Tag: NFL

Jared Goff Audibles into Romance With Next Level Peacocking

By on • ( Leave a comment )

Goff using @halleberry as an audible in the #Seahawks #Rams game is incredible 😂

(SOUND ON)pic.twitter.com/IPo5I7Qf65

Everybody knows the famous audible calls like Peyton Mannings “Omaha,” which got old around the time it started. Rams coach Sean McVay actually has a well known flair for absurd audible names.

Big Ben busted out the Dilly Dilly call before Bud Light dumped a billion dollars into creating an entire mythological universe around the catchphrase.

DILLY DILLY! Phenomenal audible from Big Ben and the #Steelers #NFL #TNF #ThursdayNightFootball #Titans #TENvsPIT #ColorRush pic.twitter.com/Pt3ywAUfaa

— The 300s (@The300sBoston) November 17, 2017

And then there was the completely out of left field reference to milk products in the Patriots Texans game in September.

“Cold Dairy” may be the weirdest audible I’ve ever heard. #Patriots #Texans #HOUvsNE

🥛 🥛 🥛 🥛 🥛 🥛

— The 300s (@The300sBoston) September 9, 2018

But for Jared Goff to shoot his shot while playing on national TV for the Los Angeles Rams, just a stone’s throw away from Hollywood, is next level peacocking. The Pickup Artist himself would be proud.

AND IT WORKED! Halle Berry is smitten already

 

Hold up. @JaredGoff16 @RamsNFL – What is a “Halle Berry”?? 🤔😂 https://t.co/nQyaWHQRrn

— Halle Berry (@halleberry) November 11, 2018

Jared Goff played it cooler than the other side of the pillow too.

It’s my favorite play ever https://t.co/YLWi7c3DNE

— Jared Goff (@JaredGoff16) November 12, 2018

This guy might not know which way the sun rises and sets, but goddamnit he knows what women want.

Patriots Titans Week 10 Game Preview, Odds, and Things to Watch For

By on • ( Leave a comment )

Image result for malcolm butler press conference

After last week’s win over the Packers, I think it’s safe to say the team is on a bit of a roll.

This week’s matchup with the Titans also marks the first of only three non-divisional games remaining on the schedule for the Pats this season. The other four consist of matchups against the Bills at home, the Dolphins in Miami, and the Jets TWICE.

Locking up to a top-two seed in the AFC looks like a foregone conclusion at this point, but this week’s opponent, the Tennessee Titans, definitely aren’t a pushover and shouldn’t be taken lightly, especially coming off a nice win in Dallas on Monday night.

As always, here’s a quick look at where, when, and how to watch the game along with the latest lines:

  • Location: Nissan Stadium (Nashville, TN)
  • Kickoff: Sunday, Nov. 11, 1 p.m. ET
  • TV: CBS
  • Odds (via Odds Shark): Patriots: -6.5 (spread) / Patriots: -270 (moneyline) / 46.5 (total)

It’s actually been tough to gauge exactly who the Titans are this season. Not only is their record dead even at 4-4, but they’ve also been quite streaky: lost to Miami in the season-opener; three-straight wins; three-straight losses; bye week; and, most recently, a 14-point win against the Cowboys.

After a rough, injury-plagued start to the season, Titans fourth-year quarterback Marcus Mariota has really started hit his stride the past two games. He looked dialed in on Monday night, completing 72 percent of his passes and posting two scores against a very good Dallas defense. His 272 total yards may not jump off the page, but 32 of those came on the ground, proving once again that he can get it done with both his arms and his legs.

Image result for marcus mariota

Mariota first made a name for himself as an exciting dual-threat stud at Oregon before being drafted No. 2 overall by the Titans in the 2015 NFL Draft. After two solid seasons to start off his NFL career – including a 3,775-total-yard, 26-TD season in Year 2 – Mariota regressed significantly in his third year last season. Even though the Titans made the playoffs in 2017, Mariota’s QB rating plummeted from 95.6 to 79.3, and he threw more picks than touchdowns.

Most people forget, though, that he was still trying to recover from a broken leg, which he suffered in December 2016; for a guy who’s used to relying on his wheels to hit peak performance, it makes sense that he hit a bit of a rough patch last year. But again, outside of some pretty horrid early-season performances this year, Mariota looks like he’s finally getting back on track. And after seeing Bears quarterback Mitch Trubisky run all over the Pats two weeks ago, Mariota can do some damage against this defense if he hits the second level.

Old friend Dion Lewis has also been playing much better for the Titans as of late. After signing with Tennessee this offseason – fresh off an 1,110-yard season with the Pats – he averaged just 3.4 yards per touch through the first six games of 2018. Then he exploded for 155 yards against the Chargers in London two weeks ago, followed up by a 122-yard performance this past Monday night. Derrick Henry was supposed to form a nice 1-2 punch with Lewis in the Titans’ backfield this season, but he has been a complete bust. This is Dion Lewis’s show.

