates Richard Sherman, Kam Chancellor, Earl Thomas, and Brandon Browner probably can’t wait for 2018 to finally be over in a just a few weeks.

Sherman had an ugly breakup with the team last offseason and is stuck in San Francisco. Chancellor suffered a severe neck injury at the end of 2017 and, while still technically on the Seahawks roster, looks like he might be forced to hang ’em up for good. Thomas – after a very public contract dispute and self-promotion campaign – sustained a gruesome leg injury against the Cardinals this past September, effectively ending his season and, most likely, also his career in Seattle.

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This will likely forever be known as Thomas’s swan song in a Seattle uniform.

But nobody’s having a worse time than Brandon Browner right now, as the 34-year-old, two-time Super Bowl champion was sentenced to eight years in prison today after committing a ridiculous string of crimes – including FOUR felonies – over the past year alone.

Rather than regale you with the details of Browner’s abhorrent spree – which includes everything from making threats to drug possession to burglary and, finally, to both attempted kidnapping AND attempted murder – the guy has gone completely off the rails. It’s a really sad story, but I guess it’s not so surprising coming from a guy who wasn’t very well-liked outside of his own locker room and who also set the NFL record for penalties in a single season in 2015.

What’s really sad about all of it, though, is the fact that Browner should truly be considered one of the most important players in Patriots history, but his memory will now be forever grossly tainted.

I’m dead serious. Hear me out.

There’s a huge difference between being one of the “greatest” and one of the “most important,” and Browner is certainly one of the latter. While everyone gives Malcolm Butler all the credit for picking off Russell Wilson to end Super Bowl XLIX, giving the Pats their fourth championship, it probably doesn’t happen without Browner.

Watch No. 39 in the bottom right corner of the screen for the duration of the play before Butler makes the interception:

Did you see what he did there? He sets an absolutely PERFECT pick on Seahawks then-No. 1 wide receiver Jermaine Kearse, allowing Butler to sneak around the block and cut off what would have been a perfect, wide-open throwing lane for Wilson, which would have resulted in a cupcake touchdown for Seattle and a heartbreaking defeat for the Pats.

Yes, Butler still needs to catch the ball. And no, I’m not saying Browner deserves all the shine – after all, Butler was the one had to actually haul it in. I am saying, though, that if Browner isn’t there on that play, Tom Brady still only has four rings to his name. No doubt in my mind.

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It’s hard to find much out there about Browner’s vital involvement on the play, but at least Pro Football Talk’s Mike Florio agrees with me: (link to Florio’s take). Browner’s strong play all year was also a huge part of the reason the Pats were even there in the first place.

But look, I’m not trying to sit here and wax poetic about a guy who absolutely deserves to be put away for a long time after everything he’s done. I’m just saying that it’s obvious this man has always had some issues up top, and it’s sad he never received the help he so desperately needed.

Maybe his antics throughout his entire career – and the almost unbelievable crimes he’s committed recently – were truly a cry for help, or at least a neon-bright sign for an unstable individual. Or maybe he’s really just a P.O.S. and I’m an asshole for saying anything nice about him. Regardless, here’s to hoping eight years in the pen allows Browner to finally find his peace – for both he and everyone else around him’s sake.

TWO NEW MARVEL TRAILERS DROPPING THIS WEEK – including Avengers 4!

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Marvel nerds like yours truly are in for a real treat this week, as it was announced we’ll get TWO brand-new trailers over the next couple of days – starting with the second teaser for Captain Marvel on Monday night!

Back in September, we brought you the first CM trailer and there was a lot to like from the brief footage we got. For a story and character who does not have much of a mainstream following at all, we’ll hopefully get a better glimpse into Carol Danvers’ background and how it connects to the MCU overall. We already know she’s a force to be reckoned with and that Nick Fury has a lot to do with her story, but that’s about it right now. I need more, Marvel! Especially considering I still have to wait a little over three months to see it.

As mentioned in the tweet above, the second Captain Marvel trailer is set to drop tonight on Monday Night Football.

But even more exciting is the news that we are also going to get what we’ve all been waiting for: the first look at the still untitled Avengers 4 film! The first-ever teaser trailer – or promotional material of any kind so far, really – for the much anticipated finale to last year’s Avengers: Infinity War is expected to be released on Wednesday morning, with many speculating it will air on ABC’s Good Morning America.

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Yes, FINALLY! I know! Took ’em long enough!

BUT, do be sure to temper your expectations a bit. We’re not going to find out what happened to our beloved heroes that turned to dust at the end of the last film (I’m not even gonna say SPOILER ALERT here, because…come on, seriously?). We’re also probably not going to find out wherever the hell Thanos was at the end of the movie (even though some tried and true Marvel fans out there think it might be a place called “Soulworld,” which I will fully admit I am certainly no expert on.)

Maybe, however, we will get some intimations about some of the other burning questions we all had after leaving the theater last summer. Is Gamora alive? Does Hawkeye decide to make one more comeback? What actually happened to Vision? And, last but not least, will Bruce finally get his shit together and learn how to control himself (and the Giant Green Guy) once again?

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What the hell’s going on with you, doc?

I guess we’re about to find out, and there’s always a chance we could get a quick 30-second cut of B.S. But either way, I’m super amped and just wanted to make sure all my fellow Marvel heads have their eyes peeled this week. Happy Monday indeed!

Lets Have a Good Cry with George H.W. Bush’s Service Dog, Sully

Jesus christ I was not prepared for this. I don’t know what’s sadder; a dog passing away or a dog’s owner passing away. Ya know what, I don’t even want to have this mental conversation with myself right now. I’m a little fried from sitting in the rain all day yesterday at Gillette, so just do what I did and go have yourself a good cry in the office bathroom.