Image result for dion lewis

Still, as well as those two have played the past two weeks, the Titans offense stinks. At the moment, their offense ranks only ahead of the Bills and Cardinals, and they’ve yet to break 30 points on the year. Even worse, they’ve failed to score at least 14 points three times this season. While Corey Davis has all-world-level talent as a receiver, he hasn’t been able to put it all together and have the type of impact the Titans were expecting from their former top-10 pick. There really just isn’t a lot to talk about in terms of the Titans passing attack.

On the flip side, Tennessee’s defense is elite. They are currently ranked fifth overall, and they are No. 1 in terms of points per game, allowing just 17.6 per contest on the year. They are especially stout against the run, as pointed out by FantasyPro’s Mike Tagliere in his primer this week:

They’ve allowed a mediocre 4.03 yards per carry, but have allowed just two rushing touchdowns and no receiving touchdowns to running backs…There hasn’t been a running back who’s totaled more than 85 rushing yards against them and there hasn’t been a running back who’s totaled more than 51 yards through the air against them.

Therefore, both James White and Sony Michel, if he comes back this week, will have their work cut out for them on Sunday. Even after scoring 30-plus points in five of their last six contests, expect the Pats offense to cool down a bit in the Volunteer State. (Although there is one particular guy – with whom you should all be quite familiar – that has been a gigantic piece of swiss cheese for the Titans this season. More on him in a second.)

Storylines

(Belichick to Face One of His All-Time Greats): As we often see at least one or twice a year, Belichick will be squaring off against one of his former protégés on the other sideline. This time around, though, it’s a bit different, as former Patriots standout linebacker Mike Vrabel is now the man running the show in Tennessee. Vrabel is one of my all-time favorite Pats players. He was a key piece of each of the first three Super Bowl-winning teams, spending eight memorable seasons in a Pats uniform. He was always such a commanding presence and helped keep the rest of the team in line, so it’s no surprise he’s shot up the coaching ranks so quickly. It’s always fun to watch the student try and take on the master – usually, though, a part of me doesn’t want to actually root for the student.

Image result for mike vrabel

Kudos to you, Mikey. You deserve everything you’ve got so far.

(Both Teams are Quite Well-Behaved): While their effectiveness and talent-level are eons apart, the Pats and Titans offenses are the two least penalized in the league. In fact, the Titans are the only team in the league that has yet to commit at least 40 penalties on the season. This shouldn’t be all that surprising considering the coaches running both squads, but it’s tough to get either side to beat themselves.

(Malcolm Butler Has Been a Complete Sieve): Look, I’m still not over him sitting out the entire Super Bowl against the Eagles – seriously, there will NEVER be a reason good enough – but there’s no denying that Malcolm Butler has been downright awful this season. Per Rotoworld’s Rich Hribar, Butler has given up over 600 receiving yards and seven scores in coverage this season, which are both a league high. I’ll always appreciate what you did for us, Malcom, but oh how the mighty have fallen. Maybe the “revenge game” narrative will give him a spark this week, or maybe he really has just become that bad.

Image result for malcolm butler titans

It’s been a rough year for Malcolm so far in Tennessee.

(Will We Get Sony Back?): Even after Cordarrelle Patterson’s solid running performance on Sunday night, the Pats need Sony Michel back to bolster the team’s backfield. While I would rather he just sit out through next week’s bye, he’s apparently expected to play on Sunday, per Schefty:

Stay tuned.

Prediction

Even though the Titans have been solid on defense, I think the Pats end up scoring a bit more than people expect this week. Bill is going to pick on Malcolm Butler at any chance he gets, to the point where he and Josh will scheme it just so Brady has to go right at him. They did the very same against Logan Ryan – another current Tennessee corner and former Patriot – in the playoffs last year, and Bill’s just petty enough to do it again. Mariota benefits from a little home-cooking and does OK, but still only manages one score through the air. Dion gets a little revenge as well, but in the end the Pats pull it out 24-17.

Patriots Packers Postgame Reaction and Quick Hits

By on • ( Leave a comment )

Image result for packers patriots

In what was supposed to be an epic battle between two of the best signal-callers to ever grace the field, both Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers were about as average as it comes in the Pats’ 31-17 win over the Packers on Sunday night.

Much of this had to do with stellar defensive play on both sides, as both quarterbacks failed to crack 300 passing yards. In fact, were it not for two big catches on consecutive plays at the end of the third quarter by Packers rookie Marquez Valdes-Scantling, totaling 50 yards, Rodgers would have barely topped 200 yards. The Packers also held Brady to just over 220 yards and no scores heading into the fourth quarter.

Basically, if you took the over and were expecting offensive firepower all night, you were severely disappointed.

I will also humbly eat a gigantic piece of crow pie this week, as I was a bit too quick to write off Cordarrelle Patterson as a runner in last week’s game notes. While I do stand by the fact he looked terrible outside of one play in Buffalo, the 27-year-old athletic specimen looked fantastic toting the rock last night, rumbling his way to 61 yards on 11 carries – which included muscling his way into the endzone on a five-yard goal-line score in the second quarter.

(To be fair, two games is still a pretty small sample size from which to draw any conclusions. But all I’m saying is that Patterson looked great last night. Good for you, bud.)

Here are a few other takeaways from last night’s solid win:

  • Trey Flowers, man. He finished third on the team in tackles and had a half-sack to boot. But, again, it’s what he does outside the stat sheet that truly counts, as his motor doesn’t stop all game long. The play that stood out to me was a 2nd-and-5 attempt for the Packers with about 1:50 to go in the first quarter, where Flowers absolutely plows through his first blocker and quickly sheds the next two guys on a DOUBLE-block to get in Rodgers’s face, forcing an incomplete pass and a third down. The guy continues to be an absolute force, especially these past couple of weeks. There’s just not much else to say.
  • Kyle Van Noy had another nice night as well, particularly as a run-stopper, finishing with nine solid tackles.
Image result for kyle van noy

The guy still can’t cover worth a lick, but he does do everything else pretty well and has been one of the D’s top performers this year.

  • Even with Shaq Mason being out this week, Brady was only sacked twice and hit just one other time. Much of this, however, might have to do with the fact that Brady has been blitzed at the lowest rate in the league this season, as pointed out during the broadcast last night by Cris Collinsworth. Not to take anything away from the offensive line, but apparently teams haven’t really been gunning too hard to get after him – which does, in fact, make a lot of sense considering the Pats’ dink-and-dunk approach which doesn’t call for Brady to hold on to the ball for much more than a second or two. Either way, it’s a good thing. I just thought it was interesting.
  • As if he needed yet another feather in his cap, Brady also became the first player ever to surpass 80,000 total yards in his career (including the postseason). The previous record-holder was Peyton Manning, with 79,978, but Brady took the top spot on the team’s go-ahead drive in the fourth quarter last night.

Image result for tom brady greatest

  • I couldn’t believe my eyes, but Dwayne Allen actually had a catch last night! He was able to muster up a whole 21 yards on ONE whole target across 66 snaps, all while collecting even more of his totally reasonable $4 MILLION SALARY this year. (Catching the sarcasm at all there?)
  • Julian Edelman and Josh Gordon are the best pair of receivers Brady’s had in YEARS. They both dominated last night.

So, while the offense was definitely slowed a bit by a well-performing Green Bay defense, Brady & Co. were able to do just enough to grab a respectable win. Just over halfway through the season, the team is now five games over .500, and besides two respective matchups with the Vikings and Steelers, the Pats only have the Titans, Jets, Bills, and Dolphins left to worry about. (No really, though! That’s it!)

Be sure to check back in with The 300s this Thursday for our preview of Sunday’s matchup with the Titans down in Nashville.

The 300s Reviews: Buffalo Bills New Era Field

By on • ( Leave a comment )

I took my life in my hands and went up to Buffalo to check out this phenomenon they call Bills Mafia. So I’m at the Bills game a couple weeks back and holy hell it was like watching football in the 1950s. The Bills ran the ball FOURTY THREE times including four QB scrambles and only completed 10 passes in a 13-12 win over the Titans. Labatt Blues for everyone! Without further ado, The 300s Reviews: New Era Field….

Quick Pats Bills Game Notes/Pats Packers Week 9 Preview

By on • ( Leave a comment )

Image result for brady rodgers

Remember when the Dolphins were tied with us for first in the AFC East? LOL.

Balance has now been restored in the universe, as the Pats are once again completely in the driver’s seat in the AFC East for the 4,568th year in a row. After Monday night’s 25-6 victory over the Bills, the Pats now lead in the division by two games and soon more.

Ya boy Mattes was in NYC for the past couple of days – and I cannot even TELL you just how good it felt to be rockin’ a Sox hat around that city this week – so I was unable to get up my review of the game on Tuesday. Therefore, before getting into Sunday night’s tilt with the Packers, here are a few quick things of note from the other night in Orchard Park:

  • Even though Derek Anderson is a statue in the pocket, the pass-rush looked excellent. Trey Flowers is an absolute monster, and I will personally pay whatever I have to in order to keep him around (he’s a free agent after this season). He may not have had any sacks, but there was one first quarter sequence where Flowers completely blew up one of the Bills’ cute, little Wildcat plays (what is this? 2008?), and then on the very next play he did his best Vince Carter impression, jumping sky-high in the air to block an Anderson pass attempt. He was just everywhere on Monday night and is the unquestioned heart and soul of the defense. Adrian Clayborn, Malcolm Brown, and Kyle Van Noy, who had two sacks on the night, were also noticeably active up front as well.
Image result for trey flowers

Bill, please pay this man!

  • Although Van Noy was great on Monday night, he is a complete one-trick pony: excellent pass-rusher but absolutely USELESS in coverage. Seriously, he couldn’t cover a guy using a walker. Once again the Pats were able to stop the run but were completely carved up by the receiving game out of the backfield (LeSean McCoy had six catches for 82 yards while totaling just 13 yards on 12 carries). There were rumors this week that the Pats were looking at bringing back old friend Jamie Collins, which shows that even the team knows how soft we are in terms of pass-coverage over the middle. Seriously, it’s bad.
  • We desperately need Sony Michel back. Were it not for Devin McCourty’s key pick-six in the fourth quarter, the game would’ve been a helluva lot closer than it was. Much of that had to do with the fact that the running game was absolutely non-existent. And no, Cordarrelle Patterson absolutely did not look good out there; outside of one big 22-yard run, Patterson had 16 yards on nine carries. Sure, he is a physical specimen, but truthfully for most of the night he looked like a big buck trying to find its way out of a small barn. Nice try, Bill, but please don’t ever try that little experiment ever again.
  • Jason McCourty was solid once more, and he and Patrick Chung really helped to overcompensate for the guys in front of them all game.
Image result for jason mccourty patriots

After a rough summer, J-Mac is certainly proving his worth this season.

  • Just like I said, now that Julian Edelman is back and Josh Gordon is in the fold, things have opened up once again for Chris Hogan. He simply cannot be a No. 1 or 2 option, but he is still an above-average third or fourth option for Brady, and some may be surprised to hear that he actually has 190 total receiving yards over the past three games.

On to the Pats/Packers preview, which will be a bit more brief than past primers. As always, here’s a quick look at where, when, and how to watch the game along with the latest lines:

  • Location: Gillette Stadium (Foxborough, MA)
  • Kickoff: Sunday, Nov. 4, 8:30 p.m. ET
  • TV: NBC
  • Odds (via Odds Shark): Patriots: -5.5 (spread)/Patriots: -235 (moneyline)/56.5 (total)

This is a game that has the NFL licking its chops: Tom Brady vs. Aaron Rodgers in a Sunday night primetime matchup. Is that a pylon in your pants Mr. Goodell, or are you just happy to see me?

Image result for roger goodell smile

But all joking aside, this is truly a treat. It is absolutely criminal that the two greatest quarterbacks, possibly ever but definitely in the game right now, will be squaring off for just the SECOND time ever – the last one being a 26-21 Packers victory all the way back in 2014! That is just shameful.

The debate over who is truly better will rage on in NFL circles forever. Rodgers may not have all the stats and accolades Brady’s compiled throughout his career, but he’s also seven years younger. He’s also touting a pristine 13-to-1 TD-to-INT ratio this season compared to Brady’s 16-to-7 mark, and there’s a great argument to be made that he may have had less talent around him – especially on defense – throughout his entire career. But for now, even Rodgers himself ended the debate on Tuesday, per ESPN:

“I let you guys worry about those types of conversations,” Rodgers said of any debate about which player is better. “I think that’s end-of-career conversations. … I’m just worried about winning right now. He’s got five championships, so that ends most discussions, I think.”

But enough about those two. I think even the most casual fan understands that they’re both pretty good at football.

As far as Rodgers’s receiving options go, other than No. 1 receiver Davante Adams it’s a complete crapshoot each week regarding who the other top pass-catchers will be, much to the chagrin of fantasy owners everywhere. Adams is one of the game’s very best receivers – currently fifth in the league in receiving yards per game (98.5) – and will likely match up with Stephon Gilmore. But after that it’s between the oft-injured but resilient Randall Cobb or younger guys like Geronimo Allison and Marquez Valdes-Scantling. And don’t forget about Jimmy Graham, no longer one of the game’s elite tight ends but still a decent player nonetheless.

Aaron Jones and his 6.2 yards per carry will most likely lead the way in the backfield, especially after this week’s trade of Ty Montgomery, with Jamaal Williams serving as a more-than-capable No. 2 guy. This used to be a three-headed approach, but Jones’s 86-yard and one-score performance on just 14 touches Sunday presumably solidified his spot as the top dog.

Image result for aaron jones

Go get this guy on your fantasy squad immediately.

As pointed out by Joey Ballgame earlier today, the Packers feature a top-10 defense and are fifth-best against the pass (even though they did trade away star safety HaHa Clinton-Dix to Washington this week, which is certainly not insignificant). They are beatable on the ground, though, coming in at No. 22, so hopefully Sony’s back this week in what should be a great matchup for him.

Prediction

This one’s tough to gauge, as it could really be anybody’s game. Both teams feature solid, multi-pronged offensive attacks, with the Packers gaining a significant edge on defense. I feel like it’ll be a beautiful boxing match between two heavyweights that goes the full 12 rounds. In the end, though, youth wins out and the Pats fall at home 28-24.

This Green Bay Game Is Stressing Me Out and We Still Have No Clue What This Pats Team Is

By on • ( Leave a comment )

This, dear children, is the life of a Pats fan. This is what we signed up for. The crushing duality of being both the hunted and the hunter at all times, week in and week out. Most teams, and fan bases, would be pleased sitting at 6-2, first in their division, with a hard but manageable path to a playoff berth. Maybe even a playoff win, huh? Not us, and not our Patriots. Certainly not the High Triumvirate of Brady-Kraft-Belichick. No, we aspire to play in championship games and win championships. Therefore, a Week 9 game against an NFC team becomes a big, stressful to-do.

Green Bay represents a stiff challenge from a name-brand NFL foe and long-time power, and that is why this game is both important and stressful. They have an all-time great under center in Aaron Rodgers, who is smart, has a cannon of an arm, and a sometimes overwhelming ability to extend a play with his legs. The Packers also, if you have not been paying attention, have the 7th ranked D in the NFL in terms of total yards allowed. This can be a deceiving stat but still, it shows they are no slouch on that side of the ball either. So even if the Packers currently sit at a medicore 3-3-1, the Pats have to march onto the field to play a strong team with strong pieces, and a number of questions to answer in their own locker room. It’s not as much of a true test of who we are as it is a pop quiz.

To start with the offense, just who the fuck does Brady really trust throwing the ball to? His persistent praise and backing of Josh Gordon shows that he indeed desires to have a true #1 receiver, a la Cooks and Moss, in his arsenal. “Do not let this fearless freak of nature go,” thinks Tom between spoonfuls of avocado ice cream while Alex G. rubs his feet…sorry got off track. Other than Gordon, we have a still studly Edelman and RB/pass catching savage James White. Then things get interesting. Apart from those three, both in terms of production and where they sit in the Brady Trust Tree, we have a MAX 1/2 healthy Gronk, a timid Chris Hogan, and Philip Dorsett, whose rise and fall in the pecking order this year makes me wonder if he asked Giselle to sign a copy of the Swimsuit issue for him. So what is the answer here? Going up against some of the better defenses in the league down the stretch and in the playoffs Brady and Josh McDaniels CANNOT only have Edelman, a still working out the kinks Gordon, and James White to count on in the passing game. Just can’t have it. The running game I’m less worried about. Obviously Michel needs to be healthy as the team was shaky at best on the ground without him, but I think if he gets patched up and we get Barner and White cooking out of the backfield-wise, the latter depending on if we can dial 28 back in the passing game, we should be cool.

Our D is also a fucking mystery. I’ve seen quite a few folks get down on our pass rush/front 4, but check this out:

 

I’ve touched on this in a grab bag but this is something that grinds my gears with Pats critics, especially when it comes to our pass rushers. We’ve had 10+ sack guys like Chandler Jones and Mike Vrabel, we’ve had low-numbers guys who just get pressure. Currently, we’re working with the latter. Maybe our guys are not filling up the stat sheet, but we are putting QBs under pressure, forcing decisions, and capitalizing off mistakes, whether that be turnovers or regaining possession of the ball off punts. So lay off my bezerkers please.

The middle of that line has been up and down. I’ve been a Malcolm Brown stan since day 1 but him, Shelton, and Adam Butler have been Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. Clean it up guys.

I don’t think the back half gets enough credit for being solid, albet not spectacular. They don’t seem to be asked to play traditional smash mouth, stop them at all costs defense, rather the “bend and not break and make them take 3 points” style we’ve grown accustom to. It just has become a lot more visible in this air it out age of football. Elandon Roberts continues to show he was a great snag, Hightower is Hightower, Van Noy is officially an animal, McCourty and Gilmore are studly in the secondary, and guys like Jason McCourty, Jonathan Jones, and, most recently, John Simon, have had their moments of solid play, although with ones of suckiness to go with it.

To summarize the D, who is next to step up? While our offense seems to be a trust and comfort issue, on D we just need someone to volunteer and say “I got this”. The last guy to do it was Van Noy. We need one or two more. Can Rivers or Wise start wreaking true havoc? Can the second (first in the league) McCourty twin start really locking people down? Can Simon cement himself as a go-to LB? We need someone to put their hand up.

To bring it back to the first paragraph of this rant of a mad man, none of this would matter if the Pats eternally sucked and we had no business being football fans. Year after year they play this game where they put together a great record while slowly getting themselves organized and eventually start cooking as we approach the playoffs and it it exhausting. But with Brady not being a spring chicken and our team looking more listless than normal earlier this season, I am stressed the fuck out about a 6-2 team almost 20 years into a Goddam dynasty and it STINKS. I need Brown/Shelton to be Wilfork, Simon/Roberts to be Ted Johnson, and Hogan to be Topher Playoffs (working on it) right stat now. And you know what? Wiping the floor with Aaron Rodgers and the Packers would be a great fucking start.

 

 

 

 

 

The 300s Bloggers’ WEEE ARE THE CHAMPIONS Fantasy Football Round Up – Week 8

By on • ( Leave a comment )

So I know this is a fantasy FOOTBALL blog but fuck me if I’m not going to again mention my, and your, 2018 World Series Champion Boston Red Sox. Champagne for everyone. (No, I’m not adding that stupid fucking hashtag because I’m not 12. Carry on.)

Lots going on this week in the NFL. Trade deadline is set for 4:00pm EST today and there are a ton of names that could move, both stemming from general disgruntlement (actually is a word) and teams in complete disarray that might as well have a yard sale to get ready for the future.

Speaking of disarray, let’s see how we all did this week.

Joey B (Completely Incompetent)

I got paved again which was not fun. This was highlighted by C.J Uzomah dropping  a goose egg and Sammy Watkins lit it up on my bench while watching his counterpart, Devin Funchess, do dick on the field. I still managed about 110 pts though, which isn’t awful for a loss. We’re trending.

Papa G (Bill and Mets fan)

Got absolutely thrashed this week. 0-3 across all my leagues. That bum RB on New England did nothing for me and I’m still down 3 or 4 starters. Dalvin Cook and Leonard Fournette better come back soon or this is going to go off the rails quickly. I’m a fringe playoff team in all my leagues and I need someone to step up to the plate quickly. Thank god for James Conner, that’s really all I have to say.

 

Red (Drives to New Hampshire for wine)

I don’t often make good decisions in fantasy football, but when I do I like to peacock. Chris Carson has been riding my bench all year, but I threw him in my lineup and he rewarded me with 22 points in a week where I was without Ezekiel Elliott. Also shoutout to Mattes for giving me this opportunity. With a win against him this week, its kept me at .500 and while not clinically dead, my team is still on life support with an outside shot at the playoffs. Mattes has since changed his team name to BYE WEEK so I’m sure he was thrilled with his players’ effort. 

Big Z (Don’t know much about the guy, may not exist)

No complaints from me. I rolled up a league-high 126 points this week. I guess I could have had a a few extra points had I played Christian McCaffrey instead of James White, or pretty much anyone instead of Devin Funchess, but that’s small potatoes. I’m now in second place in my league despite being 8th in total points. Must be my “defense.”

Things are definitely looking up for the Big Z Fantasy Empire

 

Mattes (Possible addition to chicken wings)

1-7…ONE AND FREAKIN’ SEVEN. I have NEVER suffered through such a miserable season, or even come close. The sad part is I thought I had a pretty good chance to win this week, but Red had Davante Adams and a resurgent Larry Fitz go H.A.M. for him on Sunday. Getting a goose egg from your tight end doesn’t help either. This just sucks.

Lost in my other league as well, falling to .500 on the year. DJ didn’t have the breakout game I was hoping for now that he has a competent offensive coordinator calling plays. I also had to stream C.J. Beathard this week with Rivers on a bye. (It’s a two-QB league; the only other option on the wire was Brock Osweiler, so don’t judge.) Also, O.J. Howard and Tarik Cohen, both of whom I somehow picked up just two weeks ago, continue be awesome. This team’s doing OK. At least I got something to still give a shit about.

Patriots Bills Week 8 Game Preview, Odds, and Things to Watch For

By on • ( Leave a comment )

Image result for patriots bills

So this might be one of the easiest previews I’m going to write this season, as I expect this one to be an absolute rout. With all due to respect to Papa Giorgio – our resident Bills/Islanders/Mets fan and apparent masochist – this is going to be child’s play for the Patriots and there’s really not a whole lot to talk about. Let’s hop right to it.

As always, here’s a quick look at where, when, and how to watch the game along with the latest lines:

  • Location: New Era Field (Orchard Park, NY)
  • Kickoff: Monday, Oct. 29, 8:15 p.m. ET
  • TV: ESPN
  • Odds (via Odds Shark): Patriots: -14 (spread) / Patriots: -1053 (moneyline) / 44 (total)

The lines for this game really tell the whole story: the Pats are two-touchdown favorites on the road; they’re expected to be responsible for over 60 percent of the game total; and there’s a FOUR-FIGURE moneyline. (For those who don’t know what that last part means, basically it means you would need to bet over $1,000 just to win $100 by picking the Pats to win on Monday night.)

I’m not going to sugarcoat it: the Bills (2-5) are pretty bad. For a team that made the playoffs just last season, it’s actually pretty incredible to see how far they’ve tumbled in such short order.

To be fair, they have at least played pretty well on the defensive side of the ball, currently sitting at No. 11 overall and No. 16 in points per game allowed. They’re also tied for eighth in the league with 19 sacks, led by defensive end Jerry Hughes (4.5 sacks) and the ageless wonder in the middle of the defensive line, Kyle Williams (3.5 sacks).

Second-year cornerback Tre’Davious White is also a criminally underrated player, as he is truly one of the game’s elite. (You might remember him as the guy who Gronk cheap-shotted – resulting in a one-game suspension – the last time these two teams played in Buffalo on December 3 of last season.) In fact, he was so good as a rookie last season that Pro Football Focus not only anointed him their Defensive Rookie of the Year, but they also went so far as to rank him as the No. 2 overall corner in the entire league. The Bills absolutely stole him with the 27th-overall pick in the 2017 draft, and he could be a problem for Josh Gordon this week.

Image result for tre'davious white

White is one of the game’s premiere young defenders.

On offense, it’s just a sad state of affairs. To start, Derek Anderson will be the Bill’s starting quarterback this week. He may truly be the only quarterback in the NFL right now who is a worse option than Nathan Peterman – the Bill’s only other healthy signal-caller, with a career 3-to-9 TD-to-INT ratio – but he’s still going to be the guy leading the way for Buffalo on Monday night.

There once was a time where it looked like Anderson might be something. Back in 2007, as a fresh-faced sophomore, he led the Cleveland Browns to a 10-5 record, which was by far the closest they have been to making the postseason since 2002. He also compiled over 3,700 passing yards and 29 touchdowns that season. You can’t ever take that away from him.

Image result for derek anderson browns

Derek Anderson – back in the glory days.

After that one season, however, he fell completely off a cliff. Though he ended up making 26 more starts over the next three years – two with Cleveland and the third with Arizona – he has spent the last seven seasons holding a clipboard as the backup for Cam Newton in Carolina. In just his fifth start since 2011 last Sunday, he threw three picks and could not even crack 200 yards. Simply put: there’s no need to worry about the Bill’s passing game this week.

The Bills do have a decent pair of guys in the backfield, led by LeSean McCoy. For all the flak McCoy gets for his injury woes, you might be surprised to hear that he has actually started at least 15 games in three of the last four seasons heading into 2018. The only problem is, minor ailments and game script have kept him from making much noise outside of two games this year; besides two solid 19-plus-touch, 90-plus-yard performances in Weeks 5 and 6, Shady has averaged just 7.8 touches and 31.8 yards across his other four games. The man is coming off of two straight 1,500-yard seasons before this, though, so he can definitely do some damage if he does play. Chris Ivory is a solid backup as well, and, per ESPN’s Mike Rodak, he’s expected to play after dealing with a hammy issue earlier in the week.

(MONDAY AFTERNOON UPDATE: According to Schefty, Shady has cleared concussion protocol and will play tonight.)

Image result for lesean mccoy

I’m not sleeping on you, Shady. I know what you’re capable of.

Storylines

(Gronk’s Time to Shine): Per usual, Buffalo native Rob Gronkowski will be looking to feast in his old stomping grounds. He just seems to hit another level every time he’s in Buffalo. Per Rich Hribar of Rotoworld, in seven career games in Upstate New York, Gronk has averaged 9.6 targets, 6.3 catches, 104.3 yards, and one touchdown per contest. After not having Gronk for the Bears game last week, the big tight end returned to practice Thursday afternoon and all signs point toward him being ready to go on Monday night. Especially considering how last year’s game ended up there, Gronk will be chomping at the bit to get out on the field and dominate, feeding off of what is sure to be a rowdy Bills Mafia crowd that should be on his case all game long.

Image result for gronkowski eating

Get ready to watch Gronk feast on Monday night.

(Gordon to Slow His Roll): As mentioned above, Josh Gordon is very likely to see a lot of coverage from Tre’Davious White this week, limiting his upside and potential impact on Monday night. Since he will be taking up most of White’s attention, however, that should open things up for the rest of the offense – including for former Bill, Chris Hogan, who posted six catches last week against the Bears and has over 60 yards in each of the Pats’ past two games. I’m not saying Gordon is going to be invisible in this one, but do expect his red-hot play to finally cool down a bit this week.

(What You Got, Kenjon?): With Sony Michel very unlikely to play in this week’s contest, former Panthers and Eagles (and Oregon Ducks!) running back Kenjon Barner will serve as the between-the-tackles compliment to James White in Week 8. White will still dominate most of the backfield touches, but Barner will be called upon to tote the rock quite a bit, especially if the Pats go up big, as expected. Last week, he carried the ball 10 times for 36 yards after Michel went down and has averaged over four yards a carry for his career. Thankfully, Michel should be coming back at some point over the next couple of weeks, and hopefully Barner can get it done in the meantime.

Prediction

This will be an absolute massacre. The Pats will be up by at least two scores at the half, if not more, and Derek Anderson will demonstrate even further that it’s probably time to hang ’em up for good. The Pats win this one in an absolute blowout, 37-12.

The 300s “No One Named Eli Has Ever Been Good At Anything” Fantasy Football Round Up – Week 7

By on • ( Leave a comment )

I’m busy at work and mad at fantasy football so all I have to say is go Sox and enjoy the fantasy takes.

Mattes

Having the second-least amount of points in the league and the most points scored against is just not a good combo. Got an almost 40-berger out of Mitchell Trubisky as a streamer and still lost by almost 80 to the league’s top scorer. At least I have an extra second-rounder next year, and it’s looking like Kerryon Johnson is going to be a stud sixth-round keeper (179 yards of total offense this week). I’m just trying not to finish last at this point.

Had a great week in my other league, but – you guessed it! – I ran into the week’s high-scorer. Got 70 points out of my receivers alone, though, and now that Arizona has someone competent running the offense I’m hoping David Johnson has a little second-half resurgence.  Also, it looks like I’m not going to lose Sony Michel for the year after all, and I was somehow able to snag Tarik Cohen last week, who has three-straight 20-plus point games. I’m 4-3 and feeling good about things to come.

 

Papa G

In a shocking turn of events, I continued my hot streak to go 3-0 again this week. Beat Red by a solid 3 points thanks to Julio Jones. A special thanks to the New York Giants for being a dumpster fire and making this all possible. In one of my other leagues I won by .14 points so luck was on my side this week. Fully expect to nose dive soon enough though.

 

Red

I would like to thank Ezekiel Elliott for murdering any chances I had this week in both of my leagues with a whopping 5 points. How bout them Cowboys indeed. Also, shoutout to Papa Giorgio for beating me by 3 points on garbage time stats in the 4th quarter of Monday Night Football. 

 

Big Z

Picked up a 98-81 win in Week 7 to improve to 4-3 and move into a tie for third place in my league. James White and the New England D/ST came up big for me. Of course it didn’t hurt that my opponent wasn’t up for the London game in time to bench Melvin Gordon who was out.

My only gripe comes from the TE position. I’ve got Eric Ebron and George Kittle. They both seem to be boom or bust, and I’ve yet to figure how to play the right guy any given week. At least it didn’t cost me a win in Week 7, and gets me a little bit closer to the Bench Points Championship

 

Joey B

My team is just awful and I lost by 20 to fall to 3-4. Whatever.

 

 

Patriots Bears Postgame Thoughts and Quick Hits

By on • ( Leave a comment )

Image result for patriots bears

WOOO! That a was close one.

The Pats pulled out the 38-31 victory in Chicago yesterday, but that was only after the Bears put up a great fight and almost came through with a miracle play at the very last possible moment.

The game ended up being a lot more high-scoring than I anticipated, but it was almost just as close. While they were able to contain most of the Bears’ weapons throughout much of the day, Mitchell Trubisky did post over 400 yards of total offense by himself – looking like Michael freakin’ Vick in his prime at times – and the defense allowed a lot of yards over the middle of the field.

Overall, though, it was a good performance against a still very underrated team. Here are a few postgame tidbits for you to wash down with your Wheaties on this fine Monday morning.

Say It Ain’t So, Sony!

After a string of very impressive performances for the rookie, I cautioned everyone to temper expectations heading into Sunday’s contest against the Bears’ top-10-rated run defense. Michel made me look foolish by ripping off 18 yards on his first carry of the day (although he did only have four yards on three carries after that) before going down with what looked like a gruesome leg injury early in the second quarter. As of early Monday morning, we still don’t know the severity of the injury, but it definitely did not look good, especially for a guy with his injury history. More to come on this story, which should be expected after he undergoes an MRI at some point today.

(MONDAY AFTERNOON UPDATE: So we still don’t officially know the final ruling on the injury, but we did get this from NFL Network’s Ian Rapoport on Monday:

There’s speculation it could be an MCL sprain, but thankfully NOT a tear. We probably won’t know much more until the Pats are forced to release injury updates later on in the week. For now, Pats Nation will hold its collective breath.

ANOTHER UPDATE: Schefty coming in hot with a bit more details later on in the afternoon:

Hallelujah! Looks like the kid dodged a bullet.)

Big Ups to the Big Boys Up Front

The Pats offensive line has been phenomenal all season long, and they continued their excellent performance in the Windy City on Sunday. Although Khalil Mack was playing at less than 100 percent, they still only allowed just one sack on the day (which, by the way, Pro Football Focus blamed on a broken screen play as opposed to any particular lineman’s error [h/t NESN.com]). Shaq Mason, especially, has been playing at an elite level, and he’s certainly proving that he’s worthy of that $50 million extension he signed this offseason. If the line can play this well against one of the league’s premier defensive units, that bodes well for the durability of our elder statesman at quarterback. Big round of applause to the entire offensive line. Just a helluva job all around.

Image result for shaq mason

The big fella’s been one of the game’s elite so far in 2018.

Pass-Rush Continues to Improve

OK. OK. So maybe my article from a few weeks ago was a tiny bit Chicken Little-ish. While I’m certainly not going to go so far as to say the Pats have a “great” pass-rush, by any means, it’s definitely not “bad.” The team finished with two sacks in total, but were also credited with 13 hurries and three other QB hits. Adrian Clayborn finally got in on the action with his first takedown of the year, and Kyle Van Noy – while perhaps a bit lacking in terms of coverage yesterday – was able to pin his ears and get in Trubisky’s face with five pressures on the day. The team probably could have had more sacks were it not for Trubisky’s surprising elusiveness (he ran for 81 yards on the day, including this absolutely ridiculous touchdown run). Overall, I’m happy with what I’ve seen from the defensive front past two weeks.

Image result for deatrich wise bears

Deatrich Wise continued his strong season yesterday with yet another QB takedown.

Other quick hits:

  • Josh Gordon continues to prove his worth, playing on 95 percent of the snaps and hauling in four big catches for 100 yards on the day. A few of the catches came at key, momentum-changing moments of the game, and there’s no doubt that he’s become one of Brady’s favorite weapons that he’s had in quite some time. As Julian Edelman said this weekend: “THANK YOU, CLEVELAND!!!”
  • Cordarrelle Patterson may not be making as much of an impact in the receiving game as many hoped he would, but his impressive 95-yard kickoff return for a score yesterday showed just how impactful he can be in other areas of the game. That vicious jump cut he made just before breaking loose literally made me go “WOOOO,” and he then continued to look like a barreling freight train the rest of the way to pay dirt. That play was the sixth kickoff return TD of his career, tied for third all time and just two behind all-time leaders Josh Cribbs and Leon Washington.
  • Preseason standout J.C. Jackson saw by far his most action of the season so far, playing on 38 percent of the team’s snaps. He rewarded the team for their confidence in him with a diving interception, and we could soon be seeing a lot more of out of the rookie cornerback from Maryland. Kudos, kid!

Next up is what should be an absolute cupcake of a matchup against the Buffalo Bills (sorry, Papa Giorgio) next Monday night in Foxborough. Be sure to check in on Thursday for the game preview!